The Pretender
by Dyna Dee
Summary: AU, Yaoi. Duo has always had a good imagination, and used it to cope with his tragic childhood as well as his current problems. But will this once useful trick of the mind become his downfall or salvation?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Once again, I don't own these GW characters and make not even a dime from the hours I spend writing about them.

**The Pretender  
Dyna Dee**

Warnings: AU, yaoi 1x2, 3x4, various past relationships

**Chapter 1**

Fingers flying across the keys of a laptop produce a constant tapping sound that was familiar yet unobtrusive beneath the voices conversing in the long, narrow room. Charise DuFrame stands at the head of the table, confident, decisive and dominating the conversation as she assigns her talented staff a variety of tasks to be completed during the next business quarter. A top designer, savvy business woman and fashion mogul, Charise is respected and admired in both the fashion and business worlds. Her designs are worn by celebrities, politicians and their spouses as well as any person willing to part with large sums of money to purchase her clothing, eye wear, jewelry, hosiery and shoes in styles she's created and proudly fixed her first name to.

Pausing to adjust his glasses from where they'd slipped down his nose, her assistant missed only a beat before he continued to catch as much of the conversation as humanly possible. To his relief, Charise paused for a breath and then another as she straightened the papers in front of her before looking up at the assemblage.

"All right, I think that's it for today. To reiterate what had been decided, Duo, would you please read everyone's assignment back to us, beginning from Lisa's press release for the next show."

He nodded, scrolled his notes up the page and began to read off each name and the task their esteemed boss had entrusted to them. Coming to the end of the list, he looked back to Charise and paused for further instructions. Today the middle aged woman had dressed down from her normal office attire, wearing a pale pink knit jersey workout suit that contrasted nicely with her white hair. Beneath the jacket, zipped halfway down, she wore a matching pink, soft green and white paisley T-shirt. Casual dress for a casual work week, or that's what Charise called this out-of-the-office adventure at her western-style ranch nestled in the Sierras between Reno and Tahoe. Though the mode of dress was definitely more casual than usual, the workload during their four days at the ranch had been nearly as intense as it was in the city. The selected staff members happily complied with Charise's dress-down order, happy enough to be out of their daily business apparel. Duo wondered if the others had to do what he had, scrambling around at the last minute to find some outrageously priced casual clothing that looked classy yet comfortable and, hopefully, earning a nod of approval from their employer if each smart outfit worn during the week had been designed by Charise.

Giving her aide a please smile, Charise said, "Thank you, Duo." Then to the rest of the group seated at the table she asked, "Any questions?" As the designer sat down in her chair, she fielded the few questions her staffed, clarifying their tasks. Taking a moment, Duo considered his boss for a moment. Charise was slight of build, almost too thin, with pure white hair that was always lightly curled and heavily hair sprayed into place. She scanned the room with shrewd blue eyes that were used to eking out the slightest details, always looking for flaws or improvements. A smile tipped the corners of her pink lipstick coated lips when it appeared there were no more questions and the meeting was over.

Rising from her chair again commanded the attention from everyone in the room. Then taking a deep breath she began to bring the morning meeting to an end. "All right then, I guess that's all we need to cover today. I expect each of you to take some time this afternoon to outline a course of what course of action you plan on taking for completion your project. I want to have a rough draft of that on my desk when we meet tomorrow at ten.

"On another note," she said, her eyes sweeping across the table to take everyone in, "let me remind you that we only have two days left here at the ranch and I would like each of you to go home sporting a bit of a healthy tan, proof that you've gotten out of doors at least a couple of times during our stay here. Those back at the main office won't be jealous of our little working vacation unless there's at least a bit of proof that there was some fun involved." A trickle of obligatory laughter followed, though any lack of enthusiasm could be attributed to each individual in the room contemplating their new assignment. Charise meant well, Duo knew, but he doubted any one of her executive staff would go out for a swim or play horseshoes until they came up with an outlined strategy to present to her the next morning. "Now go and have lunch," she ordered with a grin. "Don't forget the barbeque tonight, I expect to see everyone in attendance as I've arranged a little entertainment for after dinner that I'm sure you'll enjoy."

Duo continued typing for only a moment or two after the designer resumed her chair. Several of the others in the room came to the front of the table to speak with her, confirming one thing or another, so Duo spent that time checking over his notes, searching for any glaring mistakes.

Noticing the room had suddenly become quiet, and the young man who served as the powerful woman's assistant looked up from the screen of his laptop to see everyone had emptied out of the room and that Charise was staring at him with a look of contemplation.

"Really, Duo, what am I going to do with you? You're pale as a ghost and I swear you've lost weight again."

"I'm just a little tired," he answered, pushing his long, cinnamon-colored plait of hair over his shoulder. "I'll be fine after a rest."

She continued to study him, trying to determine if the young man who'd become her right hand was truly all right. "Are you still seeing that son-of-a-bitch therapist?"

"You mean Quatre?" he asked, frowning at his boss's favorite name for his shrink.

"I'm talking about the man stealer."

Rather than get into the old argument that began moments after he'd tearfully blurted out that his last boyfriend had left him for his therapist, he simply answered, "Yeah, I'm still seeing him."

The older woman's expression let him know just how much she disapproved of his decision to continue seeing Quatre Winner, two months after Trowa announced his reason for breaking up with him. Duo really couldn't blame Charise, though; he'd been a mess for several weeks after his boyfriend had dumped him in a very civilized, polite and apologetic manner. He had honestly thought Trowa, a kind, patient and compassionate man with looks to kill and a body to drool over, was going to be the one to help him overcome his insecurities. His defection, understandable really, led Duo to truly believe that he was doomed to spend the rest of his life alone, an emotional eunuch. He had been making notable progress with Quatre before that unfortunate night when Trowa had announced his defection. The reason Trowa had left him? Love. His boyfriend had fallen in love with Quatre Winner and had been seeing him on the sly. Oh, nothing torrid, just casual lunches and an occasional drink after work, time enough to get to know each other and fall head over heels in love.

The two had been waiting for him at his apartment that Friday night after work. He'd come home hoping to spend some quality time with Trowa only to find his lover was not alone. He stood in the living room with his arm draped possessively over the therapist's shoulders. "We have something to tell you," Trowa announced gravely, looking nervous but determined as he delivered the blow. Then with shamed eyes cast down, the man Duo had pinned so many hopes on stated softly that he never meant to hurt him, but there had been so many issues in their relationship, so many hurdles to cross that he no longer believed he could wait until Duo was better. Both Trowa and Quatre briefly expressed terrible remorse that their happiness was hurting someone they both cared about, but they felt it was right to tell him, not wanting to be dishonest with him about their feelings for each other or their relationship. In shock, Duo muttered that he understood and even thanked them for their honesty, but inwardly he knew it was his own fault his boyfriend had turned to another.

He tried to take it like a man, so he sucked it up and wished them well, but inside he bawled like a lost and lonely child, abandoned yet again because of his inability to be intimate with a man.

The door shut behind the two men not ten minutes after Duo had walked into his apartment, and the braided man crumbled to the floor and wept his broken heart out, desperately afraid of never being able to love or trust anyone again.

It had taken two months of grieving and suffering from the terrible ache in his heart caused by betrayal and loss before he could go to work dry eyed. Working so closely with Charise, it didn't take more than five minutes for her to figure out that something was terribly wrong, and two minutes after that she'd managed to weasel the whole pitiful story out of him. Fearful for his mental state, she urged him to see another therapist. He finally agreed, but managed to put it off for another couple of months, allowing himself time to overcome his despondency on his own, but the extra time hadn't improved his mental state.

Seeking out another therapist while being depressed seemed too arduous a task to undertake, so he went the easiest route by calling Quatre. The man, after all, was familiar with him, aware of his past and hangups. Those were some of the reasons he'd used in talking the reluctant therapist into working with him again. With Quatre's agreement to see him again as his patient, Duo buried his hurt and resentment as much as possible and concentrated on getting over his depression and fear of being intimate with another man.

Charise's disapproving voice brought him quickly out of his reverie. "It's not healthy or sane for you to seek help from someone who stole your boyfriend out from under your nose."

He shook his head. "It's as much my fault as it is theirs. No sense cutting off my nose to spite my face."

The woman's perfectly reconstructed nose wrinkled slightly with distaste. "I've always hated that expression."

"It fits, unfortunately."

Placing her hand on top of his head, she gently stroked his hair, most of it pulled into a braid at the back of his neck. "But is he really helping you, Duo?"

"I think so, but it's hard to tell. We've examined the reasons why I have my particular problem, namely my aunt, and Quat's given me a couple of exercises designed to help me get over the mental roadblocks I keep putting up whenever anyone tries to get intimate with me." He sighed suddenly. "Let me tell you, it sucks to be a twenty-four-year-old virgin."

"I can't even imagine," the woman said with a roll of her eyes and a guilty smile, which made Duo laugh.

"What does he say about your aunt?"

The mention of the woman, by title and not her name, caused a clouded expression to darken the handsome face. "He wants me to cut all ties with her, thinking she's toxic to my well being, but I just can't. She's the only living relative I have left. How can I not speak to her?"

"Would you keep a viper next to your heart, dear?"

Duo closed his eyes. He'd had this same argument with Quatre at his office, and again with Trowa over dinner one night. His aunt was the main reason for his problems, or at least that had been Quatre's reasoning, too. But for all her faults he still loved her, despite her having ruined him from ever having a normal relationship with another man. Her warnings, spoken gently and with concern at first, had gradually turned into daily lectures and adamant pleading, especially after she divorced her husband. It was as if she were taking her anger at her husband out on him. Her never-ending lectures had done exactly what she had intended; they had come between himself and any man he'd tried to have sex with, even those he'd developed a relationship with, including Trowa and Wufei. Both men, as well as all the others he'd dated, seriously or not, had eventually considered him a lost cause and had left him to move on to more fulfilling relationships, always promising to remain his friend, though no one but Trowa had really made any attempt to do so.

Eight months had passed since Trowa announced that he'd fallen in love with his therapist, and it still hurt knowing he'd lost another good man because he panicked whenever they'd tried becoming more physically intimate. It was more than a little embarrassing that Charise knew so much about his problems and his past. The woman just had a way of getting information out of him.

"You don't want to talk about this any more, do you?" his boss asked.

"No," he confessed quietly

Charise sighed with defeat. "All right, I'll let this go on one condition."

Duo saved the page of notes that he'd been typing and closed his laptop, working on automatic as he asked, "Condition?"

"I want you to have some fun while we're here. We're in the country, for heaven's sake, and you've kept yourself cooped up in the lodge since our arrival.

"I've been out a couple of times," he protested.

Charise shook her head. "No, I mean out for a couple of hours. Today." Duo was about to protest that there were calls to be made, arrangements to set up and invitations to Charise's preview of her Spring line to be sent out when the designer cut him off. "In fact," she continued, "I've made arrangement for you to go horseback riding with Hilde. She lives here year round, one of the property's caretakers, and she knows every inch of the property. A couple of hours straddling a big sweaty horse ought to make you feel like a new man." A naughty grin accompanied that last sentence.

Duo rolled his eyes at her attempt to make a joke. "I don't know how to ride a horse."

"What better time to learn?" she asked with a chuckle. "I want you to go up to your room, change into your pair of Jon DePaul jeans, the ones that hug that gorgeous ass of yours so delightfully, then meet Hilde in the stables. She'll have a lunch prepared for the both of you to share on the trail." While speaking, Charise leaned forward and picked his laptop up from the table, basically telling the young man she wanted him to be on his way. Duo stood, as expected, reclaimed the laptop from her hands and stepped back just before she began to push him towards the conference room door. "Fun, my beautiful, irreplaceable Duo, is just what the doctor ordered. I'll see you tonight."

After receiving her kiss on his cheek, he set off for his room imagining himself falling off a bucking horse and screaming for all he was worth while holding onto the reins for dear life. He was definitely not looking forward to this forced outing.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**The Pretender  
Chapter 2**

Hilde turned out to be a young woman in her early twenties, or so he guessed, with short black hair hidden almost completely beneath a brown, wide-brimmed cowboy hat. Her tanned skin was free of blemish other than a smattering of freckles across the bridge of her trim little nose which was set above a wide mischievous grin. Her small, boy-like body was clothed in faded blue jeans with a leather belt and a large silver belt buckle, a cotton floral print blouse with pearl snaps down the front and over the breast pockets, and worn cowboy boots. She talked faster than a friendly New York cab driver during rush hour as she saddled their horses, describing how the task was done, then proceeded to instruct him on how to mount the saddle and use the reins to turn, stop and back the enormous animal up. He didn't quite understand her description of the different ways to kick a horse, getting the beast to move at different gaits and speed, so he resigned himself to learning that the hard way, by trail and error. Jazz, the buckskin horse that was his mount, appeared enormous and unfriendly from where he stood three feet away from the snorting, dirt pawing animal. With a nervousness he rarely experienced, he put his sneaker into the stirrup and pulled himself up into the saddle. Sitting on top of the behemoth a few minutes later didn't help the city boy feel any better about this planned adventure.

Hilde, now seated on her own white and black Appaloosa, grabbed the reins from him and led his horse out of the corral then turned them toward a well-worn trail behind the barn. Duo quickly picked up yet another interesting fact about his horse; Jazz seemed to like one particular gait, trotting. He was pretty sure his teeth were going to be ruined after the severe jaw snapping jarring they experienced from the punishing up and down movement. Holding onto the saddle horn with a death grip, his horse continued to trot, threatening to unseat him at any moment before Hilde grabbed onto the harness, causing Jazz to slow to a walk. Duo's hands were aching from the tight grip he'd had on the saddle horn, and they hadn't even left the property yet. His feeling of doom fail to lift after noticing his guide seemed highly amused by his struggles as a novice horse rider.

He was enormously grateful when the horses finally slowed to a steady walking pace as they began to climb the inclining path that wove up the green hills. As he became more familiar with the feel of the animal beneath him, Duo relaxed and eventually began to enjoy the beauty of his surroundings.

Charise told him she'd owned this ranch for a little over five years and came to it whenever she could manage to get away from her hectic life. Duo had been here before, but only on working vacations such as this one. Never during those previous visits had he taken part in the many activities the modern ranch had to offer, he'd been too busy trying to carry out his tasks and prepare for the next day, an upcoming meeting, event or to circumvent an impending disaster. His position as Charise's assistant was both coveted by other workers as well as a source of pity from them. Charise was a well-known perfectionist and task master. He'd caught her eye shortly after he'd started working at Duframe Designs, having been hired by one of her college recruiters. He'd happily accepted the initial job offer, knowing he'd be starting at the bottom, but with high hopes for climbing the corporate ladder as he proved his business acumen, skills and willingness to learn.

Initially, he'd been hired as an assistant to another assistant in wardrobe, and was placed in a busy workroom on the far end of the design floor, also known as the outer limits. Regardless of his lowly position, he'd been introduced to the company's namesake on his second day on the job. He would never forget how the famous designer's eyes widened at first sight of him, and a slow, Cheshire cat grin grew on her face. "Exquisite," she'd said approvingly, and he recalled how his ears had burned with embarrassment. He was aware that others found him attractive, but he'd always downplayed his appearance, finding, in most cases, his looks generally brought him more grief than good fortune.

His job, during the first month at Duframe Designs, consisted of menial tasks and fetching for the design team and their assistants. He gave each task his full attention and learned everything he could about the fashion world from the lower end of the business. At the six week mark, the assistant over him delivered a summons to Charise's office. He'd set down the phone list he'd been calling from, made sure his shirt was tucked in properly before putting on his suit jacket, then went directly to her office, ignoring the curious eyes following him.

No one was more stunned than he when Charise offered him the job as executive assistant. By the way she'd appraised his appearance, her eyes moving from head to toe, he guessed that the designer had probably elevated him from his lowly place in wardrobe on account of his looks. Whatever her reason for choosing him above all others, he wasn't about to turn down a prime job with a healthy increase in income. If his appearance got him through the door, he would prove to her that he was worth the opportunity she was giving him. With that as his goal, he quickly made himself indispensable to the famous designer, doing whatever he could to make her day run smoothly.

In time, not only did he prove himself adept at multitasking, but he'd also gained a friend and staunch ally. Charise treated him with the utmost respect, though she seemed to love dragging out of him each and every little tidbit of his personal life that she could. She had laughed and cried with him and even became protective of her "darling Duo", and sometimes, like today, tried to arrange his life for him. He generally tolerated her interference, knowing she did it for all the right reasons; she honestly cared about him.

He shifted in the saddle and winced. His backside and thighs were beginning to feel sore, unfamiliar with horseback riding. He had to admit a little pain was worth it, though, for the countryside was beautiful, the air refreshingly clear. Everything here was so different from his life in Los Angeles. As the horse continued to climb the winding hillside trail, he let his mind wander, imagining what it must have been like to be a cowboy in the eighteen hundreds, taming the wild west. He loved reading, especially stories about the old west, both autobiographical and fiction, but working for Charise during the past few years hadn't allowed him the time to indulge in his favorite past time. Reading for pleasure definitely took a back seat when the need for sleep weighted him down.

It could have been the slow rocking movement caused by the horse's steady climbing, as well as the unique view of the rugged mountain trail and enjoying the peace of the outdoors that allowed him to truly relax and indulge his active imagination by conjuring up stories he'd read as a teenager featuring cowboys, cattle ranches and the gold rush. He tried to imagine what his life would have been like had he lived then. He chuckled to himself, unable to imagine life as a gay cowboy. No doubt he wouldn't have had a very happy life, living back in the days of the wild west, not from the stories he'd read. He stopped himself from following that particular train of thought, choosing to think more positive on such a beautiful day.

Shutting out all negative thoughts, he tried to imagine what it would have been like to be a cowboy or settler in the 1800's. A man living in the eighteen hundreds would have to be strong enough to ride a horse for hours on end, turn a field, fight attacking Indians or encroachers, maybe even a defend himself from a bear or mountain lion. He settled an image in his mind of a cowboy and suddenly found himself being terribly turned on by the idea of meeting one. He happened to be attracted to strong, take charge kind of guys.

Shaking his head, he reminded himself that fiction was not reality, and that the only cowboys he'd seen were in Texas, when he'd accompanied Trowa on a business trip. They'd gone to a bar to get a feel for the locals, and he had to admit that the rugged, good looking men he'd met- dressed in tight jeans, cowboy boots and western hats - were pretty hot.

He was brought out of his daydream of dancing with a tall, dark and handsome Texan when the horses reached the summit. Hilde stopped their mounts and let Duo take in the view. It was stunning. Rolling hills painted with yellow grass and wild flowers and dotted by patches of pine trees made up a greater part of the landscape that surrounded them, and he could see for miles and miles in every direction. "Fantastic," he whispered in awe. Looking behind him, his eyes traced the long path leading back to the Charise's ranch, which now seemed so far away. Hilde assured him the ranch was only about three miles back, as the crow flies, though the horses had walked much further.

Over the top of the rolling hills and in the distance he could see a small city and thought about how nice it would be to live in such a bucolic setting. They dismounted, with a little difficulty on his part due to stiffness, and Hilde spread out a blanket and the two of them enjoyed a leisurely lunch consisting of a couple of sandwiches, fruit and soft drinks. While his companion re-packed what was left of their meal, prattling on about a movie she'd seen the week before, he took a moment to breathe in deeply and stretch his legs and back muscles while enjoying the smell of pine trees and clean air that he rarely experienced living in a large city. Then over his companion's shoulder, he spotted something unusual half way down the next hill. Cut into the hillside there appeared to be a large ranch surrounded by lush greenery. In the center of the property sat a stately yellow house, one that looked plucked out of the Victorian age.

"What's that?" He pointed towards the oddity set in the Sierra landscape.

Hilde followed his line of sight and a smile came to her lips as she saw what he was referring to. "Ah, that's The Light On The Hill," she answered.

Duo lifted his sunglasses to get a better look at it. It appeared to be a ranch house, and a good sized one at that. "A religious retreat."

Hilde's bark of laughter told him he'd guessed wrong. "A house of pleasure. Here, I'll give you a boost up." She led him to his horses side and help him to remount.

Duo was still thinking about her description of the house. A house of pleasure could mean either a full-treatment spa or a whore house. From the rather salacious grin on his companion's face, he guessed it was the latter. "Ever been to one?" she asked with a suggestive wiggle of her black eyebrows.

He blinked at her question. "Um... I'm gay."

She simple shrugged at his confession. "They cater to most sexual preferences. What do you say we drop by there on the way back, let the horses get a drink and rest our legs?"

Duo bit his lip, "I don't know," he said worriedly, even as Hilde's horse began to move forward. What was he to do but follow?

A good hour later Duo felt some of his hesitation for stopping at the house of ill repute slip away, mostly because he was warm, thirsty and had to take a piss - something he did not want to do with Hilde watching. As they continued on the dusty trail, Hilde spoke at great length about The Light On The Hill, which, she informed him, had been open for business since the turn of the century. She added that it was rated as a five-star brothel. Duo wondered if there really was such a rating, and who in hell judged such a thing?

According to his guide, the Light on the Hill was famous for attracting rich clientele from both near and far. She assured him the place would be nearly deserted this time of day, with the employees spending most of the daylight hours sleeping and preparing for the evening to come. They'd just stop, take a quick look around while stretching their legs before heading back down to Charise's ranch.

As they drew closer, Duo could better appreciate the size of the ranch. The garden surrounding the house was enormous, with tall leafy trees, shrubs and flowers presenting the picture of an oasis in the middle of nowhere. The house itself was nestled in the center front of all the greenery. The structure itself was three stories tall, painted in a soft shade of yellow with white trim and shutters. Adding to the picturesque setting was a large wrap-around porch, including two old-fashioned swings and hanging baskets with cascading flowers, making the house fit perfectly with his idea of the old west. A well-cared for barn, painted in the same pale yellow, was set off to the far right of the house and added to the western charm, as did the white painted fence surrounding the property, containing both cattle and horses, which were presently grazing contentedly within its protective borders.

As they made their approach, Duo noticed a person sitting on the fence, not far from the barn. Most likely an employee, he thought. He couldn't determine what the man was doing other than enjoying the warm afternoon, but even from a distance Duo thought the man looked picture perfect. The man was wearing faded blue jeans and a plaid, long-sleeved shirt that no doubt had pearl snaps down the front and over the pockets, similar to Hilde's shirt. The man's tan cowboy hat was tilted back slightly, showing a hint of dark hair beneath. He looked like someone who had stepped out of the past and into the present, a true cowboy. Duo's pants tighten in response to his fantasy of being swept off his feet by a strong, capable, manly man.

It took everything in him to pull his eyes away from the vision before him, and just before he managed to do so the object of his fantasy turned his head and looked directly at him in return. Duo quickly looked forward, blushing with embarrassment at having been caught staring. But damn, that was one good-looking cowboy. Even with the closing distance that separated them, he could appreciate the tan skin, dark hair and a piercing gaze that seemed to look right through him. _What would it be like to have a man like that_? he asked himself, but then his inner voice scathingly reminded him that such a wish was next to impossible. Even if the cowboy was gay and interested him, he'd no doubt lose him as he had all the others he'd dated after they found out about his not-so-little problem.

Fantasize, that's what Dorothy had encouraged him to do. The long-haired blond and unorthodox therapist was his latest and near desperate attempt to fix himself. When he came to believe that Quatre had gone as far as he possibly could, he'd pulled out a card he'd held onto for nearly a year and called the unconventional therapist. Being a sex therapist, Dorothy's methods were focused on attacking his problem while Quatre was determined to dig deep into his past, find and treat the reason for his problem. He had his fingers crossed that between the two of them he'd be cured.

Dorothy had suggested he try a little role playing to teach him how to go about using a fantasy in order to have sex with someone. He was making progress, or that's what he liked to believed. Dorothy told him just last week that he was ready, it was just a matter of time until he met the right person. He just had to loosen up and believe it was possible and that any discomfort he'd feel initially at penetration did not mean it was wrong, vile, disgusting or perverted, as his aunt had drilled into his head countless times during his teenage years.

Both Quatre and Dorothy had attributed his fear of intimacy as coming from his aunt, who had systematically poisoned his mind, crippling him from having sex with anyone of the same sex. His aunt had done so believing she was guiding him toward a heterosexual lifestyle. Even to this day she refused to believe that it wasn't his choice to be gay; that he could change his tendencies if he chose to do so.

Funny, he thought, how both of his therapists had determined the cause of his "problem", and yet the two had never spoken with each other. He'd been seeing Quatre for nearly two years, including the months after Trowa had left him. Dorothy came recommended by an old flame, another great potential partner who couldn't wait for him to get "fixed". He'd been seeing her on the sly without Quatre's knowledge. She was unusual in her approach to his problem, probably unethical compared to Quatre's standards, but most likely the one who was actually helping with his intimacy issues.

Fantasies were good, Duo thought, shifting his mind away from his problems. He was actually very good at using his imagination, pretending the world was better than it was, that his problems were less than they were. How else could he have gotten through all the breakups and heartbreaks he'd endured over the past seven years?

The horses stopped at the side of the impressively large house where there was a long post for wrapping the reins around, and a metal trough of water for the horses to drink from. He dismounted his horse and sighed with relief. Hilde snatched up the reins and tied them to the hitching post. Ignoring the few cars parked some distance away, it was easy to look at the place and picture being in the eighteen hundreds. Duo let his imagination run, conjuring up the story that he'd just arrived at the House on the Hill, having been hired by... the owner of the famous pleasure house. His reputation as a male courtesan had preceded him. Hilde was his contact, having met him at the ... train station. He smiled, thinking the story felt right and that he could imagine himself in such a place and time, regardless that he had limited experience in the sex department.

Thinking about his fantasy self, he wondered what a good name for a male prostitute back in the eighteen hundreds would be. Dan? Danny? No, not the right period. Hustace? Eww, no. Wade was too common, but what about... Laredo, as in Laredo, Texas? He recalled a song his eighth grade choral class had sung about a man dying on the streets of that town, calling out to people who passed by and telling them how he should be buried. Yeah, Laredo was a good name for a man of ... ill repute. Duo chuckled to himself, amused by the story forming in his head.

His amusement lasted only a moment, however, for as soon as he took a step away from his horse he found his legs had turned to rubber. He held himself against the horse, hands locked onto the saddle's edge until Hilde came up to him and slung one of his arms over her shoulder. "Sorry," she apologized with a slightly contrite grin. "I guess we came a bit far for a beginner, but I have to tell you, Duo, you're doing very well for your first time riding."

"Thanks," he mumbled between gritted teeth as he tried to make his bowed legs work. Damn, now he knew why cowboys wore chaps, to distract anyone from seeing how bowlegged they were.

Hilde led him slowly up the front porch steps and together they entered the house without knocking. Duo wondered why she didn't knock, then presumed that perhaps customers didn't have to knock at the door of a whore house. It must be like any business establishment where customers are always welcome.

Just like he would have imagined, the entry looked like it was from another era. The interior was elegant, with soft white and gold embossed wallpaper, Victorian chairs and settees upholstered in color rich fabric, and a massive crystal chandelier hanging above a lush pale green floral carpet. To the right of the lobby and adjacent to the magnificent staircase, sat a high-gloss, carved wood counter. Behind it stood a beautiful young blond woman dressed in a midriff-showing checkered blouse, a braid hanging over each shoulder, and a warm smile on her lips. "Hello, Hilde. It's good to see you again."

"Hi, Jillian," the dark haired girl replied while continuing forward to the bar. "My friend and I were riding by and need to take a break. It's his first time on a horse."

Jillian's blue eyes shifted to Duo before they moved with apparent appreciation from his head down to his feet and back up again. "Are you sure you aren't looking for a job, honey?" she asked him. "With your looks you could make us a fortune."

Duo laughed nervously. "I've already got a great job, but thanks," he replied feeling the heat of embarrassment on his cheeks.

The blond shook her head. "Our loss," she said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "What can I get you? Ibuprofen, a shot of whisky or perhaps a massage?"

"All three," he and Hilde answered at the same time, then laughed together, amused.

From under the counter Jillian pulled out a bottle of the promised pain reliever and a bottle of water and pushed both of them towards Duo. "First things first," she said.

The lid on the bottle broke as he twisted it, and he thought water had never tasted better as he took a long swig to chase the pills down his throat. He then proceeded to drink the contents of the entire bottle, trying to quench his thirst. He then remembered the second reason he had decided to visit this establishment. "Restroom?"

"This way," Jillian said, stepping around the counter to lead him down a hallway.

"Is Antonio up yet?" Duo looked to his companion as she asked the question in a casual manner, as if she were asking about a mutual acquaintance, but in her eyes he glimpsed a spark of excitement, maybe even lust.

"He's always 'up' when it comes to you, Hilde," Jillian chuckled while taking Duo's arm. "Why don't you knock on his door and see if he's presentable. We'll square things up before you leave."

Hilde nodded, then looked apprehensively at him before returning to the waiting blonde. "I guess I really shouldn't. Charise told me to take good care of Duo. I don't feel right leaving him on his own in a place he's never been before."

Duo felt his arm patted. "Let me take care of him. I'll see to it he has his whisky and massage. He'll be loosened up and ready to ride by the time you're done riding Antonio."

Hilde's eyes shot to Duo, and they blushed in unison at the other woman's forthright and crude comment. "Are you okay with this, Duo? I mean, I really don't know you at all, and if you're not comfortable being here we'll leave. I don't want it to get back to Charise that you were forced into staying here when you didn't want to."

Even though a part of him wanted to get the hell out of there, he could tell that Hilde did not want to leave. "No, it's okay," he told her with a bit of reluctance. After all, she was his way back to civilization. "Besides, if you tried to get me back on that horse right now, you'd have a battle on your hands." And that was the truth. His butt and inner thigh muscles ached something terrible.

Hilde gave him a grateful smile, then turned to walk briskly toward the thick carpeted staircase and took them two at a time all the way to the top.

"And a gentleman, too." Duo turned his head at Jillian's comment and met her smiling eyes. "Come on, handsome, I'll show you the men's room and then get you that drink."

Feeling much better after relieving his aching bladder, Duo enjoyed the whiskey Jillian provided him, and then much more slowly enjoyed another. He was feeling pretty damn relaxed by the time she led him to the massage room. As instructed, he undressed in a curtained booth, wrapped a small towel around his waist, then lay on the table and waited for the licensed masseuse to come in and take care of his aches and pains.

He easily drifted into his earlier fantasy, imagining he was Laredo, the sought after male prostitute, having newly arrived at his new workplace. The trip by coach, train and then horseback had been dusty and grueling, but the brothel's management had promised to take good care of him, and proved it by hiring a trained masseuse from 'Frisco to see to his every need.

He opened his eyes when the door opened and was pleasantly surprised when a petite and highly attractive Asian woman entered the room, dressed in a white silk kimono. She was a perfect fit for the role he'd cast her in: an immigrant from China, forced to work at the brothel in order to pay the debt her family owed to the railroad company when her brothers had been injured in carving a tunnel through the mountains.

Hands small but strong and very proficient moved across his back, over the taut muscles on his gluteus maximus and thighs. He moaned as she pushed hard, forcing the muscles to contract and then relax. She spoke not a word to him while she worked her magic, which allowed him to relax even further. There was more pleasure to be found in this place than just sex, he decided. He was on the edge of falling sleep when he realized that she had stopped. Opening his eyes, he was surprised to find the room was empty. He lay there for only a few more moments before his curiosity got the better of him and he eased himself up into a sitting position. Moving slowly, he returned to the changing room only to find his clothes were gone and a silk robe lay folded on the bench with a note with a printed map on it inviting him to enjoy the hot tubs to the rear of the garden. Hilde must be having one hell of a good time upstairs to be taking so long, he thought.

The robe was yellow, perfectly matching the color of the house. Must be a theme, he concluded. He was just glad that it covered him to just above his knees. Taking the printed invitation with him and hoping he wouldn't meet anyone on his way there, he followed the map through the door down the hall and out into the enclosed garden to the back of the house. He blinked in surprise to find a series of paths leading away from the building, and by the height of the shrubs, the tops of tall foliage-covered trellises and shaded trees, the garden offered a lot of privacy from both the house and surrounding hillsides.

As directed, he took the path to the right which led him past many secluded benches of which he could only imagine were meant for an outdoor tryst. Just the thought of being that daring and open caused his heart to skip a beat. He kept walking, willing his growing erection away because he knew that silk spots easily and hides nothing.

He passed no one as he walked, but every once in a while he thought he heard footsteps. Probably a gardener. He wondered if even the gardeners at this place were attractive as the two women he'd met. He came to the place were the paths split, and from the map he could see that there were three different hot tubs. He took the one to the right, for no reason other than he felt more comfortable going in that direction. Centered in the midst of circling bushes, offering perfect protection from prying eyes, he found a wooden hot tub submerged into the ground. Glancing around, he made sure he was alone before disrobing and climbing down into the water was hot and making himself comfortable.

Placing his long braid on the deck, Duo laid his head back and thought this place was pretty close to perfect. His mind began to wander again, and he let go where it wanted because daydreaming was something he rarely indulged in since working for Charise. He loved his job, but it took all that he had to do it well, leaving little time, energy or inclination for daydreaming. His daydreams had once been the only way for him to escape his virulent teenage years. Living with Aunt Helen and her husband Hank had been good at first. He'd moved in with them when he was eleven, after his parents had been killed on their way home from the valley in a twenty car pile-up on Highway 5 that had been blamed on dense fog.

But when he turned twelve, things began to change, and for some reason he couldn't remember why. His aunt and uncle began to argue a lot, mostly behind their closed bedroom door. There were large blank spots in his memory at that point, but that wasn't surprising because he never did have a great long-term memory. Quatre thought his lack of memory meant he was hiding something, like the pain he felt at his parents' death and the arguing between his aunt and uncle. A week after his thirteenth birthday, Uncle Hank left the house, and he never heard from the man again. He didn't really recall the circumstances behind it, only that his aunt had been livid and refused to speak about what happened. Snippets of memory supplied the sound of his aunt crying in the room next to his own, which led him to believe Hank had cheated on his aunt and she had found out.

That had been the beginning of yet another dark time he'd had to get through, and he managed it the same way he'd dealt with the loss of his parents, by imagining himself as a transformer, a fire truck by day and a magnificent fighting robot anytime he was needed. His other favorite fantasy was being a genius space explorer, a kid among adults who often stopped to listen to his sage advice. That particular fantasy nearly flunked him out of his freshman year of high school. He'd had to train himself to only indulge in his daydreams when he was in his bed at night, using them as a tool to help him get to sleep.

Just after Hank left, his aunt changed into a different person, one with a new agenda. She lectured him, subtly at first, about how wrong the homosexual lifestyle was, that it was perverted. " If God had meant for men to have sex together, he'd have made a cleaner orifice than one designed for defecating," was something she'd said at least once a week. At first he was confused about her reasoning, and he wondered if his not wanting to cut his hair had led her to believe he was gay. Living most of his days in a fantasy world, as a coping mechanism from the loss of his parents, he really hadn't thought about his sexual orientation. But by the time he hit fourteen, he realized he was attracted to other boys more than he was to girls. His aunt must have somehow sensed that about him, he thought in retrospect, for she stepped up in her efforts to convince him of the wrongness of being gay. Whether she intentionally meant to emotionally sabotage him from having an intimate relationship with another man or was merely trying to make him into a heterosexual with her "preaching", he honestly didn't know. Either way, she'd succeeded in the first and not the later.

Oh to be like Laredo, he thought wistfully, or at least as uninhibited as the character he'd conjured up would be. He imagined himself in the role of a famous and pampered male prostitute in a western setting. It wasn't that he envied the job of a prostitute, no not at all, but it sure provided a host of interesting fantasies. The cowboy he spied sitting on the fence as he'd approached the estate earlier came to mind as a perfect specimen for his imagination. What a man, he thought with longing. Closing his eyes, he imagined that cowboy moseying up to The House On the Hill and pausing at the front door to wipe the dust accumulated from the trail off his boots and hat before he entered. He'd saunter up to the counter and ask if it was true that a long-haired man from San Francisco had been brought into the house its newest employee. After hearing the extravagant cost spending time with such a rare specimen, the cowboy would pause a moment before reaching into his tight jeans to grab a fist full of cash, plenty enough for the entire night. Placing it on the counter, he smiled slowly asked for the "Do Not Disturb" sign.

"Your gun," a girl looking just like Jillian would demand of him, and with reluctance, the cowboy would undo the belt of his holster and then hand it and his gun over to the girl with a warning not to let anyone touch it.

"Mind if I join you?" The deep voice fit right into his plot, imagining himself bathing in one of the upper elegant rooms, in an old fashion bathing tub filled with bubbles that hid what lay beneath the water.

"Suit yourself," Loredo answered with a lazy drawl and a crooked smile.

The water surrounding him rose against his skin as the cowboy entered the hot tub. "You're new here, aren't you?"

"Just arrived from 'frisco," he answered in a lazy drawl, belying the racing of his heart.

"What's your name?"

Duo couldn't help but smile as he replied, "Laredo." What a cool name, he thought to himself.

"As in Laredo, Texas?"

"That's right."

There was a moment's pause, and Duo could imagine that the cowboy was staring at him, trying to see what lay beneath all the bubbling water. His imagination was so good that he could almost feel the man's breath against his neck as he heard the voice, now thick with lust whisper, "Beautiful."

He about jumped out of his skin when he felt warm, wet lips fix themselves onto his own. "What the hell?" he shouted, jumping back. He blinked, shocked speechless at finding the man of his daydreams, the cowboy who had been sitting on the fence earlier, looking at him as if he'd lost his mind. Oh God, maybe he had.

TBC

Author: *waves to everyone* Thanks for commenting. I had to rush through this part today, so hopefully I caught all the corrections. More next weekend. Thanks for reading along.


	3. Chapter 3

**The Pretender  
Part 3  
Warning**: For mature readers only, please! Sexual content

"Are you all right?" asked the blue-eyed handsome hunk sitting next to him in the hot tub. Duo's breath was caught in his throat. He'd been startled by the cowboy, shocked, in fact, that he was actually sitting next to the man after having incorporated his image into a very vivid daydream; but that wasn't the entire reason for his current speechless state. The bare chested god, sitting not more than one foot away and staring at his face with concern, was even more handsome than he'd imagined. He had dark brown, windblown hair and skin that was tan and flawless. The stubble on his jawline added to the stranger's masculine appeal and fit in perfectly with his western-themed daydream. And his eyes, holy shit, they were the deepest blue, slightly slanted and heavily fringed by dark eyelashes. His nose was perfect in size and placement on his handsome face, and set above lips, while not too full, were smooth and moist and so very tempting.

"Who are you?" Duo, wide eyed, finally managed to choke out.

"Exchanging names at a place like this is rather taboo, isn't it?" the cowboy asked in return, a teasing tilt to his lips.

"I gave you my name," Duo countered, his own smile feeling strained. He felt more than a little unnerved by the other man's penetrating gaze.

"Well, _Laredo_, you can call me Tex." The tone in the cowboy's voice as he said his made-up name indicated the other man knew he was using an alias. "Laredo and Tex, sounds like a good match, don't you think?"

Duo grinned back. He had enjoyed pretending to be Laredo, and if the other man was going to go along with this fantasy, it might work to his advantage. This was exactly the type of opportunity he'd been waiting for. He could use his imagination, just as Dorothy had encouraged him to do, and finally get past the final stumbling blocks of his intimacy issues. He would imagine himself as Laredo, a professional prostitute, who had none of his own ridiculous hangs ups. When it came to sex, Laredo would know exactly what to do and how to do it. From the look on his face, Duo could tell the cowboy knew a thing or two himself about that subject.

"A match it is," he found himself saying, and this time he didn't back away when the blue-eyed stranger moved forward and captured his mouth again, giving him a toe-curling kiss he wasn't likely to ever forget.

In his head, he began a steady script to keep himself focused on the here and now and not on his own past. Laredo wouldn't be afraid of kissing a stranger or of the unfamiliar hands mapping out his body. He quickly assimilated himself into the role of the experienced courtesan, letting his hands wander over and around the smooth, bronzed skin, feeling strong shoulders, a nicely sculpted chest, a flat stomach and an impressive show of male anatomy. His right hand circled around that stiff member, and almost instantly the voice of his aunt seeped into his thoughts, telling him that what he was planning on doing was wrong, disgusting and a perversion against nature. He immediately countered the voice, just as Dorothy had taught him, by telling himself that being kissed and held was good. It certainly felt good, and Laredo wanted Tex to just keep on doing what he was doing. Laredo was used to getting whatever he wanted, and at the moment he wanted Tex more than anything.

"There's a room upstairs, want to go there now?" the stranger whispered against his mouth before his lips began a journey to his jaw and down his neck. Duo knew that if he stopped now he might not be able to dredge up the courage to go through with this again. Then it came to him; Tex was an upstairs employee. Damn, his kissing technique could certainly stand as proof of that profession because it was sheer perfection, and the hands roving his body certainly moved with confidence. At the moment he didn't care who or what Tex was, prostitute or cowboy, it was what they were about to do that had him firmly pushing away all negative thoughts and doubts in order to cling to his fantasy, which was now an effective tool for overcoming what had previously been an insurmountable obstacle. Immersing himself further into the role of Laredo, he wondered what provocative answer the highly paid prostitute would give the cowboy. He found himself speaking the honest-to-god truth, "I can't wait that long, Tex. I want you now."

With his eyes still closed from the heady kiss, Duo felt the cowboy disentangle himself and leave his side. Without the warm body to anchor him, the old familiar feeling of panic crept up on him. His eyes snapped open and he was instantly caught up by the sight of the naked, lean yet muscular body of the other man as he stepped out of the hot tub and went to his pants, folded on a nearby bench. Duo fleetingly wondered why he hadn't heard Tex enter the secluded area. His boots should have made some noise on the cobbled path - unless he'd taken them off. He decided very quickly that it didn't really matter how Tex came to be there, because at that moment every thought flew out of his head as the man turned around with a travel-size tube of lube and a condom in his hand, though that wasn't what held his attention. No, he only had eyes for the magnificent appendage jutting out from the nest of dark hair. The sight of the stiff member filled him with both fear and anticipation. Forcing himself to look away from that part of his anatomy, his gaze moved up that glorious body and locked with the cowboy's eyes. Deep blue pools of desire held his gaze as the man walked back to the hot tub and stepped down into the warm water again.

Tex proved to be a man of few words and a lot of action. After another round of hot and passionate kissing and fondling, Duo found himself lifted by strong arms, turned and carefully bent over the rim of the hot tub, exposing his entire backside. "I'm Laredo," he whispered to himself under his breath as he felt his old defenses rising up, urging him to scramble away from the man behind him and make a run for his clothes. _No!_ He firmly resolved. _I want this. I need this._

A slick finger teased and then invaded him, then worked at loosening the tight muscles. He relaxed as much as he was able, remembering Dorothy instructing him that preparation was essential. The thought came to him_, How would a professional courtesan respond? _He didn't have a whole lot of experience in being wanton or with sex; well, none at all considering he'd never actually done it before. He'd always been too afraid of the end result. But if there was one thing he was good at, it was having a vivid imagination. With his upper body resting on the warm wooden deck, he placed his face on his hands, folded beneath his cheek and did his best to relax. The faint odor of horse was in the air, and the not too distant whinny and snort helped Duo slip back into a his fantasy, of a world he'd only ever read about in books.

Laredo would be tired, having newly arrived from his journey from San Francisco. He could imagine himself walking into the foyer, dressed in an impeccable black suit over a white shirt and a bright yet tasteful neck scarf, his hat held over his chest by one hand, his valise secured in the other. He would pause to take stock of the large house, and even though he'd just arrived from the big, worldly city, he would still be impressed by the entry to his new home and workplace. No doubt a few employees at the house would welcome him, though others would probably wish him to the devil.

Duo grunted as another finger intruded. "All right?" the cowboy asked, his voice gruffer now as his other hand settled on his hip and began to stroke the wet skin beneath his palm.

"Just don't stop," he whispered. Duo knew that if Tex stopped now he might never get to this point again. As the stretching got to be a bit uncomfortable, he was glad he'd accepted the faux phallus from Dorothy. His assignment had been to lube and insert it twice a week, just to get used to the feel of something intruding into his body. It wasn't the most pleasurable experience, but he had faithfully executed his assignment with the hope that he would one day be in the very position he found himself in now. A thought began to form in the back of his mind, telling him that this wasn't right. He quickly squashed it. He wasn't about to let any doubts he might have ruin this moment.

Warm lips brushed against his back, and a tongue slowly traveled up his spine. "Ready?" Duo could tell by the slick hardness tapping against his hip, that Tex was more than ready to begin.

How would Laredo respond? Ah, yes, he'd say something like... "Show me what you've got, cowboy." His voice came out sounding thick with..., well, he hoped Tex would interrupt it as being sexy instead of frightened.

The moment he'd dreamed of since puberty had arrived quite suddenly as Tex filled him all at once. He gasped at the new intrusion, fists clutching against the uncomfortable feeling. Tex was certainly bigger than his practice phallus, and although he couldn't exactly say he was comfortable, it wasn't all that bad either. Thankfully, the dark haired stranger paused long enough for him to adjust and gather his wits. Shaken out of his daydream by the reality of the situation, it took all Duo's strength of will to keep from crawling up the edge of the hot tub and pulling himself off of the other man's hard length. He forced himself to stay where he was, determined not to succumb to his aunt's brainwashing, not now, when he'd gone farther than he ever had before.

And then the cowboy began to move. The first thing that came into Duo's mind was how different it felt having the real thing inside of him instead of a rubber simulated one. Oh yes, now this was more like it. His body jerked and a moan sounded from deep within him as Tex hit that sweet spot that Dorothy and every guy he'd seriously dated had talked about. The cowboy purposely pressed against it again, causing another pleasure-filled moan to escape his lips.

Duo rapidly lost himself to the rising tide of pleasure that the other man was bringing out of his body. He'd wanted this for so long and now that he'd gotten past the uncomfortable feeling of intrusion, it felt indescribably wonderful. Working in tandem with the man behind him, he pushed back to meet the cowboy's forward thrust. Good, so good, he thought, and the intense pleasure building inside of him was quickly becoming overwhelming. Not soon enough, a firm and blessedly talented hand slipped beneath him and sought to give him yet another kind of pleasure. After that, it was only a matter of minutes before he tumbled over the edge of completion and came with a long moan, his cum marking the edge of the hot tub.

Though his mind and body remained in a swirl of heady feelings, he was vaguely aware of the other man thrusting with abandon behind him. Suddenly, Tex stiffened and uttered a couple of incomprehensible words as he reached his climax as well. The man then collapsed on top of him, breathing heavily into his ear. Several moments passed before cowboy placed a brief kiss on his upturned cheek then began to slowly ease back, lifting his weight off of him and slipping out of his body with a hiss and a small gasp.

Unable to move yet, Duo remained bent over the edge of the hot tub, catching his breath. Then hands, strong yet gentle, carefully lifted him off the deck and ease his body back into the warm water. Two arms encircled his body, holding him comfortably against a warm and solid chest. "That was.... great," the dark haired cowboy said, still a bit breathless.

Duo could only nod his head in agreement, then choked out the words, "Thank you."

The deep chuckle next to his ear sounded sexy, and Duo wondered if this man was perfect not only in the looks department, but in everything else as well. He was a fantasy come true. He couldn't help but wonder if this man who had him seeing stars a moment ago had perfected his love-making skills before or after becoming a prostitute. Well, that was certainly something he couldn't ask. The arms holding his body shifted him again, and he was nothing short of putty in the cowboy's hands. His new position found him sitting across the cowboy's lap. He looked up, hoping to try to say something a little more intelligent, though before he could utter a word his mouth was captured again, kissed in such a way that any other form of communication was unthinkable.

This time the kiss was different. It was a slow and lazy kiss, and Duo found it just as wonderful as the more urgent kisses they'd shared earlier. He reciprocated in kind, grateful beyond words to this stranger for the gift he'd unknowingly given him. Duo felt wonderful, like a new man, one who had stepped away from a debilitating handicap and now had the ability to give what was necessary in a meaningful, long-term relationship.

When at last their lips parted, Duo looked up at the person who had just saved him from being a life-long virgin. His heart, already beating faster than normal, sped up from just gazing at the handsome face. Tex had to be the sexiest man he'd ever met.

Then the Adonis spoke. "I can get a key to one of the guest rooms on the third floor. How about we continue this up there? I'll order dinner and we'll spend the evening together, maybe even the night. Are you free?"

Duo blinked, forcing himself to remember that this wasn't a dream. The guy holding him was a prostitute, and more than willing to perform... for a fee. Oh shit, it hit him just exactly what he had done. Not only had he finally had sex and enjoyed it, but he'd done so with a complete stranger, a prostitute. Sure, Tex had used protection, but that diminish the fact that his first time was a rather tawdry affair. Shit, a prostitute. What had he been thinking? Doing his best to tuck away the distaste he felt from his own behavior, he knew he had to get out of there... and fast. As much as it pained him to lie, he had to get rid of the other man so he could sneak out of there and meet Hilde.

"Ah, yeah..., that sounds like a plan," he answered after a lengthy pause. "I'll just have to check with Jillian first."

Tex's eyebrows drew down for a moment, making him look at bit concerned, but then he nodded. The next few moments felt awkward, so Duo took the initiative and suggested, "Why don't you go upstairs and I'll join you after I freshen up." He was rather surprised how smooth the words flowed out of his mouth, given that he felt like he'd been choking while trying to get the lie out.

The other man sighed, seeming disappointed, but then Tex agreed to his request. "All right. But don't keep me waiting too long." Leaning over, the cowboy's lips brushed his teasingly, almost making him regret having to leave. "Amazing," he whispered against his lip before he pulled back to add, "Ask at the front desk for the room number." And then Tex reached up his hand to hold his chin, studying his face. Then with a smile he added in a sultry voice, "I'm going to have my fill of you tonight, Laredo." Then the cowboy kissed him again, giving him a taste of what awaited him in the upstairs room.

Once again Duo found himself unable to resist the man's kiss, but no sooner had he responded, it ended. Feeling disappointed and wanting more, he watched Tex climb unhurriedly out of the hot tub and stroll in all his naked glory across the deck to his clothing. The man leisurely toweled off his magnificent body, giving quite a show to his audience of one, then dressed with care, each movement sensual and deliberately provoking. Duo expected no less from a professional like Tex. Once dressed, the cowboy looked over his shoulder, winked at him and said, "Hurry."

Duo nodded. He would hurry all right. He was used to quickly obeying commands, seeing that Charise was a master at giving them. The moment the dark haired man disappeared down the garden path Duo rushed to get out of the water and quickly pull on the yellow robe he'd worn earlier. He waited a few moments, giving Tex enough time to exit the garden before he followed. Pushed by a desperate, almost panicked need to get the hell out of Dodge, so to speak, he tiptoed into the main building and retraced his steps to the spa, where he found his clothes neatly folded on the massage table. Once he was completely dressed and had his sunglasses back in place, he rushed though the house, careful to make sure that Tex wasn't anywhere in sight, heading straight for the front desk. He paused, ducking out of sight after seeing the cowboy standing there, speaking to a brunet that definitely wasn't Jillian. She handed him a key and assured him a meal would be sent up as soon as it was ready to be served, around five thirty. Duo checked his watch. It was only four o'clock. A lot could happen up in that room in an hour and a half, he thought. He shook his head. What was he thinking? He had to get the hell out of there.

He waited until Tex disappeared upstairs, then cautiously approached the desk himself. "Has Hilde come down yet?" he asked the pretty young brunet in a voice barely above a whisper.

"I saw her just a few minutes ago," the woman answered just as quietly, giving him a curious look. "She said she was going to get the horses ready."

With a brief word of thanks, Duo made for the front door. The only thing worse than lying, he figured, would be getting caught in the act. He resisted the urge to pull his damp braid out of the back of his shirt. Though it was uncomfortable having the thick rope of damp hair lying against his back, his braid was a sure giveaway to his identity should Tex take a look out of a window. Feeling embarrassed about what he'd just done and that he was ditching the man waiting for him upstairs, the last thing he wanted was to be recognized and have word of his tryst with a prostitute getting back to his boss or co-workers.

Hilde greeted him with a warm grin, though the heightened color on her cheeks showed that she was feeling embarrassed herself. Duo thought her romp upstairs with the mysterious Antonio seemed to have put an extra sparkle in her eyes. After they mounted their horses, well, because he was a bit sore he had to have a little help by way of a push before he managed it, they turned their horses and promptly began the journey to the path leading down the hillside.

Hilde pulled her horse up alongside his as they rode. "We probably shouldn't tell anyone at the ranch about how we spent the last hour. Agreed?"

"Definitely," he replied, and the relief he felt at the agreement was mirrored in his guide's pretty blue eyes.

When they reached the point where the trail would take them over the plateau's edge, Duo glanced over his shoulder at the house behind them, silently thanking the stranger who had helped him over the last hurdle of becoming a man, a man who now had more options open to him. Naturally, he felt some regret that he would probably never see Tex again, which was really too bad since the overwhelming sexual attraction he felt towards the cowboy was more than what he'd ever experienced with any the men he'd dated, even Trowa. Had they met under different circumstances, he and Tex might have dated, shared something more than just a brief encounter in a hot tub.

He shook himself, unhappy that he had been day dreaming again. It was time to stop woolgathering and get back to reality, he scolded himself. The fact was, he and Tex lived in very different worlds. They were never going to see each other again. Exhaling a resigned sigh, he turned his attention back to the steeply sloping trail and gave his horse free rein to follow Hilde's lead while he once again clung for dear life to the saddle horn.

During the hour and a half ride back to the ranch he envisioned the scene in the hot tub over and over again, wondering at his wantonness and feeling torn between being ashamed of his actions and elated by having finally conquered a fear that had held him hostage to loneliness for far too long. He had a feeling that his life was about to change, and that it was going to change for the better.

TBC

Note: Thanks for reviews and comments. All are appreciated. :D


	4. Chapter 4

**The Pretender  
Chapter 4**

Waking up the next morning, Duo had no idea which activity the day before had made sitting up so painful: horseback riding or having sex for the first time. He was pretty sure it was a combination of both. Feeling both stiff and sore, he took a couple of ibuprofen then dressed in black jeans and a white oxford shirt, deeming his clothing casual enough for Charise's working-vacation dress standards. Despite his physical discomfort, Duo found himself smiling at his reflection in the bathroom mirror after brushing his teeth. For the life of him he couldn't seem to keep the smile off his face.

He'd done it. He'd actually had sex.

He was finally liberated from the heavy mantle of fear and guilt his aunt had placed on him, trying to keep him from what she deemed a life of perversion. Of course he wasn't entirely free from all feelings of guilt. He felt pretty bad about leaving Tex as he had, waiting for him in an upstairs bedroom, anticipating his company for the night. It couldn't be helped, he consoled himself. He wasn't anything like the forward, sexually indulgent person the handsome man believed him to be. He wasn't Laredo. That persona, fueled by his vivid imagination, had served its purpose by helping him have sex with a virtual stranger. But Laredo was only a fantasy, and now with a full workday ahead of him, he had to be firmly anchored to reality. He had a great job, a cool apartment, a boss who depended on him and friends who cared. Leaving Tex like he had was probably the rudest, most cowardly thing he'd ever done, especially after what they'd done together, but Duo didn't regret parting ways before the man learned of his deception.

Thinking about the day before another thought came to him. What would Charise think of him if she ever learned he'd had sex at the brothel up the hill from her ranch? No doubt her first reaction would be shock. After calming down, she'd scold him until his ears burned for acting so carelessly and being irresponsible, then she probably skewer him with the look of disappointment he hated being on the receiving end of.

His boss was, at times, his friend and confidant, and she knew something about his intimacy problems, so she might even be happy for him that he'd passed that enormous hurdle, but she definitely frowned on things she considered debasing. The woman made no secret about her views on pornography, prostitution or adultery. She was no Bible thumper, far from it, but she personally felt those things to be detrimental to healthy relationships. Charise would know about building a strong relationship, Duo figured. She'd been married once, and it was_ "A love match beyond compare_", she'd say to anyone who cared to listen. Seven years ago, her "darling Harry", husband of twenty years, died in a scuba diving accident off the coast of Australia while they were on vacation together. Charise had been so devastated by his sudden death and the loss of her once-in-a-lifetime love, that for the first time in her life she couldn't bring herself to care about anything. Following her doctor's orders, she'd taken a year off work to mourn him and pull herself together. Duo felt like he knew Harry DuFrame, as Charise spoke often and fondly of the man, and always with tears filling her eyes.

Because she'd been lucky enough to have known true love, a good and loving relationship was what Charise wanted for him also, which is one of the reasons why she would be so upset about his having sex with a prostitute. A brothel was probably the last place she would have expected him to lose his virginity. She would definitely be disappointed in him if she learned the truth. That was why, no matter what, he couldn't tell her about Tex, not how they met, what the man did for a living and definitely not what they'd done together.

Studying his reflection, he turned his head and looked at his face from all angles, wondering if he looked any different after having had great sex. He was pretty sure the blush that popped up on his cheeks every time he thought about being in the hot tub with the cowboy was a clear give away that something had changed. It wouldn't do to have Charise or his co-workers question him about his flushed face, that might lead to other questions he wasn't about to answer. The problem was, he couldn't stop thinking of Tex and recreating in his mind the scene in the hot tub. The only solution was to keep his thoughts occupied with other things, like the busy day ahead of him. But damn, dismissing the cowboy might prove nearly impossible when the memory of those deep blue eyes and the teasing tilt of Tex's lips was something he wasn't quite ready to let go of .

--------------

Ten minutes before the morning meeting was scheduled to begin, Duo in his place, alone, in the conference room. He had just opened his laptop when a familiar voice called out to him from the doorway. "Duo!" Charise walked into the room where her design team met daily. "There you are. I didn't see you at breakfast."

"Morning, Charise," he replied calmly, purposely keeping his eyes to the screen as it came to life. "I wasn't hungry this morning."

"You should have been. You missed dinner last night. Was the horseback ride too much for you?"

Charise knew he hadn't ridden before, so she must know that he was sore. But her concern was laced with a touch of teasing. Rather than tell her he'd been soaking his sore arse in the whirlpool bathtub all evening, dreaming of a dark haired cowboy, he stretched the truth. "I was feeling a bit achy, so I decided to take a long bath and watch some T.V. in my room. You more or less ordered me to relax and have some fun this week, and that's exactly what I did last night."

"The horseback ride wasn't relaxing?" she asked, moving to stand behind his chair.

"It was very nice, though a bit long for my first time in the saddle." That wasn't the only "first" he'd experienced yesterday, he thought with a internal snicker.

"Well, I suppose you'll be happy about getting back to your apartment tomorrow."

"I have to shop for the week and a mountain of laundry to do on Sunday," he admitted.

"All work and no play will make my Duo a very lonely boy," Charise said, concern in her voice as her hands came to rest on his shoulders and began massaging them.

"I can't help it you are a tireless task master," he teased, then turned the tables on her. "When do _you_ make time for anything other than business?"

The hands on his shoulders stopped moving as the older woman thought about the question. "I guess I don't. I can't remember the last time I had a date or went to the movies, at least one that wasn't a premiere where my presence was deemed necessary for publicity. Do you happen to know of any straight, handsome, decent, older and self supporting men, Duo?" Charise then sighed deeply and added, "I'm beginning to think they're a dying breed."

He grinned at her over his shoulder. "Not too picky, are you?"

"One has to be, when it come to matters of the heart." She smiled softly in return, though there was a wistful look in her eyes. He got the message that Charise was ready to move on, past her grief for her deceased husband. But there was still a part of her that held onto Harry, and probably always would.

"I'll be on the lookout," Duo assured her, placing his hands over hers, which were still resting on his shoulders. "And you do the same for me, minus the straight requirement. I'm thinking that if we can find someone to occupy your evenings and weekends, the rest of us will get to work a regular 40-hour week." He was teasing, but not. His own social life was nearly non-existent due to the long hours spent at the office and then often spending part of his weekends helping Charise with some of her personal business or escorting her to fashion industry events. Hell, he was often so wiped out at the end of the day that it was a chore to fix dinner and a rare night when he watched T.V. What free time he had on the weekends, his body usually demanded he make up for his lack of sleep by taking long naps or sleeping half the day away.

"We've got a deal," Charise agreed with a feminine chuckle. Moving to the chair at the head of the table, she sat down and set her briefcase on the flat surface. It took a few moments for her to pull out the reports and files she needed that morning.

After laying them on top of the table, she glanced up at her assistant once again and thoughtfully studied him for a moment. A slow smile tilted the corner's of her mouth as she observed, "You are absolutely glowing this morning, Duo. I think the fresh country air must agree with you. You have the look of someone who just got laid." But after Duo failed to respond to her teasing, her humor suddenly waned.

He was mortified. How did she know? What if everyone else could read him like his boss had? Damn, he wasn't that obvious, was he?

Charise was quick to apologize, believing she'd offended him. "I'm so sorry, Duo. That was tactless of me. I..." She stopped short, sensing she was digging herself in deeper with every word uttered. "Anyway, what I meant to say was that you look more delicious than usual." She waited until he looked up and smiled, letting her know that all was forgiven, before she relaxed.

"Now, let's hope that my highly paid staff has come up with some fantastic ideas for the Spring Fling." No more than ten seconds passed before said fortunate staff began to trickle into the room. After a brief greeting, they took their seats.

Duo stayed busily occupied for the remainder of his stay at the ranch, leaving him little time to think about Tex. On Saturday morning , in a rented limo, he returned to the small airport in Lake Tahoe, along with Charise and several favored employees, where they boarded DuFrame Design's private plane and flew back to L.A. The other staff members would find their way home in the cars they'd driven up or one a commercial airliners, their tickets provided by Charise.

Unlocking the front door to his apartment, Duo stepped in carrying his three bags, relieved at being back in his own living space. From habit he re-locked the front door then took his luggage to the bedroom. He set everything down and removed his light jacket and stretched out his arms. Deciding to deal with unpacking later, he grabbed up his phone and speed dialed Dorothy. She'd given him her cell phone number in case he had needed of her while he was out of town.

She picked up just as he sat on his. "How was your trip?" she asked, without bothering to say hello. He knew she had caller id, but would it kill her to greet him properly?

Putting aside his slight irritation, he answered triumphantly, "I did it." With a smile on his face and phone in his hand, he flopped back onto the mattress.

There was a moment a silence followed as Dorothy digested what he'd said. "Define, exactly, what 'it' is."

"I had sex with another man."

He could imagine Dorothy smiling, her straight, pearly-white teeth exposed as she replied excitedly, "Tell me all about it. Was it good?"

Duo grinned back. Leave it to a sex therapist not to ask the who, what, where, when or why questions that he was sure to get from Quatre or anyone else he told of his newest achievement. "It was better than good. It was fantastic. I know you and everyone else told me it would be, but I really didn't expect it to be so... fulfilling the first time."

"You didn't panic?"

"No, but I felt like it a couple of times. I caught myself and used the escape technique you taught me, and it was hot." Now that he was talking about the incident, he found it hard to stop when he had such an eager and understanding listener. "You know I was going to Charise's ranch, right? Well, she arranged for me to go on a horseback ride, and my guide took me to a big yellow house cut into a hillside called The House.."

"On the Hill." Dorothy finished for him and then laughed. "Oh, Duo. Don't tell me you had your virginity taken in a whore house?"

Duo wondered why she was so amused. "Who said I was taken?"

Dorothy's amusement continued as she asked, "What else have we been preparing you for? Isn't that what you wanted?"

"I also want to experience being on top," he protested. He knew his former boyfriends, usually the strong, handsome and dominant type, had made no secret about how they wanted to take him. Since he always went for that kind of guy he should be willing to give them what they needed, or so he thought. But that didn't mean he'd be content to be a bottom every time. If his first time having sex revealed anything about him, it was that he wasn't adverse to being a bottom. His friends and therapists had told him most guys are either top or bottom, but he figured he wouldn't know for certain what he preferred until he tried both.

"And now that you've taken this first step, you will. Tell me, who was this miracle man? A professional?"

"He was dressed like a cowboy." He could feel his face flushing at the mere mention of Tex.

"Ah, that's perfect. You've always been partial towards men in tight jeans and chaps."

Without going into as much detail as she wanted, Duo told her what had happened between himself and Tex and was getting aroused describing that afternoon. He rubbed the swelling at the front of his pants as he finished telling her how the other man had held and kissed him afterwards. A lovely gesture, but unfortunately it was soured by his having fled the scene while Tex, ignorant of his departure, waited for him in his room upstairs.

"So, did he work there or not?" Dorothy asked, sounding confused.

"Honestly? I don't know, but I assumed he did. He had a room up stairs, after all. Besides, this guy kissed exactly the way he looked. He was perfection personified."

"Then you got his services for free?"

Duo's eyes widened. The thought that he'd stiffed the man who'd done so much for him had never even entered his mind, and he was horrified by his actions, even though his thoughtlessness had been unintended. "Shit," he answered, wide eyed. "I didn't even think to pay."

Dorothy thought about that for a moment, then suggested, "You can always send them a cashier's check, or an envelope of money, explaining your hasty retreat as embarrassment, not an intended slight."

Duo nodded distractedly, thinking about that. It was bad enough that he'd run off and left Tex waiting for him upstairs, but to leave without paying for services rendered was stealing from the man. Tex had to have felt cheated and insulted. He decided then and there to write a note of apology to Tex and send him five hundred dollars. Was that enough? He had no idea and no one to ask without a lot of explanations. Surely Dorothy wouldn't know how much prostitutes from that particular establishment charged for a life-altering, half-hour quicky.

"So what are your plans?" Dorothy's question cut into his thoughts.

"What do you mean?" His mind was still focused on sending money to Tex.

"Are you going to start dating again?"

"Oh," he blinked, not realizing they'd changed topics. "I guess that's the next step, isn't it?" he replied. "I just have to find the time to get out and meet someone. Now that I've gotten over my issues, I'm free to start looking for the man of my dreams."

Even though Dorothy wasn't in the room, looking at him with that penetrating stare of hers, the one that made him squirm in his chair, the long pause from her end of the phone somehow made him feel like she was examining him under a microscope.

"I'm not so certain you should consider your "issues" to be over," she finally said, her tone thoughtful. "You've definitely made progress, but there is a latent reason for your phobia. That reason hasn't gone away, as far as I know, but you have just successfully gotten around it. Dr. Winner, I hope, is helping you deal with that aspect of your mental health." After taking a deep breath, she added, "Now, as for moving forward, I would suggest that you begin putting your toes into the proverbial gay waters by going out next weekend. I've got a few connections and can get you into the Palomino Club. They have a higher class of clientele, mostly business professionals, who I'm confident will welcome you with open arms."

Duo suddenly became anxious at her suggestion of going into a gay club alone, especially the exclusive one Dorothy suggested. Of course he'd patronized them before, during his college years, but those nights didn't hold the most pleasant memories. Too much had been expected of him by the guys he'd met in those loud and dark establishments. Even the few decent guys he'd given his cell phone number to had expected him to have sex with them after the first or second date. He'd disappointed quite a few hopefuls and earned the reputation as a cock tease when he couldn't go any further than making out.

"I haven't been to a club in years. Are you sure that's the best place for me to go?"

"Absolutely. If it will make you feel better, I could meet you there. It's not safe these days to go any where alone, especially in the city."

Duo frowned. "I don't need you to hold my hand, Dorothy."

"I know that. I just thought you might feel more comfortable walking into a new place with someone."

"I don't think walking into a gay club with a woman on my arm is going to help my cause," he replied.

"I could bring a date?"

"Then I'd look like I was in a threesome, and that's definitely not the impression I want to give when looking for a date. I think I'm better off doing this by myself."

Dorothy thought about this a moment then sighed. "As long as you promise me that you'll actually go to the club and stay for at least an hour. And don't go alone. I'd never forgive myself if something happened to you."

He wondered why the woman was so paranoid about his going out alone? Hell, he'd been on his own for nearly a year since Trowa's departure, and nothing had happened to make him as exercise the kind of caution Dorothy was asking of him. Maybe something had happened to spur her concern. He really should take the time to watch the news, get caught up on currents, especially if we was going to start dating again. The problem was he was either at work on asleep when the evening news came on.

"I have to stay an hour, huh?" Duo pondered that for a moment, then nodded his head. "All right. I can do an hour."

"We're making real progress here, Duo." The therapist sounded pleased. "I'm so proud of you. I have every confidence that you're on the way to having the relationship you've been wanting for so long."

Duo grinned. "Hum... a hot and heavy romance."

"Maybe more than one, two or ten," Dorothy replied. "The possibilities are endless."

There was that churning in his stomach again. Something about the blonde's insinuation that he could have a string of lovers just didn't sit right. He initially began seeing Dorothy because he was sick of being alone and dumped for someone who had more to offer, physically, to a relationship. Frankly, he had been desperate to overcome his fears so that he could finally enjoy a full-fledged relationship with another man. He'd always been selective about who he let into his life, and had been cautious about who he confided in with regards to his intimacy problem. Those few had initially promised to be patient as he tried to work out his issues, but none of them had been able to wait long enough to enjoy the end result of his therapy.

Trowa had been the last to leave him. And though he'd told Quatre that he was over that defection, he really wasn't. Since their breakup, he'd been afraid to let anyone else get close to him. His fear of rejection and of being abandoned had been earned the hard way, by a history of heartbreak and letdowns.

As his conversation with Dorothy drew to a close, Duo promised to look for the tickets she'd be sending to his apartment for the Palomino Club, and that he'd call her the morning after his visit to the club to report on his evening.

Work was frantic the next week. Duo's day at the office began at 6 a.m., and lasted well after 9 p.m. He returned home, too tired to eat and with barely enough energy to throw off his clothes and fall into bed. He cancelled his appointment with Quatre and his weekly racketball game with Trowa with the legitimate excuse that he was just too busy to leave the office. With the winter fashion show taking place that weekend, he found very little time to dwell on Tex much less anything else regarding his sex life.

A note from Dorothy arrived by messenger on Thursday afternoon. It included two tickets to the trendy club she'd spoken of the weekend before. With so much on his mind, Duo had actually forgotten about it. He took a moment to study the invitations before placing them in his wallet; he had too much going on at the moment to even think about using them. It looked like his love life would have to take the back burner, at least until after the show on Saturday.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

**The Pretender  
Chapter 5**

Saturday evening marked the end of L.A.'s fashion week, culminating with shows featuring the west coast's top designers. The day had been frantic at times yet ended with a standing ovation and Charise taking a bow in front of an enthusiastic and, hopefully, buying audience. There were a few snags before the show, namely two wardrobe malfunctions, a missing suit, a model's hair catastrophe, and a misplaced accessory. A constant at Charise's side, Duo helped her to calm the models, correct the problems and sending the models wearing her garments onto the runway. He lost count of how many times he'd run to the coffee truck. And of course, a successful show was followed by a blowout after party. Celebrities, wealthy patrons as well as colleagues, personal friends of Charise's, many of her peers in the fashion industry and the show's models all joined together to congratulate the famous designer on her newest collection.

He finally managed to slip away from the party around ten p.m., feeling incredibly good about having helped pull off yet another successful show. Instead of going home to his apartment and hitting the sack, mostly because he was too wired up to sleep, Duo decided to burn off a little of that excess energy by making use of the tickets Dorothy had sent to him. He'd use one tonight and if he liked the Palomino or met someone interesting there, he'd save the second pass for another time. Since the passes were neatly tucked into his wallet and the club was conveniently located only a few blocks down from the posh hotel where Charise was holding her party, now seemed the perfect opportunity to check out the place out.

A brief glance into a store window confirmed that the sharp-looking suit he wore, one that Charise had designed specifically for him, fit his body to perfection. He looked good, if he did say so himself, and coupled with the night's success he felt confident enough to venture into the gay club alone. He loosened his tie as he walked along the city street, nodding to those passing by who also looked to be enjoying a night on the town.

Much to his delight the club was situated in a nice section of town and the building appeared to have been recently remodeled. Unlike the clubs he'd visited as a teenager, with dim-lit windowless facades and a single door entry, the front of the Palomino was artfully illuminated, with a large front window and tall double doors framed in mahogany. The encased glass was frosted with images of horses running through water, giving privacy to the club's patrons from curious pedestrians passing by. It was the classiest gay club Duo had ever seen. He could only guess how much the membership fees must be and knew it was probably more than he could afford.

With one hand in his pant's pocket he tried his best to appear at ease as he strolled into the entrance foyer, where he was immediately greeted by a tall and handsome older man dressed in a suit almost as impressive as his own. The man's head was completely shaved, but the dark brown eyebrows suggested what color his hair might have been in his younger years. The man politely welcomed him to the Palomino Club and asked for his membership card. Duo reached for his wallet and presented one of the two guest cards and received a brief nod from the greeter.

"Follow me, please," said the man before he promptly turned and walked down a small corridor, leaving Duo to follow. Stopping in front of the first door they came to, the tall man opened it for him and then stood to the side to allow Duo to pass through. "Enjoy," he said with a pleasant though not toothy grin. As he passed the man on his way though the door, Duo thought he could feel the man's eyes following him. A quick glance confirmed the guy was staring at his ass. On second thought, it could be his shoes the man was openly ogling, which wasn't surprising. After all, they were his favorite dress shoes and had been hand crafted in Italy. Which ever of the two had captured the doorman's attention, Duo decided to take his appreciative stare as a compliment.

"I will, thanks," he replied over his shoulder, then promptly dismissed the man from his mind as the door closed behind him and he was left to survey the room before him. The walls, he noted, were covered by expensive embossed wallpaper, the color resembling a soft green patina and adorned only by bronze sconces, wood wainscoting and crown molding. Both masculine and stylish, he thought. The room itself was longer than it was wide and the bar along the far wall was a mixture of bronze metal and polished mahogany. He was pleased to note that the sconces gave off just enough light for him to easily view everyone in the room, most of which were men dressed in business suits. The hum of male voices combined with the soft jazz music playing in the background presented a pleasant atmosphere, giving him a hopeful feeling that he might actually enjoy himself tonight. The club's ambiance helped ease some of the residual tension in his shoulders, and he was sure that after a drink he might begin to relax from the stressful day. Looking more closely now at the other men in the room, his confidence began to grow. He could handle businessmen, seeing as how he dealt with them five days of the week.

Moving more confidently now, he approached the bar and waved to get the attention of the attractive, muscular-looking bartender, who happened to be dressed just as nicely as the rest of the men in the bar. When the man answered his summons, Duo ordered a Manhattan. He didn't want to chance getting tipsy around a bunch of strangers, so his plan for tonight was to slowly nurse one drink while checking out the bar's patrons. During the next twenty minutes, several mature men, some even with graying hair, approached and initiated conversation with him, but he honestly wasn't interested in older men. To his relief, they were quick to catch on to his disinterest and left him to his drink, no doubt continuing their hunt for someone else while the night was still young.

After a while a faint pulsing sound caught his attention, and Duo recognized it as the reverberations of a bass guitar. He looked for the source but was unable to pinpoint its location. He motioned for the waiter again and asked where the music was coming from.

"The dance floor is behind that door," the blond, strikingly handsome bartender replied, nodding towards the far end of the room. Sure enough, to the right of the bar he spotted a thin rectangular cut into the wall, a doorknob set in the rich brown wainscoting. Until it was pointed out to him, Duo hadn't seen the door at all.

"Can I go in there on a guest pass?" He hoped he could because standing around the bar was not his idea of a great time. He never had liked the bar scene, and the last half hour brought back to mind the reason he felt that way.

"Of course," the bartender replied with a warm smile. "If you get past the front door, the entire club is at your disposal. There are billiards upstairs, a cigar room adjacent to it, as was well as a lounge and game room. We have a full service gym with saunas and showers."

"Sounds great," said Duo. Finishing off the last of his drink, he left the empty glass on the bar and walked towards the nearly invisible door, nodding and saying hello to those who made eye contact with him. After opening the door, he was surprised to find that it didn't immediately lead to the dance area at all, but to a small corridor that led to yet another door, opposite from where he stood. The space appeared to be a sound buffer between the bar and dance area. With the music almost audible now, he crossed the short distance and pushed opened the matching door, finding himself in a slightly darker room that was alive with dance music. He was moderately surprised to find once again that, like the rest of the club, this room was different from what he'd expected. The dance clubs he'd visited before had been dark and overly loud with dance music and people trying to talk above it. The Palomino's highly polished wooden dance floor was not overly populated, yet had enough people dancing to make the room feel anything but empty. The lights overhead were soft, illuminating but not glaringly so, unlike the wildly pulsing strobe lights that were the norm in other clubs. Along the walls were at least two dozen semi-circled booths, all facing the dance floor; to his right, a long bar with a line of stools, most of which were occupied.

At his entrance, quite a few heads turned his way. Being the center of attention was something Duo was used to, especially when he accompanied Charise, but he couldn't really say he was comfortable with it, but then he would never be accused of trying to hide himself either. Having a braid the length of a yard stick and clothed daily in designer threads that were perfectly tailored to his body, pretty much make him a walking billboard advertising DuFrame Designs and garnered him a lot of attention. Confident that he looked his best tonight, he held his head high and strolled to the bar where he ordered a cherry cola, having already had his one alcoholic drink limit for the night. Over the tall, cold rim of the tumbler his eyes scanned the room to see if there was anything or anyone interesting.

His eyes, as always, searched out men who had dark hair, a physical trait he found appealing. He couldn't explain his attraction to darker haired men, there was no real reason for that preference. Sure, he could appreciate the beauty of someone who was, say... blond or redheaded, but those shades just didn't turn him on. Take Quatre, for instance. The man was a natural blond and good looking, too, but he never felt any sexual attraction to him. He guessed he just wasn't drawn to men unless they had very dark hair. Trowa had been the one exception. His former boyfriend had glossy auburn colored hair, almost red in the sunlight.

"Duo Maxwell?" a hauntingly familiar voice called out from behind him, jolting him out of his thoughts of Trowa. Turning, he held back a groan as his eyes lit on the last person he'd hope to see. It was none other than his former boyfriend, Wufei Chang. Their brief relationship hadn't ended well. No, not well at all.

"Hello, Wufei," he answered as politely as he could manage as the Chinese man closed the distance between them. As the ebony haired man stepped to his side, he couldn't help but note the man was as handsome as ever but that his smile had retained that haughty slant that Duo had come to hate when they'd dated.

Unexpectedly, Wufei embraced him like a long lost lover, of which Duo technically had never been, and then he stepped back to say, "It's good to see you, Duo. How have you been?"

Duo gave the man a closer look, trying to figure out what the other man was up to. Wufei was dressed in an expensively cut suit, dark gray by the looks of it with a matching satin shirt. It looked nice in contrast to his shoulder length, straight glossy black hair. His ice blue tie provided the only splash of color. The Chinese man looked even better than he had six years ago, and from what he'd heard, he was a successful stockbroker working for a prodigious financial group.

Feeling an arm slip around his shoulders, Duo was reminded of the reason why their fledgling relationship hadn't lasted more than a couple of weeks; Wufei found the concept of fidelity hard to adhere to. Even though he and Duo never had sex, they had gotten close rather quickly. They had met while in college, seeing each other several nights a week; enjoying meals together, watching a movie or having a night on the town. Wufei had all the moves. He flirted like nobody's business, kissed like sin, and courted like Casanova. Duo thought they had something good going on only to realize after a month of dating that Wufei had something better going on the side, several in fact. Though he'd never regretted the abrupt end of their relationship, Duo had thought about the Chinese man every now and then, though mostly about his delicious body. And from the way the man's suit fit, it was easy to see Wufei had kept himself in top shape.

"I'm good, Wufei. Real good," Duo replied, smiling at the other man. "I've heard you're working for some big shot financial group. If that suit you're wearing is any indication, business is good."

The dark eyes sparkled with delight. "That it is, but I could say the same about you. I thought you were hot before, Duo, but seeing you in person after all this time, I have to say you've surpassed even my fondest memories. Can I buy you a drink, ask you to dance or just drag you home with me?"

"I've got a drink, thanks, but a dance might be nice."

Wufei took the drink out of his hand and set it on the bar, preparatory to leading him onto the dance floor. Even though the music was fast enough in tempo to dance separately, the Chinese man enfolded him into his arms, careful not to snag the long braid, and began a seductively slow dance.

"Up to your old games, Wufei?" Duo asked with a chuckle.

"I'd like to think I've learned a few new ones. Just say the word and I'll be happy to share it all with you. I take it you're here alone?"

"Yes."

"Seeing anyone seriously?"

"No," Duo answered with a shake of his head. "My last boyfriend dumped me for my shrink, so I've been a bit... cautious about dating again." He couldn't help but wonder what Tex would say to that remark. He sure hadn't been cautious in that hot tub, where they'd shared more than polite conversation. Thoughts of that day began to stir up the desire for a repeat performance. He studied Wufei again, thinking it would be nice to be naked and pressed up against the other man's body, which even in college had been sculpted from years of perfecting several types of martial arts.

"Ouch!" the man said with an exaggerated wince. "He left you for your shrink? Shit, that had to hurt." The leaning forward to press his cheek against Duo's, Wufei said into his hear, "Bet I could make you forget all about him." He heard Wufei breath in deeply, and then he said, "You smell positively delicious. Tell me, have you gotten over your... hangups?" There was a hint of anticipation in Wufei's voice as he asked that question.

"Pretty much." Remembering Dorothy's words of caution, Duo wasn't one hundred percent confident that he was cured, but he was going to practice what Quatre termed positive mapping. Basically described, it entailed picturing a desired outcome in his mind and believing it could happen. Positive mapping had been part of his therapy for the past couple of months. Dorothy had a similar yet cruder way of saying the same thing. Perhaps applying that tactic now could help him enjoy a very satisfying tryst with his former boyfriend. If nothing else, Wufei was pleasing to the eye, experienced in bed, and he felt he could trust Wufei... well, maybe for one night. He couldn't envision them going any further than that.

"How about you? Are you with anyone?"

"Not at the moment."

After a moment, the corners of Wufei's lips turned up and his eyes took on a look of appreciation. "Damn, Duo, I'd forgotten about your incredible eyes. You can make a man hard by just staring into them." And to prove it, Wufei's hands cupped his bottom and pressed their lower bodies together so that Duo could feel the undeniable evidence of his claim. "There's a room in the back we could use. You know, to get reacquainted."

For some reason Wufei's suggestion was like a bucket of cold water being thrown on him, cooling down any sexual reaction he'd been having towards Wufei. He took a mental step back to ask himself, _Is this what I really want, to have sex in the back room of a club I've never been in before? _What was he thinking? He hadn't seen Wufei in years, and yet within five minutes the other man was propositioning him. What did that say about the man. A tiger can't change his stripes, and Wufei would probably never stop being a player. Why would he want to be with the man, even for the evening? In the back of his head came the question, _But isn't this why you've come here in the first place? To have some fun, let loose and make up for lost time?_ The familiar tug of war that he'd dealt with for most of his life was back again. Sensing that Wufei was waiting for an answer, he swallowed with some difficulty before suggesting, "Why don't we get reacquainted out here on the dance floor first, and then we'll see."

One black eyebrow rose in question, but then slowly settled back down to align with its twin. "Very well," Wufei agreed, though it looked like he had just sucked on a very sour lemon. No, the man was not pleased at all. "Tell me, what are you doing now, job wise?"

"I'm the personal assistant to Charise DuFrame," he rushed to say, relieved to have a bit more time to settle the debate going on in his head. "We just finished L.A.'s fashion week and the show for her spring and summer fashions for next year took place this evening. Being that it was such a huge success, I thought I'd celebrate by coming here tonight."

"Are you a member of the club?" Wufei asked, loosening the hold that had kept their pelvises pressed together. "I don't think I've seen you here before." It was becoming obvious that his interest in him was diminished by the mundane conversation.

"No. A friend of mine gave me a couple of passes to see if I'd be interested. This is my first visit."

A grin broke out on Wufei's face. Duo wasn't sure, but it had an almost predatory look to it. He began to think that maybe he was being looked at as fresh meat on the market. A glance around the room showed him that he and his dance partner were still being observed by the others. Even the eyes of those making out with their partners on the dance floor stole furtive glances their way. He suddenly felt exposed and very uncomfortable. He'd have to be careful to ease his way out of this situation or there was the possibility of an ugly scene in the making.

"Do you think we could sit and talk for a bit?"

Wufei pulled back, surprised by the request. "Ah... sure. Follow me." Taking Duo's hand, he led the him to the side of the room to an empty, circular booth. After sitting down, Duo immediately felt better, no longer the center of attention.

"So, tell me more about your job and your life, Duo."

With the Chinese man giving him his full attention, Duo told him of his years after college. How he'd worked his way quickly from a minor role in Charise's company to being her assistant, a demanding job that paid insanely well. While he spoke, Wufei's fingers caressed the top of his hand, which was resting on the tabletop. Before long, his hand slid away and disappeared beneath the table and began to kneed his thigh, moving steadily closer to his crotch.

Duo's pulse was racing by that time, but more from agitation than Wufei's attempts to seduce him. Something about this whole situation bothered him. An uncomfortable feeling had been building with each passing moment, setting off alarms in his mind. He almost bit his tongue as he asked, "How about you, Wufei? Are you still working out every day?"

"Six days a week," Wufei answered before leaning over his to let his lips begin a teasing assault on Duo's neck. "My stamina has always been good, but now it's even better."

Of course the man was alluding to his sexual prowess, which served to put Duo off even more. As Wufei moved to capture his not-so-pliant lips, the braided man tried to examine his confusion. Wufei was definitely eager and willing, so why was he being so critical, finding fault with everything the other man said and did. Why was he so put off by the man? The kiss became even more demanding, and despite his reasons for being there that night, Duo instinctively jerked back when a sure hand slid over his clothed, barely interested member. "Don't," was all he could manage to say in response to his sudden revulsion.

Wufei looked confused for a moment, then his dark eyes narrowed and where moments before they had been filled with desire, anger now flashed in the dark orbs. "What? Don't tell me you've changed your mind?" he snapped angrily. The look of anger quickly turned to condemnation. "I should have known you hadn't changed. You were always a cock tease, Duo, looking like a wet dream come to life and as frigid as the North Pole. Take my advice and get a refund from that shrink of yours. He took more than your boyfriend, he took you to the bank, therapy wise." Wufei slid out of the booth and paused a moment to derisively add, "It's no wonder your last boyfriend fell for someone else. A man's cock would wither and dry up before you're over your hang ups. God, you're a pathetic tease."

With that parting comment, the Chinese man stalked off towards the bar where he would no doubt tell the others congregated there all about the cock tease. Mortified, Duo sat there for a moment, desperately struggling to gather his wits about him. After collecting what remained of his dignity, he slid out of the booth and walked with his head held up as high he could muster under the circumstances and headed towards the door. He forced himself to walk rather than run, fighting the desperate urge to get out of there as quickly as possible. His face was burning and he figured it must be crimson from the embarrassment he felt. Hailing a cab, he returned to his apartment, thinking to lock himself inside for as long as it took to get over this latest bout of humiliation.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**The Pretender  
Chapter 6**

Duo hibernated in his apartment the next day, still feeling the sting of humiliation resulting from the disaster at the Palomino Club the night before. He felt completely justified, however, in stopping Wufei from going further in his attempt to seduce him when the whole encounter began to feel wrong. He should have knocked the guy on his ass, but he couldn't risk any negative backlash that might affect his job or reflect badly on DuFrame Designs.

His sour mood made the day seem endless, until about three that afternoon when he decided he had better call Dorothy and confess to her what had happened before she heard about it from anyone else. After all, he figured she must have some connections at the club, seeing that she had the means to acquire guest passes.

After telling the woman about his less than stellar visit to the Palomino, it really didn't come as much of a surprise when Dorothy assured him he'd acted appropriately to Wufei's less than welcomed advances, and that the old adage, 'When in doubt, do without' was more than apt for the situation. He felt marginally better after she reminded him that he hadn't seen Wufei in a couple of years, and he wasn't likely to run into him anytime soon. He could only hope he would be so lucky.

By the time Monday morning rolled around he was feeling a bit better and able to enter the workplace with a smile, ready to meet the challenges of the day. Yet instead of receiving the usual greetings of relief and celebration that followed the end of a successful show, the overall atmosphere at DuFrame Designs was ominously tense. A strange, foreboding silence hung in the air. Something was definitely wrong. He hurried to his office, bypassing the coffee room and his usual cappuccino fix.

Emily Harris, the stylish, forty-ish head of advertising, was nervously pacing in front of the closed door to Charise's office. Despite her cheery winter white pantsuit, her face was pale and drawn and lined with worry. "What's going on?" Duo asked, causing the thin brunet to jump in surprise. She'd seemed to have been so caught up in her thoughts that she'd failed to notice his entrance.

Emily turned and her eyes widened with relief. "Duo, thank goodness you're here. Charise is beside herself and she's been asking for you. You better go in armed."

"What's happened, Emily?" he asked as he picked up his note pad and pen, then placed up his glasses on his and slid them to the end of his nose. He was now ready to go to work.

The woman continued to look troubled as she shook her head, her shoulder length hair sweeping her shoulders. "Harrison Huffington has accused Charise of stealing his designs. She was served with a Cease and Desist order this morning, stating that she can't sell her designs from the show until the matter is settled in court. This could cost Charise her reputation and all of us our jobs," she added with growing alarm, her face looking even paler than before.

"You can't for a minute believe that Charise would stoop to stealing anyone else's designs, nor would she have the opportunity," he replied, upset that his co-worker could suggest that their boss would do such a thing. "I'm with her most of her waking hours, and believe me, we barely have time for lunch must less skulking around another designer's drawing room."

Emily had the decency to look embarrassed by her momentary lapse of faith in Charise. "I know she wouldn't steal from anyone, you're right. It's just that she was so upset this morning. It's unsettling, seeing her so distressed."

Duo gave the woman a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "Why don't you go back to your office and try to figure out how to spin this with the press. After Charise has calmed down, I'm sure she's going to want to consult with you about a response." He nodded his head towards Charise's office. "I think I should get in there and see what I can do to help."

"Good luck," she said, and with apparent reluctance she turned and slowly left the room . Duo hoped Emily could pull herself together, and soon. The last thing Charise needed in a crisis situation was to have panicked employees underfoot.

Taking a deep breath before entering her office, Duo steeled himself for Charise at her manic worst. His prediction of her mood was confirmed the moment he inched the door open. His usually composed boss was in the middle of swearing a blue streak aimed at Harris Huffington. He cautiously slipped into the room and quickly shut the door behind him and waited to be noticed. He took pity on the older gentleman sitting in the red paisley wingback chair, the company's lawyer. He was slightly surprised to see the nearly bald man was not dressed in his usual three piece suit, but in khaki trousers and a blue and white stripped golf shirt. The man had seen Duo enter the room and acknowledged him with a nod of his head, a move that stopped Charise in the middle of her tirade.

"Duo! There you are," she cried out, then rushed to close the distance between them. Grabbing his arm she exclaimed, "You'll never believe what the scum bag Huffington is trying to pull." His boss was highly agitated and stressed beyond anything he'd seen before, a fact made evident by her raised voice as well as her uncharacteristic appearance. The white blouse she wore was only partially tucked into the waistband of her pink pencil skirt. Her normally coiffed hair was in utter disarray and, if he wasn't mistaken, she'd forgotten to apply makeup to her left eye while the right one was fully loaded. It would be obvious to a stranger that the cool and composed business women was deeply shaken by the false charges made by another designer. "He's accusing me of fraud, of larceny, can you believe it? It's him, no doubt, who has stolen my designs only to turn around and accuse me of the worst, most atrocious broach of business ethics in our industry. He's trying to ruin me with these scandalous charges."

"Now, now, my dear," the gentleman sitting chair interjected in a calming tone of voice, intended to soothe his client who was now pulling at the hair on the top of her head. "Things aren't as bad as they seem. You have an excellent reputation in the fashion industry. I'm sure when the garments in question are compared to Huffington's we'll find they aren't alike at all."

"Yes, that's right!" Charise brightened considerably. "My designs are timeless, classically styled, and even if that turd managed to scribble out something even close to my designs, just by happenstance, my fabrics, not to attention the details of the garments, will no doubt prove my innocence."

"What would you like me to do?" Duo asked, anxious to help.

Mr. Perry Rhoads turned his attention to the handsome young man. "I need to have a photo of each article of clothing that was in the fashion show. I've asked Mr. Huffington's lawyer for photos of the garments in question, hoping to settle this matter before it ends up in court." With a look of regret aimed at Charise he added, "I'm afraid I won't be able to keep this from the media, though. If Mr. Huffington behaves as he has in the past, he'll most likely call the press himself. He's a bit of an attention hound."

"Damn the man," Charise said, combing her fingers through her hair, which was looking more and more Medusa-like from the mistreatment it had received that morning. "He's a mediocre clothing designer to begin with. To stoop so low as to accuse me of copying his pathetic attempts to design is an unforgivable insult to me and a disgrace to our profession."

"Can I get you anything, Charise?" Duo asked again.

His boss shook her head in answer, but then turned to him with a new idea shining in her eyes. "I need coffee and a devil's food doughnut with chocolate frosting," she declared. "And I needed them half an hour ago."

Duo nodded, silently hoping that if he couldn't snag that particular doughnut in the break room he'd be able to find a bakery somewhere close by. Charise rarely indulged in food so high in carbohydrates. To ask for such a breakfast was more proof of her upset. "Mr. Rhodes? Can I get you something?"

"Nothing for me, thank you, Duo. After Huffington's lawyer contacted me about his suit, I thought I should come and reassure Charise before I leave for my vacation later this morning that my firm is on top of this case. Our junior partner will be handling the case in my absence and should be calling here shortly."

"I think it's highly unethical and insensitive of you to abandon me in my hour of need, Perry," Charise cut in, looking put out by the man's ill timing.

"I assure you, Charise, I had this vacation planned eight months ago. My wife wants to visit Ireland, the home of her ancestors. She's an avid genealogist, and if I were to cancel on her at the last moment, well, she'd never forgive either one of us."

"Fine. Go ahead and trot through old rotting graveyards and musty books filled with dates of your long-dead relatives. I'll just be here struggling to keep my business afloat and my employees paid." Duo knew that Charise often employed tactics of guilt to get people to do what she wanted, but it appeared the wizened lawyer had seen it all before.

"You'll be fine under Mr. Yuy's care, my dear. I have full confidence in my associate to see you through this situation. He's competent and smart beyond his years. Gaining his position as associate at twenty seven speaks highly of our expectations for him and of his abilities for winning cases."

"I've met the man, of course, and I'm sure he's all you said, but he's not you, Perry," Charise sulked.

Duo backed toward the door, saying, "If you'll excuse me, I'll be back as soon as I can find your chocolate doughnut with chocolate frosting."

"Don't forget the coffee." Charise called out as she waved him off. As he closed the door behind him, Duo heard Mr. Rhodes try once again to comfort her with regards to his replacement.

For the rest of that day, as well as the next, Charise remained high strung and agitated, unable to work at her desk as a result of the lawsuit that had been filed against her. By noon on Tuesday Duo was more than happy to escape the office for his scheduled, weekly appointment with Trowa. He met his auburn-haired friend in the locker room of the fitness club, where they quickly changed into shorts and T-shirts and walked with their usual camaraderie to the racketball court that had been reserved for them every Tuesday at noon for the past two years. Duo couldn't help but cast an appreciative look at his friend. Trowa was damn good looking. At six feet, Trowa was a good three inches taller than he was. His auburn hair was cut short in back and the sides, but there was a long fringe of hair that swooped over his forehead, the result of a cowlick that would never be tamed. His face was classically handsome, and his eyes an emerald green that Duo had always found beautiful.

"You didn't call to tell us about your working trip," Trowa said out of the blue, as he waited for Duo to serve the ball.

"I haven't had more than a spare moment to eat since I got back, what with the show and all," he explained, then grunted as he hit the ball and lined himself up to return whatever Trowa sent his way.

The game began as it usually did, being fast and furious, which was typical given that both men were competitive. After winning a third point, Duo found himself blurting out his latest news. "I got laid."

Trowa stopped in his tracks and looked incredulously at his friend. "When did this happen?"

"On my trip up north."

"I didn't realize you were seeing anyone. You never said anything."

"I'm not. Seeing anyone, that is."

The incredulous expression changed to one of concern. "A casual fling? That doesn't seem like you, Duo."

Duo shrugged. It wasn't like him, but how could he explain to his former boyfriend that he'd had sex for the first time with a prostitute. "It was spontaneous and it just... happened."

Trowa's racket lowered and his face was a picture of seriousness. "I find that hard to believe, considering your history."

He was starting to get seriously pissed-off at the other man. "It took me 25 years to finally let it happen, Trowa. I thought you'd be happy for me. Why is it so hard to believe that I finally got over my hang ups and experience something I never could before? I haven't been paying Quatre for nothing these past two years, have I?"

Trowa stepped closer and put his hand on his shoulder. "It's just that I know how deeply ingrained your aunt's verbal poisoning went, Duo. I'm not unhappy that you've overcome your problem, it's just that this seems so sudden, like a spontaneous act on your part and not a step up in a relationship with someone you care for. That's what seems so unlike you. You've always said you wanted to be in a committed relationship. What's changed?"

His feeling of irritation morphed into anger. Duo shrugged off the other man's hand. "What's changed?" he asked hotly. "Maybe the fact that I'm damn sick and tired of being alone, of being left for someone else who can have sex. Who cares about how I did it or with whom? What's important is that finally, at 25 years old, I had sex for the first time and it was incredible. I thought you'd be happy for me."

The concern on Trowa's face didn't diminish as Duo hoped it would. In fact, it seemed to deepen. "Who was it, Duo?"

"None of your god-damn business." It was apparent their pleasant racketball game was over, and as far as Duo was concerned, so was this discussion. He turned and strode angrily towards the door, intending to leave.

"Duo, wait!" Trowa called out. Two steps before he reached the door, a hand firmly latched onto his forearm and held him in place. He turned with a scathing look directed at his friend. Trowa held up both and said, "Look, I'm sorry. But Quatre and I care about you. This is a big step in your life and I want to be supportive, but your being evasive isn't helping me to do that. Please, tell me what happened."

Duo could tell that Trowa was being honest with him, but somehow his concern stung and he wasn't sure why. "Look," he began with a weary sigh. He really didn't want to tell his former boyfriend about Tex. "I met a drool-worthy guy, we connected and had great sex. That's all there is to it. I've broken past the barriers that kept me from having a relationship with you and a dozen other guys that I've fallen for since I was sixteen. I'm grateful to the guy, but there is no relationship."

"It's just seem so unlike you to have casual sex," Trowa said, still frowning. "I think you should talk to Quatre about this."

"I'll see him on Thursday, for my usual appointment."

For the first time since he'd blurted out his news, a faint smile tugged at Trowa's lips. Duo figured the man was relieved that he'd be seeing Quatre. There would be no doubt in Trowa's mind that the blond would get to the bottom of his first sexual encounter. Duo wasn't looking forward to that session. Quatre always wanted to talk a subject to death before they could move on to the next one. They'd probably hash over his first sexual encounter for two months. Just thinking about it was giving him a stomach ache.

"Good," Trowa said. "Are we still on for dinner on Friday?"

Duo had originally agreed to having dinner with the two lovebirds every Friday to show that he didn't have any hard feelings about Trowa dumping him for Quatre. Many a time he'd dreaded the end of the work week because of it. Watching the other two men have the kind of relationship he could only fantasize about made him feel more lonely and depressed than if he'd spent the night alone in his apartment eating a T.V. dinner and bemoaning his lot in life.

"It all depends on Charise and if she's not a neurotic mess from this lawsuit that's been filed against her. I might have to make her dinner at her place if things go badly. The new lawyer from the law firm that has represented her over the years is due to show up this afternoon. He's supposed to be something special, so I can only hope he can calm her down so that the rest of us aren't walking around the office like it's a mine field."

"Well, I wish you luck with that. Do you want to finish the game?"

Having returned to a more relaxed manner, Duo could tell that Trowa was over their spat. Why didn't he feel that way? He scolded himself for acting like a woman, holding onto an argument or hurt feelings for much longer than he needed to. This is way it had between him and Trowa since their break up. They'd argue or disagree and as soon as it was over Trowa would be fine and ready to move on. He, on the other hand, would bury his hurt feelings and resentment, not really getting over his hurt feelings. He'd never really forgiven Trowa for his desertion. Leaving him for Quatre felt like a betrayal more than a cordial parting of ways, which was how Trowa described their breakup. Maybe he should have taken Quatre's suggestion, that the three of them part ways professionally and personally, at least until he'd had time to come to terms with the change in their relationships. It was too late for that now, he thought. He'd played the forgiving jilted lover well, making the other two men believe that everything between them was good.

"No, I'm out of the mood," he answered Trowa's question. "Guess I've just got too much on my mind. I'd better get back to Charise."

They walked back to the locker room, speaking casually of mundane and safe topics. Changing back into his suit, Duo stole another glance at Trowa as he too changed. Talk about drool-worthy. Trowa was ridiculously attractive, but without clothes he was simply drop-dead gorgeous. Sleek muscles beneath flawless skin, a flat stomach and long, lean legs. Jealousy stabbed at his heart. What was once offered to him, could have been his, now belonged to someone else.

Speeding up, he finished dressing before Trowa even had his socks and shoes back on. With a hasty goodbye, he turned to leave, pausing only when Trowa called out a reminder about his appointment with Quatre on Thursday. For some reason that small reminder soured Duo's mood more than ever. He could only hope Charise was in a better mood that afternoon. He just wasn't up for any more upsets.

TBC

Note: Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, commented and critiqued. I appreciate all of your thoughts and do consider what you've said. I'm still learning about the art of writing, so I hope you[ll be patient and forgiving as I learn more with each story I write. Also, be patient with Duo. He's carrying a lot of baggage and won't always act as you might think he should, especially if you compare him with the Duo in the GW series. Remember, this is an A.U. story. He's not held to the L2 boy's vow not to lie, though he certainly seems to run and hide, doesn't he? ^_^


	7. Chapter 7

**The Pretender  
Part 7**

Duo returned to his office feeling out of sorts from his less than successful racquetball game with Trowa. He noticed straight away that Charise's office door was shut. He double checked her docket for the afternoon, confirming there was nothing scheduled until one thirty. Tapping his pen on the desktop, he wondered what she was doing and if maybe she needed something. Charise hadn't said anything about leaving the office or meeting with any of the staff before he'd left for the gym. Well, he'd just wait for her to summon him, having enough work already without volunteering to do more. With that decided he turned his attention to the stack of work on his desk that he needed to get through before going home that evening.

"Duo?" The intercom on his desk came to life ten minutes later. "Are you back?"

Hitting the button, he answered. "Yes, I'm here."

"Mr. Yuy was able to meet with me earlier than his scheduled appointment this afternoon, and we've both missed lunch. Could you order us each a turkey sandwich from the deli across the street? You know how I like mine and Mr. Yuy likes his with everything, minus mayonnaise."

"Anything to drink?"

There was a pause before Charise replied. "Bottled water for both of us, please. Thank you, dear."

"I'll be back soon."

So Mr. Yuy had finally shown up, and before his scheduled appointment at four that afternoon. He wouldn't be surprised if Charise, being as upset as she was by the lawsuit, had called her lawyer's office and demanded to see the associate newly assigned to her case as soon as he was free. With the outrageous amount of money she paid for retaining that prestigious law firm, it only seemed right that when Charise said jump, the new lawyer would hit his head on the ceiling trying to make her happy.

He made a quick call to the deli Charise liked to order from at least once a week. From past experience he knew that by the time he walked to the small business, his order would be ready to go. All the better for him returning to the office with her food. The hungrier she got, the more Charise's temperament waned. Feeling a bit hungry himself, he added a chef salad to the order.

Fetching the lunches took a little over fifteen minutes. He quickly crossed his office and set the chef salad on his desk then carried the rest of the order to the closed door of Charise's office and knocked before turning the door knob and easing it open. Entering her office, Duo found Charise sitting behind her desk and focused on the papers in her hands. Her new lawyer sat in one of the wingback chairs facing her, dressed in a black suit that was probably appropriate court attire, his face hidden as he bent over in a stack of papers in his hands. Duo really couldn't see much, but he thought the dark mussed hair was really attractive, though he was curious about what the man's face looked like.

Not wanting to interrupt, he quietly made his way to the desk and emptied the contents of the bags, unfolding the paper wrappers to expose the sandwiches and setting the water bottles out. Finishing that task, he decided to satisfy his curiosity by glancing at the lawyer, and the moment he did his world crumbled around him and he experienced the greatest shock of his life. Gasping, he and stumbled back, stunned by seeing someone he never thought he'd meet again. The cowboy from The Light on the Hill. The small sound that had escaped him caught the lawyer's attention and man looked up with a mix of both irritation and curiosity visible on his face. The moment their eyes met and the dark blue eyes widened with recognition. "Laredo?"

_Holy shit! _That was all that came to his mind, other than, _This is bad, really bad. _He quickly glanced at Charise for her reaction, just in time to see her gaze go from Mr. Yuy to him, her face expressing her curiosity.

"I think you have me c..c.. confused with someone else," Duo stammered, unable to think of anything else to say. "Eh...excuse me." He turned and literally ran from the room. Bypassing his own desk, he made a bee-line for the men's room down the hall and locked himself in one of the stalls. Thank God the room was empty. He checked to make sure the seat was down and clean before he sat on its edge and buried his head in his hands, feeling utterly mortified. How the hell did Tex come to be Charise's new lawyer? It was pretty damn clear that the man of his dreams wasn't a prostitute employed at The Light on the Hill.

Oh hell, he was beginning to hyperventilate. He concentrated for several moments on catching his breath. It wouldn't do his reputation any good to be found gasping for breath in a bathroom stall, or worse, passed out on the floor from lack of oxygen. What were the odds that he and Tex would ever meet again, and under these circumstances? Double shit. Yes, that seemed to perfectly sum up the situation.

Thankfully, no one came in to use the restroom while he was barricaded in the toilet and asking himself questions for which he had no answers. After his breathing rate returned to normal and he felt some of his panic lessening, he became more aware of the passage of time. There was no way he could hide in the bathroom all day, not with all the work he had on his desk. Besides, Charise would go ballistic if he wasn't available when she needed him.

Resigned to having return to his desk, he reluctantly got up, opened the stall's door and moved to the sink. He washed his hands out of habit and studied his reflection in the mirror. "What the hell are you going to do now?" he asked himself. With no answer coming, he sighed and shook his head. There was nothing to do now but face the music.

His feet felt like they were encased in cement as he trudged his way back to his office, not quite knowing what to expect when he got there. Thankfully, Charise's door was still closed. No doubt she'd expect an explanation for the odd exchange between himself and her new lawyer, not to mentions his rather undignified exit. Playing that scene over in his head, Duo sat in his chair and lay his face on his desk, allowing the surface to cool his flushed face and burning ears. He really needed to calm down, refocus and get back to work. Taking a deep breath, he sat up and set his mind on doing just that.

Having lost his appetite, he picked distractedly at his salad and sipped his drink, worrying about what would happen when Charise's door opened. Thankfully, a phone call came in from one of their fabric suppliers who insisted on speaking to Charise. Duo transferred the call, tossed what remained of his lunch into the garbage, then returned to his usual routine, which helped to put aside his worries.

Half an hour later, he jumped slightly when his boss's door opened. Charise was speaking to the dark haired man as they left her office together. Quickly busying himself, Duo kept his eyes averted away from the two as they stood just outside her office door. As far as he could tell they were exchanging brief goodbyes. And then the room suddenly fell ominously silent. Looking up from beneath his eyelashes he could see someone in a dark suit standing in front of his desk. "Mr. Maxwell?"

Well, he couldn't get away with pretending he hadn't heard the man, seeing that he was standing right in front of him, so out of politeness Duo slowly raised his head and look at the lawyer from above the rim of his glasses. Yes, there stood the man who had dominated his dreams since he'd returned home from the working vacation. "Hello," he said, at a loss for words. The man was as gorgeous as he remembered. His eyes, so blue and surrounded by thick black eyelashes, made his stomach flutter.

Unexpectedly, Tex held his hand out. "I'm sorry if I startled you earlier. It's nice to see you again."

Duo looked at the proffered hand for a moment, dumbfounded. The man was actually wanting to shake his hand. Unable to think of any other response, he placed his hand in the palm of the lawyer's hand and they shook. "H...how are you?" He inwardly winced, thinking that he sounded like an insecure school boy instead of a grown man.

The handshake continued. "I'm good. I didn't know you worked for Ms. DuFrame. She's told me how invaluable you are as her assistant."

Duo glanced around the other man at the mention of his boss's name. Sure enough, Charise was standing by her open door with a look on her face that told him she was slightly worried. He could only guess that look stemmed from his abrupt departure from her office. Seeing that he was all right, she made an excuse about getting back to work then disappeared into her office and closed the door, leaving the two men alone.

Two seconds after the click of the closing door sounded behind him, Tex's pleasant smile had disappeared altogether. With their hands still clasped, the lawyer tightened his grip as he leaned over the desk and asked with a sneer, "How's tricks, _Laredo_?" He then stepped back and pulled his hand away as if he'd touched something dirty. Duo could have crawled beneath his desk he was so embarrassed. Then a thought came to him that he wasn't the only one who should feel embarrassed.

Forcing a smirk to form on his own lips, he replied, "I guess I could ask the same thing of you, _Tex_."

"Look," the lawyer began again in a matter-of-fact tone of voice while straightening his expensive tie. "I don't know what game you're playing or why, but I'm Ms. DuFrame's lawyer, at least on the suit that's been filed against her by Huffington. Considering your position as her assistant, I expect you to behave towards me in a business-like manner. Let's just forget about the afternoon we met and treat each other like the strangers we are."

"I don't need to be lectured by you as to how I should behave at work," Duo snapped back. Then collecting himself, he said in a more dignified manner, "But I agree, you treat me with the same respect you expect from me and we'll ignore each other as much as possible."

Yuy nodded, signaling a detente of sorts had been reached. He then turned and strode out of his office. It wasn't until he heard the ding of the elevator, signaling the man's departure, that Duo let out the breath he'd been holding. That hadn't gone as badly as it could have, but neither did it go well. The feeling of dread that sat in the pit of his stomach earlier now eased up. He now felt only slightly queezy.

"What was that all about?" Unaware that she'd come out of her office, Duo was started by the sound of Charise's voice. "I gather the two of you have met before?"

"I'm afraid so," Duo answered, wondering how much he was going to tell his boss, a born meddler.

"Oh, I know," she said, her eyes alight with realization. "Mr. Yuy and several of his colleagues visited the ranch at the same time we were there. You met him then, didn't you?"

"That's right." Duo tried to sound unaffected by that not so inconsequential meeting. No need for his boss to know about his tryst with her lawyer.

"Duo, what's wrong? Did you and Mr. Yuy not hit it off? Did he say anything to offend you?"

If he told Charise that her lawyer had done anything inappropriate, or even said something to upset him, it would cause her protective instincts to flare up and maybe lash out. He didn't doubt that she would call the law firm and have a different lawyer representing her within the hour. He might feel uncomfortable with Mr. Yuy around, but there was no way he was going to do or say anything that might bring unwarranted repercussions against the man. It was his own fault for thinking that the cowboy he'd met was a prostitute, and that he'd basically bent over and let the man screw him. He reluctantly reminded himself that until he'd come face to face with Tex in the room with his boss, he'd been grateful to him for unknowingly helping him overcoming his problem.

"No, he didn't offend me. He's just really attractive and I guess I'm a bit tongue-tied around him."

Charise's face lit with a smile and she winked at him. "He is hot, isn't he? I don't know if he swings your way or not, but I wouldn't mind seeing him out of that suit, if you know what I mean." She waggled her eyebrows, teasing him. He didn't want to tell her that the man in question probably wouldn't be interested in getting naked with her or any other woman, especially if he had to explain how he had come by that kind of personal bit of information about someone he'd only met once. "Well, you saw him first," he said, hoping she let go of the subject soon.

"And he's smart, too. Perry was right, there's something very special about that man. He seems to have it all: good looks, an incredible body, an intelligent mind and a paycheck that could make even me happy. What's not to like about that package, right?"

"Right." Duo cleared his throat and busied himself shuffling the papers on his desk into a neat stack. "So, are you ready for the meeting with Dan Salazar. He's bringing the fabric samples you requested."

Diverted from the subject of Mr. Yuy, Charise turned her attention towards another topic of interest: the following year's fall line of clothing and footwear. Duo could only hope that their regular work routine would soon return to normal and that Mr. Yuy would not have to visit the office often.

TBC

Note: Sorry this is so late. I've been in a rush for almost two weeks now, and there's no end in sight. At the moment I'm rushing to get to a baby shower on time, but if I don't post now, it will be much, much later. So, I apologize if I've missed a typeo or other error. I never do anything well when I'm rushed.


	8. Chapter 8

warning: language, adult topics

**The Pretender  
Chapter 8**

By Thursday both of Duo's wishes seemed to have come true: the workplace had almost returned to normal and Mr. Yuy hadn't found the need to drop in again to consult with Charise. Having been reassured by her new lawyer that he had everything in hand regarding the Huffington lawsuit, Charise returned to her drawing boards and the swirl of activity that surrounded her creative process helped the work day hours to pass more quickly. He ran a couple of personal errands for her that morning, scheduled any necessary appointments and generally held everything together so the designers creative juices could flow without distracting interruptions.

He left his office a half hour later than he should have, barely making it to his weekly appointment with Quatre. He wasn't looking forward to the scheduled half-hour visit, especially since the blond would have been informed of his breakthrough by Trowa, meaning there would be a battery of questions he'd have to answer. An uneasy feeling churned in the pit of his stomach when he thought about it. He was worried that Quatre might react to his news much like Trowa had and criticize him for how he'd gone about having sex for the first time.

It turned out that he didn't have to wait long in the empty waiting room before the door he'd walked though many, many times before opened and Quatre's four thirty appointment stepped out of his inner office. Irritatingly enough, the middle-aged woman wearing a fitted, dark green business suit, was all smiles, as if Quatre had just helped her find the fountain of youth. How come he never felt like that after one of their sessions? He stood as his shrink bade the woman a polite goodbye and stepped back to let Duo pass by him to enter the room the braided man termed the chamber of doom and gloom.

"It's good to see you, Duo," Quatre said, closing the door behind him. As usual, he motioned for him to take one of the two leather chairs, slightly facing each other with a small, round, mahogany table set between them.

Quatre was in his late twenties and nearly equal in height and weight as Duo, five foot seven and on the slender side. He had straight blond hair that he wore fashionably long and clothes that look liked they'd come off of a model in Esquire magazine. He was attractive, in a cute boyish way, but more than anything it was Quatre's smile that won people over. Smiling seemed to come easy to the blond therapist, and honestly, it often brightened a room, like sunshine radiating warmth and happiness. Duo figured that the blond's smile factored into why he was such a sought after therapist. From his own experience, he knew the gift of Quatre's smile at the end of a session, no matter how horrific it might have been, was enough to make him feel that there were a few things right in the world.

He took his usual seat, to the right of the small table, knowing Quatre preferred the other. And while the blond took his seat he asked a few polite questions concerning his health and work. With the mundane pleasantries completed, the blond therapist formally opened their session by getting to the heart of the matter. "Trowa tells me you've had sex with someone. Would you like to tell me about it?"

He watched the blond pick up his notepad and pen from off the table, signaling the man was now armed and ready for whatever happened during the next half hour. Duo cleared his throat and said, "I'm pretty sure he's told you all you need to know."

"But I'd like to hear it from you. Where did this happen?"

Duo rolled his eyes, knowing Trowa probably repeated every word he'd uttered. "On my working vacation at Charise's ranch." He told Quatre about the horseback ride with Hilde and how on their approach to the House on the Hill he'd spotted an attractive cowboy sitting on the fence. From the massage to the hot tub, he pretty much laid the whole scene out for the other man, and all the while the furious scratching of the pen on the tablet of paper never let up as Quatre took notes. For some reason that little bit of noise was seriously pissing him off.

"I was imagining what it would be like to work in a place like that," he continued, "when Mr. Gorgeous cowboy showed up, undressed himself and joined me in the hot tub. At first, I thought he was a figment of my imagination, a part of the fantasy I had running in my head, and then one thing led to another and we had sex. End of story."

The pen scratching abruptly stopped and Quatre looked up with one eyebrow lifted in what looked like disbelief. "I think you must be leaving something out, Duo. Considering your issues it's hard for me to believe that you met a complete stranger at a whore house and you gave him what you've never been able to give to anyone else. If you had consulted with me beforehand, or even hinted in our last session about your intentions, I would have advised you to wait. I don't think you were ready for such a drastic step."

Duo's ire immediately shot up. "What do you mean you don't think I was ready? I've been coming to you for two years with my problems, Quatre. How long did you think it was going to take?"

Remaining an appearance of calm, the blond man replied. "I only meant that you made this decision rather suddenly, and went from one extreme to the other; namely, your inability to have sex to having sex with a complete stranger. What I'm concerned about is that you chose to have your first sexual experience with someone you didn't know nor have any vested interest in other than the fact that he was 'gorgeous'. That action is opposite of the type of relationship you've spoken of in our sessions. We also talked about exercising caution when selecting a partner and building a foundation of trust with him before engaging in any physical activity."

Duo's hands closed into fists. With pent-up feelings of resentment towards the man who was now questioning his motives and decision to have sex, coupled with the lingering anxiety from his confrontation with Mr. Yuy two days before, it really wasn't going to take much more to push him over the edge. "You think I made this decision off the cuff?" Duo asked between clenched teeth, and as he continued his voice rose in volume. "Dammit, Quatre, I'm twenty-five years old, what the hell is so sudden about that? Huh? And yeah, you and I have talked about my being cautious, and just every other subject under the moon as well. I'm all talked out, Quatre. I'm sick to death from talking about my fears and hang-ups, my aunt and everyone who's ever hurt me. We've talked and talked and nothing ever got better!"

"Healing takes time and patience," Quatre said, his tone of voice seeming to prove that he had plenty of both.

"And I'm sick of waiting." Jumping from his seat, Duo began pacing. His agitation was such that he felt like he might burst if he didn't let some of his pent up anger out. "And since we seemed to be at a stand still in these sessions and I hadn't been making any progress, I went to someone else about my problems. In the few months I've been seeing her, she's helped me more than the years I've spent talking to you. I have her to thank for my finally getting laid, not you or the thousands of dollars I've handed over to you." He wasn't sure why he'd let that bit of information about Dorothy come out, but it felt good to speak the truth and seeing the look of shock and a hint of hurt in the big blue eyes didn't feel so bad either.

Barely maintaining the appearance of calm, Quatre asked, "Who is this person, Duo? I hope you picked a certified therapist."

He didn't doubt the blond would object to the other professional he'd been seeing, still, he blurted out her name. "Dorothy Catalonia. I'm sure you've heard of her? She certainly seems to know you." The shocked expression on Quatre's face told him he had at least heard of the woman and had formed a negative opinion of her.

His therapist gasped, "Duo... how did you find out about Ms. Catalonia? She's hardly the person I would recommend for someone as traumatized as you are. Is she even credentialed?"

"Funny, she asked the same about you when I told her about your stealing Trowa," Duo snapped back, then plowed on despite the gasp he heard from the other man. "And yes, she's a legitimate therapist all right, with as many framed certificates on her wall as you have on yours. I ran into an old friend of mine who told me about her. His current lover had been raised in a conservative religion and carried a load of guilt about not only having sex with a man, but out of marriage as well. Apparently, his hangups were similar to my own. Knowing about my problems and that I was still trying to overcome them, he recommended Dorothy. She may be a bit unorthodox in her methods, but she's helped me get past my sexual barriers more than any of the tripe you've handed me." Oh, he was really on a roll now and a look of shock flashed across the blond's face before he composed himself again.

"There's no need to be mean and spiteful, Duo."

The braided man's conscience told him not to engage in a tit for tat argument with the man, but he couldn't help it. For the first time since Trowa had left him he was being honest about his feelings, and letting out all the emotions he'd bottled up in order to "be nice" felt damn good. "I think I have every right to be mean and spiteful. How many thousands of dollars have I paid you hoping you'd help me and accepting your reassurances that I was making progress? Yet instead of helping me so that I could be intimate with Trowa, you stole him from me. Don't I have the right to be pissed off about that? Do you know what it feels like to see you two all lovey-dovey knowing that it should be me in Trowa's arms, and that it would be me if I'd just had sex with him."

"Duo!" Quatre stood, his voice sounding as shell-shocked as he looked. All color had drained from the blond's face and it looked like he was having a hard time breathing. "You said you were all right with Trowa and I being together. You were the one who came to me, begging me to take you back as a patient."

"Yeah, well I lied!" Duo yelled back with enough vehemence that the blond took a step back, his blue eyes wide with alarm. "Do you have any idea how much you two hurt me? I trusted Trowa, enough to tell him about my problem and to ask him to be patient with me while I worked on fixing my problems. I arranged for him to meet with you so you could assure him that I would get better with continued therapy. I trusted you as my therapist, told you my deepest, darkest secrets, my hopes and dreams. And what did you do? You stole my boyfriend right out from under my nose. It was easy wasn't it? You let him fuck you when I wasn't capable of doing it, so congratulations, man, you win the award for the most unethical therapist of the century." His voice had risen enough that surely anyone waiting in the next room, hell, the whole floor, must have heard him.

Still looking stunned, Quatre stammered, "But... if you... if you felt that way, why didn't you say something? Why did you ask me to be your therapist again? Why did you say you were okay with our relationship? You even agreed to have dinner with us every Friday."

Duo's eyes narrowed on the man he'd resented for far too long. He knew he should try to control this surge of anger, but he just couldn't help letting go of everything he'd been bottling up for nearly a year. "You mean the weekly torture night? That's how I've referred to it, if you didn't know. Did you really think it was pleasant for me, seeing you and Trowa together, knowing how you'd taken him away from me? Your cuddling up together on your sofa, whispering endearments and passing suggestive innuendos that weren't very subtle wasn't cute to me, it's damn hurtful. It feels like you've been rubbing your relationship with Trowa in my face, flaunting that you have what I crave, and all because I couldn't put out. Now, with Dorothy's help, I can, and you dare to question me about the how and why of it? What's your angle this time, Quatre? Let's see, can I make poor, pitiful Duo feel worse about himself, make him question and regret something that might just keep him from being alone all his life?" Duo's eyes narrowed. "As far as I'm concerned you're a lousy therapist, and an even worse friend. We're done, Quatre. You're no longer my therapist and, frankly, you never were much of a friend."

With righteous indignation spurring him on, Duo stormed to the door. He ignored the few sputtering noises coming from the blond as he threw open the door and was met by the wide-eyed stares of two men in the waiting room, obviously a couple. "Watch yourselves," Duo warned as a last parting shot, "Winner steals boyfriends."

He made it to the hallway and nearly to the elevator before Quatre's anxious voice called out to him. "Duo, wait!" He ignored the voice as well as the sound of running footsteps behind him. The hand that gripped his arm pulled him to a full stop. He whipped himself around to face the other man.

Quatre's eyes were pleading as he said, "Please, Duo. You're upset. Let's talk this out. I know you didn't mean what you said but there's obviously some truth in it, and I can see you're hurt and upset. For the sake of our friendship, for your friendship with Trowa, come back to the office and let's talk this out."

Duo glared down at the restraining hand until Quatre let go and stepped back. Narrowed eyes, sparking with anger, leveled on the blond's face. "I told you that I'm sick to death of talking. I've told you more truths in the last five minutes than you've gotten out of me in over two years of therapy. You were right, suggesting that we terminate our professional relationship after Trowa left me. If I hadn't been so desperate about not being alone, believing all the tripe you'd fed me about my getting better, I might have been man enough to pound you into the ground for what you did to me. Goodbye, Quatre."

Turning on his heel, he left the stricken looking blond standing in the middle of the hallway. Instead of waiting for the elevator, Duo dashed through the door leading to the stairwell and climbed down fifteen flights of stairs in order to burn off some of the anger that was still simmering beneath his skin. Damn, but that felt good, he thought with a triumphant grin. He should have done that a long time ago.

Feeling energized, he walked briskly home. It was only a little over a mile from downtown, but the exercise helped him to calm down. By the time he stepped into his apartment, his anger had begun to fade and guilt had begun to seep in. "I've nothing to feel guilty about," he said out loud, trying to keep hold of that energizing anger.

Of course the red light on his phone was blinking, indicating he had a message waiting. Actually, there were three messages waiting for him, and he knew without a doubt who had left them. Hitting the button, Quatre's not so steady voice said his name, but that was as far as he got before Duo deleted the message, unheard. The next voice was Trowa's. "Duo, what the hell..." That message shared the same fate as the first. "Duo, honey, this is your Aunt Helen. Will you please call me when you get home from work? I'll talk to you later." His aunt always had the worst timing.

He ignored the last message in favor of the kitchen. After scouring the refrigerator and cupboards, he decided he wasn't really hungry. Taking out a bowl, a box of cereal and milk, he ate a single bowl of granola without tasting or enjoying it as his argument with Quatre went round and round in his head. He couldn't regret getting all that anger off his chest, but was it really Quatre's fault that he'd held onto his resentment for so long? Hadn't he reassured both he and Trowa that bygones were bygones? He rinsed out his bowl and put it and his spoon into the dishwasher, where it joined at least ten others. Seeing that he had enough to justify turning on the machine, he poured the liquid detergent into the dispensing cup, closed the front and started the wonderfully quiet dishwasher.

Deciding to keep himself busy and not think about his earlier confrontation, he busied himself by changing into a pair of sweats and a T-shirt, gathered up his laundry, performed general clean up, and then sat in front of the television. He sighed deeply, suddenly feeling weary. His eyes scanned his apartment. Everything in it had been selected with care. The decor was a mix between contemporary and modern, blending with African artifacts set about the room on table tops and wall hangings. The combination was appealing to the eye, comfortable and, unfortunately, he had no one to share it with. Closing his eyes and laying his head against the back of the soft leather sofa, he fought against the familiar wave of loneliness that had risen within him once again. He was sick to death of being alone. Was he so terrible that he couldn't find anyone to share his life with? After his fight with Quatre, he was beginning to think that maybe he was.

The sudden ringing of his phone made him jump. He waited until the machine picked up, and got up from his comfortable position when he heard his aunt's voice.

"Hi, Aunt Helen," he said without any enthusiasm and cutting into her message.

"Did you just get home, dear?"

"Only long enough to change out of my work clothes," he answered, taking the phone back with him to the sofa. He flopped down on it and readied himself for a lengthy conversation. His aunt was lonely, and he understood how terrible that could feel. He listened to her complaints about her health, her visits to the doctor and of the high cost of prescriptions. He was brought up to date on the lives of her friends, including their health and their boasting or disbelief at their offsprings' behavior. He often wondered what his aunt had to say about him to her ancient friends during their bi-weekly lunch get-together.

After forty five minutes of the mostly one-sided conversation, they ventured into the usual questions. "Are you dating anyone, Duo? I just don't understand why a good looking man such as yourself can't find a decent woman to settle down with. I'd love to be a great aunt one day. You know that Diedra's daughter is graduating from law school. She lives in the city and, if you'd like, I could ask for her number and the two of you could get acquainted."

As usual, Duo put her off, knowing she didn't want to face the fact that he was gay. Apparently, there was no getting through to her. He'd been trying since he'd come out to her while in college. "I'm sure she's a nice person with a great career ahead of her, but I'm not interested, Aunt Helen, and you know perfectly well why."

"I just can't believe that you would prefer men to women." Her voice had a belligerent edge to it. "Don't you want to have a family? Have children to carry on your name? It's not natural, men having sex with other men. It's wrong. I just don't know what I did wrong. I honestly tried my best to raise you to live a good life, but you seem determined to live in an unwholesome manner. I'm sure your working for that designer is part of the problem. I know what they say about the fashion industry. It's as bad as ballet dancers. Gay, all of them, or so I'm told. There are jobs opening up at the factory in town that makes medical equipment, you know, pace makers and artificial knees and hip joints. I'm sure that you could get a job there and be around people who won't encourage this idea you have of being gay."

This was how every conversation they had ended. His aunt truly didn't understand how he could have "turned" gay after all her lectures against it - the very lectures that were responsible for his relationship hang-ups. Quatre had urged him to cut off all ties with the woman, stating that one phone call from her negated whatever progress they'd made. But he couldn't do it, even though it was often a strain not to. She was his only family, and he was hers. He might not be the heterosexual man she wanted him to be, but he owed her, and if he was nothing else. he was grateful for all that his aunt had done for him. Still, that didn't mean these weekly conversations with her had to be one sided.

"I've told you, Aunt Helen, I'm gay because I was born this way. I know it isn't a trait in your family and I can't explain it, but I'm gay. That's why I won't meet any of the women you try to set me up with. But your heart can rest at ease knowing I'm not in any relationship. Your almost daily lectures during high school have all but ruined me for a normal relationship."

"Normal? What's so normal about wanting to have sex with a man?" she snapped back.

It was the tone more than her words that set him off. "It's not just about sex. I want to be in a life-long relationship with someone. To come home at night knowing there's someone waiting for me, someone who's happy to hear about my day and to share my life with. Why did you do it, Aunt Helen? All those lectures about the evils of homosexuality, how sodomy or even letting another man touch me was base and defiling. You drilled it into me day after day until I can't get your voice out of my head." And then out of his mouth came what he really felt but hadn't had the nerve to say until that moment. "You knew, didn't you? Somehow you knew I was gay, probably even before I did."

There was a long pause, and that was answer enough for him. "You tried to change me, didn't you? With your daily lectures about how wrong it was to gay. Do you have any idea, Aunt Helen, how much you messed me up? I haven't had a true relationship with anyone because your voice keeps resounding in my head with your homophobic lectures and putdowns. I've been through years of therapy trying to drown out your voice. Why?" There was pain in his voice and tears of frustration welling up in his eyes as he asked that question.

After a moment, his aunt replied, her voice soft and almost contrite. "I only did what I felt was best. I had my reasons, Duo. God knows I did. But I am sorry if I've caused you pain. I can hear it in your voice, dear, but I truly believe that the gay lifestyle is a difficult one, and I would do anything to spare you the hurt and humiliation it will ultimately bring you."

Wiping the wetness from his eyes, he refused to let even one teardrop escape. Taking a deep breath helped him to calm down a bit. "I'd like to know those reasons, auntie. Who hurt you so badly, or influenced you enough that you would brainwash me against what should be a natural behavior for me? Was it Uncle Hank?" The two had separated when he was fourteen and less than six months after his cousin, their only child, had died. He recalled one night in particular when he'd heard a lot of angry yelling coming from their bedroom. Well, there had been a lot of that going on behind their closed door before, but not as loud or uncaring that he was hearing them as it had been that night. He awoke the next morning to find his uncle gone from the house as well as their lives. More than a couple of times he found his aunt crying in front of the television, no matter what program was on, and he couldn't help but wonder what had caused their marriage to breakup.

"I'd rather not talk about Hank," she answered solemnly.

"Well, I never want to have the conversations we have about my sexual preference, either, but we do anyway. So now, finally, we are going to talk about this because I deserve to know. Did Uncle Hank do something that made you decide to poison my mind?"

A choked sigh came from the other end of the line. "All right, dear. I'll tell you what you want to know, but not now and not on the phone. I'll tell you the next time you come home, and I'll apologize again and again if you insist, but I swear to you I only had your welfare in mind."

"Thanksgiving, then," he decided. It was still a little over a month away, and would no doubt be the first opportunity he'd have to leave the city and return to the place he'd once called home.

"All right," his aunt agreed. "Thanksgiving."

Their conversation stalled at that point, and neither of them made any further attempts to drag it out.

Going to his bathroom, Duo readied himself for bed. It was still a bit early still but he was feeling exhausted from the trying day. Taking out a bottle of prescription pills, he checked to make sure it was the Ambien that Quatre had prescribed to help him sleep. Seeing the name Dr. Quatre Winner neatly printed on the label added to the load of guilt he was beginning to feel. Now that he was calm and more rational, he felt guilty for lashing out at his former friend, especially in front of a couple of his clients. However, he couldn't entirely regret their fight nor their disassociation. He opened and tapped the bottle until one pill dropped into his open palm, then popped it into his mouth, knowing from experience that it would bring him a long, dreamless night of sleep, something he needed in order to deal with all the stress in his life. As he quickly prepared for bed, he could only hope that the next day would prove to be better than the one now ending.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

**The Pretender  
Chapter 9**

Friday morning began as it usually did with the same old questions from co-workers about what he had planned for the weekend. As usual, he hemmed and hawed then hinted at taking in a movie or trying a new restaurant he'd heard about. The truth was, he liked staying at home and doing anything that wasn't work related. He put so much into his job that it felt like taking a vacation when Saturday and Sunday came around.

Charise's hot-shot lawyer still hadn't come by the office nor had he called to speak with his boss, which was just another thing to be grateful for, as far as Duo was concerned. His absence meant there was one less problem to deal with at the office. Charise had calmed down as the week progressed, and had chosen to deal with the legal crisis by locking herself in her office. Armed with an enormous bowl of M&Ms and enough Mountain Dew to keep her awake and energized for a week, she'd asked Duo to take care of whatever incoming calls he could, then take messages for all the rest. She left orders that she was not to be interrupted unless it was absolutely necessary, allowing her creative juices to flow as she began the first steps in creating a new line for the coming year. Frustrated with the sales for her Spring and Summer show, which remained on hold until the lawsuit had been settled, Charise turned her full attention towards the coming year's fall and winter collections, which would debut in New York in April.

Having finished the list of tasks Charise had left on his desk that morning, Duo turned his attention on proofreading the letter she was sending out to her investors, the manufactures of her clothing line as well as to the buyers who purchased her designs for their stores, assuring them of her innocence and absolute confidence that the lawsuit brought against her by Huffington would be settled quickly and in her favor. He was so engrossed in his work that he was completely unaware that someone had stepped up to his desk until he heard the clearing of a throat. Looking up, he was surprised to see Trowa standing there. The man, dressed in gray pleated pants and awhite shirt beneath a darker gray sport jacket, had obviously come from work. Trowa's face was unusually pale, his expression grim. Setting his own expression to match that of his former boyfriend, Duo looked him in the eyes before returning his attention to the computer screen. "Go away," he said in an acerbic voice.

Trowa, however, was never one to back down from any situations. "You've got some explaining to do, Duo. And since you won't answer your phone or return my messages, you've given me no choice but to come here and speak with you about your conversation with Quatre yesterday."

Duo looked up again, anger blazing in his eyes. "What the hell is Quatre doing talking to you about my session with him? What about protecting my privacy? His credibility as a therapist is shot to hell, again!"

Trowa leaned forward, placing his hands on the desk while his arms braced his upper body. "He told me what had happened between you because I am involved in this mess."

"Not any more." Duo stood up abruptly from his desk, not for any reason other than he just couldn't sit any longer, especially with Trowa looming over him. He fled, in a carefully controlled stride, of course, to the file drawer across the room and began rummaging through it as if he was actually looking for something.

"Duo, listen to me." The other man's voice softened, and from its nearness, he could tell that Trowa had followed him across the room. "I know my leaving hurt you and I've apologized more than once for having fallen in love with Quatre while you and I were still dating. You said you understood, that you had accepted our breakup as well as my relationship with Quatre and that you were happy for me; but it was all a lie, wasn't it?"

Gripping the sides of the file cabinet, Duo fought to keep his temper in check. He didn't want another scene like the one in Quatre's office. No, that wouldn't do in his work place, not with Charise in the next room. Between gritted teeth he answered firmly while keeping his voice down. "I am over you, Trowa. What I can't get over is the betrayal. I trusted Quatre as I trusted you. When he asked if he could meet the man I'd been talking about, the one I was trying so hard to get better for, I didn't see any harm in making that happen. Dammit, Tro, how could you have fallen in love with my shrink? How could he morally or ethically return your feelings knowing how I felt about you? Cutting my heart out with a plastic spoon would have hurt less than what I felt when you confessed what you'd done and then walked out the door."

Closing his eyes, Duo wished the other man would do him one last favor and just disappear. Knowing that wasn't likely to happen, he breathed in deeply before continuing in a voice low enough not to carry into Charise's office. " I must have been out of my mind asking Quatre to take me back as a client. I only did it because I didn't want to rehash more than a year of therapy with someone new. How stupid is that?" He threw up his hands and finally looked at Trowa over his shoulder. "And then came the overtures of friendship: The invitation for dinner on Friday nights, continuing the racket ball games each Tuesday and your acting as if we'd never been anything but friends. You have no idea what torture you've put me through, do you? Can you imagine what it was like for me, watching you and Quatre kissing and hanging off each other, rubbing it in that you were essentially together because he'd let you screw him and I couldn't? Dammit, Tro, how could that be anything but pure torture for me?"

With his chest heaving, Duo forced himself to calm down before he said anything else. Once it was a bit easier to get air into his lungs and he felt like he had a grip on his anger, Duo shook his head, resigned to a course of action he should have taken a long time ago. "I just can't play along anymore, hoping the ache will eventually go away. I meant it when I told Quat that we were finished, professionally and personally. That goes for you and me as well."

"Duo..." Whatever Trowa was about to say was cut short by the sound of someone clearing his throat.

"Excuse me. Am I interrupting?"

Startled, both Duo and Trowa turned around to see an attractive Japanese man dressed smartly in a black designer suit, red tie and briefcase in hand standing in the doorframe. "Mr. Yuy?" Duo was feeling both grateful and flustered by the attorney's unexpected appearance. "I don't think you're scheduled to see Charise this afternoon. Is there a new development in the lawsuit?"

The deep blue eyes moved slowly from the executive assistant to the taller man at his side. Raising one dark eyebrow, Mr. Yuy said to the man, "Perhaps you'll excuse us."

"Goodbye, Trowa." Duo said firmly before the other man had a chance to say anything. The tone of his voice indicated that their parting was going to be final.

The taller man sighed, a sign to Duo that he was giving up the fight. "All right, I'll give you some space, Duo, but I'm not going to give up on our friendship. Believe what you like, but I do care about you, and so does Quatre. I'll call you in a couple of weeks."

Duo refrained from replying, not knowing whether or not he would be willing to speak to either Trowa or Quatre in just a few weeks time. Realizing that he wasn't going to get anything else from him, not even a tiny word of hope that their friendship might make it past this huge hurdle, Trowa gave a nod of his head and turned to leave the room, pausing as he passed the attorney to give him a quick once over before exiting completely.

Relieved by Trowa's more or less forced exit, Duo couldn't help but think that he owed the lawyer for his unwitting help in getting rid of the man and ending their less than pleasant conversation. Glancing aside at Mr. Yuy, he couldn't help acknowledging once again that the lawyer was probably the hottest guy he'd ever seen, surpassing all the actors and models he'd encountered as Charise's assistant. And knowing that Mr. Heero Yuy was even more gorgeous without his clothes than he was in his courtroom appropriate black suit made his breath catch in his throat. Still, there was just something about a man in a well-fitted, expensive business suit, white shirt and power tie that pushed all the right buttons in him.

Catching himself from letting that particular line of thought go any further, he felt his cheeks flush again, but this time it was not a reaction to anger. He was reacting no different than a teenage boy with his first crush, almost salivating over the other man. Get a grip, he told himself. Mr. Yuy had a very low opinion of him and he was pretty sure that it hadn't risen any after he'd walked in on his very personal conversation with Trowa.

"Did you overhear what we were talking about?" he asked, his spine stiffening as he recalled exactly what he and Trowa had been talking about. He walked back to his desk, sat in his chair and pulled off his glasses.

"Not really, but I could tell by your posture and tone of voice that you didn't want the conversation to continue." Mr. Yuy left the doorway and strolled across the room to stand in front of his desk, setting his black leather briefcase on its surface.

"Well, whatever you heard, forget it, all of it. That conversation was personal," Duo said stiffly as he moved his mouse to revive his screen. He really was trying hard not to be rude, but it difficult maintaining his cool when he could feel the other man's eyes on him. Unable to endure that kind of scrutiny another minute, he returned his focus to his computer screen. "And unless this impromptu visit is a dire emergency, I'm afraid Charise is working and can't be disturbed."

"I came here hoping to speak with you."

Duo's wide eyes shot up to the man. "Me? What could you possibly want to talk to me about?" Mr. Yuy's face was completely unreadable, which Duo thought was a pretty handy trick that probably served the lawyer well in the courtroom. He wouldn't be much fun in a poker game, though, not with that inscrutable expression.

"Look," the lawyer began, turning to sit on the edge of the desk. He looked cool and very comfortable, opposite from what Duo was feeling. "You and I met under... well, unusual circumstances, and our second meeting in your boss's office was a bit of a shock, and I didn't react very well. Hell, I was under the impression that you were a prostitute, a once in a lifetime encounter before discovering you were a personal assistant to one of the biggest clients retaining my law firm. I apologize that things were so awkward between us then, but you'll have to admit it was rather shocking, coming face to face like that."

"I thought you were a hooker, too," Duo admitted, with a small, rueful smile.

"I was wondering, would you have lunch with me?"

"Lunch?" Duo blinked in astonishment. "Today?"

The lawyer shrugged. "I figured eating in a public place in the middle of the day would be safe enough. We can talk, maybe get to know each other."

"Ah, I hope you mean getting to know each other in a way different from how we first met."

Mr. Yuy chuckled, and Duo wondered if the man had any idea how sexy that sound was, especially when it was accompanied by an amused smile. No doubt he did know and probably used it to his own advantage. So why did this man's presence, and hell, just about everything else about him, have such an effect on him? Returning the smile simply because he couldn't help it, Duo's heart tripped when their eyes met and he began to feel more than a little warm under the collar. Quickly looking away, Duo had an idea that the other man was dangerous. Dangerous because, given the chance, there stood a very real possibility that he might lose his heart to the handsome lawyer. Hadn't he learned from the past what a bad idea it was to fall in love? Love meant pain. He'd loved his parents, his cousin, his aunt and uncle, and he'd lost them all, with the exception of his aunt, and even that relationship was strained. And every time he'd come close to giving his heart to someone he felt he could rely on and trust, he'd he been rejected or hurt so badly it had taken him long, agonizing months to recover?

Mentally shaking himself, he recalled that this was not the time for getting up close and personal, not with all the other shit that was coming down around him. Not only was work stressful, but he was now estranged from his friends and the humiliating scene on Saturday night at the Palomino had made it clear he still had some personal issues to work on. "I don't know," he hedged, already sounding apologetic. "I'm kind of in a bad place right now, dealing with some personal issues. I don't think this is a good time for me to get involved with anyone."

"It's just lunch," the other man replied, sounding reasonable. "We can go Dutch if you're worried about commitment." The left corner of Heero's mouth twitched upward, hinting that an amused smile was fighting to make its appearance.

Duo's more rational side began battling with an aching desire to do whatever the man sitting on his desk wanted. Mr. Yuy had become the phantom lover featured in his most recent dreams, fueled by the memory of the hot tub and the fantasy of the incredible cowboy he'd given his virginity to. The strong attraction he felt towards the man was undeniable. It was possibly the strongest pull he'd ever experienced towards another human being. But his past relationships had only led to heartache. What made him think this man would be any different from the other guys he'd dated and lost? Had the lawyer honestly come all the way to his office with the sole intent of getting to know him better? Or did he have some ulterior motive at work? Like getting close to Charise's assistant for his own gain? No! He stopped himself from going any further with that train of thought. Truth be told, he was scared. Scared shitless to trust another person with his fragile heart. But he wanted to take a chance again, with the man sitting on the edge of his desk, waiting for his answer. But was Mr. Heero Yuy worth it? Was there more to the lawyer, the man, than being the hottest guy he had ever seen?

He had just about decided to play it safe by telling the man that he wasn't ready to date when the lawyer leaned over the desk and whispered, "Come on. What are you afraid of? Me? I'm the real thing, Duo, someone you should take a chance on. You can trust me."

Looking into the deep blue eyes gazing at him so intently, he wondered if he was being fed a line by a slick lawyer or if maybe, hopefully, Mr. Heero Yuy was the real thing.

"That's the problem," Duo replied soberly, cringing at the slight tremble in his voice. "Right now I don't know that I can trust you, or anyone else for that matter."

"Nothing ventured, nothing gained," the lawyer said with a challenging wink.

Leave it to a lawyer to find another of his weaknesses; he rarely could he ignore a challenge. It was just lunch after all, what harm could there be in that? "All right, lunch it is." He looked at the clock on his computer and was surprised to see it was nearly twelve forty five. "Let me tell Charise I'm leaving and see if she wants me to pick something up for her." He promptly saved the changes and closed the page he'd been working on then rose from his desk and approached the closed door belonging to his boss.

Ten minutes later they were being lead to a booth at Tony's Delicatessen. Duo passed by the place almost every day, but he couldn't recall having eaten there before. It appeared, however, that his lunch companion had frequented the small restaurant regularly, a conclusion he came to after witnessing the friendly reception the dark haired man got and the table they were immediately led to.

"Come here often?" he asked with a slight grin as he slid into the red vinyl booth.

"A couple times a month," the lawyer answered, carefully setting his briefcase beneath the table.

"The staff seem to know you well enough."

With a wink the other man replied, "I tip well," and Duo thought Mr. Yuy's smile was nothing short of spellbinding. With straight white teeth, it was obvious the lawyer had good oral hygiene, one of the top points on his list for when he considered having a closer relationship with someone. He blinked, startled at realizing that he was already mentally checking off the list he used when assessing someone as a future partner. Even though he knew very little about the guy, Heero Yuy seemed to meet most of the requirements on that list, namely: being intelligent, gainfully employed, good looking, healthy and a great kisser. He blushed at the memory of the kisses they'd shared in the hot tub. Of course there were other essential character traits he had on his list, but only time would tell if the man sitting across from him met those criteria as well.

The purpose of creating the list in the first place was to aid him in taking stock of the person he was interested in, to help him decided whether or not he could trust the man with his secret. What a relief it was that he didn't have that debilitating intimacy problem anymore. He decided then and there to keep an open mind about the man sitting across from him, and to wait, at least until after lunch, to decide whether or not he could possibly trust him with another date and, potentially, his heart.

"Let's start again properly." The lawyer reached his hand across the table and introduced himself, "Heero Yuy."

Duo grinned and placed his hand in the other's, giving him a firm handshake. "Duo Maxwell. Nice to meet you."

"Hello, Mr. Yuy." A pretty, dark-haired woman in her mid twenties placed two glasses of water before them, then stood in front of the table clutching several menus to her chest. Duo thought she looked at home in the Italian restaurant, and with her dark skin and eyes, peasant blouse, skirt and checkered scarf and apron, he could envision her stomping barefoot in a wine barrel filled with ripe purple grapes, oozing between her toes.

"Hello, Sophia. How's the new baby?"

The woman's face glowed as she answered. "Very well, thank you. The little guy is six months old now," she added while handing both men a menu. In a very professional but easy manner, she began listing the specials of the day. Heero ordered the spaghetti with clam sauce, and Duo requested cheese ravioli topped with an Alfredo sauce.

As their waitress left to put the order up, Duo turned his attention back to Heero. He felt his cheeks heat up after finding the other man's eyes focused on him and a smile on his face. "So, what do you want to talk about?" he asked.

"Tell me about yourself," Heero said, settling against the back of his seat. "Where did you grow up, go to school? Tell me about your family. When did you know you were gay?" He leaned forward again and said in an intimate, seductive way, "Tell me everything, Duo."

The braided man couldn't help but grin. "This is an hour lunch, right?"

Heero glanced at his watch. "Forty minutes, actually."

"Then I guess I better tell you the short version." Duo was beginning to relax and actually enjoy the other man's company. "I was born in San Francisco but basically grew up in San Jose," he began. "My parents were killed in car crash when I was eight and my aunt, my only living blood relative, took me in to live with her and her family. It was hard at first, but after a year or so living with my Aunt Helen, her husband Frank and my cousin Natalie I began to feel like I belonged, that I had a family again. Shortly after I turned twelve everything changed. My cousin died in a freak accident. I don't remember much about it, because it was not so long a time after my parents' accident and I kind of blocked it out in order to deal with it. My aunt and uncle were devastated. Everything changed in our home. My aunt cried a lot and my uncle began spending a lot of time away from home and I was left by myself a lot. The year I turned thirteen, my uncle was gone and Aunt Helen divorced him. She wouldn't discuss it with me, but I think my uncle was cheating on her. I saw several bills come in the mail from a private investigator, so I can only guess that was how she found out. She never got over it."

Looking up, Duo could see that the other man was listening to him, but it was hard to judge from his face and lack of comments just what he was thinking. He continued, wanting to push forward and not dwell too much on his past. What he really wanted was to learn more about the man he'd formerly known as Tex.

"Of course I stayed with my aunt and never saw Uncle Frank again, which was sad because he'd always been very nice to me, took me fishing, to the go-cart race track. He was fun. I was your normal teenager, had friends, did well in most subjects in school, had a girlfriend or two, but only because they asked me to go with them rather than me having any interest. Still, they were good friends, even though they couldn't figure out why I didn't try to do anything more than kiss them. I didn't really get it either until my senior year, and it was then I knew I was gay."

"How did that happen?" Heero asked, his face relaxed but he was obviously listening to every word he uttered.

"I was on the school paper and was asked to cover the swim team's meet when the regular person reporting on it was absent from school. Let's just say that my reaction to watching guys parade around in Speedos was pretty damn telling of my sexual orientation. It suddenly made sense why I hadn't been lusting after the girls in school like the other guys, though I'd put up a good front in order to be accepted. It was a day of illumination and heartache."

"Heartache?"

"I realized that I was the very thing my aunt loathed. I'm not going to go into it, but from the time I turned fourteen she'd hammered into my brain the evils of homosexuality. The effects of her lectures stayed with me a long time."

"Does she know you're gay?"

Duo nodded. "Yes, but she's in denial, still hoping I'll find a nice young woman to settle down with. She blames my working in the fashion industry for my sexual preference."

"Anyway," he continued, changing the subject. "I left home as soon as possible, drawing from a trust fund set up from my parents' life insurance policies to pay for my studies at U.C.L.A. I majored in business with a minor in education. I got a job at DuFrame, Inc. right out of school as an assistant for a minor assistant. The long and the short of it is that I caught Charise's eye and was promoted more for my looks rather than my abilities, but it's my office and organizational skills that keeps me in the position of Charise's assistant."

Heero gave him an appreciative look and said, "I can understand how you caught her eye, but who was the guy you were arguing with earlier?"

"Former boyfriend. End of subject." Duo said with a look that indicated he meant it. Then relaxing enough to give Heero another smile, he added, "Now, it's your turn."

"All right." Heero leaned forward, resting one elbow on the table and setting his chin on his upraised hand. "I was born in Chicago, a product of sperm donation to a lesbian couple. My moms moved to Montana when I was three. We lived on a ranch that one set of grandparents owned. They broke up when I was five. Mom stayed at the ranch and raised me in Montana and Mema moved back to Chicago, where I visited her every summer. I stayed on good terms with both of them and can honestly say that my life was never dull.

"I was thirteen when I figured out I was gay, and sixteen when I had my first sexual experience with an older boy I met at the movies in Chicago. Mema freaked out when the manager from the theater called my home after catching me and this other guy in the bathroom. She immediately phoned one of her gay friends who arrived moments after I walked through the front door. He sat down with us and lectured me on the importance of using protection while my mom and her latest girlfriend sandwiched me between them on the sofa, adding their two bits after every sentence. I learned what the term hell on earth meant that day. I was more careful about my activities after that.

"After high school I went to Chicago and stayed with Mema while I attended the university there, then transferred to the University of Connecticut for law school. I was hired by my present firm upon graduation. Winning several high-profile cases that fell into my lap when one of the partners developed a severe case of kidney stones, propelled my career forward and I was made an associate of the firm, which brings me to the here and now."

"So you grew up on a ranch in Montana, huh?" Duo asked with a slow grin. "That explains why you looked so natural sitting on the fence. At first I thought you were a cowboy."

"And you'd never ridden a horse before, had you?" Heero was smiling, his eyes alight with mirth. "Even from a distance I could see the death grip you had on the saddle horn."

"Did you..." Duo's question was cut short when their meal arrived. The waitress placed their plates in front of them and asked if they wanted something more to drink than the water they had. Heero ordered iced tea and Duo a coke.

Several moments passed as they sampled their meals, then Heero asked, "What were you about to ask?"

The braided man looked up from his plate, bemused. "Huh, I can't remember." It wasn't like him to lose his train of thought, but it was understandable considering the handsome man sitting across the table, distracting the hell out of him. The smell of Heero's cologne was very appealing, and the man's air of confidence was doing funny things to his body, not to mention the way he hummed after taking the first bite of his food, obviously enjoying it. The whole package named Heero Yuy was most definitely turning him on. That pleasurable hum brought back the memory of the wonderful sounds the other man had made in a hot tub hundreds of miles away from Los Angeles.

"We were talking about when I first saw you, clinging to your horse for dear life" Heero said helpfully, trying to jog his memory.

Oh, yeah, he remembered now. Turning his eyes back to his plate of food, Duo tried not to appear as nervous as he felt when he asked. "I know it probably sounds stupid, given where we were at the time, but did you follow me into the house, or did you find me in the hot tub by chance?"

By sound alone he could tell that Heero had stopped eating, that he wasn't moving. Looking up through the fringe of hair that partially covered his eyes, he could see that Heero had been waiting for him to do just that. Leaning forward so that what he was about to say wouldn't be overheard, the dark haired man with the beautiful blue eyes said in a low voice, "Even from the distance that separated us, I saw you look my way, and I knew in an instant that you were something special. I couldn't take my eyes off of you. Your braid, draped over your shoulder, lured me in as surely as a siren singing to unsuspecting sailors at sea. You stole my breath away.

"I tried my best not to be obvious while I watched you dismount your horse and limp into the house with the aid of the girl you rode with. Then there was nothing else to do but wait and see what would happen next. Ten minutes later, you still hadn't reappeared, so I followed you inside. I waited at the front desk until a woman looking like a blond Daisy Duke came from down the hall. When I asked where you'd gone, she winked at me and told me that you were having a massage and then a soak in one of the hot tubs in the back garden. She directed me to wait for you in the bar. So I ordered a drink and wondered what I would say to you if we did come face to face. My only intention at that point was to see you up close. And then I caught a glimpse of you exiting a room off the hallway, and you were wearing a yellow robe that made it so easy to follow you as you made your way to the back garden area."

"So you did follow me," Duo concluded, liking the idea that he'd captured the attention of this very attractive man who, in his opinion, could have anyone he wanted.

Heero's smile was unrepentant. "I'd have been a fool not to follow."

Duo returned the grin, then put a fork full of food into his mouth. He liked this guy, probably too much. And then another random thought came to him. With some hesitance he said, "Um... despite the way we met, I want you to know that I don't usually act that way. I'm not one of those guys who indiscriminately sleeps around. I'm cautious. Very cautious, if you know what I mean." He hoped the other man did understand because he sure as hell didn't want to go into any further details about it in a public room.

The lawyer wore an expression of understanding. "Been hurt a few times?"

"More times than I care to count," he answered, feeling the ache that always came with the fact that he'd failed in all his previous relationships because of his problems. Maybe he was just a lost cause.

"The guy in your office, did he hurt you?"

Duo took a moment to debate about whether or not he should talk about his past, or about Trowa. He could hear Quatre saying that the past, and how you react to it, is what makes you who you are, the good as well as the bad. Talking about it to some degree was good, but that didn't mean you had to tell everyone, just a selected few. Was Heero one of the "selected few"? He paused to seriously study the man across from him. Damn, he was easy on the eyes, and Heero appeared to be focused solely on him and patiently waiting for him to answer his question.

Not sure if it was a good idea to open up to Heero or not, he was a bit surprised to find that he wanted to. "Yes. Trowa was my last boyfriend. It's been a while now since he left me, but the reason for his leaving hurt. He's moved on, but I can't quite forgive him."

"He left you for another?"

With a sigh, Duo nodded. "For my shrink."

Heero's eyes widened with disbelief. "The bastard," he muttered just under his breath as he leaned back in his seat.

"Yeah. Both of them," Duo agreed. The mood at the table had definitely changed and the braided man felt his earlier enthusiasm begin to wane.

"I'm sorry," said Heero.

"Nothing for you to be sorry for," Duo shrugged. "My shrink obviously offered him something that I couldn't, and Trowa went for it. Just the other day I came to the realization that I really wasn't over their betrayal, even though I'd been acting like I was, maintaining our friendships and seeing them weekly. I told my shrink yesterday, rather emphatically in fact, that our professional relationship was over and that I didn't want to see either him or Trowa again socially. That's why Trowa came to my office. He wants me to believe that he cares about our friendship, and I'm sure he'd like to salvage it, but I just can't take it any more."

"Wait a minute," Heero interrupted. "Let me get this straight. You continued seeing your shrink even after he'd stolen your boyfriend?" Heero looked and sounded both shocked and appalled.

Again Duo shrugged. "I thought the guy was helping me, or at least I hoped he was. Actually, it was through me that he and Trowa met. He told me he wanted to meet the guy I was trying so hard to get better for."

And then it dawned on Duo that he had made a horrible mistake. He had led the conversation to the point where Heero would logically inquire about just what the hell was wrong with him that he had to see a shrink. "Ah, Let's change the subject, all right. It's getting a bit too depressing for a lunch date."

He could see by the expression on Heero's face that he had more questions to ask. Yet the lawyer earned himself another point for merely nodding, agreeing to his request. "So tell me, what type of activities do you enjoy when you're not at work, assuming you do have time off?"

The rest of the lunch hour passed by pleasantly. They stayed focused on subjects more suited for an afternoon get together. After insisting on paying for lunch and signing his credit card, settling the bill, Heero looked at his watch and with a smile of apology said, "I've got to get back to the office. Thank you for accepting my invitation to lunch."

"I should thank you," Duo replied with a grin. Then placing his napkin on the tabletop he added, "This was nice, but I think you learned more about me this afternoon than I did about you."

"Then what do you say to getting together again? I promise to tell you all about my childhood adventures on a Montana horse ranch and maybe even about my slightly sordid college years."

"Slightly sordid?" Duo grinned. How bad could the now respectable lawyer have been? "You've piqued my interest."

Heero stood and immediately moved around the table to stand at the side of Duo's chair, preventing him from rising. He bent over and said softly, "How about we continue this at my apartment tonight? I'll make dinner and you can be dessert."

It was if a bucket of cold water, filled with crushed ice had been thrown on him. After having told the man he was cautious about relationships, had been hurt more than his fair share, the lawyer seemed only interested in getting into his pants. Duo closed his eyes, trying but failing to block out the voice of his aunt telling him that men who preyed on other men wanted nothing more than sex, and after accomplishing that goal they would move on to someone else. "I'm sorry, I've got plans for tonight," he said in a chilly voice.

"Then how about tomorrow night?"

"Sorry."

Heero took a step back, wearing a look of confusion. "What's wrong?"

Duo quickly took advantage of the opening and jumped to his feet. "I've got to get back to work. Thanks for the lunch."

He made a move to pass the other man, but the hand that firmly gripped his upper arm stopped him. "Duo, what's wrong? What did I say to offend you?"

With a voice barely audible but as cold as an Arctic gale, he answered. "You obviously didn't listen to a word I said, and I'd thank you to let go of me so we don't cause a scene in public." The hand released him immediately, and Duo shot out of the restaurant like the hounds of hell were on his heels, and considering Heero's reputation as a lawyer, maybe they were, or at least one of them.

TBC

Note: Sorry for the delay. It's the holidays, what can I say? Thanks for your patience. My long-time proofreader is due to have her first baby in about two weeks. I'm very excited for her. I'm not sure what that's going to mean for updates, but once a routine settles in I'm sure we'll get the rest of this story out. Thanks for reading, everyone.


	10. Chapter 10

**The Pretender  
Chapter 10**

Without looking back to see if Heero was following, Duo high-tailed it out of the restaurant and returned posthaste to his workplace. His face felt flushed and he was overly warm by the time he finally reached his office. His mad rush back to the office had served to turn his anger at Heero's insensitivity to a feeling of disappointment. Flopping down into his chair, he reached over and turned on his computer, pausing as it booted up to collect his thoughts. Planting his elbows on the desktop, he buried his face in his hands, berating himself for being a fool. Dammit, he'd wanted Heero to be different, someone who would take time to get to know him before trying to land him in bed. What a damn fool he was.

Trying to look at things from the other man's point of view, he supposed it made sense that Heero, who by his own admission had a lot more experience with sex, would make advances so early in their acquaintance. And if the man read more into actions than words, hadn't he given him a completely different message at their first meeting in the hot tub at the whore house, which had been all about sex? Hadn't he acted like a whore and given the man whatever he wanted? Heero didn't know at the time, and was still ignorant of the fact, that what he gave him that day just happened to he'd something he'd never given to anyone else before. Was it any wonder Heero thought he might be able to persuade him into jumping into his bed after their short but pleasant lunch? After all, he'd be a liar to deny the obvious, that he and Heero were attracted to each other and the rapport between them seemed too incredible to believe.

Was it possible he hadn't clearly communicated to the lawyer that he didn't take relationships lightly? Or could it be that Heero had simply been teasing when he made the comment about him being dessert? He'd taken the offhand comment the wrong way?

So many questions and so few answers. Damn, he was a total screw-up when it came to dating.

It seemed Dorothy had been right. In spite of his new non-virgin status, nothing had really changed. He was still messed up. Why in the world did he think things would be different now, easier somehow simply because he'd had sex? Well, call him a dumb shit twice over, because that is exactly what he had believed. Even though he'd made it past that previously insurmountable hurdle of having sex, he knew his ultimate goals remained firm; to be in a committed, long-term if not life-long relationship. Maybe he was delusional, wanting to share his life exclusively with another man, give all that he had to offer to someone who was going to be as committed to him as he would be to them.

Without a doubt it had been his parents' example that had formed his desire for the same kind of committed relationship they'd enjoyed. From his earliest recollections he'd recognized the deep and abiding love his Mom and Dad had shared. Their home had been filled with love and laughter and a happiness he hadn't known since their deaths. Was it wrong to want that same kind of relationship and happiness for himself? Knowing how good being with someone could be, how could he possibly settle for anything less?

He hadn't needed a shrink to tell him the sudden loss of his parents, and thus the loss of his familiar and loving home, had left him with abandonment issues, though in the past couple of years he had worked very hard on over coming them. And regardless of the fact that his aunt and her family had welcomed him into their home and had loved and cared for him, they couldn't keep those fears of being abandoned from being reinforced when the accidental death of his cousin shocked them all, and then his uncle's made a sudden departure. It seemed that each time he'd begun to start trusting and hoping again, someone he cared about left him, causing his fears and insecurities to overrun his life once again.

Sometime during the past six month of sessions, he and Quatre had discussed the possibility that his inability to have sex might not stem entirely from his aunt's lecturing on the evils of homosexuality. Quatre believed there could be another underlying reason for his problems and suggested that he might be subconsciously protecting himself from the possibility of being abandoned by putting up a protective barrier. His fear of sex, his former shrink rationalized, would successfully keep all potential partners at arm's length, thus minimizing the potential for being hurt. Sex with a partner would mean a greater emotional connection, thus a greater chance of being devastated if the other man left him.

With all of his hang ups Duo had wondered often whether or not he was even capable of being in a relationship like the one his parents had. Yet in spite of his doubts he couldn't help craving the kind of happiness he knew, from their example, was possible.

His mind shifted back to his when his trouble began, his first attempt at being intimate with another guy. In all honestly, at this point in time he couldn't remember if the guy's name was Dan or Nathaniel, or maybe is was Daniel or Nat. Not that it mattered now, but seven years ago, when he had been a freshman in college, it had been a very big deal to have sex for the first time. Or it would have been if he hadn't wigged out and experienced the first of many panic attacks. From that first attempt a vicious cycle ensued of dating someone new, panicking when the guy went a little bit too far, and soon after, if not immediately, losing them when they realized he couldn't have sex with them and they lost interest in him. So here he was, seven years down the road from then, not to mention the thousands of dollars he'd spent in therapy, and he still couldn't seem to get past his irrational reaction to someone trying to seduce him.

After having sex with Tex, he had been certain his life would change for the better, that all his inhibitions about sex would be gone. What a kick in the ass it was to realize that even after this huge obstacle of not being able to have sex had been overcome, his life hadn't improved all that much. So the question to ask now, he decided, was, _Am I really cured_? Was he really over his problem or was his encounter with Tex a one-time thing, a fluke? God, he hoped not. But now that he was thinking about it, he hadn't reacted well to Wufei's attempt to seduce him- which was really understandable, seeing that the guy was a prick - and his reaction to Heero's suggestion at lunch had been immediate. Should he have handled those situations differently? The night at the Palomino with Wufei was completely justifiable, but was he wrong to be offended by Heero's attempt to woo him into his bed this early in their acquaintance?

He honestly didn't know the answers to those questions, and the number of people he might have spoken to about this problem had diminished greatly over the past few days. Quatre and Trowa were out of the question, as were Charise and his so co-workers. So he'd have to figure things out for himself from now on or find yet another shrink. That was an option he didn't even want to think about.

Reviewing his options, there was only one left to him. He'd have to talk to Dorothy, though he felt hesitant about going to her. Sure, she had helped him to physically and mentally prepare for having sex, but did he trust her enough to ask her advice about relationships or if he had reacted too strongly to Heero's not so subtle suggestion for the evening? No, he wasn't sure she'd understand his hesitation about jumping into Heero's bed. He knew he shouldn't judge, but it seemed to him that the blond sex therapist had the morals of an alley cat. Perhaps the nature of her job had helped form his opinion of her. Added to that, she knew, or had personal knowledge of, just about everyone in the city. Intimate knowledge. During their occasional out-of-session lunches or a rare get together to take in a movie, she'd spoken rather freely about herself and some of her past relationships, not naming names, of course, but giving him the impression that she'd happily bedded a good number of men. He could only guess that having sex with an expert on the subject might be a real turn on for some men. Having seen with his own eyes how popular Dorothy was with men when they were in public together, there was little doubt the woman practiced what she taught.

It was just his opinion, but he couldn't help but feel that anyone who slept around as much as Dorothy had couldn't possibly understand why a person like himself wouldn't want to do the same.

Realizing his mind had wandered too far off the subject of Heero Yuy, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly, conceding to himself that Heero could be, in spite of his saying otherwise, under the impression that he was easy, considering his behavior back at the House on the Hill. Good lord, he could hear his aunt's voice now, listing promiscuity as one of the evils of homosexuality. That was bullshit, he knew, having personally known men and women who were committed to their lovers, who believed in fidelity. That thought brought to mind Quatre and Trowa. It hurt knowing that they had what he craved: a monogamous, loving and committed relationship. Maybe that was the real reason he'd been unable to get over Trowa falling in love with his shrink. To be honest, he was jealous of them, and that was something he would only admit to himself.

The intercom speaker softly clicked on and startled him from his thoughts. "Duo. Have you finished that letter yet?" Charise's voice, coming from a tiny speaker, sounded harried. "The secretary at Perry's office called and stated that Mr. Yuy would like to look over the finished draft before you send it out. Could you bring me a copy, if you're done, so I can look it over before you deliver it to him."

Of course Charise's request could not have come at a worse time. He clicked on the speaker button and answered. "Almost done. I'll bring it in to you in a few minutes."

"Thank you, dear," she replied and the soft click signaled she'd turned her intercom off.

"Shit," he muttered under his breath, then bought up the unfinished letter and turned his thoughts away from his personal problems and back to the task at hand.

Thirty minutes later, Duo held the typed letter in a manilla envelope against his chest while riding the elevator up to the sixteenth floor of the prestigious Library Tower building, home to the offices of Harrison, Rhodes and Associates. He still couldn't understand why Charise hadn't simply let him email the letter to Heero's secretary. His boss was one of those rare individuals who preferred sending hand written letters and notes instead of using the more efficient electronic communication devices. Since Mr. Yuy's office was relatively close by and he had made the request, she'd insisted he deliver the letter personally to him, and then carry it back with any corrections that he might deem necessary. His plan was to leave the envelope with Heero's secretary and then hightail it out of there the moment she returned it back into his hands again. In light of how he and the other man had parted at the restaurant a little more than an hour ago, the last thing he wanted was to have a face to face encounter with the good looking lawyer. Crap, just thinking about seeing Heero Yuy had him feeling jittery, in an excited, anticipating kind of way. Damn, he had it so bad for the man. He tried to push those feelings down by concentrating on the box above the doors and the steadily increasing red digital numbers that appeared on it as the elevator moved slowly upwards.

He held his breath as the number sixteen appeared and the car slowed to a stop. The soft ding announced the car's arrival and the door slid open. He exited, hoping that he didn't look as nervous as he felt. He now regretted not having gone against Charise's wishes and hired a delivery service to bring the important letter to Heero. But his boss had insisted he deliver it himself, saying that she trusted him and no one else to place it in the hands of her lawyer.

Having been to these offices several times before, delivering something to Perry from Charise, Duo knew to turn right and enter the second door to his left. He entered the reception area, which was bright and cheery with impressive landscape paintings donning the walls. He wondered if the welcoming decor was designed to try and calm clients who knew full well how much speaking to a lawyer of this firm was going to cost them.

He strolled up to the desk and greeted the woman who had been a secretary at the firm for many years, from what Mr. Rhodes had said in passing one day. She smiled warmly at him and he held out the envelope. "This is from Charise DuFrame for Mr. Yuy," he stated in his most business-like manner.

"Oh yes," she grinned pleasantly. "He's expecting you." She ignored the held-out envelope as she stood from her chair and motioned for him to follow. _Shit and double shit_, Duo swore to himself. "I really have to get back to the office. Can't you give this to him?"

The older woman gave him a cursory glance. "I was under the impression that the papers were to be hand delivered to Mr. Yuy. Is that correct?" With a slump of his shoulders Duo nodded. "This way," she directed, then led him to a closed door with a plaque at eye level designating the office of Mr. Heero Yuy, Attorney at Law. After a gentle tap on the door, she put her hand on the knob, turned it and pushed it open, motioning for him to step inside. He grudgingly entered the room and found those deep blue eyes he'd admired during lunch staring at him once again.

Heero stood and held his hand out for the folder, then looked over Duo's shoulder to the woman at the door. "Thank you, Anne. You can shut the door. I'll have Mr. Maxwell wait in here while I read this over."

The older woman nodded before complying. As soon as the door shut behind her, Heero lowered his hand and moved from behind his desk, ignoring the proffered envelope being held out to him to grab its carrier by the shoulders. "What the hell went wrong back at the restaurant, Duo? What did I say that turned you off so completely? I thought we were connecting. You can't deny that we're attracted to each other, so I can only guess that my asking you to my place for dinner tonight upset you in some way that made you shut me out completely."

"It wasn't dinner," Duo replied, avoiding looking at the other man's face, focusing rather on the knot in his tie. "It was your comment about me being dessert. You obviously didn't listen to me this afternoon or understand from our conversation that I don't do casual sex."

There was a long pause, but the grip on his shoulders didn't lessen. "I'm confused," Heero admitted. "You say you're not into casual sex, but what the hell was that in the hot tub if not casual?"

Duo took that moment to look up and saw for himself a look of confusion on Heero's face. "I don't know," he reluctantly admitted. "I was relaxing after a massage and daydreaming about what it must be like to work in a place like that. After seeing you sitting on the fence, dressed like a cowboy, I conjured you up in my mind, and put you in a story set in the 1800's and a whore named Laredo, who had just come from San Francisco to work there. Your showing up when you did coincided with my fantasy of being Laredo, and you became an unknowing part of it when you introduced yourself as Tex. You were perfectly cast as a cowboy who had just off the range, ready and willing to spend his pay." He stopped himself from saying anything more, feeling embarrassed by his confession and not wanting to admit how badly he'd wanted to have sex that day, to finally give up his virgin state.

Heero released his hold on Duo's shoulders and let his hands drop to his side. "So you were fantasizing the whole time?"

"Well, maybe not the whole time." Duo blushed. "I think I forget about the fantasy when you, ah... you know."

Heero sighed and brought a hand up to scratch beneath his dark hair, messing it up even more. Looking confused he said, "I can't say that I understand you, Duo."

"Join the club," he muttered under his breath.

Heero shook his head and a small grin twitched at the corners of his lips. "But I do know that I want to understand. I like you, Duo. I'm strongly attracted to you and, yes, I'd like to take you to bed."

"But don't you see?" Duo implored. "That's the problem. I liked how it felt when we were together in that hot tub, but I don't want sex to be the only reason you want to be with me. I want and need more than that kind of transitory relationship. I've had my share of failed relationships. What I really want is to fall in love with someone who wants only me, and to trust them not to leave me. That's maybe even more important to me than the physical act of intimacy. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm looking for a real relationship, not just a good time in bed."

Thinking he'd said too much, Duo stepped back. "Listen, I'm sorry. Maybe I'm just a romantic fool. And hell, you're right, I gave the impression that I just wanted sex in that hot tub. I was kind of desperate at the time. But the fact is, we barely know each other and I'm probably scaring you away by being honest with you. I'm not going to jump into your bed, at least not yet. I like you, Heero, but if all you want from me is sex then it's better for us to just shake hands and say goodbye." He shifted the envelope from his right hand to his left in order to extend it out for the farewell handshake, a lump forming in his throat.

Heero glanced down at his hand, but for a long moment he made no move to take it, looking as if he were considering some great decision. Finally, he reached out and slid his palm over Duo's and clasped their hands together. But instead of shaking hands, Heero tugged Duo forward. Before he could question the man, he found himself being kissed. Heero's lips were indescribably talented and persuasive as well, for without too much effort they coaxed his mouth open and he accepted the questing tongue into his mouth. For his part, he tried to keep from reacting to Heero's sudden move, not knowing what the lawyer's intentions were, but when a gentle hand cradled the back of his head and tilted it just so, gaining better access to his mouth, his knees almost buckled and all of his reservations went flying out the window. Without any inhibition whatsoever he kissed the man back with all the fervor he possessed.

Heero retreated slightly, allowing Duo to take over the kiss. It was a toe curling, cock-hardening and breathtaking kiss that seemed to have no end. It was Heero who finally pulled back, leaving Duo gasping, hanging onto his neck and wanting more. As the lawyer's forehead came to rest on his own, he whispered, "Did the earth just stop turning?"

"It did for me," Duo answered softly, licking his lips and enjoying the last remnants of the kiss.

"We would be fools to say goodbye to that, don't you think?"

Unable to nod with Heero's forehead pressed against his own, Duo answered with a breathy, "Yes. But is this all there is?"

"I can only tell you that from the moment I met you I've wanted to know everything about you. I want to be near you. I'm completely mesmerized by you, Duo. Isn't that enough for a beginning?"

Duo thought about it. Wasn't this how dating was suppose to work? The attraction and curiosity about someone, the desire and thrill of something new along with the uncertainty of the outcome? In that light, he guessed it was enough. He and Heero had all of that going and maybe even more. "Yes, it's enough for a beginning."

Heero smiled and pushed a long stray hair back behind Duo's ear. "Maybe we can talk about this more tonight? I'll make dinner if you'll bring the wine. We'll take things one step at a time and see where this is going, all right?"

Duo couldn't stop his heart from feeling hopeful. Was this gorgeous man actually willing to give him a chance, after he'd more or less laid it on the line what he wanted? Maybe deep down, Heero wanted a committed relationship too and just hadn't found the right person. He could only hope that was the truth. "Red or white wine?" he asked.

"What do you prefer?"

Duo grinned. "I'm not much of a drinker, preferring caffeinated colas to wine. But if you tell me what to bring, I'll do my best to find it."

"A red Bordeaux is always nice, and bring along whatever else you prefer," Heero answered. "Dinner will be ready at seven. Let me write down the directions to my place." But before turning back to his desk he gave Duo another short kiss and a smile that showed he was pleased with how things had turned out.

The braided man eventually left the offices of Harrington, Rhodes and Associates with the approved letter in his hand and a grin on his face that would last the rest of the afternoon.

**TBC**

Note: Sorry I'm so slow at getting this out. I don't think I've had ten minutes to myself this week. Still waiting on baby news from my beta. I'll keep you updated, and thanks to all those who sent well wishes her way in your reviews. That was very nice of you. ^_^


	11. Chapter 11

**The Pretender  
Chapter 11**

After going to his apartment after work to freshen up and change, Duo made a mad dash to the address on the back of Heero's business card and soon stood before door 612 a few short hours after leaving Heero's office. A glance at his watch showed he was five minutes early. Would Heero think he was too eager if he knocked on his door now? Damn, he didn't want to appear overly eager, or worse, desperate. It didn't help matters that he could hardly stand still, a result of being anxious, excited and... well, as hopeful about the man on the other side of the door.

Of course he'd experienced similar feelings before, usually at the onset of a new relationship. He'd dated a bit during and after college, well, he'd had plenty of first dates. Only a few of the guys he'd gone out with had agreed to go along with his suggestion of going slow and getting to know each other, and even fewer had been told the reason behind that request. After all, he needed to know and trust someone to some extent before telling them about his intimacy problem.

With his left hand holding the bag containing the items he'd purchased after work, he wiped his right hand on his pants hoping his palms weren't sweating. He remembered this part of dating also, but the nervous excitement he was feeling at the moment somehow seemed different from other times, and there was no doubt that the difference was Heero. The man made his heart race, made him hope for... for more than what he'd ever had before. Now standing in front of the lawyer's door, he had the distinct feeling that he was about to embark on a dangerous yet thrilling venture. It was his heart that was at risk here. Heero, he thought, just might be the one he'd been hoping to find.

Shaking his head, he put a stop to that kind of thinking. He was getting ahead of himself, especially this early in the game. What he needed to do now was take the first of many steps towards forming a relationship with the man behind the door in front of him. He would be cautious, he promised himself, and could only hope the risks would be worth it in the long run.

Inhaling deeply, he held his breath to the count of ten then slowly let it out and reached out to knock on the door. Then shoving his free hand into his pocket he ordered his racing heart to slow the hell down. After all, this was just a date, not a world changing event. He had absolutely nothing to be anxious about. Heero had asked him out, seemed interested, and that was a great start. Then Heero opened the door and smiled at him with all the warmth of a summer's day, and Duo couldn't help but hope that this gorgeous man was indeed "the one".

Heero welcomed him as he stepped back and motioned for him to enter his apartment. Duo complied, eyeing his host as he moved through the doorway, appreciating how hot the man looked in slightly faded Levis and a dark blue T-shirt that hugged his upper torso to perfection. As busy as lawyers were purported to be, this one definitely found some time to spend in a gym. Heero gave him the once-over also, with a pleased look in his eyes. Black jeans and dark gray oxford shirt had been a good choice after all.

The moment the front door closed, Duo found firmly pushed back and pressed up against it with Heero's lips covering his own. He didn't know how long they stood there, but they enjoyed the hell out of themselves before parting. Heero smiled at him. "Damn, you taste as good as you look."

"Thanks," he said, returning the smile though he mentally winced at the lame reply. Surely he could come up with something better than that, something more sophisticated or worldly. He handed Heero the bag he'd been carrying. "I picked up some red wine for you and a cherry cola for me. I hope you don't mind, but I also brought some ice cream for dessert."

"Thanks," Heero set the bag in his left arm like he was carrying a football while putting the other arm around Duo's waist. He then proceeded to lead him further into his apartment.

So far, so good.

"Something smells great," Duo commented with a grin. "I can't believe you actually had time to cook after work. What are you, a renaissance man? A capable attorney by day and a hot, romantic chef by night?"

Heero chuckled. "I'll admit to the attorney part, and I'll have to accept your judgment on my being 'hot'. With some effort I can be a romantic, but I'm afraid I'll never be in the same class as a chef. I suppose this is where I confess that a good friend of mine is a chef at Orlando's."

Duo couldn't help gawking at the other man. "You've got to be kidding me. Orlando's? That place is impossible to get into, or so I've heard."

"Then I hope you'll not be disappointed when I tell you that after you left my office I placed a call to my friend and he prepared most of tonight's meal for me. He gave me the pork chops and explicit instruction on how to cook them so that I could honestly say that I did make at least part of the meal."

"I'm not disappointed," Duo said as they entered the dining room. The iron-rod, glass table was already set and a mouth-watering aroma roused his appetite. "In fact I'm thoroughly impressed that you'd go to so much trouble for me." To prove it, he turned to his host and gave him a kiss of deep appreciation, his hands sliding into that glorious mass of unruly hair. Heero's free hand pressed against the middle of his back and pulled their bodies closer, and Duo forgot about everything but the feel, smell and taste of the man holding him. Once again it was Heero who pulled back first. "Food first," he said with a grin. "We've got to keep up our strength for later, don't we?"

"Ah... yeah." Duo could only hope that Heero would remember their conversation that afternoon, agreeing to take things slow. "Need some help?"

"Not really, but I wouldn't mind your company. Why don't you select some music and then joining me in the kitchen."

Duo looked in the direction Heero had nodded and saw a very impressive sound system, easily rivaling the one in his apartment. "Very nice," he said with honest appreciation.

"The CDs are in the case next to the receiver. Put on something to your liking."

Heero smiled again before leaving him, and as soon as he disappeared into what Duo guessed was the kitchen, the braided man made a beeline for the entertainment center. Leafing through the music, he could see that Heero liked a wide variety of music, leaning more towards jazz than anything else. He'd been exposed to different types of music in high school, having sung tenor in the symphonic and jazz choirs and listening to Aunt Helen's classical and oldies music, he'd gained an appreciation of almost every type of music.

He came across the CD of a well known pop singer who had aged more gracefully than most and remained in the music business by singing love songs from an era before he was born. He was familiar with the music only because his aunt had a fondness for tunes from that decade. Aunt Helen used to come home from work and turn on the oldies while she made dinner. She used to sing along while she worked. Looking down at the cover of the CD, he smiled at the memory of her soft voice filling the warm and aromatic kitchen. It was a good memory. Surprisingly, he had many more good memories from the time he'd lived with his aunt. He remember the first time he came to live with her after the death of his parents, the love and warmth her family gave him as well as the sense of belonging often helped to smooth over the waves of bitterness he felt from time to time over his aunt's repeated attempts to brainwash him. He was grateful to her; he loved her. One day he hoped to be able to forgive her for messing up his life.

Setting the CD in the player, he pressed play and waited until the music began before he adjusted the volume. Once he was satisfied, he turned towards the kitchen, lured in that direction by the heavenly aroma and the man making dinner, both promising a wonderful evening.

Duo entered the kitchen to find Heero standing in front of the stove wearing a standard chef's apron, the pork chops sizzling in the hot pan. He wanted to go to the handsome man and press himself against his back, wrap his arms around him and look over his shoulder while he cooked; but he held back. It was too early in the game for him to put himself out there like that, to allow himself to do something so... domestic. He refused to let his hopes get too high, too soon, or to envision what it might be like to be in relationship with someone like Heero, not when it could all be taken away. Having someone he cared about walk away from him was something that had happened too many times for him not to practice caution.

"Almost ready," Heero said with a glance over his shoulder. "Why don't you finish tearing up the lettuce." He nodded to the other side of the sink where a bowl and preparations for a salad had already been started.

Washing his hands, Duo began to tear the romaine lettuce into bite sized pieces, humming to the tune Tracks of My Tears.

"I'm surprised you like this type of music," Heero said over the sizzling sound coming from the pan on the stove. "I lean more towards rock and alternative music," Duo answered, glancing up from the lettuce to make eye contact with the other man. "My aunt played this kind of music all the time when I was in high school. It reminds me of home."

"Are you on good terms with your aunt?"

Now there was a loaded question. "Pretty much. I owe her a lot, and I do love her. She took me in and raised me as her own. She was good to me, but I can't help blaming her for some of the things she did that messed me up. She's still in denial that I'm gay."

Heero frowned. "That can be tough."

"Yeah, sometimes it is. I spoke with her on the phone recently and told her we needed to sit down and talk when I go home for Thanksgiving, try to come to an understanding. She's going to try and explain why she acted the way she did, having constantly harangued about the evils homosexuality. Hopefully, whatever she has to say to me will help heal the rift that's grown between us. She's my only family, Heero, and I don't want us to be at odds with each other."

"Then it's probably a good thing you're both willing to talk things out, and better sooner than later, before it's too late, " Heero said, turning back to the meat in the pan and flipping it over. Duo wondered at the doomsday ending of that sentence, and he noted a hint of sadness in his voice, too. The next words Heero uttered explained everything. "I found out a couple of weeks ago that my Mom has pancreatic cancer."

Duo expressed his heartfelt sympathy. From what he'd read, there was no cure for that type of cancer. When Heero continued, it was in a thoughtful mien. "She was extremely unhappy with me and hurt when I went to live with Mema in Chicago after high school. Our relationship became strained at that point and I regret not trying harder to try to close the breach that seemed to grow with every passing year. In a strange way, my trip home to see her is the reason we met."

Duo stopped what he was doing to look at the other man, surprised by that last statement. "How so?"

"I went home to the ranch after finding out about her illness with every intention of patching things up with my Mom and to see if there was anything I could do to help her in some way. It was depressing as hell, Duo," he admitted, looking sad and resigned. "She'd had several chemotherapy treatments and had already lost large clumps of her hair and so much weight that she hardly looked like herself. Her sister and brother, who live on the ranch also, as well as her current partner, are caring for her, so at least I know she's no alone in this. Regardless of how much I wanted to stay, the time came that I had to return to L.A. and my job. Though I tried to hide it, I was very upset, not knowing if I'd ever see my Mom alive again. Perry, or rather, Mr. Rhodes, was aware of what was going on with me and noticed right away how upset I was. He more or less ordered me to take another couple of days off. He'd been invited to Charise's ranch for the week but was too busy to take the time off, plus he had his trip to Ireland approaching. He called and arranged with her for me to take his place."

A small smile came to Heero's face as he continued. "I rode one of the horses every day I stayed there, venturing up into the hills for a little clarity and to... I don't know, prematurely grieve. I actually found the House on the Hill on my first day. I stopped to water my horse and discovered fairly quickly that the place was a famous whore house. It was my final day at the ranch that I'd ridden out early and stopped at the House on the Hill on my way back. Lucky for me, I was sitting on the fence, basically enjoying the scenery and fresh air when you came along."

Taking the pan off of the gas burner, Heero carefully removed the pork chops and set them on a plate. Then picking up a pint-sized Styrofoam container, he poured its contents into the hot pan. It sizzled and a fruity aroma quickly filled the kitchen. "Like I told you at lunch," Heero continued, quickly stirring the pan's contents, "from your appearance alone, thinking you were the most handsome man I'd ever seen, I thought you worked there. So, I eventually gave into my curiosity and followed you in, and that's how we met." With the last word, he cast a knowing grin at his guest while shifting his eyebrows suggestively.

Turning his attention back to the pan, he stirred the contents once more and announced it ready to be served. The microwave opened and revealed rice pilaf and carrots, and the pear sauce was poured over the pork. All that was left for Duo to do was to add the lettuce to the vegetables which were already chopped and waiting in the bowl. Dinner was now ready to be served.

During the course of the delicious meal the two men spoke of many things they hadn't touched on during their lunch date: their taste in music, restaurants, entertainment, sport, movies and generally life in L.A. While the food was delicious, it was the conversation that captivated both men. It was clear as the evening progressed that they had a lot of common interests and there was no question about whether or not they were enjoying each other's company.

Eventually the dishes were cleared and put into the dishwasher, then Heero popped two boysenberry tarts into the microwave while Duo scooped out the vanilla ice cream. Sitting in the living room, they ate their dessert and flirted with each other.

After a movie was selected and started, Duo found himself leaning into Heero's side, with the man's arm wrapped about his shoulder. He was feeling very pleased and comfortable with the situation. Not more than fifteen minutes into the movie, Heero turned to nibble on his ear, then his neck. Before long Duo found himself on his back with the other man's body pinning him down and thoroughly enjoying Heero's mouth exploring his own. They made out for most of the movie and were unaware that it had ended until the T.V. screen went blank and the sound of static filled the air. Heero reached for the remote while Duo checked his watch; it was 12:30 a.m. He motioned for Heero to get off of him and sat up when he was able. "It's late. I'd better go."

"Stay," Heero said, reaching out and clasping his hand.

Shaking his head, Duo was about to remind him that he didn't want things to go too far when Heero added, "I know I agreed to take things slow, and I won't rush you. I just thought it would be nice to hold you in my arms all night." With eyes that seemed portray sincerity, he softly confessed, "Everything about you feels right, Duo, I just don't want the evening to come to an end."

It was a tempting offer, but still... it worried him. He'd been in this situation before, had boyfriends or dates promise not to go further. More often than not they broke their word and tried for more by getting him aroused in one way or another, hoping, no doubt, that he'd be too carried away to refuse them. That's when his aunt's voice would resound in his head, telling him how wrong it was to even think about having sex with a man and that men who desired him in that way only wanted to use his body as a vessel for their lust, but not because they loved him. That was usually when things went sour. Abruptly stopping a date's attempt at seduction generally wasn't received well.

But that was then and this was now. Should he stay or go? "I don't know," he hedged, unsure of what he really wanted.

"Besides, you have to stay," Heero continued, looking more serious. "It's dangerous to be out this late at night, with that psychotic nut case on the loose."

That was the oddest excuse Duo had ever heard for him staying overnight. "Nutcase?" he chuckled, obviously not believing Heero's reason for him not to leave. "Is that some kind of expensive legal jargon?"

"All right," the lawyer grinned. "Calling a serial killer a nutcase is too tame of a description?"

Duo was now officially confused. "What are you talking about?"

Heero's expression turned to disbelief. "Where have you been that you haven't heard about it? There's a serial killer in greater L.A. He seems to have something against gays. It started last year, but the police didn't link any of the unsolved murders together until two weeks ago. The deaths of four gay men and a lesbian have been tied to the same killer. The authorities aren't revealing the details, only that the manner of death was rather gruesome and each murder has something in common."

"You're kidding me?" Duo didn't know whether or not to believe Heero. If he was making it up, he was doing a pretty good job. But if it was the truth, then he'd been damn lucky as well as stupid for not staying in tune with current events. He couldn't believe he'd been so caught up with work and his personal life that he failed to hear anything about a serial killer. " I've been so busy with work and the chaos of my life in general that I don't think I've even watched television for..., well, I can't even remember how long it's been."

From the look on Heero's face, he was being completely serious. "I'm not trying to pull one over on you, Duo, just to get you to stay. I swear it's the truth. There is a killer out there, and he's probably looking for his next victim. Please, stay." The man's blue eyes implored him to listen to reason. "Listen, you can share my bed, or if that bothers you, take the sofa."

Weighting the odds of being attacked by a serial killer against spending the night with Heero, he looked for a bit more reassurance. "I have your word that you won't try anything?" Then more firmly he added, "I'm not kidding here, Heero. I like you a lot, but I need more than one date before we can take things any further between us."

"Two," Heero said with a grin. "We've had two dates. I consider lunch this afternoon our first date and this our second."

Duo smiled back, unable to resist the man's teasing grin. "You're right. Two. Still, it's too soon."

Putting up both hands, Heero yielded, "Okay. I understand. No touching below the belt, correct?"

"That's right."

"But you're not opposed to me holding you, and perhaps more kissing, are you?" He reached out and cupped Duo's face before he added, "To be honest, I've had my fair share of daydreams about you." Taking a step closer, Heero lowered his hand to run it down Duo's arm and with a soft expression added, "I hope you don't make me wait too long. Damn," he paused and closed his eyes for a moment. "Just the thought of you beneath me makes me hard."

"What makes you think that I won't have you beneath me?" Duo answered back, blushing a bit as he talked openly about his fantasies.

Heero smiled. "I've always said, share and share alike."

"So you won't mind being on the receiving end?"

"Not every time, but over the years I've learned to enjoy both top and bottom positions."

That brought up another subject that had been plaguing Duo's mind. A bit more timidly he asked, "You've been with a lot of men, haven't you?"

Heero paused, sighed, then answered with a slight shake of his head. "I won't lie to you, Duo. Yes, I've had sex with quite a number of men, but I give you my word that I'm clean. I've never been in a long-term relationship; my schooling and job have always been too demanding to allow me that luxury. But I've always practiced safe sex and get tested every six months. I've had sex with one other person since our get together at the ranch, but in all honesty, I don't remember ever being drawn to anyone like I am to you or ever wanting anyone as much as I want you."

Heero's confession told Duo quite a bit about the lawyer and had given him more food for thought. With Heero admitting to having sex with a lot of men, he had to wonder what he had to offer, being as inexperienced as he was? Would Heero compare him to the others and find him lacking? Doubts began pouring into his head.

"You're upset," Heero observed.

"I... No. Well, maybe." Huffing with frustration and dragging his hand through the fringe of hair over his forehead he tried again. "Yes. Shit, I don't know, Heero." Duo was finding himself at a loss for words. What do you say to someone who had just confessed that he'd pretty much lived the very life his aunt had warned him about: a promiscuous, self-centered, indulgent lifestyle with no commitments, attachments or future.

"What bothers you the most? That I've slept around a lot or that I had sex with someone after being with you?"

"I think just about everything you've said bothers me," Duo shot back. "I told you I've been cautious about my relationships, so I don't have the experience you do."

"Are you concerned that I'll compare you to past lovers?"

"Won't you?"

"No, I won't."

"Is it really possible not to compare?" Duo asked, not believing it was possible.

"I don't know about anyone else, but for me I just don't compare. Some of the men I've had sex with have been more experienced than others. So I've been both tutor and student in bed, and either way I usually have a very good time."

Duo stood, becoming unduly upset. He wrapped his hands around his braid as he tried to express what he was feeling. "Don't you see, this is the kind of thing my aunt used to lecture me about. Gay men sleeping around for recreation, using someone for their own gratification and then leaving them for another when he got bored. Dammit, Heero, your past verifies everything she drilled into my head. I don't want to be just another sexual encounter to you, Heero. Another 'good time'. I can't be just that."

Moving away, Duo decided that the evening had definitely taken a turn for the worse and it would probably be best if he left. Frankly, he wished now that he'd left earlier and avoided this entire discussion. He went to the chair where he'd placed his jacket earlier in the evening and began to put it on.

"Wait a minute," Heero said from behind him. Duo shrugged on his coat and fished into his pocket for his car keys. "Duo, listen to me." Two hands grabbed his shoulders and gave him a gentle shake. Looking up, he could see by Heero's expression that the other man appeared to be just as upset as he was. "Will you listen to me?"

After taking a deep breath to steady himself, Duo nodded, though his body remained rigid in Heero's grasp. "I may not have been the most temperate of gay men, but I grew up differently than you. Mema's belief was that sex is a healthy way to express your emotions to another person. She certainly had no inhibitions about finding a new lover whenever she felt the need for a change. I think the longest relationship she had was with my mom before she set out to see what she'd been missing. I'm not saying I don't regret some of my behavior, but I'd like to believe that if I'd met you earlier I would have behaved differently."

Pausing only to take a breath and visibly calming, Heero continued. "I suppose the question now is whether or not you can accept the fact that I've been with more men than you're comfortable with. But I want you to know, Duo, that from that moment I saw you riding down the hill toward the House on the Hill, you've been a constant in my thoughts. You're intriguing, beguiling even, and I want to be with you. If it would help to say I'm sorry about my past, about all the men I've had sex with, then I would. But I can't help but feel that by doing so I would belittle those who have shared a bit of themselves with me, and I don't think that's right either."

Duo remained in Heero's grasp, listening to every word the man said and trying to come to terms with the situation. Unfortunately, his thoughts remained scattered as he struggled to weigh the challenges as well as the consequences of allowing himself to become involved with Heero, a man so unlike himself in sexual experiences. At the same time, he didn't want to let go of what might be the best thing to come into his life in a very long time. If he wanted to be honest with himself, he didn't think it was humanly possible to forget about the number of men the good looking attorney had slept with, but he couldn't deny his own fascination and attraction for Heero either.

Heero closed in and began to place soft kisses against the corner of his mouth, then sliding his lips over Duo's, he sought permission for more. For once Duo didn't over think his reaction. He brought his arms up and encircled them around the other man's waist and pulled him closer. This feels so right, he thought. So damn good and hot. He moaned, opening his mouth and giving himself up to Heero's talented mouth.

Pulling back after a couple of minutes, Heero whispered against his lips. "How can you even contemplate giving this up before we've had a chance to discover what it means? You do feel it, don't you? I'm usually more articulate than this, but when I'm around you I feel like a fumbling novice. I can't seem to say or do anything right. Yet every time we kiss or touch, I get this indescribable feeling of rightness, of a want and need that's escalating beyond anything I've ever felt before. I've had enough experience, Duo, to know for a fact that what I feel for you, even after only two dates, is unique and something to be treasured. Maybe there's a better way of saying this, but being with you makes me feel like I've won the largest lottery in history." Placing a kiss on the tip of his nose, Heero smiled and said, "Come on, give me a chance to prove to you that I can be the man you need."

Somewhere deep inside him, Duo knew that Heero was right. What they felt for each other was powerful if not confusing and a bit frightening. He couldn't deny that he wanted this man, in spite of their differences. Feelings of desire and lust warred with common sense, which urged him to be wary, to pull back and put some distance between himself and Heero. Common sense was obviously being ignored when he leaned forward and gave the lawyer his answer by pressing their lips together and invading Heero's mouth briefly before pulling back. Something about this man aroused his body and senses. Yes, without a doubt Heero Yuy was exciting, alluring and a damn temptation he knew he should resist, but Duo also knew that he was about to throw caution as well as his doubts to the wind.

"I'm not very experienced," he answered back shyly. "I'm afraid that you'll find me lacking or be disappointed."

"Never," the other man said with a gentle smile. "I've already been with you, Duo, and the memory of that day comes back every time I close my eyes. Even the briefest kisses with you makes me forget everything and everyone else. No, I don't think it's possible that I could be disappointed in you, other than if you decided to never see me again." Heero reached out and placed his hand flat on Duo's chest, and the braided man blushed in knowing that the other man could feel the rapid beating of his heart. "The advice I received from my Mom was to follow my heart, and that's what I hope you'll do, Duo. Does your heart tell you to stay and give me a chance, or to turn and walk away?"

Never in all his life had Duo believed someone would touch him like Heero was doing. It was more than physical, more than just words. He'd heard plenty of smooth, polished lines before, delivered, more or less, in an attempt to seduce him. He'd dismissed such statements for what they were, tripe. He wondered if perhaps Heero was just a good actor, or simply a gay Don Juan. But the look in his eyes and the expression of sincerity on his face as he spoke seemed honest enough. Suddenly, on the tip of his tongue were the words, _I think I'm falling in love with you_, but he stopped himself short from uttering them out loud, shocked by what he'd almost confessed. For a long, drawn-out moment he found himself speechless by that new revelation. Could he really be falling in love with Heero Yuy? Already? Was it even possible to fall in love so quickly? And if he was in love, what would Heero say about that if he knew? He'd run, that's what he'd do, said the little snarky voice in his head, causing the need to protect himself to rear up. It would be wise, he thought, to keep his newfound feelings to himself for a while.

He swallowed nervously and said, "O.K. You've got your chance. I'll stay tonight." He was about to make the request that as long as Heero was seeing him that he not see anyone else, but on second thought, he knew it was too soon to ask such a thing from someone he'd just started dating.

Heero cupped his face between his hands and looked him square in the eyes. "You can trust me, Duo. I'll prove to you that I'm as good as my word." After giving him a brief kiss, he continued. "Now, if you mean to sleep with me tonight, platonically speaking, I'm going to need to take a very cold shower first. Let me show you my bedroom and I'll get you something to sleep in, then we'll go to bed, all right?"

Duo smiled, a bit nervously, then placed his hand in Heero's and said, "All right, let's turn in." An ominous shiver tingled all along his spine as the other man led the way to his room. Thinking back to when he'd first stood at Heero's door earlier that evening, he couldn't help but think this was one hell of a first step.

TBC

Note: No baby news yet. Next update for sure. Sorry about the lack of replies to your reviews. I can't seem to find time for more than editing these chapters and catching up on a couple of recent updates by my favorite authors. I appreciate the comments and hope you continue to enjoy the story. Thanks for reading!


	12. Chapter 12

**The Pretender  
****Chapter 12**

Heero took a circuitous route to his bedroom, locking the front door and shutting the lights off. Once they entered the lawyer's bedroom, Duo wasn't surprised to find the furnishing followed the same simple lines and modern design as the rest of his apartment. He felt comfortable here. Standing at the foot of a queen-sized bed that was covered with a pale blue comforter, he watched as Heero moved to the chest of drawers and pulled from the top drawer a white T-shirt and cotton draw-string pants. He then returned to Duo's side, kissed his mouth briefly and handed him the clothing. "Why don't you change while I'm in the shower. I'll be back in five minutes. Go ahead and climb into bed when you're ready."

Duo agreed with a nod and watched as Heero moved towards the door to the left of the room and disappeared behind it. He waited until the sound of the shower could be heard before beginning to undress himself. Any other gay man would probably think him an odd duck or ridiculous, dressing for bed and having every intention of doing nothing but sleeping beside the supremely hot guy. And why was it that Heero, no doubt taking a cold shower in the other room, seemed all the more attractive and desirable because he promised to take things slow?

He felt an urgent need to hurry and change because Heero might unexpectedly open the door and see him naked if he didn't get a move on. Shaking his head and calling himself a prude, Duo reminded himself that Heero had already seen him naked.

Changing quickly, he neatly folding his clothes before placing them on the utilitarian chair set on the far side of the bed. Then pulling back the covers he practically jumped between the sheets and snatched the comforter up to cover his lower body.

Waiting for Heero to return, he thought back on how long it had been since he'd slept in another man's bed. He'd first tried it with Wufei, several weeks after they'd begun dating. That night had marked his first attempt at having sex with someone. The Chinese student, knowing he was a virgin, had taken him to his apartment after having dinner together and promised to take things slow and to stop if asked. That promise had made it easier for him to climb into Wufei's bed and into his arms. He had every intention that night of having sex with his first boyfriend, but he had learned over the years that even the best intentions can fall flat and turn sour.

A simple kiss progressed quickly into something that promised to be wonderful. Wufei had been a hell of a good kisser, which should have alerted him to the fact that the guy had a lot of experience. It wasn't long before he was ready and eager to move to the next step. He'd enjoyed being held and kissed by Wufei that night and loved the feel of the warm firm flesh under his hands. But suddenly, like a knee jerk reaction to the escalating pleasure, he'd reacted with volition and in a way that not even he could have predicted. When Wufei's hand slid beneath the waistband of his boxers and his fingers dipped between the cleft of his ass and teased his entrance, it somehow triggered a shocking, unexpected reaction. A voice sounded in his head. It was the voice of his Aunt Helen, speaking in an all too familiar lecturing manner, pronouncing that gay men only wanted sex from a partner, not permanency nor a commitment. Her voice sternly warned that Wufei would use him for sex and then toss him away like yesterday's garbage.

Shocked and appalled from hearing his aunt's castigating voice in his head, he physically pushed Wufei away, jumped out of bed and then he proceeded to chew the poor guy out. He'd never forget the look on Wufei's face that night. His almond shaped eyes had widened with disbelief and confusion, which was probably a good match to how he felt. He hadn't understood what had happened either and had a hard time explaining it to the other equally shocked man. He wound up spending the remainder of the night wrapped in a blanket on Wufei's sofa, hating himself and trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with him? The trust that he'd started to build with Wufei had gone to hell in a handbasket in less than ten seconds. Only a couple of weeks later he'd learned that his "boyfriend" had been having sex with some other guy on campus. Wufei obviously hadn't been worthy of his trust after all.

Trust. It seemed to be the big issue with him over the years. Almost every guy he'd dated had let him down in one way or another, with Trowa's betrayal being the worst. He'd trusted the man when he said he'd wait for him to get better. Could he trust Heero, or would the gorgeous lawyer let him down like the others had?

Shaking his head, he decided he'd better change that train of thought before he second guessed his decision to stay. What was taking Heero so long? Looking around the room for something to distract himself with, he noticed a flat screen TV tucked neatly into a cabinet directly in front of the bed. Another quick glance around and he located the remote on the bedside table. Picking it up, he turned the television on and waited for Heero to show up.

He really had been too busy to read the newspaper or stay up late enough to watch the ten o'clock newscast, so if there really was a serial killer, he'd been completely ignorant about that news story. A late, late night talk show was on, so he switched channels to one of several news networks. He finished watching a report on global warming and just as it ended the bathroom door opened.

The bright light of the bathroom silhouetted Heero's body in a wonderfully erotic way as the man toweled off his thick mop of hair. If his life depended on it, Duo couldn't stop his own physical reaction at the sight of the near naked man. From what he could tell in the dim light, Heero had nice, strong shoulders which tapered down his chest to a slender waist. He let his eyes lower only a fraction to assure himself that Heero was wearing boxers. Honestly, there was not one thing about the man's physique he could find fault with. Heero was simply stunning, he decided. His heart was now tripping over itself, and the stirring below the covers clearly indicated his desire for the good-looking lawyer. Damn, not only was he lusting after the other man, but he was also becoming more and more enamored of him. How in the hell was he going to be able to resist any of the lawyer's advances? Did he really want to resist Heero?

"You want to watch the news?" Heero asked, not quite suppressing the fact that he was surprised at finding the television on. He tossed the towel in his hand behind him and shut off the bathroom light before walking towards the bed. Duo was both relieved and, well, maybe just a little disappointed that the lawyer clearly favored boxes as his choice of sleeping garment. While he was glad there was another barrier between them, the loose fit of the undergarment displayed very little of what lay underneath the blue plaid print. Still, all that wonderful bronze skin and the hairless chest had his breath catching in this throat. Damn, he wanted the man.

He swallowed, recovered quickly and blurted out, "Thought I'd see if there was anything on the news about that serial killer you mentioned. With everything that's been going on at work I'm completely out of the loop about what's going on in the world."

Heero smiled knowingly while climbing into bed and sitting close to Duo's side. Despite the reported cold shower, he could feel the heat of Heero's body and leaned a bit closer, like a moth to a flame, unable to resist. "I suppose no news is good news when it comes to that story," his unwitting tormenter said. "The last victim's body was found a week ago."

Duo looked away from Heero after realizing that he had been staring. Heero's bare chest was most definitely putting a strain on his self control. He ached to reach out and touch that smooth, tantalizing warm flesh. Stifling a frustrated moan, he forced his hands to remain in place on his lap, willing them to stay put and not give into the urge to run them over that tempting bit of flesh. Shit, a quick second glace showed him Heero's dusky brown nipples which were pinched, just aching to be fondled. It took every ounce of his dwindling self discipline to turn his eyes back to the television.

Heero shifted slightly and lifted his hand up and under the thick braid and began to gently massage his neck. "You're tense," he observed, his blue eyes never straying from Duo's face.

"No kidding," Duo muttered with dry chuckle.

A small smile twitched at the corners of they lawyer's tempting mouth. "Do I make you nervous, Duo?"

"I wouldn't exactly say nervous, on edge is probably a better description."

Heero leaned closer and kissed the exposed side of the braided man's long and slender neck. "I think I like the sound of that."

Duo chuckled nervously, wondering how to cool the other man down without coming right out and telling him to knock off the sexy talk when the newscaster said something about serial killer. "Listen," he said, turning up the volume.

The middle-aged reporter was wearing a grave expression as he continued his report. "All five murders occurred near downtown Los Angeles, within a three-mile radius of each other. The police aren't revealing details about what evidence has been found at each crime scene, but in a statement issued last month the city's police commissioner reported they had linked the five murders as having been committed by the same individual. Commissioner Allison Hardwick wants to assure the public that the L.A.P.D is on top of this investigation. Regardless that here is an increase in police presence in the area, she asks the public to be aware of what is happening around them if and when they go out at night and to avoid going out alone. In a news conference, broadcasted three hours ago, Commissioner Hardwick reported the five victims appeared to have frequented trendy downtown clubs and dining establishments, particularly those catering to gays. Interviews with friends and family members indicated the victims had often visited these establishments alone. We'll bring you up-to-date information as it's released to the public."

"Damn," Duo said, shocked by the story. "That's not too far from where I work. I went out on my own to West Hollywood the other night and didn't know a thing about these murders. Guess I should consider myself lucky that nothing happened."

"Where did you go?" Heero asked, looking interested.

"To a place a... a friend of mine suggested. She's been trying to set me up with someone for a while now and gave me a couple of guest tickets to the Palomino Club."

"I've been there myself," Heero said with an appreciative glint in his eyes. "What was your impression of the place?"

Duo shrugged. "I don't know. After all I'd heard about it, it seemed a bit over rated to me, but then there weren't a lot of guys there and I'm not in the habit of frequenting gay bars. I went to them in college and they lost their appeal pretty quickly. Like I told you, I'm not into one night stands, and that seemed to be what most of the men frequenting those places were looking for."

"What are you looking for, Duo?" Heero asked, and the serious look on his face made Duo a bit nervous. He really, really liked Heero, and even though they seemed to be getting along very well he didn't know if he was ready to get into a deeper conversation about his personal feelings. Hadn't he said enough already? Hell, opening up any further would be like a walk across a mine field. He decided to try and skirt around Heero's question and maybe turn the tables. He wanted to know more about the man sitting next to him, and so he supposed a little honesty about himself was called for. Give a little, get a little, right? "I want more than just sex or a one night stand. I'm not saying you're wrong in the way you live your life, Heero, but after sleeping with as many men as you have, don't you want something more, like having someone who's there for you, having a relationship that's more than sex?" His eyes stayed fixed on Heero's face as he waited for the man to answer.

"What's the matter with sex?" Heero shot back, his grin turning devilish.

Duo shook his head. "Nothing, I suppose. Unless that's all there is."

"Sometimes sex really is all there is." The smile on the handsome man's face faltered only slightly with that statement.

An awkward moment of silence hung between the two men while the newscaster began to speak about the newest state legislation that would increase the gas tax in order to improve the highways. Duo wasn't really listening to it, he was too busy thinking about what a bad idea his staying the night had been, that he should really high-tail it back to his apartment and forget he ever met Heero Yuy. It was pretty obvious the two of them had very little in common, as far as sex was concerned, and if he pursued this relationship any further he was going to get hurt. "I think this was a bad idea," he blurted out and made a move to get out of the bed.

"No. Wait." The touch of Heero's hand on his thigh effectively held him in place. Duo turned his head and saw a change in the man's expression. Dropping the sexy, devilish grin, Heero looked much more serious when he said, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you off with my teasing. I know you were being honest with me and I was trying to.... I don't know, lessen the tension, and I failed, miserably. I can see that we might not see eye to eye on everything, but give me a chance, Duo. I don't know what it is... Well, yes, I do. I have the most insanely, powerful attraction to you. It's probably my baser nature taking the lead here, but you're like some kind of addictive drug to me. I've had you once, and from that one encounter you're all I can think about, even after you stood me up and I thought I'd never see you again. I'm probably not doing this right, but I like you, and that has nothing to do with sex. In fact, I like you a lot. And I like the fact that you're different from me, that you're cautious about who you allow into your life and bed. I think you have something to teach me. I don't know what that 'something' is yet, but I'm anxious to find out. Please say you'll stay."

Duo knew he really should go, get out of that bed and Heero's apartment and take himself home as fast as he could, but the look on the other man's face, an earnestness that bordered on pleading, was more than he could resist. He had a sinking feeling that, for better or worse, Heero was going to bring about big changes in his life.

"I've still got your promise that you'll behave?"

"Word of honor," Heero answered, the corners of his lips twitching slightly. "And to prove it, I'm ready to go to sleep. How about you?"

Turning off the television, Duo put down the remote. "Yeah, I am."

With the touch of Heero's fingertip to the base of the lamp, the room was plunged into darkness. Duo felt the other man laying down and getting settled. "Come on." There was a touch of humor in Heero's voice.

Scooting down, Duo lay on his back, feeling a bit stiff as he prepared to sleep in an unfamiliar bed and room. No sooner had his head hit the pillow, he was pulled against a warm body. He turned and settled against Heero's side, resting his head on a warm shoulder. Heero smelled good, he decided after taking in a deep breath. There was something heady about the faint scent of soap and a natural, masculine scent that was unique to Heero. He took in another deep breath and simply enjoyed the heady smell of the other man. He lay there, fairly stiff within Heero's embrace for several moments before the man came to the correct conclusion. "Am I wrong to assume that you're uncomfortable with this situation?"

"It's not you," Duo rushed to say, then wondered how he could possibly explain why he was feeling uncomfortable. A grain of truth was better than an outright lie, right? "I'm not used to sleeping with anyone else." Then realizing that comment might be taken the wrong way, he added quickly; "It's been a while since my breakup with Trowa. I haven't dated anyone since then."

"I understand," Heero replied, then yawned. "Tell me about Charise and more about how you came to work for her."

Duo chuckled, realizing Heero was just trying to get him to relax by talking about himself. It wasn't exactly a bedtime story, but what the hell. He began his tale with his graduation from college. By the time he got to the part if the story where he was plucked out of his junior associate cubicle, Heero's breathing had evened out and his responses were a muffled "huh" and an occasional, "hum". Duo felt himself relaxing as the other man drifted off to sleep. Moving slowly, hoping not to disturb him, he slipped a hand across Heero's body in order to get more comfortable. It felt good, he decided, to lay so close to someone that he could hear his heartbeat. That steady beat was like a soothing lullaby to the day-worn executive assistant, and its rhythmic pulse helped to lull him into a comfortable state of sleep.

Not a heavy sleeper, a soft moan brought Duo to full wakefulness. It took a moment for him to become reoriented, for his brain to tell him that he was in someone else's bed and that he was pretty much sprawled on top of a man, his thigh pressing up against a morning erection that certainly wasn't his own. He muttered an embarrassed apology and began to move when the arms around him tightened.

"It's all right." Ah. The voice revived his sluggish brain and told him it was the man of his most recent dreams who was speaking to him. There was a hint of amusement in the other's voice as he added, "In fact, I like this."

Duo had to admit that it was rather nice waking up to the warmth of another body pressed against his own. He could definitely get used to this. But would Heero hang around long enough for him to learn whether or not he could trust the lawyer? Well, he trusted him well enough to sleep in his bed last night, hadn't he? And hadn't Heero proved himself by not taking advantage of the situation? Just as that thought went through his head, a hand moved under the hem of his T-shirt and a smooth palm slid up the length of his back. "Um... you feel so good," Heero murmured sleepily, his lips against the top of Duo's head. Suddenly, Duo found himself flipped over and onto his back, their positions reversed. Heero was now above him with his leg now pressing against his very interested groin. Evidently morning breath didn't bother Heero, for the lawyer paused for only a moment to look down at him, then lowering his head he kissed him soundly. This was one hell of a great way to wake up, Duo thought as he threaded his fingers through the thick head of messy, dark chocolate brown hair.

Breaking suddenly for air, Heero gasped. "God, I want you."

"Too soon," Duo replied as he struggled to catch his breath and control his raging hormones.

Heero's hips thrust upward. Duo moaned as their stiff erections rubbed against each other. He reacted instinctively and met that thrust, silently telling the other man that this kind of contact was not only all right, but welcome. With lips joined, chests pressed together and their lower bodies seductively grinding against each other, Duo was tempted to give in and invite Heero to take him. He wanted Heero, so why the hell was he was putting him off? It wasn't like he hadn't had sex with the other man before, but that had been different, or so the voice of reason whispered inside his head. It was the same voice that often parroted his aunt's warnings and accusations. And right then it was telling him that if he truly wanted Heero in his life, more than a short fling, that he should wait. If the lawyer really wanted him, the voice in his head reasoned, he would take this burgeoning relationship seriously by not giving into the baser need to copulate so soon. They were intelligent men, they could figure out how to make this relationship last, if that's what Heero really wanted from him.

And like a light turning on in his head, Duo suddenly knew without a doubt _that_ was exactly what he wanted from Heero; a loving, long-term relationship. But was the other man ready for the monogamous relationship Duo would insist on?

Heero's moan was muffled slightly by their joined mouths. His hands were tangled in Duo's long hair, holding him in place as most of the lawyer's weight moved on top of his body. This definitely felt good, Duo thought. No, better than good, he amended. He'd always been drawn to strong men, though he wasn't sure why. Could it be that he liked being dominated? Or had he unconsciously sought out someone who would take the lead in their relationship? He didn't know and, frankly, at the moment he wasn't overly concerned about the answer. Heero was making him feel wonderful and sexually alive, and he was loving every moment.

Regardless of the fact that their bodies were separated by Duo's bedclothes and Heero's boxers, and that their hands hadn't strayed too far south, Duo was completely aroused by having Heero on top of him. He responded by bucking his hips up in time to Heero's thrusts. And then he was tipping over the edge, drowning in waves of pleasure even as Heero continued to move on top of him. He clutched the man's shoulders and gasped at the powerful release, his ejaculate wetting his borrowed sleeping pants. Falling back into the pillow with a gasp, he strove to catch his breath as Heero's tongue claimed mouth and his hips continued to thrust against him until he also gasped his release and moaned loudly as he rode out his own climax.

The lawyer collapsed on top of him, his head tucked beneath his chin. While still catching his breath, Heero whispered, "Look what you've reduced me to, Duo. I'm dry humping you like a horny teenager. I'm sorry, but I couldn't help myself. You're too tempting to resist completely."

Duo brought a hand up and combed it through the messy locks of deep brown hair. "It's all right," he replied. Although what they'd just done wasn't technically having sex, it was close enough that Duo felt rather triumphant. He'd proved once again that he'd overcome his phobia about sex. He must be cured. "In fact, that felt damn good."

Lips pressed against his neck, and then a tongue swirled against the pulse beneath his skin. "You taste good," Heero murmured while his lips and tongue continued to explore the sensitive area. Duo knew this man could probably seduce him over and over again, but he resolved to wait until he was sure Heero saw him as something more than a sexual conquest.

With some reluctance Duo pushed at Heero's shoulders. "Time's up," he told him with an apologetic grin.

"It's Saturday," Heero protested. "We've got all day, not to mention all weekend."

Though tempted, Duo was determined to resist. "Nope. Besides the fact that I've got a large, uncomfortable wet spot to deal with, I intend to make you breakfast."

Heero eased off his body to rest on Duo's right side, content for the moment to study the long-haired man's face. The small grin he wore showed that the man wasn't upset about his suggestion being sidelined. "All right. A shower and breakfast, and then what do you want to with the rest of the day?"

"What time is it?"

Heero looked over his shoulder to a clock on his bedside table. "Seven thirty."

"Ever play racquetball?"

The two men spent a very pleasant day together. Heero learned a new sport at the gym near Duo's work, and Duo's estimation of the other man rose after learning first hand that Heero was a quick learner, competitive and a good sport. The Asian man confessed that he was a proficient tennis player, and thought that with a few more games he might just become as good in racquetball. As an extra bonus, Duo couldn't help but notice just how good the lawyer looked in the jersey sports shorts and tank top he wore.

Exhilarated by the exercise, the two men showered at the gym, stealing glances at each other without drawing attention from the other men, and changed back into the jeans and T-shirts that Heero had once again provided from his wardrobe. With very little persuasion he convinced Duo to not only have lunch with him, but then take in a movie at a nearby cinema.

It wasn't long before Duo realized why Heero had picked a movie that had been out for more than a month and had gotten less than stellar reviews. His first hint was when the man led him to the top of the stairs and into a corner spot. With only a handful of people attending the matinee, Heero's reasoning became quite clear. "Are you planning on watching the movie at all?" Duo asked as Heero sat down and lifted the arm rest between their seats.

"Not more than a couple of minutes of it. You?"

Duo could only laugh as he sat next to the other man. He felt a tingle of pleasurable anticipation tickle its way along his spine to ignite his groin when Heero took his hand and threaded their fingers together. Duo smiled at him before taking a sip of the soda he'd bought at the concession stand in the lobby. There didn't seem to be a need for words, and Duo reasoned it was because they were both simply enjoying each other's company. The lights dimmed, the preview for coming attractions came on, and they made five minutes into the feature presentation before Heero turned in his seat and began to kiss the living daylights out of him.

Duo floated into his apartment later that night. He couldn't remember ever having had a day as perfect as the one he'd just spent with Heero Yuy. He flopped down onto his sofa and relished the feeling of contentment that enfolded him, a feeling he attributed to the Asian man. Damn, Heero was perfect. Had he finally hit the jackpot and found the man of his dreams? Heaven knows he'd suffered enough to get to this point. With a string of boyfriends and disappointments and one heart ache after another, he'd almost given up hope of having a relationship, of loving someone and having them love him back. Was it fate or dumb luck that had brought Heero into his life?

Before he could fully contemplate the answer to that question, the phone rang. Reluctantly dragging himself off the sofa, he went to the table where the phone sat and looked at the machine just as the answering machine kicked on. "This is Duo. Leave a message and I'll call you back when I get a chance."

"Duo, this is Trowa. Please call me."

"Fat chance," he answered sourly, unhappy that his euphoric state had been sullied by hearing his former boyfriend's voice. He then noticed that there were two other messages on the machine. He erased Trowa's message and played the next one.

"Duo, this is Quatre." Erased.

"Why haven't I heard from you?" Dorothy's voice demanded. "Call me or I'll show up on your doorstep in the middle of the night; and you know that's not an idle threat."

Hitting the speed dial button for the blond woman, Duo knew better than to ignore her call. "Finally," Dorothy answered after the third ring. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Busy," he answered with a chuckle.

"I hope it's the kind of busy I'd approve of."

He rolled his eyes at Dorothy's weird humor. "Pretty much. Guess who showed up in Charise's office as her new lawyer?"

There was a long pause before Dorothy answered. "There's only one person that seems the most unlikely candidate. Don't tell me it was your fantasy cowboy."

"Bingo!"

The woman actually gasped. "You're kidding me?"

"No, I'm not, and I can hardly believe it myself," Duo said as he took the phone with him back to the sofa. He sat down and brought his stockinged feet up to rest on the coffee table.

Dorothy's questioning continued. "What are the chances of that happening? You're sure it's the same guy?"

"Positive. He was a little bit upset with me at first, but I think it was more because it was a shock, seeing that we each thought the other was a prostitute, then it was for me leaving him hanging at the ranch, so to speak."

Dorothy's laughter carried over the phone line. "So tell me what happened."

He briefly described how he'd entered Charise's office and his reaction after discovering Mr. Yuy was indeed the man he'd had sex with in the hot tub of a brothel. He also told her of their agreeing to a truce, to treat each other in a business-like manner. He skipped the part about his argument and disassociation with Quatre, but mentioned that he and Trowa were having a disagreement in his office when, much to his surprise, Mr. Yuy showed up. "To make a long story short, he asked me out to lunch, and we really hit it off." He also decided not to mention how that ended with him storming out of there and later making up with Heero in his office. "He then asked me to his place for dinner and convinced me to spend the night, seeing that there's some serial killer in the city."

"If you tell me you had sex with him, I'm going to give you a Dorothy Catalonia certificate of graduation."

"Well, I slept with him. Does that count for something?"

"No sex?" She sounded shocked.

"Let's just say no penetration."

"Why not?"

"Because if I have sex with him again I want it to be for the right reasons this time. Not just to have sex."

"Duo, Duo, Duo! What is going on in that gorgeous head of yours? You've already had sex with him, what exactly are you looking for?"

Feeling somewhat put off by her cavalier attitude regarding the things he believed were important, he answered rather waspishly, "Something more than a one night stand. I'm looking for trust, a relationship with meaning and commitment?"

"After one date?!"

He had to concede that she was right to be questioning his logic. He was expecting a lot from Heero after a short acquaintance, especially considering they first met and had sex under false pretenses. That day and their unexpected meeting had brought about something he'd wanted for a long time; to conquer the voice in his head and have sex. He owed Heero his gratitude for unknowing helping him, but what he felt for the man was more than just gratitude. On the other hand, having sex with Heero, a virtual stranger at the time, had to indicate he trusted Heero on some level even then.

He knew what Dorothy thought, that he should enjoy his sexuality now that he was, hopefully, free of his phobia. But he knew it wasn't in his nature or beneficial to his long-term goals to be loose with his affections, especially in such an irresponsible way, having sex with random strangers. "He really seems to like me, Dorothy, maybe even as much as I like him. I was being truthful when I said that I'm looking for a monogamous relationship. It's what I've always wanted. After the whole thing with Trowa, I just need to be sure the person I'm involved with isn't going to leave and hurt me like he did."

Dorothy took on a more professional tone when she said, "You've got to get over that, Duo. So Trowa dumped you for another man. It happens; get over it already. Are you really going to let his actions continue to affect your life? You need to move on. Learn from the past, but don't let it cripple you."

"That's exactly what I'm doing," Duo replied, frustrated with the woman's inability to understand his reasoning. "I told you in the beginning, Dorothy, when it comes to sex and relationships, I'm not a player. I want to love and be loved, and I want someone I can trust. I can't get either of those two things on one date, or even six. It takes time, and I don't want my physical desires dictating what my emotional needs are. I gave into them once, just to prove that I could get past my aunt's influence. Now I'm searching for what I've always wanted, a faithful life companion, a lover and best friend all wrapped up in one."

Dorothy sounded amused when she said, "Sometimes your naivete really surprises me, Duo."

That stung, and feeling defensive he shot back, "And sometimes your lack of morals shocks me." He regretted his words a scant moment after they left his mouth.

After a long moment, Dorothy said in a stiff tone, "I think it's best that I hang up now. It would appear our sessions are over for the time being. If you have any further need of my services, feel free to call."

"Dorothy, wait," he shot back, but not before the dial tone sounded in his ear. She'd hung up on him. "Well, shit!" In the space of a week he'd offended both of this therapists and lost his closest friends. He was definitely on a roll.

TBC

Notes: No baby news yet, though I think Louise had her baby yesterday, as that's when they were going to induce labor. I'll let you know when I hear something. And no worries, she wanted me to assure readers that she'll only be out a short while before she's back to editing this story. What a trooper! Thanks for reading and commenting. You guys are the best!


	13. Chapter 13

**The Pretender  
Part 13**

Though he'd looked forward to sleeping in Sunday morning, Duo's internal alarm clock woke him at six a.m., the same time he woke up for work Monday through Friday. He did manage to lay in bed for a while, thinking back on the previous day and the time he'd spent with Heero. The initial excitement he'd felt about the handsome man when they first started dating had increased tenfold now that he'd gotten to know him better. Hope, that the lawyer really was the real deal, had taken root in his heart. So far Heero was proving to be as good as his word. He was extraordinarily patient with him and more honest and up front about himself than any other guy he'd dated. He could only hope the man wasn't too good to be true. He'd been down this road before, having felt attraction, longing and lust for someone only to be disappointed. Was it really possible for a gay man to find a life-long companion? Just because he was gay didn't mean he lacked the desires heterosexual men had: wanting to love and be loved, to have a friend, a home and maybe a kid or two. Whether or not Heero wanted the same things was yet to be seen. After all, those weren't the kind of topics you could bring up during the first couple of dates; doing so might scare a guy off. He just needed more time, some answers and to test the waters with Heero Yuy a bit more.

Feeling more optimistic and happier than he had in a long time, he paused to enjoy the moment before making himself get out of bed. He had laundry, dishes and grocery shopping to do for the week ahead.

While sitting in the laundry room two hours later, his cell phone rang. He hoped it wasn't Charise calling about some emergency that would force him back into the office or to her Malibu home. A smile stretched across his face as the caller was identified as Heero Yuy.

"Hi," he answered cheerfully.

"Hello, handsome," Heero replied with a smile in his voice. "I miss you. Any chance we can get together today?"

"I thought you had to look over some briefs today?" Duo asked as the spin cycle ended and the washing machine slowly came to a stop.

"There's definitely some briefs I'd love to go over."

Duo gave an amused snort. "I'll bet. I'm in the middle of doing my laundry, so I'll be tied up here for a couple of hours."

"Do I get points for not commenting on that last line?" Heero chuckled before admitting he was in the middle of doing his laundry also.

"I'll give you two points, but that's only because I like you." he chuckled. Then sobering he added, Unfortunately, I also have to buy groceries today."

"We could do that together," Heero suggested. "Then, if you'd like, maybe we could have dinner at your place."

Though it sounded like a good idea, Duo felt a sudden reluctance at letting Heero into his home, his sanctuary. The timing just didn't feel right. "Tell you what. Since we don't live close to each other, why don't we finish up our chores and then I'll treat you to a dinner out. What do you feel like? Mexican? Chinese? Italian? Name it and we'll find a place somewhere in between our apartments."

Heero's side of the line was quiet for a moment. Then he answered, "I guess that sounds more reasonable. My frozen goods would no doubt melt if I came to your place after shopping."

"That's my thinking," Duo replied. "Plus I'll never win you over with my cooking, unless you'd like me to whip you up a bowl of Cheerios."

"I wouldn't mind that for breakfast."

Duo let that not so subtle suggestion pass and they spent the next five minutes hashing over what they felt like eating and settled on Japanese, one of those corporate restaurants where they chop and cook the food at the table. Heero offered to call and make the reservation for six, but Duo asked if they could meet earlier, stating that he had to be in early. After the call ended, he couldn't tell by Heero's voice if he was disappointed by their dinner arrangement or not. No doubt the other man had wanted to see his place to get a better perspective of him: how he lived and what he surrounded himself with. Or maybe he just wanted some alone time, hoping to get a bit further than they had Friday night. Well, disappointed or not, they were having dinner together at Bennihana's, and Duo couldn't help feeling excited at seeing the handsome lawyer again.

They met outside the designated restaurant a few minutes before five. Heero was dressed in a light blue oxford shirt with the sleeves rolled up and blue jeans that were neither too tight nor loose. Duo recognized the brand immediately; they weren't from Charise's line, but one of her competitors. While he took a moment to appreciate the other man's appearance, he noticed Heero was also giving him the once-over. His smile showed approval of the black jeans and gray, v-neck silk pullover he wore, which looked as expensive as they were, being part of Charise's line for men. Thanks to Charise he'd gotten them at a ridiculously discounted price, as he did most of his clothing, otherwise his paycheck would be considerably smaller. Sometimes he felt like a mannequin for the designer, showcasing her clothing in his everyday life. Not that he was going to complain. He had a wardrobe that movie stars would be envious of.

One dark eyebrow rose on Heero's handsome face. "Charise's?"

"Of course. Perks of the job," he answered with a grin. "Hungry?"

"Hell yes," Heero answered with a suggestive wink. "I'd give anything to kiss you right now."

Duo looked around to see that there were quite a few people walking on the streets. He wasn't one for public affection, knowing that it usually drew nasty glares and scathing remarks not quite under the complainer's breath. "Maybe later, when we're not so visible." Hearing Heero's disappointed sigh, he compromised slightly by throwing his arm around the lawyer's shoulders. "Come on, let's get in there before they give our table away."

They had an enjoyable time over their dinner. The Japanese chef who cut, cooked and served their meal was impressive to watch as he worked with his sharp knives, but they were glad when he finally left them to their prepared meal and to more private conversation. They spoke of interests, finding even more things in common and of the week ahead. Duo was further encouraged by the ease of their conversation and learning that they shared a love for reading, of going to the movies and of renting old classics. Their tastes in music differed, however. Heero preferred jazz and classical while he like alternative and some classic rock, though they found a few country artists the both listened to on occasion. They talked of favorite actors, cars, magazines and politics while other restaurant patrons came in and left the restaurant. Time seemed to stand still for them as they enjoyed each other's company over dinner. It wasn't until Heero excused himself to use the men's room that Duo looked at his watch and was shocked to see it was nine thirty. He had intended to be back home by eight thirty at the latest.

He quickly settled the bill and tried to ignore the relieved look on their server's face. He felt a little guilty that they had probably cheated the guy out of several tips because of their prolonged stay, so he tipped the man generously in order to compensate whatever loss in wages they might have caused him. Heero returned and gave Duo a questioning look when he saw him standing next to the cleared table.

"I hadn't realize how late it was," he explained.

"I'll leave the tip."

Duo shook his head. "Already taken care of."

They walked out of the restaurant together, and paused at the entrance. After a short discussion, they realized they had both used the same parking lot, two blocks south. Turning in that direction, they began the short walk.

"When can I see you again?" Heero asked.

"I don't know. When are you free?" Duo figured his companion would have the more complicated schedule.

Heero paused to think a moment before answering, "I've got court tomorrow, and will probably be there all day, but I'm scheduled to meet with Charise on Tuesday at one. How would you like to grab a quick lunch with me just before then? Can you take your lunch at twelve?"

Nodding, Duo grinned. "Sounds good."

Heero followed him to his car, and gave the black, two-seat BMW roadster a nod of approval. "Nice."

Duo grinned and patted the roof of his car while looking with affection at his pride and joy. "I like sleek and fast." He turned his head only to find his face captured between two hands a scant second before his mouth was taken in a thoroughly wonderful kiss. He reciprocated with as much if not more enthusiasm. The kiss seemed to go on forever, and yet seemed to end too soon when Heero broke off to catch a full breath before he grinned and said, "I can be as sleek and fast as you want."

"I'll bet you can," Duo chuckled nervously, then leaned forward for one more kiss, aware that it was getting late and he needed to go home and call his aunt before she alerted the police that he was missing. Pulling back, he said with an apology, "I'm sorry, but I've really got to go. I'll see you Tuesday. Where do you want to meet?"

"Ritchie's?"

Duo nodded in agreement to the sandwich shop about half a block down the street from the office. "At twelve."

"I'll probably be a bit late, coming from my office. You can order for us and save some time."

"Okay," Duo agreed, unlocking his car and opening the door.

"I'll take the soup and sandwich special. Turkey with the works, minus mayonnaise, and the soup of the day."

"Got it." He sat in the driver's seat and put his key into the ignition, feeling torn between needing to leave and wanting so desperately to stay.

Heero moved around the door and crouched down in order to look him in the eyes. "I enjoyed this weekend, Duo. I hope we have many more to come."

His heart skipped happily at Heero's words. "I want that, too." After one more quick kiss Heero stood, shut the car door and turned to find his own vehicle. Duo watched him for a moment, admiring the view of other man's backside, visible by the light of the moon and his car's headlights. With a sigh of both longing and regret, he put his car into reverse and began the drive back to his apartment.

They met twice that week for lunch and on Friday night Heero went as his date to a fellow staff member's party at their house in Newport Beach. For the first time Heero was allowed to see him interact with the people from his workplace, and the man seemed impressed that he knew everyone by name and spoke to them each in a way that denoted knowledge of their personal lives. With a flash of regret in his eyes, Heero admitted he couldn't say the same thing about his office, where their cases came first and socializing was limited to brief celebrations after a large case had been won. Though he was surrounded by law clerks, fellow lawyers and a secretarial staff, Heero admitted he often felt isolated in comparison to the friendliness of Duo's fellow workers. After a round of introductions had been made, Heero relaxed and conversed easily with Charise's employees. He even braved holding Duo's hand as they sat on a sofa and chatted with a woman from the design staff.

The next week followed a similar routine, grabbing a lunch together twice, and then going to a movie on Friday night. They made out in Duo's car in front of Heero's apartment building until 2 a.m., and Heero couldn't quite hide his disappointment when his invitation to stay the night was declined. Even though Duo knew he was falling hard and fast for the handsome lawyer, his sense of self-preservation kept throwing up roadblocks, warning him that Heero definitely had the potential to hurt him as badly as Trowa had. To make up for disappointing him, he offered Heero something else, something to look forward to.

"Please try to understand, I really can't stay. Not tonight. But I'll tell you what. Why don't you pick the night next weekend, and we'll hit the town, go to a club or something, and then we'll come back here and I... I'll stay the night."

Heero studied his face, barely visible in the dim light that came from his apartment building. "The whole night?"

"You bet." Duo tried to sound as if it was no big deal, that his heart wasn't about to pound its way out of his chest while the voice of his aunt was in his head whispering that this tempting man in front of him was going to use him and then cast him aside.

"Why next weekend and not tonight?" Heero was certainly persistent, but the tone he used and the playful touch along his jaw line was teasing and tempting.

Duo shrugged, not sure what to say. Telling Heero that he had to work himself up to having sex with him again didn't sound very flattering, neither did the confession that it would be only his second time ever having sex and that he was nervous as hell about not looking like the novice he was. He finally answered him with the most logical explanation he could come up with. "The anticipation will make next weekend all the better, don't you think? Besides," he continued with a look of apology, "it's been a long week, it's very late and I'm bone tired."

"Can I see you tomorrow?"

"I've got a ton of things to do, Heero. I could possibly meet you for a game of racquetball on Sunday morning."

Heero frowned and shook his head. "I've got plans then. Maybe we could try another early dinner Sunday night? I can come to your place and whip up something simple. Omlets or some pasta."

Again, Duo felt those damn defensives building up again. He didn't know why he felt so hesitant about having Heero in his home. He could only rationalize that his apartment represented a place of safety, his last defense against being irrevocably hurt if something went wrong. The memory of Trowa saying goodbye to him while standing in his living room was a memory that still haunted him. "I'm not sure that will work either. Can I get back to you?"

Heero gave a disappointed huff, obviously unhappy with his answer. "Sure. Just give me a call and we'll work out a time and place."

The awkwardness of their parting stayed with Duo as he drove off. He hated risking his chance with Heero, but the fear of performing badly in bed outweighed the risks. He needed to speak with Dorothy, make up with her and work himself up to being intimate with the gorgeous lawyer again. Why did his life have to be so complicated?

As much as he wanted to see Heero again that weekend, Duo begged off from getting together on Saturday night, fearful that Heero would again ask him to stay the night. He knew that if he did, they wouldn't be sitting up all night, sipping wine and simply talking. No, they both carried the memory of having hot, unrestrained sex in the garden hot tub at the house of ill repute. Damn, that spontaneous, courageous persona he'd conjured up that afternoon had not only helped him overcome what had, up until that time, been an insurmountable hurdle, but it had also, unexpectedly, led to him dating the man who had unknowingly taken his virginity.

Again, he wondered what the odds were that he and Heero would run into each other after their first encounter at the House on the Hill, much less meeting up in his work place and begin dating. The entire affair had a surreal feeling to it. So why was the thought of spending the night at Heero's place next weekend as terrifying as it was exciting? He couldn't deny the fact that he wanted Heero, now more than ever. He wanted a normal, healthy and growing relationship with the handsome lawyer. Each date they'd had over the past two weeks had him feeling more and more confident that Heero was the man for him. Having sex with him was inevitable and desirable, especially now that their relationship looked like it was about to take the next step. And really, Heero had been more than patient with him. What the man thought of him after putting him off like he had, he had no idea. But his admiration for the dark haired man had grown as the two of them had grown closer and he was determined to make Heero's wait worthwhile when they finally went to bed together... probably during the coming weekend.

On Monday morning, precisely at one minute after nine, Duo placed an urgent call to Dorothy and, after apologizing for saying anything that might have offended her, scheduled an appointment for that afternoon. He didn't have a moment to waste if he was going to be ready to have sex on Friday night.

Entering his apartment that night, book in hand, Duo toed off his dress shoes, removed his suit coat and loosened his tie. It was good to be home again and out of the mad rush that had been Charise's office that afternoon and after his appointment with Dorothy. It had been the kind of day where anything that could go wrong did. He'd worked himself ragged all day trying to make the designer happy. She seemed to find fault with the workmanship of several dresses and the material wasn't what she'd envisioned. The design and materials departments were upset and the phones kept ringing off the hook. Heero had called in the middle of the chaos and he'd had to turn him down for lunch because Charise needed him to stay close at hand.

He'd left the office an hour later than usual and entered Dorothy's office five minutes late. Her outer office was empty, as usual. Most of the people she worked with wanted to keep their apparent sexual problems to themselves and not be forced to sit in a room full of other dysfunctional and curious people, eager or reluctant to reveal their problems to a total stranger. Dorothy eliminated such an uncomfortable scenario by spacing her clients a good half hour apart. He'd never seen another man or woman in her outer office when he arriving or leaving.

With her long white hair pulled back into a ponytail and held by a simple black ribbon, Dorothy was leaning against the doorframe of her office as he entered the room. "You're late," she said with a frown and a disapproving tone of voice.

"Sorry, I got stuck on the freeway," he replied with a frustrated huff. Of course, that was the usual excuse for anyone living in L.A.

Dorothy turned without a word further and entered her inner sanctum. With the blinds half closed on the one large window in her office, dimming the effects of the setting sun, she motioned him to sit in the chair identical to the one she always took. She sat and patiently waited for him to take off his jacket and get settled.

"Now, tell me what's going on," she instructed as she crossed one long, pale and trim leg over the other, her pale blue, knee-length skirt sliding halfway up her thigh as a result.

"Heero wants me to spend the night at his place this weekend. I think I need to mentally gear myself up for having sex with him."

"I see." Dorothy's eyes studied his face with an intensity that made him uneasy. "Why is this such a problem, Duo? You've had sex with Mr. Yuy before."

Duo shook his head. "That was different. I was in a strange place and doing what you suggested by making up a scene in my head and following it through. I don't know that I can conjure up anything like that again."

"Is Mr. Yuy attractive?"

He couldn't help but smile. "He's a walking wet dream."

"Nice body?"

"Absolutely drool worthy."

"Bald?"

"No! He's got a ton of wild, untamable hair."

Dorothy sighed. "Pity. I have a thing for shaved heads."

"Then it's a good thing Heero is never going bald," Duo said with a frown. He didn't want Dorothy getting any ideas about his boyfriend. "Besides, if you try pulling a Quatre on me I'm going to go postal. If you don't believe me, ask him what that's like."

The woman smiled knowingly at him. "So, you're staking a claim on Mr. Yuy?"

There was a long pause before Duo replied, "Well, maybe not yet, but I'm hopeful that things are moving in the right direction."

The blond smiled at her patient. "Listen to you, Duo. You've really changed. You're no longer the guy who is afraid of giving into what you truly want. You no longer seem to define yourself simply as the man who was jilted by his former boyfriend. You're now a man looking forward to a new life with a new man. I'm so proud of you."

Duo shook his head in denial. "I'm still the jilted man, but I'm ready and determined to move on, thanks to you."

Dorothy's smile was nothing short of dazzling as she said, "That's what I like to hear. Now, about this weekend. How do you feel about getting physical with Mr. Good Looking?"

"Excited. Scared."

"First times are always a bit intimidating."

"It's not my first time."

"And do you think that Heero is in this for more than a good time? That he won't move on to someone else after he's taken you to bed?"

Duo frowned. That was the something else he'd been worried about. "Heero told me about his past, that he's slept with a lot of guys. I've explained to him that I want a long-term relationship, but he hasn't exactly told me that he wants the same thing."

"Perhaps he's just being as cautious as you are. Not of having sex, of course, but of having a relationship that's more than physical, of committing himself to a partner. Are you willing to live with that, if he can't offer you more than a couple of weeks or months of great sex?"

Duo sighed. "I don't know. But I won't have the chance to convince him we could be something more, something better than just a romp in the sheets, if I don't take the next step. He wants me, Dorothy, and in all honesty, I want him, too. I'm pretty sure I've fallen in love with him and I think he's feeling something similar for me as well."

"Then you're certain that you want to have sex with him this weekend? It's still only been a couple of weeks since you've been seeing each other, no one would think it odd if you wanted to wait a bit longer."

Duo's chin came up, and with a look of determination on his face he answered, "No, this is what I want. Now, how do you propose I prepare myself for Friday night?"

Dorothy gave him a reassuring smile, then with a gleam in her eyes she asked, "What was the name of that character you dreamed up for your fantasy? It was a western one, if I'm not mistaken."

"Laredo." He couldn't even say the name without blushing. That had been one hot fantasy.

"Do you think you can use that again? Maybe even modernize it a bit. You could be Laredo from San Francisco, and Heero the traveling salesman."

"From Japan," Duo supplied.

"You could be a..."

"Couldn't I be an assistant to one of the best fashion designers in the country, meeting the hottest lawyer for dinner and seeing where it goes from there?"

Dorothy paused to consider Duo's suggestion. "Are you ready for reality?"

"I want to be me making love with Heero, not a pretend character. I need for this to be real so that I don't have to keep coming up with farfetched daydreams just to be intimate."

"Yes, that's the goal, Duo. But just in case you panic, and I'm sure you don't want that to happen again, I think it would be wise to have something prepared."

Duo clearly recalled the last time he'd panicked. It was several weeks before Trowa's announcement that he'd fallen in love with Quatre. He and Trowa had made out on his sofa for at least an hour. Trowa was being purposely slow and cautious with his movements, telling him before he tried anything below the belt. They'd both seen it as a good sign when they managed to get their clothing off without any trouble. But as Trowa rolled him onto his back, their erections rubbing together moments before his boyfriend repositioned his legs and began to push a lubed finger into him, he'd heard that grating voice in his head telling him this was morally wrong, an act against God and nature and that he'd be committing not only sodomy but fornication as well, sins that would put him in hell for all eternity. He'd begun to hyperventilate and violently pushed Trowa away with enough force to knock the both of them off the sofa entirely and managing to hit the side of his head on the edge of the coffee table, cutting it open. The trip to the emergency room and eleven stitches on the back of his head took six hours, and that disastrous attempt at intimacy proved to be the last time Trowa suggested they try having sex again.

"No. I don't want to panic," he told the blonde woman. "I think a modern version of Laredo just might work."

There was a long pause and Duo could see that Dorothy was contemplating something else. When she spoke, her voice was soft and compelling, her expression unreadable. "You could tell Heero about your problem. He might be willing to wait until you're ready for further intimacy instead of rushing things." Dorothy's gaze never left Duo's face as she spoke. She was obviously waiting for his reaction to her suggestion.

"No," he replied, determination set on his face. "I don't want to wait any longer. I want Heero and I honestly do want to make love with him. I might lose him if I ask him to wait any longer."

Dorothy cocked her head to the side and questioned, "Is it lust that's motivating him to have sex with you, or just the fear of losing him? If he cares enough about you, don't you think he would be willing to wait?"

After taking a moment to think about it, Duo answered, "I don't know how Heero really feels about me, other than he's attracted to me. I know he likes me, and I hope he'll eventually fall in love with me, but I think it's a bit too soon to make that call. All I really know is that I really, really like Heero and I could be in love with him. He seems like one of the rare good guys everyone is looking for. He's hot, considerate, employed and appears to want me as much as I want him. Those are good enough reasons to want to sleep with him, aren't they?"

Dorothy smiled at him. "People sometimes have sex with someone for lesser reasons than that. I'm not going to tell you whether you should have sex with Heero or not. I've come to understand that honesty between two people is essential for a good relationship. And believe me, Duo, I do want you to be happy. Tell him."

Frowning, Duo considered her suggestion before replying, "I'll think about it, all right?"

An approving smile appeared on the blond's face, showing him she was pleased with even that much.

Duo found himself satisfied with their conversation, and not a little guilty about how he'd misjudged her. "You know, I really am sorry for what I said the last time we spoke on the phone. I didn't think you would value my opinion about relationships. I misjudged you and I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted," she replied with a soft smile. "I know why you felt that way, and I promise, as your therapist, I'll curb what I say about my own sex life in the future. You're entitled to your opinions and lifestyle just as I am entitled to mine. Even if we don't agree, I respect your feelings and values."

"Thanks, Dorothy." He was feeling much better about her as his therapist. This had definitely been a good session.

They walked to the office door and in parting the blond said, "Good luck, Duo, and don't hesitate to call should you need me. Which you won't," she quickly added with a reassuring grin. "Now, get out of here and land that dream man of yours before someone else does."

Duo had every intention of following the woman's advice.

TBC

Author notes: I'm going cross-eyed trying to read this over, so I'm just going to post and hope I didn't make any more errors trying to tweak this chapter. Great news. Louise/Swordy had her baby. She was induced on Thursday and had her baby on Saturday, emergency C-section. The reason why the baby wouldn't come naturally... he weighted 10 pounds 6 oz. Wow! I'm sure everyone joins me in wishing mom and baby well. Congratulations, my friend! A gift is on its way.


	14. Chapter 14

**The Pretender  
Part 14**

Friday came much too soon. Excited and nervous would adequately describe Duo's mood as he left the office at the end of the day. This was it; tonight he was going to have sex with Heero again.

His handsome date had arranged to meet him out in front of his office building at six p.m. And there he was, pulling up to the curb no more than thirty seconds after Duo had exited the building. The braided man took a moment to admire both the champagne Lexus convertible and the man behind the wheel, who was just as impressive dressed in a deep blue suit, pale blue shirt and a classic red tie. Duo thought himself appropriately dressed in black dress pants, a pale violet shirt and one of Charise's chicken scratch ties that complimented both colors. They were dressed a bit formal for going out to dinner, he thought, and said so to Heero after complimenting the other man on his appearance.

"I made dinner reservations and then thought we could visit a club where our mode of dress is required," Heero replied. With a gleam in his eyes he added, "I think it's time we go dancing, don't you?"

Duo swallowed hard. "Dancing? Where?" Images of negative reactions, of dirty looks, snide remarks all passed before his eyes. His aunt's words came back to him, that men openly shoving their deviant behavior into the public's eye deserved whatever happened to them for going against nature.

"Duo, are you all right?"

Blinking, the braided man realized he'd been staring off into space. He pushed the negative images from his mind. They were definitely not what he needed to start this night out with Heero. "Sorry," he rushed to apologize. "I... I'm not sure I'm comfortable dancing in front of people who might take exception to two guys together on a dance floor."

"Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?" Heero asked with a frown.

"No!" Duo knew he was making a mess of things. Putting his hand on Heero's forearm, he said with all earnestness, "It's not you, Heero. Never you. But you see, my aunt used to say that gays should be more considerate of others by being circumspect about their relationship in public, that being overtly homosexual was, well, I'll spare you her thoughts on the subject. I... I know she was just trying to scare me from "turning gay," but he prejudice has had some long-reaching effects on me. I'm just very cautious about public displays of affection or appearing openly gay."

Heero's frown deepened for a moment, then eased into a look of understanding. "I promise to take you somewhere safe, where no one will mind if we dance together. Can you trust me on this?" The sincerity on Heero's face was too much for Duo to say no. He wanted to trust Heero, in fact, he was pretty sure he did.

"Yes, I trust you." Heero reached out and grasped his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze before letting go. The restrained act of affection, while parked in front of his office, was appreciated by Duo and he chalked up another point to Heero.

The restaurant they dined in was a well-known eatery. Heero had made the reservation for six-forty five, and, lucky for them, they only had to wait a few minutes until they were escorted to their table. The tables in the restaurant were spaced nicely, giving diners some measure of privacy for conversation. The small floral arrangements and low lighting, aided by several small lit candles on each table, added an air of romance to the room. Duo felt himself relaxing with each passing moment, thoroughly enjoying being with Heero.

During the two hours they spent dining, they talked easily of their week, of politics, movies and music all the while engaged in flirting back and forth. They finally exited the restaurant and walked out into the balmy L.A. evening just as the last rays of sunlight gave way to the approaching night. Instead of returning to Heero's car immediately, they spent another hour peering into store windows and discussing whatever piqued their interest.

By the time they returned to where they'd parked Heero's car, Duo knew he didn't want to be with anyone but the man at his side. The only question now was whether or not Heero felt the same.

The convertible's top was up, from when they'd first parked in the garage, which Duo was grateful for once he sat in the passenger seat. For as he watched Heero settle behind the wheel, putting the key in the ignition, he had the sudden urge to kiss the man. Placing his hand on top of Heero's to stop him from turning the key, he waited until those questioning blue eyes turned to him. Leaning to his left, he reached out and placed his hand on Heero's cheek, gently guiding the handsome man forward until their lips touched.

It started out as a sweet, gentle kiss, an expression of gratitude on Duo's part. But his need for Heero was suddenly so great that he couldn't help himself from deepening the kiss, using his tongue to request entrance past those luscious lips. They parted immediately and Duo pressed his advantage, kissing Heero as passionately as he knew how. Before long, the urge to climb over the console was becoming too much of a temptation, so with great reluctance he pulled back, leaving a last, brief kiss on Heero's cheek.

Now able to see Heero's face, he was pleased to see the lawyer slightly flushed and smiling. "Wow!" Heero said with a touch of awe. "Maybe we should skip the dancing and go straight to my apartment."

"The night's still young," Duo said, hoping to forestall going to Heero's apartment just a little bit longer, at least until he had a better grip on his nerves. It was absolutely ridiculous, he thought, that as much as he wanted this, and after a week of gearing up for a night in bed with Heero, he was still feeling hesitant and somewhat jittery. "Besides, you promised to dance with me."

"I did, didn't I? All right, let's go dancing, but only for a little while. I don't want either of us to be too tired to stay awake when we get back to my place."

"I doubt there's any chance of that happening," Duo replied, his hands fumbling for his seatbelt.

Fifteen minutes later he realized where they were going, and his earlier case of nerves had morphed into trepidation. Unless he was mistaken, they were headed for the Palomino Club, where he'd had the disastrous visit only weeks before.

"What's the matter?"

Damn, Heero must have caught a glimpse of him tensing and guessed there was something wrong. It was too late to give the excuse that he didn't feel well and wanted to go home, especially when he'd been fine all evening. Besides, he was bound and determined to go through with his plan to go to bed with Heero later that night. It's what he really wanted, and so he'd just have to suck it up and hope for the best when he entered the club, and pray to God that Wufei wasn't there. "Nothing. I'm fine. Just a bit nervous about later, I guess."

Heero's hand on his face gently turned his head until their eyes met. "There's nothing to be nervous about, Duo. I care about you. I would never do anything to hurt you, I swear."

"I know. It's just that I've built tonight up in my mind so much that I'm afraid I'm going to blow it somehow."

Heero chuckled and leaned forward to seal their lips together. The kiss was slow and non evasive, and when he pulled back Heero embraced him, though it was rather awkward because of their positions in the car, "We'll just do what comes natural, Duo. I'll give you a massage when we get to my place, that should help you relax, and then you'll direct whatever happens after that, all right?"

Duo wondered if there was ever a man as wonderful as Heero. He seemed to understand him even though there was no way in hell he could know what was really going on in his mind. Heero was definitely a keeper, and Duo couldn't have felt any more fortunate than he did in that moment. "You're too good to be true, Heero," he said softly, wishing with everything in his heart that his relationship with this man would turn out to be all that either one of them needed. Yet he needed to proceed cautiously. Believing that he had already fallen in love with Heero, he knew that there was a great potential for his heart to be broken once again.

"I feel the same about you," Heero replied, and Duo didn't know if it was those words or the smile Heero was giving him that made his body feel like it was melting, not to mention his heart.

"Come on, the sooner we hit the dance floor the quicker we'll be out of there."

It wasn't unusual in this part of town, mostly known for its catering to gay clientele, to see men walking arm in arm or even hand in hand along the streets of West Hollywood. So when Heero reached for his hand, Duo didn't shy away. He clasped the offered hand just as firmly as they approached the popular gay club. Though he'd only been to the Palomino once before, it had not been his most successful attempt at socializing with gay men in public. He tensed as a feeling of dread nearly overcame him as a result of that memory. He looked skyward and silently pleaded, _Please, don't let Wufei be here tonight_.

Heero was greeted by the doorman, they were allowed entrance into the club without the man even asking for his membership card, making Duo wonder how frequently his date came to the gay club. They quickly made their way into the bar where they stopped to enjoy a drink together. Finished with their drinks, they went to the door that led to the small corridor and the dance floor.

Loud and fast music greeted the two men as they entered the strobe-lit room hand in hand. Duo was pleased to see that the dance hall was filled to capacity with a swarm of bodies moving to the thumping rhythm of the bass guitar and drums. He liked the feeling of melting into a crowd,of being anonymous and part of a mass of energy that was contagious.

A fast song had been selected by the DJ, and with a nod to Heero's inquiring look, they headed to the dance floor. Facing each other, he and Heero began to dance with their hands maintaining contact the entire time. Before long, Duo went easily into Heero's arms and pressed their bodies together. Dancing cheek to cheek, he breathed in the scent of Heero and thought he'd never known a sweeter smell. Everything about the other man intoxicated his senses: the feel of him in his arms, the way he felt so safe and cared for, the way his body moved against his own, not to mention how the man kissed. Adding to that the kindness and sharp mind Heero displayed made up all the reasons he had fallen in love with him. He couldn't seem to get enough of the man, nor get as close to him as he craved.

Tonight everything was going to change. He turned his face to place a warm kiss on Heero's cheek as they continued to move their hips in time with the beat of the music. Tonight he'd make love with Heero, but this time it wouldn't be a one-time fling, but hopefully the beginning of a wonderful love affair.

With more than a little reluctance, the two men parted as the song ended and without a pause the next one began. Heero asked if he wanted to dance to this one also, but a nagging necessity forced him to excuse himself to the restroom to relieve the pressure in his bladder from the drinks he'd consumed that evening. Heero said he'd for him at the bar.

Exiting the bathroom not five minutes later, he looked around the room for his boyfriend, a term he hoped wasn't too presumptuous in referring to Heero. As he neared the bar his steps faltered. He found Heero all right, but it was the person standing next to him that caused him to stop dead in his tracks. He was with the last man on earth he wanted to see tonight. He immediately recognized Wufei by both his build and the black hair pulled back into a short, sad excuse for a ponytail. Shit! What was Wufei saying to Heero? He could only imagine from his last disastrous encounter with his former boyfriend how the Chinese man might react when he learned who Heero's date was. Would he tell Heero he was a cock tease, a frigid bitch, and a complete failure at relationships?

To his horror he watched Wufei's hand settle on Heero's shoulder, then slowly slide down his back and come to a stop upon reaching his soon-to-be lover's perfect tush. Even from where he stood, twenty feet away and in dim lighting, he could see Wufei caress one rounded, cloth-covered swell and then gave it a squeeze that hinted of familiarity. Heero had said he'd been with a lot of guys, but only one since their first encounter in the hot tub. Had he and Wufei been lovers?

He was gripped suddenly by an overwhelming feeling of panic, his breathing and beating of his heart had accelerated, causing him to feel lightheaded. He just couldn't deal with this at the moment. God, why was it so hard to breath? And suddenly all common sense fled him. Acting on impulse and the need for fresh air, he turned and bolted off the dark dance floor, through the dim lit hallway into the front bar and proceeded directly to the main door.

Once outside the club he paused for only a moment to take in a deep breath of air and decide whether to turn left or right. For no apparent reason he turned left and ran several blocks, seeing nothing or no one in his frantic effort to escape. As his steps slowed, he calmed slightly at realizing he'd put some distance between himself and the club. He finally slowed to a stop when he came upon a bus stop.

Staring mindlessly at the metal bench provided by the city for waiting passengers, he slowly calmed. He could breathe easier now, and with each breath his sense of reason began to return and his scattered thoughts coalesced to a more rational train of thought.

What an idiot, he thought, slapping his forehead. Realizing a bit late how foolish he'd been, running away like he had. Dammit, he was a grown man, and grown men don't run away from their problems; they face them head on. Not only was he feeling regret for his rash actions, he was also extremely embarrassed. Shit, what the hell had he been thinking? How could he go back and face Heero now after running away like he had?

He could just imagine Wufei's reaction he returned to the club shamefaced. The man would no doubt don that scornful, holier-than-thou expression he'd perfected years ago. He'd always hated that pompous expression.

Duo figured he had two options: wait at the bus stop and take the first available one and head towards home, or return to the club, make an excuse, apologize and go home with Heero; that is if Heero still wanted him. When he thought about it, there really was only one option, and that was to return to the club and face the music, so to speak.

He'd no sooner made that decision and turned to retrace his steps back to the Palomino, when he caught a blur of movement in front of his eyes. A scant second later an arm tightened around his neck. Before he could utter a sound of protest or react, he was roughly jerked backwards, nearly off his feet, and a blinding wave of pain shot through his body. Suddenly, he was drowning in agony, incapable of standing or thinking about anything but the pain engulfing him. It felt like he'd been hit by a sledgehammer, the pain was more intense than anything he'd ever experienced before. It was overwhelming. Through the pain he was vaguely aware of his body convulsing, and that was equally terrifying. Unable to stop or defend himself against his attacker, he was dragged off the street and into a dark walkway. Adding to his fear and terror, he threw up the contents of his stomach and lost control of his bladder.

He felt like he was dying.

Somehow, he knew that he had been set down on his back, laying on something cold and hard. He gasped for air as he inwardly sobbed from the pain and agony being inflicted on his body as well as fear over what was happening. Any sound he might have made was nearly completely muffled when something was placed firmly over his mouth, covering the lower half of his face. Then another horrific jolt of pain shot through his left leg, followed immediately by one to his right thigh, making both of his useless and throbbing. The same was done to his arms, leaving him helpless to even raise a hand. There was nothing he could do but endure the pain and wonder who would do this to him.

A narrow, bright light lit up the darkness, nearly blinding him as it was turned to shine into his face. In his paralyzed state he was robbed of the ability to turn away in order to protect his eyes from the harsh brightness. Beyond the light, he could just barely make out the shape of the head and shoulders of his attacker, and in spite of his terror and pain, he caught the scent of a citrus cologne.

The dark shape then uttered its first word, identifying his attacker as male who, by the tone of his voice, was very unhappy. "Fuck!" A large, clammy hand gripped his jaw tightly and turned his face to the left, then right and back again. His tormentor seemed to be examining his face. Though he desperately wanted to pull away from the man's grasp, he couldn't. In fact, he couldn't do anything at all.

Then the grip on his face eased, yet instead of feeling relieved, Duo's fear intensified when the hand moved slowly downward down his neck to his shoulders. The light shifted from his face a moment before two hands moved to the collar of his shirt. In one unexpected move, the front of his shirt was ripped opened, the buttons flying off made a small sound as they hit the ground. The hands then pulled up his T-shirt and began caressing his chest. Despite his body feeling like his nerves had been shattered, Duo felt a hand move lower until it paused over his crotch. It examine, stroked and squeezed his limp member, covered by his now soggy trousers. If his attacker thought he'd get any kind of reaction from his efforts, he was going to be monumentally disappointed.

Duo tried to yell, to protest, but his strangled cry was muffled by whatever it was that covered his mouth. Tears of pain, fear and frustration leaked out of his eyes as the man continued to molest him.

And then suddenly his violator's touch was gone and Duo, terrified over what might happen next, strained to see or hear what his attacker was up to, fearing the worst. He could hear nothing but a faint sound of footsteps running away. With a strangled sob of relief, he realized from the continuing silence that the man was gone and he had been left alone and helpless in that dark place. With the restraint covering his mouth and his body twitching uncontrollably and basically useless, he was helpless to call for help. The only sound he could manage was his muffled crying as fear, pain and terror took over.

He had no idea how long he lay there in pain and filled with fear when the sound of a cautious voice in the distance caught his attention. His fear escalated to near panic once again. Was his attacker coming back? Then sounding closer, an urgent voice calling of his name assured him he was no longer alone and that help had arrived.

"Duo! Oh God! What the hell happened to you?"

It was Heero. Heero had somehow found him. Relief flowed through him like a tsunami. If he wasn't sure he loved the man before, he knew it with a certainty now. He was gathered up in the lawyer's arms and his limp, twitching body was held against the warm chest. Heero was saying something to him. No, he was talking to someone else, someone behind him.

"Don't touch anything," an unfamiliar voice ordered from somewhere in the distance. "You might destroy evidence."

Heero bent his head to whisper reassuring words into his ear, giving comfort by his mere presence. Duo's only response was to break down, completely overwhelmed with relief that this nightmare was nearing an end.

Voices, lights and growing commotion grew around him. Then suddenly Heero's warmth and arms were gone, and though he desperately wanted to protest the separation, he was unable to do a damn thing about it. God, he desperately wanted to rip off the thing that was covering his mouth. His mind began to clear like a fog being burned away by the morning's sun, and the numbness and pain that had taken over his body began receding by small increments. The involuntary twitching of his limbs was still present but less than it had been, and as it decreased it was being replaced by a bone deep chill. It was then that his sense of smell kicked in and so did his humiliation as he smelled vomit, urine and the stink of fear on himself.

Someone seemed to be speaking to him, but he was too disoriented and distraught to make out the words. After a moment he realized the man was informing him they were going to transport him to the hospital.

He was gently lifted onto a stretcher and quickly wheeled from the dark alley he'd been dragged to a short while ago to the street, where an ambulance was waiting. Without a pause he was loaded into the back of the emergency vehicle. Immediately, two men, one in a blue uniform and another in a blue shirt and gray tweed sports jacket, followed him in and sat beside him as the back doors were closed. A moment later he felt movement and the siren began to wail.

Oh God, oh God, he chanted over and over in his head, the beginning of a prayer that he couldn't quite articulate. Where was Heero? Why wasn't he with him? Was he disgusted with him now? Between whatever Wufei's derogatory comments had been, his running away and the physical assault, Heero would probably never want to see him again. But heaven help him, he wanted Heero at that moment, more than he'd ever wanted anyone. He felt safe with the lawyer, something he was not feeling with the two strangers sitting in the ambulance with him, despite the fact that they were doing their best to calm him down.

A sudden movement resulted a burning sting across his face. Duo gasped and realized that his mouth was free once again. He gasped again, desperately trying to take in a large breath of fresh air, but for some reason his lungs didn't seem capable of drawing in enough air, which panicked him further.

"Mr. Maxwell, Duo, please calm down. You're safe now." Duo thought it was the man in the blue uniform, an probably an EMT, who was talking to him, but it was hard to tell from the tears blurring his vision. "Breath in slowly. You're breathing too fast I'm going to give you some oxygen to help, all right?" A mask was placed over his face and even before it was secured around the back of his head, he was breathing in the steady flow of sweet, life-sustaining oxygen.

Another voice, one lower than the first man, came from Mr. Tweed Jacket. "Do you remember what happened, Mr. Maxwell? Did you see the person who attacked you?" Duo wondered if the man really expected him to answer when all he could do at the moment tremble, gasp for air and fight the urge to cry.

"It's too soon," the first man stated. "From what I can see he's been hit with a type of stun implement in at least four locations. His muscles are not damaged, but exhausted. Speaking and voluntary movement at the moment will be very difficult, so your questions will have to wait."

The ride to the hospital seemed endless after than, and despite what he'd just been through and the fear and pain that still had a grip on him, Duo's thoughts returned time and again to Heero, wondering if what had happened had ruined his chances with the man.

The ambulance's arrival at the hospital and his being rushed into an exam room was pretty much a blur. Feeling exhausted, Duo's nerves felt frayed and he was shaking uncontrollably, probably a reaction to everything that had happened that night. His mouth ached from where the silver duct tape had been pulled off and he could hardly follow what was going on other than his clothing had been removed and he was being turned, examined and prodded. He felt a needle going into his arm, and wondered from the sensation if he was getting better.

He'd been unable, or perhaps unwilling, to speak for a while, and when he did finally manage to get a few words out they sounded unintelligible, at least to him. It felt as if the muscles in his mouth were refusing to work together. Unfortunately, his taste buds were functioning quite well as he recognized the foul taste of vomit in his mouth. Damn, it was awful. Considering that he felt almost too tired to manage even a swallow, he knew he wouldn't be getting anything to drink for a while.

Putting yet another discomfort aside, he looked to the doctor, hoping the man could read in his eyes that he wanted to know what was going on before he fell asleep. The doctor must have been working in the emergency room for a long time to understand what he was asking, because almost immediately he began telling him he was in shock as well as suffering from the effects of having been stunned repeatedly. Other than the twelve, small and round burn marks, which would heal in time, he would suffer no aftereffects from being stunned. What he was feeling now was muscle exhaustion, caused by multiple electrical charges. Then the stern looking doctor's face softened and he urged Duo to rest for the next few days. He also warned him that the police were anxious to have a word with him as soon as possible.

Feeling wrung out and exhausted, it didn't take more than a few moments after the doctor left before he dosed off. It seemed only a short while later that he heard his name called. With a great deal of effort he managed to force his eyes open once again. Two men, one in a police uniform and the other in the vaguely familiar tweed sports coat, stood by his bedside, each wearing the same look of grave concern.

"Sorry to disturb you, Mr. Maxwell," Mr. Tweed Coat began. Duo recognized him as having been one of the two men in the ambulance. "But it's important I talk to you while your memory is fresh. Are you able to talk?"

"I... I think so," Duo said, finding his voice as unsteady as his emotional state. He really didn't want to talk much less think about what had happened to him, but realized it was important to cooperate with the police so that they could catch the creep who had assaulted him.

Holding out his badge, he introduced himself. "My name is Detective Randall Dawson, and this is Officer Petty," he motioned to the uniformed man standing behind him. "Can you tell us what happened tonight, starting from the time you left the Palomino?"

Guilt flared within him as he recalled leaving Heero at the club after panicking at the sight of Wufei talking to him and touching him in an overly friendly way. "Where's Heero?" he croaked out.

After a slight pause, a light went on in the detective's eyes. "I believe he's waiting in the emergency room waiting for us to interview him. He's the one who found you, correct?"

"Yeah, I... he w... w...as." He didn't know if his stuttering was because of the aftereffects of being hit several times with some kind of stun gun, or if he was just too shaken up to make his mouth move.

"The person who called the 911 dispatcher identified himself as Heero Yuy. A few minutes ago, he spoke with Officer Petty and claimed to be your boyfriend and that the two of you were together at the Palomino earlier this evening. He also said you'd excused yourself to the restroom and then he'd heard from one of the staff that you were seen running out of the building. Did someone scare or threaten you in the club, or did you and he have an argument of some kind?"

Duo shook his head. He really didn't want to tell the two men about his insecurities or the reason why he'd run out of the club.

"Why did you leave the club, Mr. Maxwell?"

"I.. I saw an old friend of mine spe...aking with Heero and it upset me. I r..r..ran out of the club on impulse and didn't think better of it until I was standing at the b..bus stop." Just thinking about what happened next caused a feeling of panic to spring up inside of him. He tightly clutched the blankets covering him in his fists and brought them to his chest, reliving the feel of the man touching his body while he writhed in agony.

"I know this is upsetting, Mr. Maxwell, but I need you to recall everything that happened from the first moment you were attacked. From what the doctor told us and by the way you were attacked, I'm lead to believe that the serial murderer is responsible. But unlike his other victims, you were spared. We're hoping you'll remember something about him, any detail, whether it seems important or not, that might lead us to find the sick bastard and arrest him. We want this man off the streets and in jail."

Duo silently agreed. He wanted nothing more than to get the sick-o who attacked him into prison. "I'll try."

Most of what Duo recalled was wave after wave of pain and fear. After a half hour of careful and meticulous questioning, the two officers helped him to recall more than he thought possible. He remembered how he was grabbed, the excruciating shock to his body that he now knew came from some kind of tazer. He relived the pain, fear and panic he'd felt as he was dragged backwards, unable to do anything about it. He recalled to the officers the one word spoken by his attacker, indicating that he was definitely male. There was also the faint scent Duo remembered, thinking it came from the other man, a citrus-based cologne or after shave. It was a haunting scent, bringing back memories of his father, dressed up in a suit and going somewhere Duo couldn't remember. That memory was almost always triggered by the scent of that particular cologne, Nino Cerutti, even after all the years that had passed. And that memory had been the basis for his selecting a similar fragrance for his first cologne.

He could still recall liberally splashing it over his face, neck and chest before going on a date with Katie Sorenson while in high school. The pretty girl wrinkled her nose up after getting a good whiff of his cologne and promptly dragged him into her home and bathroom with an order to wash it off. It had been an embarrassing moment, but one in which he learned that girls don't always like the same things guys do. He now leaned towards a musk-based cologne, similar to the one Heero favored.

Despite recalling a good deal about his attack, Duo just couldn't remember seeing the man's face or clothing or anything identifiable about his attacker, and his failure to do so was a disappointment to the two policemen.

Closing his notebook and tucking it into a pocket set within the lining of his tweed jacket, Detective Dawson returned his gaze to the man lying on the bed. "Thank you for letting us take your statement tonight, Mr. Maxwell. It really is better to speak about the attack while it's still clear in your mind."

"Are you s..ure that the person who attacked me was the serial killer?"

The detective glanced at the uniformed officer for only a scant moment before moving closer to the bed. "What I'm going to tell you is confidential, and I want your word that you won't repeat it to anyone, especially to the press."

"The press?" Duo's eyes widened with alarm. "Do they have to know about this?"

"We would be hard pressed to keep this latest attack from them. This murderer has been terrorizing the gay community here in L.A., and the press is needed to keep the citizens informed about anything concerning it, within reason, of course."

The idea of having his name in the paper and that he had been attacked and assaulted by the would-be murder was horrifying. "There's no way to keep my name out of it?"

"You're an adult and the victim of a crime that concerns the community. Several people from the Palomino and surrounding businesses witnessed you being brought out of the alley. Sooner or later the press will find out who you are, if not through those witnesses than by other means, especially if we go to trial and you're called upon to testify against your attacker. In my opinion, it's better to give them one statement and then refrain from any other further comment."

"Oh God," Duo moaned, not wanting to even think about the many ramifications that would come after having his name put in newspapers or on the broadcast on the nightly news. Everyone would know he'd been assaulted. His aunt, Charise, his co-workers, even Trowa and Quatre. Would they assume he'd been raped?

"Listen," Detective Dawson caught his attention by speaking in a firm voice, "I can see how upsetting this is. I'll do what I can to keep your name out of the papers for as long as possible. That will give you a chance to inform your family and friends about what happened before it becomes public. In spite of any embarrassment you might feel, I hope you know, Mr. Maxwell, just how fortunate you were tonight. I'm assuming you know something from the news about this killer?" He waited for Duo to nod his head before continuing. "And you're aware his prime target is gays?" Another nod. "Then you probably also know that each of the victims was sexually assaulted before they died."

"No. I didn't know that," Duo said, then went on to explain. "With the long hours I put in at my job, I don't always have a chance to keep up with the news."

A feeling of revulsion swept though him as he realized that stunning him was just the beginning for what his attacker had intended to do. Twice along the spine, which he didn't realize until the doctor had told him, and once on the inside of each of his thighs and upper arms. Each hit was obviously designed to disable him. Unable to control motor movement or to defend himself, he had no doubt the man would have done his worse while he was incapacitated.

"Before I say anything more, I want your word that you won't repeat what I'm about to tell you to anyone else."

"O... okay." Duo answered hesitantly. He had an idea he wasn't going to like what the detective was about to tell him.

"Not only did the killer stun his victims repeatedly and then rape them, but he also mutilated their bodies. His one deviation for his normal pattern, up to this point, was the woman he attacked. We don't know if he targeted her because she was a lesbian, or for some other reason. He committed sodomy on her before repeatedly stabbing her chest 26 times" The detectives expression was grim as he continued. "This fucker is angry, and it's obvious his anger has something to do with gays. Whether he's some religious freak or a jilted lover, we can only guess. The only thing we know for certain is that he's going to do it again. You were unbelievably lucky tonight, Mr. Maxwell. For some reason you were spared not only the torture and murder, but also the rape. My question is, why? Do you remember anything that might account for why he didn't do anything but grope you?"

Horrified, Duo could hardly put two word together to answer the man's question. Knowing now the full extent of what had been in store for him was to appalling to think about. If his attacker had followed through with his plan, he would be dead right now, murdered in an utterly horrible manner. Putting a hand over his mouth, he moved to get out of the bed, needing to reach a sink or toilet, but his body was still twitchy and his muscles too weak to support him. Unable to escape the bed, he had no choice but to lean over the railing and throw up the bile from his stomach onto the floor.

While he coughed and gasped for air, he sensed movement in the room, and suddenly a nurse was by his side. How embarrassing, throwing up in front of a couple of policemen and having someone else pick up his mess. His embarrassment was forgotten a moment later, having been replaced by a fierce headache. Laying his forehead against the cool metal of the bed guard, he closed his eyes and concentrated on calming his body.

God, what a night. He couldn't shake the images from his mind of what he might have suffered at the hands of the man who'd attacked him only a couple of hours ago.

"I think that's enough, gentleman," the red-headed, middle aged nurse said sternly as she helped ease Duo back onto his bed. "Mr. Maxwell needs rest. I'm sure whatever else you need from him can wait until tomorrow."

The two men grudgingly nodded, but before they left Detective Dawson stepped forward. "I apologize. I certainly didn't mean to upset you further, Mr. Maxwell. I thought it important for you to know how fortunate you are and that it's imperative we catch this bastard. If you recall anything else, please call us." He took a card out of his wallet and placed it on the bedside table. "Otherwise, we'll be in touch with you if we have any more questions. Goodnight."

Duo watched through half-opened eyes as the two officers of the law left the room. "I'm sorry," he told the nurse, who had just finished calling housekeeping to come and clean up his mess.

"Don't worry about it," she said with a sympathetic grin. "There's really not much here to pick up. Besides, this happens more times than you can imagine."

"It's something I'm not in the habit of doing. I'm sorry someone else has to clean it up."

"It's what we get paid the big bucks for," she chuckled, obviously trying to sooth his embarrassment. She worked at tucking him in and then with a look of kindness and sympathy she asked. "Rough night, huh?"

"Worst ever," he replied, closing his eyes and wishing for the whole world would go the hell away.

"Do you think you can swallow some water?"

"I'd sell my soul for a drink of anything right now," he whispered tiredly. Even though the water tasted like tap water and came from a pink plastic cup, Duo didn't think he'd ever tasted anything so wonderful.

"By the way," the nurse began as she took the cup from him, refilled it and put it on the tray, "there's a really good looking guy in the waiting room who keeps asking if he can see you. Are you up for a brief visit, or should I tell him to come back in the morning?"

He could hardly believe Heero was still there. "What time is it?"

"Almost two a.m."

Maybe there was some hope after all for Heero, after, seeing he'd followed him to the hospital and stuck around, even after Wufei and everything else that had happened that night. "I'd like to see him, but can you help me clean up first? And I really need to brush my teeth."

The woman smiled knowingly, then quickly set about to helping him freshen up, washing away the lingering smell of vomit and urine and producing a toothbrush and paste.

Two minutes after she left him Heero peeked his head around the edge of the door before fully venturing into the room, and although Duo had never been more glad to see anyone, he was well aware that the lawyer looked like he'd been wrung out and left to dry. The man walked slowly to his bedside wearing a weary yet anxious expression.

"God, Duo. Are you all right?" The man's knuckles turned white as they gripped the bed rails.

"I've been better," he replied, unable to force a smile. But then the words of the police detective came back to him and he added, "but I guess I've got nothing to complain about, considering I could be dead right now."

Heero shifted, then began wringing his hands together, looking both agitated and uncertain as his eyes shifted, taking in the contents of the room, looking anywhere but at the man in the bed. Duo could only guess that the successful lawyer wasn't used to being in a hospital, or having someone he was dating in this type of situation.

As the silence between them grew, a feeling of tension did also. He wondered if Heero had followed him to the hospital and remained only because it seemed the right thing to do before he high-tailing it out the front door and his life. After what he'd just gone through, he didn't think he could stand another emotional upset, like Heero calling things off between them. He really couldn't blame the other man, though, considering how their pleasant evening had turned into a horrible disaster.

From somewhere inside he drudged up enough courage to say what needed to be said. "You don't have to do this if you don't want to," he whispered despondently, barely holding onto his emotions.

Heero blinked as if he hadn't understood. "What do you mean?"

Unable to look at the other man any longer, feeling his heart beginning to break, Duo replied, "I understand if you want to walk away. I won't hold it against you if I don't hear from you again."

"What?" Heero's voice resounded loudly in the small room. "You think that because you were attacked I wouldn't want to see you any more?" The man looked insulted by the suggestion.

Duo merely shook his head and kept his eyes averted from the man he'd fallen in love with, unable to look into Heero's eyes for fear of what he might see in them. "You look like you want to be anywhere but here," he mumbled. "And honestly, but for you, that's exactly how I feel."

The sound of bed railing being lowered was the only warning he got before he was scooped up by a pair of strong arms and awkwardly held against Heero's chest. "Idiot. Where else would I be but by your side?" Then with a deep sigh, he said, "You scared the shit out of me tonight, Duo, disappearing from the club like that. I chased after you only to find you in a dark alley with duck tape over your mouth and your body trembling uncontrollably. I've never been so damn scared in my entire life, especially after I realized you'd been attacked by the serial killer everyone is talking about."

There was a pause, and in that moment of silence Duo, with his ear pressed against Heero's chest, could clearly hear the rapid beating of his heart as well as his ragged breathing. With emotion straining his voice the lawyer added, "I almost lost you tonight, Duo, and that scared me most of all."

Those words instantly calmed his worry. Heero wasn't going to walk away, rejecting him like so many others had. He lifted his weak and shaking arms to wrap them around Heero, beneath the arms holding him tightly. Somehow, he managed to cling to the other man. "I was so afraid," he confessed in a whisper, only slightly ashamed to find himself crying against the other man's shoulder. He had been terrified earlier over what Wufei might have said to Heero about him, and to top that off, he'd been grabbed off the street and assaulted. Even a few moments ago he'd been afraid that Heero was about to walk out of his life. What an enormous relief it was knowing that Heero was still there, holding him now when he needed it the most.

"But you're here now, safe and sound, and I'll do anything to keep you that way."

They sat there for the longest time, just holding each other, grateful to have the opportunity to do so, considering Duo's attack and his miraculous, unaccountable survival.

Finally, because his back couldn't take the angle any longer, Heero eased himself from their embrace and slowly stood at the side of the hospital bed. He looked and felt like he'd been without sleep for a week. "I'd like to talk to you more about what happened tonight, why you ran from the club and about what happened before I found you, but I think the both of us are too tired to get into it tonight. The nurses wouldn't give me any information, so I don't know if you're going home tomorrow or not."

"I don't know either," Duo said as he lay back on his pillow, his exhaustion becoming almost overwhelming. "I can't see why they'd keep me. Other than weak muscles and a burns from being zapped by a stun gun a couple of times, I wasn't hurt."

"You weren't raped?" Heero asked, looking surprised.

"No!" Duo's eyes widened. "Did you think I had been?"

Heero closed his eyes as he answered. "I thought... The news reports said all the victims had been sexually assaulted, I just assumed..."

"He stopped," Duo said, sparing the man from explaining further. "I don't know why, but he stopped. Maybe he heard someone coming."

Heero frowned. "That could be, but you were pretty far back from the sidewalk. I found you at the far end of a walkway, between two buildings. I probably wouldn't have found you at all if I hadn't heard a sound of distress and thought I should investigate. Thank God I did."

If Heero hadn't investigated, he might still be there, Duo realized. With a lump in his throat he looked up at the lawyer and said, "Thank you, Heero, for coming after me. I hate to think about what would have happened if you hadn't."

The Japanese man reached out and took his hand, lifting and bringing it to his lips and placing a kiss on the back of it. "You're welcome." Then with a weary sigh, he placed Duo's hand back on the bed. "I'm beat. I better go home and grab some sleep. Are you going to be okay here by yourself?"

"I'm surrounded by people, so I guess I'm safe enough," Duo replied, though he dreaded Heero leaving.

"I'll call around nine to see if you're being released. If you are, I'll come and give you a ride home."

Since he couldn't think of anyone else who could pick him up, (although he could always call Charise in a pinch, but then he'd have to explain why he was there in the first place) he was grateful for Heero's offer and told him so. After a gentle farewell kiss, he watched Heero turn and leave the room.

Five minutes later he was wheeled out of the emergency room and into a another room for the night. Unfortunately, he shared the space with an elderly man who had been admitted after complaints of chest pain. Thankfully, the old man didn't want to talk and fell back to sleep minutes after the nurse took their vitals. In spite of the sleeping and pain pills he'd been given, Duo was fairly sure that between the old guy's snoring and the memory of the night's events, he wasn't going to be getting much rest that night. Eventually his eyes became too heavy to stay open, so as they closed he thought of Heero, and he felt like the luckiest man alive to have someone like him in his life. Regardless of what he'd been through that night, he dozed off with his thoughts centered on Heero and a small, contented smile on his face.

TBC

Note: Sorry for the delay. Louise was under the weather and I've been enjoying the Olympics all week. She sends her thanks to those of you who have wished her and the new baby well.


	15. Chapter 15

**The Pretender**  
**Part 15**

Heero called the hospital at nine a.m. sharp and learned from Duo that he was already in the process of being released. He walked into room 201 a little after ten with a paper bag containing the items requested. In Duo's opinion, the man dressed in faded blue jeans, white T-shirt and expensive sneakers looked just as good in casual attire as he did in his designer suits. Since the clothes he'd worn the night before had been taken by the police as evidence, he gladly accepted the loan of socks, sweat pants and hooded sweatshirt Heero had brought with him. After changing in the small bathroom, he was wheeled out of the hospital to the front curb by a nurse, who winked at him when the handsome lawyer moved forward to the passenger door of his car and held it open for him.

Thanking both the attendant and Heero, he eased out of the wheelchair and slipped into the car without mishap, then fastened his seat belt while Heero shut the door. He couldn't help fidgeting with the cuff of his left sleeve as he waited for Heero to walk around the back of the car and sit in the driver's seat. Seat belt on and the key in the ignition, the engine was started and Heero competently navigated the car out of the hospital driveway.

"How are you feeling?" Heero asked, breaking the awkward silence that had been growing between them with each passing moment.

"Kind of sore, but then I really have nothing to complain about, do I?"

Heero glanced his way, looking puzzled before turning his eyes back to the road. "What do you mean?"

Duo leaned back into the soft leather seat and closed his eyes as he answered, "The police detective who interviewed me last night told me some pretty upsetting things about the killer's other victims, what he did to them." His body involuntarily shuddered as he recalled that conversation.

"Like what?"

Not wanting to break his word to Detective Dawson but needing to talk to someone about the images that had haunted him most of the night, Duo said in a subdued voice, "Don't repeat this to anyone, Heero, but the killer not only raped his victims, but he also mutilated their bodies, either before or after they died."

Heero's hand moved to rest on his thigh in an attempt to comfort him. Duo acknowledged the gesture by placing his own hand on top of it. "We're very fortunate, aren't we?" Heero said softly. The "we" had Duo choking up, and he squeezed the hand beneath his, hoping to show Heero how much he appreciated him being there. "Do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head, not ready to relive the attack or talk about how he felt about it. All he really wanted was to be held by Heero and to feel safe once again. "Not yet. But I am kind of hungry."

"Would you rather stop some place to eat, or go home?"

Turning his head to study Heero's profile, he answered. "I want to go home, Heero, but do you think you could stay with me for a while? I don't want to be alone today."

Heero turned his head to smile at him before returning his attention to the road and Saturday morning traffic. "I'll fix you breakfast and then we'll decided what to do after we eat. I don't know about you, but I'm tired. I didn't sleep very well last night."

Duo returned the small smile. "Me neither." He gave Heero directions to his apartment and found his previous hesitation at having the other man in his home rather ridiculous.

Moments after entering his apartment, he headed to the bathroom to shower, after which he change into a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and a T-shirt. Heero went to the kitchen to start making breakfast. Upon exiting the steamy bathroom twenty minutes later, Duo immediately noticed music from his sound system filling the air as well as the wonderful smell of eggs and toast. He followed that tantalizing scent to the kitchen, enjoying the feel of his long hair, freshly washed, combed and drying, swaying against his back and brushing against his hips.

Pausing at the door leading to the kitchen, he drank in the sight of Heero setting the small table that was normally used more for work than for eating. Watching the handsome lawyer moving around his kitchen, performing the simple domestic task, was an image Duo didn't think he'd ever forget.

Scrambled eggs and toast had never tasted so good, Duo thought as he pushed the empty plate away. That was probably the most enjoyable breakfast he'd had in a very long time. "Thanks, Heero. That was great." He even managed a genuine smile for the chef.

"You're welcome." Heero smiled back as he stood to carry the dishes to the sink. Duo followed, carrying the two empty mugs that had held their coffee. Together they cleaned up the kitchen in no time then retired to the living room.

"I like your place," Heero said as he sat in the corner of the sofa and motioned for Duo to join him. "It's comfortable."

"I do, too, most of the time. But sometimes it feels... I don't know, empty," Duo replied, snuggling up to the handsome lawyer and enjoying having the man's arms around him. Heero was warm and solid and he smelled great. "Umm... I like this, being here with you."

"Me, too."

They sat for a long while not speaking, simply content to share each other's company. Then Heero asked, "Are you ready to talk about what happened last night?"

He really didn't want to discuss his actions the night before, but knew this conversation was inevitable, though he'd liked to have put it off for a week, or maybe ten.

"Do you want to tell me why you ran off?"

"Not really," he replied honestly, but then let out a resigned sigh. "But you deserve to know what was going on in my head at the Palomino. In fact, you deserve an explanation for everything Wufei told you."

"Wufei?" Heero questioned sharply. "What the hell has he got to do with anything?"

Duo pulled out of Heero's arms in order to look at his face and see the frown he'd heard in his voice. "When I returned from the men's room, I saw you with Wufei at the bar, and from the way he was touching you I assumed you knew him, and much more than a passing acquaintance. If he saw the two of us together on the dance floor, he probably filled your ears about me, my problem and how messed up I am."

"I've known Wufei for over a year," Heero confessed. "And I think I'd remember if he said anything about you." Heero's frown deepened as he asked, "How do you know him, and what's this about you being 'messed up'?"

Duo swallowed, recalling Dorothy's advice to tell the truth. Hoping she was right and that Heero would stick around after learning about past problems with intimacy, he decided to come clean. He toyed with one of the little white buttons on Heero' shirt, unable to look directly at the man while he nervously began his explanation. "Wufei and I met during my freshman year in college. I guess you could say he was my first boyfriend, though only for a couple of months." His face began to burn as he continued. "He seemed like a nice guy back then, and he understood that I'd never been in a relationship with a guy before, that I'd never had sex, so he was fairly patient with me. I... "

He paused, finding it almost impossible to come right out and state what his problem had been. Why was this so difficult? he wondered. Surely other people had similar problems, didn't they? He decided to go back a bit further, to remind Heero about a previous conversation about his past. "Do you remember what I told you about my aunt? About her daily lectures on the evils of homosexuality?"

"Yes."

"Well, they made quite an impression on me, not that they actually changed my orientation. You see, Quatre thinks her unrelenting lectures resulted in a form of brainwashing, and every time I... I.." he floundered again and buried his forehead against Heero's chest, wanting to escape this whole conversation. But that wouldn't be fair to Heero, would it? The man had a right to know, especially if they were going to go any further with their relationship.

He felt the other man's hand stroke the back of his head and down the long hair to his shoulders. A gentle kiss placed near his temple was comforting as well. Gently, Heero urged, "Go on, Duo. You can tell me anything."

"I'm afraid to tell you, Heero. I don't want to lose you."

"I'm not going anywhere," Heero answered with a firm resolve. Then more gently he said, "But I can see this is really bothering you, so please, just tell me. After almost losing you last night, I'm not about to walk away because of something in your past."

Duo took a deep breath and prayed he wouldn't lose Heero like he'd lost every other guy he'd dated. "Wufei, and everyone else I've ever dated, left me because I... I wasn't able to have sex with them."

The hand petting his hair stilled. "What do you mean?" Heero asked.

Holding tightly to Heero's shirt, fearing the man might fly out the door the minute he answered, he took a deep breath and said, "I think Aunt Helen was successful; systematically poisoning my mind in regards to homosexuality. Each and every time I tried to become intimate with a guy I heard her voice in my head telling me I was committing a sin, an unnatural act against man and nature. She insisted that any man who tried to have sex with me was taking advantage of me for his own pleasure. And once he had what he wanted, he'd dump me like yesterday's garbage for someone else. Those and a dozen other negative comments, delivered in my aunt's scandalized voice, were repeated over and over in my head whenever I tried to get close to someone.

"Wufei found out about my problems because I experienced my first episode when I tried to have sex with him. But my freaking out wasn't the main reason why we broke up. I found out the jerk was sleeping with other guys while he played the patient, understanding boyfriend with me. I dumped him the instant I found out, but then I got my comeuppance when I was dumped in return by almost every guy I've ever gone out with, ending with Trowa who, as you know, also gave up on me and hooked up with my shrink."

Now having confessed, Duo squeezed his eyes shut and waited for Heero's response, which came a moment later, though it wasn't what he expected.

"You didn't seem to have a problem with sex when we first met."

"I started seeing a new therapist, besides Quatre. She specializes in sexual problems."

"And how did she help you when he couldn't?"

"Well, one thing she taught me was how to escape the voice in my head by replacing it with a fantasy."

"A fantasy?" Heero sounded puzzled. After a long moment he asked, "Is that why you told me your name was Laredo? Was that a part of your fantasy?"

Duo nodded, knowing Heero could feel his answer. This was really embarrassing. "With the setting, and you looking like a studly cowboy, fit right into my fantasy of being a employee of the western brothel."

"Wait," Heero suddenly grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed away from his chest so that they were face to face. "Are you telling me that when we had sex in the hot tub that it was the first time for you? You were a virgin?"

Duo bit his lip and gave a slight nod of his head, only to find himself pulled back into Heero's arms again and held tightly. "Oh God, baby, I didn't know. I was so rough, having been caught up in the moment. I could have made it so much better for you."

"No. It was good. Really, " Duo insisted, loving the way Heero was holding him, as if he would never let go. And did Heero just call him baby?

"You were the answer to my prayers, Heero. The person who finally freed me from the disparaging voice in my head as well as my fears."

Nestled against Heero's chest with his face buried in the other man's neck, Duo couldn't think of any other place in the world he'd rather be.

"So you're... cured?" Heero asked.

Now wasn't that the million dollar question? "I hope so," he answered. "Guess I won't really know until I have sex a second time."

A deep rumble under his ear told him Heero was amused by something. "I'm ready whenever you are."

Even though Duo was anxious to find out if he could have sex again, he was feeling frayed at the edges and desperately needed to sleep. "Maybe later. Right now I feel like I could sleep for a week. Want to take a nap with me instead?"

"Here or on your bed?"

With only a moment's hesitation he answered, "Bed."

Duo led the other man into his bedroom and was grateful that he'd actually made the bed and picked up before going to work the day before. He wasn't normally a freak about tidiness, but he did like to keep his apartment neat. "I have an extra pair of sleep pants if you'd like to be more comfortable. Just let me braid my hair first."

Eying his long hair, Heero asked, "Can't you leave it down?"

"Hell no," he answered as he split the length of his hair into thirds and rapidly wove it into a neat and tidy braid. "With all the tossing and turning I do when sleeping, I'd never get the knots out of it."

"Do you ever wear it down?" Heero asked while pulling back the covers on the bed.

Wrapping an elastic band around the bottom of the braid, Duo replied with a grin and wink, "Only on special occasions." Then with a nod towards the other man he asked, "So, do you want something to sleep in?"

Now it was Heero's turn to grin. "I generally sleep in the nude, but if that bothers you I can sleep in my boxers."

Duo could feel his body heating up at the thought of sleeping next to Heero in all his naked glory. Quickly sliding between the sheets and pulling the covers over himself he answered, "I just want you to be comfortable."

The sparkle in Heero's eyes told him that the handsome lawyer was enjoying his discomfort. Turning, Heero moved to close the curtains to the sliding glass door that led to the small balcony just outside. Finishing that, he returned to the bed, removing his clothing with each step. His shirt was the first to go, and then he stepped out of his shoes and pulled off his sock, tossing them behind him. He then began to unfasten his jeans while Duo watched, unable to turn his eyes away from the wonderful sight before him. How he craved to put his hands on the other man, to run them over that well-formed chest. Heero was nearly hairless except for the dark patch beneath his arms and the fine trail leading from just above his navel and disappearing beneath the waistband of his boxer briefs. And what those wonderfully fitted shorts outlined was just breathtaking. Wearing only the blessedly clinging undergarment and a smug smirk, Heero climbed under the covers and immediately shifted closer to the center of the bed. "Come here," he said, opening his arms to Duo. There was no hesitation in accepting that invitation.

It took a few moments for the two men to settle comfortably, with Heero on his back and Duo pressed against his left side, his head resting on a solid shoulder while his right arm and leg were draped comfortably over the man. Duo snuggled as close as he could and thought that this was probably as close to heaven as he was going to get. "This is nice," he murmured as his eyes began to droop. And in the midst of a yawn he added, "I feel safe in your arms."

A deep chuckle sounded under his ear. "Go to sleep, Duo. I'll be right here when you wake up." With a smile on his lips, he happily complied.

******************

Maybe it was because he was in his own apartment, his own bed and very comfortable that Duo slept so well and for so long. When he woke some time later, from a pleasant dream he couldn't quite remember, he heard soft sounds in the background. It took him a moment to realized it was coming from the television. He shifted slightly, stretched a bit, then felt a shifting behind him a moment before strong arms wrapped around his upper body, which then brought back to his mind who was with him.

Opening his eyes and blinking until they focused, he turned his head and gazed up at Heero's handsome face. Those beautiful blue eyes, framed by long, ebony eyelashes, seemed to pull him in and hold him close. "Hey there." He greeted the other man with a goofy grin, thinking, damn, I'd like to wake up like this every day. "What time is it?"

Heero's smile warmed him to his soul as he answered. "Almost six."

"At night?" He couldn't have been more shocked.

Heero's hand brushed away the errant hair hanging over his eyes. "You were understandably tired."

"Sorry, I really didn't mean to sleep so long. In fact, after all that's happened, I'm really surprised I didn't have any nightmares."

Heero touched his nose teasingly. "Maybe it's the company you keep."

Duo chuckled. "I'm sure that's it." And then he remembered. "I have to get up and make some calls."

"Business?" asked Heero.

Shaking his head, the long haired man lay his head back on his pillow so that he could look up Heero now leaning over him as he answered. "Not really. Detective Dawson said he'd try to buy me some time to contact friends and family before my name was found out by the press. I thought I should call those who might freak out hearing my name associated with the latest serial killer's attack."

"Your boss?"

"Definitely at the top of the list."

Heero again combed the unruly hair away from his face and asked, "How about I fix you something to eat first?"

"I'm not very hungry, but I'll bet you're starving. Did you really stay here all day?"

"I promised I would," Heero said with a sexy smile. "Besides, there was something in it for me as well. I got to hold you all day." The lawyer then leaned over and brushed his lips in a soft kiss.

Pulling back, both men smiled. "Dinner?" Heero asked again.

"Sure, but what I really need right now is the bathroom. Be back in a minute." Duo rolled out of bed and tried to hide how stiff and sore he was as he made his way to the adjoining bathroom, his aching bladder about to burst.

Business attended to, he washed his face, brushed his teeth and carried a brush back to the bedroom, intending to comb out and re-braid his long hair. Heero was sitting on the bed watching as he approached, his eyes scrutinizing his every movement. "You're hurting, aren't you?"

"Just a bit," Duo answered with a dismissive shrug. The pain resulting from that small movement had him promising himself not to repeat that gesture for a day or two. Getting back into bed, he brought his braid over his shoulder and removed the black elastic band.

"Here, let me help you with that."

Grateful for the help, he handed the brush over to Heero then closed his eyes and simply enjoyed the feeling of fingers combing through the unraveling braid. And then came the careful, slow brushing, beginning at the crown of his head and moving down to the very end of the long mass. It felt wonderful. Tilting his head up just slightly, Duo had no idea the picture he presented to Heero, that the gesture of tilting his head was like an invitation, one that the lawyer found too hard to resist. Warm, moist lips touched the sensitive skin between neck and shoulder. Duo found it very arousing and tilted his head further to the side, giving Heero easier access.

Heero slowly, methodically, moved his lips slowly over Duo's exposed neck and then his face. He took his time, or so it seemed to Duo, to get to his lips. He'd even shifted his head indicating that his lips craved to be kissed. Heero eased him back down to his pillow and remained above him, even though the position couldn't be very comfortable. It didn't take long for him to realize that Heero had every intention of tasting as much of his body as possible. Yet before he could go any further, the memory from the night before came rushing back, and the feel of other hands touching him and the threat they'd posed brought back the terror. Desperate to escape, he pushed against Heero's shoulders in an effort to make him stop. Heero pulled back and looked down at him, wearing a confused expression.

Struggling to catch his breath and contain his fear, he gasped, "Sorry. I'm sorry." Then calming slightly, knowing that Heero wasn't who he was afraid of, he calmed and said, "It's not that I don't want to be with you, Heero. I'm just not at my best at the moment, mentally or physically. I'm sorry, but right now I don't think I'm capable of doing much more than kissing." He gently touched the other man's cheek and asked, "Rain check?"

The blank look on Heero's face seemed to indicate he was thinking over the situation, or that's what Duo thought at first. Then a horrible thought came to him; what if Heero was thinking he was a cock tease, just like Wufei had named him. Quickly reaching up to hold the other man's face with both hands, he said, "Heero, please believe me. I do want to be with you. I was looking forward to last night, even though I was a bit nervous about it. It's just..."

"Shh," Heero put two fingers over the braided man's lips. "I understand. You don't have to say anything more, and quit apologizing. There's no rush. We have all the time in the world, don't we?"

Duo couldn't answer with his heart in his throat. How in the world had he found such a wonderful, understanding man? "Damn, Heero. You're making it hard for me not to throw myself at you. If I could, I would, you know?"

The blue eyed man smiled before lowering his head to place a quick kiss on the tip of Duo's nose. "That's good to know."

They spent another ten minutes or simply touching and kissing before Duo reminded Heero of the phone calls he had to make. Reluctantly, he moved into the other room and picked up his phone, hitting number 2 on his speed dial. Charise answered on the fifth ring.

After explaining the reason for his call, his boss had been rendered speechless... for about fifteen seconds. Of course she'd heard about the aborted attack by the alleged serial killer, she'd said after finding her voice, but she'd never once entertained the thought that it might be someone she knew and cared about, someone she depended on nearly every day of the week. "Holy shit, Duo." It had finally sunk in. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah, just a bruise and a couple of burn spots," he replied.

"I just... I can't believe this." Fear was now evident in her voice. "What were you doing out that late by yourself? You know this killer prowls the streets looking for potential gay victims. What on earth were you thinking?"

"I wasn't out by myself," he replied defensively. "I was on a date and something came up. I stepped outside to clear my head and had just decided to go back to the bar a man attacked me from behind."

Sounds of distress came from the other side of the line. "When I think of what might have happened, I..." The famous designer was about to lose it, and so Duo thought it wise to interrupt before she broke down in tears.

"Please don't, Charise. I've had enough of those horrifying thoughts running through my head since this happened."

"Of course, I'm so sorry. Do you want to take a couple of days off? I know things are crazy at the office, but your health and well being are important to me."

Duo thought about the offer for a moment before coming to a decision, "No, I think it would be better if I kept busy. But would you mind if I come in a little late on Monday? I'm a bit sore and it might take me a while to get up in the morning and get to work on time."

"Yes, come in any time you want. I'll have Deirdre fill in for you until you show up. Are you sure there's nothing else I can do for you? I could send a car to pick you up for work?"

"No. That's not necessary, but thanks," Duo replied, hoping this conversation wasn't going to last much longer. He still had to call his aunt. "I'll see you in the office, okay?"

"All right, dear. But call me if you need anything, anything at all, understand?"

"Yes, and thanks, Charise."

They finally managed to say goodbye and Duo took a moment to brace himself for the next, most difficult call.

Heero remained standing in the doorway of the bedroom, listening as Duo told his aunt what had happened. The older women, who had a good amount of undeserved devotion and affection from her nephew in spite of the harm and mental anguish she'd caused him, did not take the news of his being attacked very well. While Heero could only hear one side of the conversation, he could tell by Duo's expression and his replies that his aunt was very upset. With his head bowed and buried into his upraised hand, the braided man listened for ten minutes before he pleaded; "Please stop, Aunt Helen. I can't listen to this any longer. No, don't cry. You did all you could, but I can't help that I'm gay."

The heartbreaking in Duo's voice pulled Heero into the room. The braided man looked up at his approach and the sad look in his eyes was so profound that Heero felt he had to do something to help. Taking the phone out of his hand, he raised it to his own ear.

The woman on the other end of the line was still talking and crying at the same time.

"I tried, Duo. God knows I did everything I could think of to discourage this type of behavior. I told you over and over again that being gay isn't natural. It can only lead you to unhappiness and an ugly end. You could have been murdered last night because you insist on living this unnatural lifestyle. You..."

"Excuse me," Heero interjected forcefully. He'd heard enough, and it was all he could do to contain his anger.

"Who is this? Where's Duo?" The older woman's voice sounded panicked.

"Duo's right here, and he's fine. If you love him, like he thinks you do, you should be expressing gratitude and relief that he's alive instead of haranguing him with your bigotry. He cares for you, enough to call and warn you that his name might be in the papers regarding the attack, and this is how you treat him? If you can't offer him words of comfort at this difficult time then maybe you don't love him as much as you say you do. And if that's the case, this call is over."

The older women sounded stunned when she asked, "Wait... who are you?"

There was a long pause as Heero looked into Duo's sad eyes, and it was then that he knew exactly what he was to the other man. With a soft smile aimed at the man watching him he answered, "I'm Duo's boyfriend. Good night."

Placing the phone back, Heero sat down next to the wide-eyed man, put his arm around his shoulders and gave him a side hug.

"Thanks," Duo said in a strained voice.

"You're welcome." After a few moments Heero ventured to ask, "How many more calls do you need to make?"

Duo thought he should probably call Dorothy, and then the image of Trowa flashed in his mind. Even though he'd broken ties with his former boyfriend/friend, Trowa would be horrified if he heard his name in the news in conjunction to the latest, though aborted, attack by the serial killer. Then a brilliant idea came to him; why not kill two birds with one stone?

"I only have one more call to make." He picked up the phone once again and hit the speed dial number for Dorothy's cell phone. Getting the answering machine, Duo had only a few seconds to decided whether or not to leave a message, informing her of what had happened. He took a breath and waited for the beep. "Dorothy, this is Duo. Listen, something happened last night and I thought you should know in case my name pops up in the news. I'm alright, but I was attacked last night. The police say it was the serial killer. Something stopped him, and I'm alive and relatively well. I was wondering if you could do me a really big favor. Could you call Quatre and Trowa and let them know what happened and that they don't need to worry? I think they might freak out if they hear my name on T.V." He gave her Trowa's phone number, then brought his message to a close with, "Thanks, I'll talk to you later."

After setting the phone back on the table, Duo turned to find Heero watching him carefully. "Are you really all right?"

Duo nodded, "I'm glad you're here, though. You've definitely made this part of the night so much easier. Thanks for speaking with my aunt and not yelling at her. I know she says some pretty terrible things, but she's the only family I have left, and in her own way, she loves me. I'm just a big disappointment to her."

Not able to bear seeing the other man in such low in spirits, Heero raised his hand to cup Duo's cheek, then leaned in and kissed him, softly at first, showing him tenderness and understanding. Duo raised his arms and wrapped them around his neck and clung tightly to him. The kiss deepened slowly, and Heero carefully lowered the both of them down onto the sofa.

"We're not going to do anything until you're ready, but for now I just want to hold and comfort you, to help soothe your troubles and fears. You're obviously feeling vulnerable after everything that's happened, and I have no desire to take advantage of you." Heero pulled back, and Duo let him, even though he wanted to stay pressed against the body that had been so nicely molded to his body. With a final teasing kiss to the tip of the slightly upturned nose, Heero smiled at him and asked, "Feeling better?"

Duo smile came a bit more easily. "Yeah, thanks."

"How about some dinner? I can go out and pick something up and bring it back, if you'd like."

His response wasn't what either of them had anticipated. Grabbing Heero's upper arms in a vice-like grip, Duo was filled with a desperate fear as he pleaded, "No, Heero. Don't go. It's dark out. He might be out there."

It then dawned on the lawyer that Duo was afraid for him, fearing the killer might attack him. "It's all right, Duo," he soothed. "I'll be safe just running to the store."

"No! Don't go. Please."

Pulling the anxious man into his arms, Heero held him close while rubbing his back, hoping to calm and reassure him. "I understand your fear, so I'll stay. But the chances of the serial killer being in this neighborhood are slim to none. I promise we're safe here."

Duo leaned into Heero's shoulder as the nightmare he'd lived through Friday night came rushing back, as well as all of the descriptions from the detective of what the killer had in store for him had he followed through with his plans. The possibility of Heero being attacked and butchered by the unknown killer was something he didn't want to think about. He'd lost so many people who had been dear to him: his parents and cousin Natalie to death, his uncle Hank, Trowa, Wufei and others he'd dated. He couldn't bear the thought of losing Heero, not when he'd finally found the man he'd been waiting so long for.

"Shh, it's all right, Duo. I'm not going anywhere."

Embarrassed but unable to help how he was acting, Duo decided he should try to tell Heero what was going on in his mind. But how did he explain something he himself didn't fully understand. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I've never felt this frightened or needy before. But I can't bear the thought of losing you." He then buried his face in the other man's neck and tried his damn best to compose himself.

The hand rubbing his back paused, and Duo stiffened, wondering if he'd revealed too much of himself, if Heero was put off by this show of neediness. Then two strong arms tightened their hold on him, and in his ear he heard the whispered reply, "You've just survived a horrifying experience, so it's understandable that you'll be emotionally off balance for a while. But you don't need to worry about me; I'm not going anywhere."

Heero paused for a moment before letting out a frustrated huff and tackling a new subject. "I know we've only been seeing each other for a few weeks, but being with you, Duo, feels... I don't know if I can explain how I feel other than to say that being with you feels right. In fact, I..." After a hesitant pause, Heero continued in a voice so soft Duo could hardly hear him confess, "what I feel for you is stronger than anything I've felt for any other man I've dated."

That was good to know. While Heero hadn't exactly made a declaration of love, he was content in knowing he was important to the other man. Relishing the comfort of Heero's warm embrace, Duo struggled closer and decided it was a good time for him to make a little confession of his own. "I think I'm falling in love with you, Heero. From the first moment I saw you I somehow knew this could happen. I thought I knew what love was, especially when I was with Trowa, but now I know my feelings for him wasn't anything like what I feel for you."

There was a touch of humor in Heero's voice when he asked, "Could that be because we had sex only moments after saying hello?"

A hint of pink rose on the braided man's cheeks as he answered, "That might have helped. But honestly, it's the time we've spent together here in the city that's convinced me that you were someone I could let into my life, especially after this weekend. You've been here for me, cared for me and even stood up to my aunt in the kindest way possible. It's almost impossible not to fall in love with you."

"I want you so much," Heero whispered, his lips against the soft, chestnut colored hair. "I can't tell you how relieved I am, knowing you feel the same as I do. It's also a huge turn on." Then after a sigh he added, "But I realize now isn't the time. We need to get past what happened to you Friday night before moving forward with our relationship."

Pulling back and untangling himself from the hold Duo had on him, Heero looked at him with what Duo thought was a look of resolve. "So instead of making love, what do you think about raiding your refrigerator for something to eat, since you don't want me venturing out tonight?"

Thinking it over, Duo replied, "I think I have some frozen entrees in the freezer, and a couple cans of soup in the pantry." He managed a smile for Heero, and was grateful the man hadn't push for anything more to happen between them at the moment. He wasn't sure how he'd react when the memory of the serial killer's hands on his body still fresh in his mind.

Heero seemed almost reluctant to let go of him before he finally stood up from the sofa. He turned and smiled down at him, holding out his hand. Duo gladly took it and allowed himself to be pulled up and led towards the kitchen. Heero moved slowly enough that none of the aches and pains he had weren't aggravated further.

The soup was thoroughly heated and grilled cheese sandwiches were toasted to perfection when the phone began to ring. Duo intended to ignore it in favor of his dinner, but when the answering machine clicked on, Trowa's pleading voice could be heard all the way into the kitchen. "Dorothy just called and told me what happened. Duo, please pick up and tell me yourself that you're all right. This is a nightmare. You could have been killed by that psycho." There was a pause before he continued. "I know you're angry with us, and maybe you've got a right to be angry, but please don't make me worry for days on end wondering if you're really okay. I still care about you; we both do. You're my best friend, Duo..."

During Trowa's pleading message, Heero looked at Duo's troubled expression and asked, "Mind if I handle this?"

It took only a moment before giving his consent with a nod. Heero had handled his aunt in a satisfactory manner, so why not Trowa? He watched as his very attractive boyfriend walked into the living room and hit the speaker phone button, cutting Trowa off in the middle of another entreaty for Duo to answer the phone.

"Hello, Trowa."

"Who's this?" Trowa demanded.

"Heero, Duo's boyfriend. I can assure you he's fine, or he will be in a day or two. He just wanted to warn you in case his name happened to appear in the news or the press. He was hit with a stun gun several times and has a few bruises. Otherwise, he's fine."

"Can I speak with him?"

Heero looked to the kitchen to see Duo peeking around the corner. With a shake of his head, Heero had his answer. "No. He's not up to talking any more tonight. Listen," Heero began on a new note. "I understand that things are strained between you, your boyfriend and Duo. I think for the time being it would be best if you'd refrain from contacting him until he shows some indication that he wants you back into his life."

"Is that Duo's idea or yours?" Trowa sounded more concerned than angry. "And how do I know that you're not trying to keep him from the phone, that what you're saying is really what he wants."

"Trust me. I know what Duo wants, and at the moment it's not you or your lover."

"And you think you're all he needs?" It was obvious from his tone of voice that Trowa was becoming even more upset.

Heero's eyes remained focused on Duo, looking for the answer to that question. He stood and walked towards Heero, and tilted his head up, initiating a long and passionate kiss that seemed to take Heero's breath away.

"Are you there? Hello? Duo, can you hear me? Are you all right? What's happening?" Trowa's voice rose in volume with each question.

With a loud smacking sound signaling the parting of their lips, Duo smiled at Heero before leaning over his shoulder to say, "What we're doing is none of your damn business, Trowa. I'm fine, by the way, thanks to Heero. Now say goodbye and take my boyfriend's advice, don't call again until you hear from me." Leaning just a bit further, Duo hit the off button then straightened in Heero's arms with a satisfied grin on his face.

Standing mere inches from the other man, he wasn't expecting the sudden movement that lifted him from the carpet to press his lean body up against Heero's hard chest, leaving his feet dangling and bringing their faces together. He stared into Heero's blue eyes, seeing himself reflected in those deep pools of blue. Duo's smile faltered slightly, sensing something momentous rising between them. No words were said as Heero closed the distance between them, capturing his mouth in a kiss that was nothing short of smoldering. With each passing moment the tide of passion rose to a tumultuous desire.

All fear and hesitation fell away from the braided man as he wrapped his arms tightly around Heero's neck and gave himself up to Heero, his mouth opening to accept the hot probing tongue. His fingers wove themselves into the dark brown hair, which he pulled gently to realign their mouths to change and deepen the kiss. Pressed tightly against Heero's firm chest, feet still off the floor, Duo felt the heat of the other man radiate through his clothing, and the hard impression of Heero's growing excitement press against his thigh. He was fairly certain Heero could feel his response in return.

He didn't know how long they kissed like that, but it came to a point where Duo could take no more. Forcefully pulling his head back and gasping for breath, he breathlessly managed to say, "Make love to me, Heero."

The impassioned yet concerned blue eyes studied his face for a long moment before the lawyer asked, "Are you sure? I'm not certain it's a good idea right now."

"I love you, Heero, and right now I need you more than I need anything else in this world. Help me forget last night. Give me a new memory to blot out the memory of that man's hands touching me. Please, Heero."

Instead of setting him down on his feet, Heero cupped his bottom and urged Duo to wrap his legs around his waist. He then walked them into the bedroom and gently eased them both down onto the bed, still tangled up in each other arms.

Not wanting to think too much about what they were about to do, Duo began the task of removing Heero's clothes, peeling the shirt over his head and pulling down his jeans, pausing only to allow Heero to tug his shirt over his head and to step out of his pants after they pooled around his ankles.

Then Heero was on top of him, his firm chest pinning him down, his thigh pressed over his groin. With hands brushing his hair away from his face, the man above him looked into his eyes with a smile on his lips. "You're beautiful, Duo. Probably the most beautiful man I've ever known." Before he could return the compliment, Heero captured his lips again. Duo threw his head back as those magical lips began a journey down his neck to his chest and every so slowly moved even further. This touch was so very different from the man who's assaulted him. Heero's mouth and hands seemed to worship him, to claim and gently posses him, while the other's touch had made him feel violated and dirty.

Gasping, Duo's mouth fell open as one wonderful sensation after another rippled through his body. He didn't know if he'd ever felt anything as good as having Heero's mouth on his body. The coiling sensations in his lower belly warned him that he wasn't too far away from coming. He arched his hips upward, hoping to bury himself deeper into Heero's mouth when all of a sudden that wonderful warmth was gone.

"Don't stop now," he moaned his frustration.

"Only for a moment." The popping of a top and snap of a foil wrapper brought him back to some portion of reality. And then it happened, his aunt's voice began to creep into his thought. _This is wrong. Get up and run while you can. He's only using you._ Opening his eyes, hoping to dispel the voice in his head, he watch Heero slip on the condom and then put a portion of lube on his fingertips.

The moment those fingers began to prepare him, the recriminating voice in his head began the familiar lecture about sodomy being a sin in the eyes of God and an act against man's natural nature. He quickly refocused his attention on Heero, not wanting his aunt to once again ruin everything. But by the time Heero raised his legs and set them over his shoulders, the voice in Duo's head was screaming at him to get the hell out of there right now, that Heero was only using his body for his own carnal pleasure. He was breathing too fast, almost unable to catch a breath as something smooth and slick touch his entrance. He started to shake his head, trying to tell Heero he couldn't do this.

"Duo?"

Looking up into the eyes of the man above him, Duo felt an overwhelming sense of failure. It seemed the first time he and Heero had sex had been a fluke. He wasn't cured at all. "I... I can't," he whispered in a shaky voice filled with shame and regret.

Heero pressed forward. Lifting Duo's legs closer to his chest, he brought his body down on top of him, his face coming within an inch or two of Duo's. Reaching out, his fingertips tenderly brushed the hair away from his forehead gave Duo a smile that nearly melted his insides. In a deep sexy voice and smile that matched, Heero said, "You are incredible, Laredo. Your violet eyes and dazzling smile make me want to keep you in this bed all night long. They say you're from San Francisco. Is that right?"

Duo blinked, not comprehending for a moment what Heero was doing, and then he realized Heero's intentions. He closed his eyes, recalling the cowboy from the Light on the Hill, how looked in his jeans, boots and cowboy hat as he sat on the fence of the corral. A smile twitched at the corner of his lips and his eyelids slowly opened. "Yes, I'm from Frisco," he replied in what he hoped was a sexy drawl. "But I've grown weary of bankers and business men sneaking around behind the backs of their devoted wives, so I accepted a generous offer to come here, and I look forward to discovering what it's like to be with salt-of-the-earth men. Tell me, Tex, are all cowboys as good looking as you? If they are, I think I'm really gonna like it here."

As he answered, Heero's cowboy accent and mischievous grin were both sexy and amusing. "Well now, I don't know about other cow pokes, Fancy Pants, but I've never met a courtesan like you But if'n you don't mind, I think we've had about enough talk. Having been out on the range herding cattle for three weeks, I've got here a rather urgent and pressing need." Thrusting his hip just slightly, Duo felt the solid weight of Heero's arousal against his balls. Then the man pinning him to the bed added, "I might just spend my entire month's pay on you this weekend. You've got quite the reputation, Laredo. It's rumored you've got a lot of fancy ways of pleasing a man and I plan to find out whether or not that's true."

Closing his eyes for just a moment, Duo imagined himself in the fancy brothel he'd visited briefly weeks before, in the same position he was in now in an upstairs room with Tex. He could see it in his mind, feel the heated body pressed against his own and the firm erection waiting for admittance. Once again he was Laredo, the beautiful, renowned and experienced courtesan from San Francisco, and Heero was a cowboy who was paying for both his time and talents. He felt himself responding to the fantasy and to the other man's nearness. With his arms wrapped around the cowboy's shoulders, he pulled him down and hungrily devoured his lips, thrusting his tongue into the welcoming mouth, finding a challenge there. After wrapping his legs around the man on top of him, he finally wrenched his mouth away for a breath. Looking up into Heero's eyes he demanded, "Take me now, make me yours for the night."

Despite the rather uncomfortable position, doubled in half as he was, Duo pulled down, again bringing Heero's mouth to his own once again. And then his lover was pressing into him. He moaned from the initial discomfort. It stung and burned as his body stretched to accommodate his lover.

Lifting his head, Heero softly said, "Relax, it will help ease the discomfort." He complied to the best of his ability, but it was difficult. Then those wonderful, magical lips were placing soft, fleeting kisses across his face and neck, and a hand slipped between their two bodies to ease another kind of ache. Almost instantly he became like dry kindling, bursting into a blaze of heat once it met the red hot flame.

Heero began to move, gently at first but he soon picked up the pace with growing enthusiasm. The bed's headboard began to bump against the wall as Heero's thrusts became more urgent and their coupling reached a thrilling crescendo. With a gasp and a long, low moan, Heero pushed thrust forward once more and then held himself rigid as he came. Meanwhile, Duo closed his eyes as the orgasmic tide swept him away. He collapsed, head, arms and legs falling heavily onto the mattress as Heero collapsed on top of him.

After a moment, his lover raised his weight up and shifted slightly to rest on his elbows. He pushed the slightly damp hair away from Duo's forehead and searched his face for any sign of discomfort. "Are you okay?" he asked. "I'm afraid I got carried away, again."

Duo nodded and took a deep breath before opening his eyes. He smiled at the man above him. "That was... unbelievably wonderful," he answered. "How did you know that pretending to be Laredo again would help me when I didn't think I could do it?"

Heero's fingers traced Duo's face before kissing the tip of his pert nose. "Sudden inspiration."

"And you didn't mind?"

"The pretending? Not if it helps," Heero answered with a shrug. "Hopefully, the more we're together the more comfortable you'll become and we can put the pretending behind us at some point."

"I want that, too," Duo said as he lifted his hands and buried them in Heero's hair. "Have I told you how much I love your hair?"

"It can't possibly be as much as I love yours," Heero said while taking hold of the thick braid lying on the pillow and lowering his face in order to kiss Duo's mouth. Duo had intended to keep the kiss brief and teasing, but he found it impossible not deepen it until once again their kissing became desperate and hungry. He suspected he would never get enough of the lawyer.

Duo threw back his head and gasped with pleasure, and Heero was quick to attack his neck with kisses. He moaned his lover's name as those lips continued lower, lips and tongue teasing the breath out of him and reducing him into a quivering mass of need. Heero took him into his mouth, and he couldn't help another gasp and moan as his lover pleasured him. Just as he was about to come, Heero released him.

"I helped you pretend to be Laredo earlier, but this time I want you to know it is me who is bringing you pleasure, not Tex. I'll be patient, Duo, and understanding as well until you get over your phobias completely, because I believe the reward at the end, having you as my lover, is worth any inconvenience or pretending we might have to do."

Having stated his position, Heero slowly blew a slow breath of warm air along his length before taking up where he left off.

Duo collapsed down into the pillow once again, having been sexually wrung out by Heero's talented hands and mouth. His arms lay limp, raised above his head. He was too tired to even think of moving as Heero crawled up his warm and moist body to place a soft kiss on his lips, getting a brief taste and smell of himself on the other man's mouth.

"Tired?"

Duo nodded in response to the question.

"Then go to sleep. I'm going to the bathroom to clean up a bit. I'll be right back."

Giving the man another nod, Duo felt a blanket being drawn over his naked body and a tender kiss placed on his cheek a moment before he felt movement on the other side of the bed and heard the quiet footfalls as Heero made his way to the bathroom. With a sigh of contentment on his lips he drifted into the dark void of sleep, unaware of when or even if Heero came back to bed.

TBC

Author: Thanks again to all you made this a favorite story or reviewed. Darn it, I think I've picked up some spy ware, and it keeps interfering with my logging on. Hopefully I'll figure out how to get it out by myself. I don't know. It's an XP 2010 ad that won't let me even get on Internet Explorer unless I buy the anti-virus package. Fat chance of that happening after they took over my internet. I've already got a security package in place, but it doesn't seem to recognize this spy ware. Anybody have any idea how to get rid of it?


	16. Chapter 16

**The Pretender  
****Part 16**

Heero stayed the entire weekend; two days Duo would always treasure. After successfully having sex with Heero a second time, he sensed a transformation had taken place inside of him. The fear and inhibitions that reared up whenever he attempted some form of intimacy had miraculously disappeared, leaving him free to touch and tease his boyfriend and no longer fearful of where his actions would lead. This was a completely new experience for him. Along with this newfound freedom came an inability to keep his hands off his boyfriend. Heero didn't seem to mind in the least. Damn, but he felt liberated, empowered even.

So to recap the weekend, they spent the remainder of Saturday evening in bed, and the night sleeping off and on and recovering bit by bit from Friday night's ordeal. Sunday was spent enjoying other pleasurable activities, interspersed by eating and talking when it was absolutely necessary for their bodies to rest and revive. Even then it was nearly impossible for either of them of keep their hands to themselves.

As Sunday afternoon began to wind down, Duo slipped into the kitchen with the intention of getting something for them to eat. He opened the refrigerator only to discover there was nothing inside worth eating. It looked like a trip to the corner store was unavoidable. Yet the mere thought of leaving the safety of his apartment filled him with apprehension. He mentioned the lack of food to Heero when the man pressed up against his back to stare into the near empty refrigerator from over his shoulder. He secretly hoped Heero would agree to calling out for something, not feeling up to going out or being left alone.

"I suppose we should get dressed and go shopping," Heero said while nibbling on his ear.

"I'm not really all that hungry," Duo replied, lying through his teeth. Not only was his stomach empty, but it felt hollowed out, but he'd put up with any physical discomfort if it meant not leaving his apartment. "There might be some crackers in the cupboard. We could put peanut butter on them."

"How can you not be hungry? I'm positively starved. Crackers and peanut butter is not going to be enough to fill me. Come on, let make a quick trip to the store and I'll make you a steak dinner you'll never forget."

The warmth of Heero's body lingered even after he pulled away from him. Duo turned to follow. "I... I don't want to go out, Heero" he confessed in a small voice, ashamed of his fear in the presence of such a strong man.

Heero's eyes were soft with understanding as put his hands on Duo shoulders and he said, "I know, but that's all the more reason why we need to go. I'll be right there with you. Nothing will happen, I promise. The person who attacked you has no idea who you are or where you live. Hell, he probably doesn't even know what you look like, having attacked you in the dark. You're safe, Duo, as much as you've ever been living in L.A."

Heero was clearly trying to assuage his fears with logic, but this time his words held no comfort. From past experience, Duo knew his fears weren't always logical. He was about to dig in his heels and refuse to leave his apartment when Heero added, "Besides, you'll have to leave your apartment for work tomorrow morning. If going out is going to be a problem, we better nip it in the bud while I'm here." Okay, that convinced him he needed to suck it up and go to the store.

Fifteen minutes later the two men walked out the front door of Duo's apartment building. For the braided man, each step was taken reluctantly while his eyes warily searched the surrounding area, looking for some lurking danger. Regardless that the afternoon was sunny and warm, he broke out in a cold sweat, and with trembling hands as he reached out and grabbed hold of Heero's arm and held on for all he was worth.

Not two minutes later Heero leaned towards him and quietly said, "Could you loosen your grip just a bit, Duo?"

"Oh, sorry." He reluctantly dropped his hands to his side. Of course Heero wouldn't want him hanging off of him in broad daylight. He'd probably embarrassed the other man. He was horrified by the overwhelming feelings of insecurity and neediness that seemed to be directing his actions.

Heero draped an arm over his shoulders and gave a comforting squeeze. "I don't mind the contact, Duo. It's just that your grip was a bit painful."

Reassured that he hadn't embarrassed Heero, Duo loosely wrapped his arm around his boyfriend's waist, holding onto a belt loop on his pants. He felt a swell of gratitude grateful for the other man's presence and support as they walked down the familiar street, rounded the corner and turned into the small, local grocery store. A good deal of his uneasiness lessened once they entered the store he typically visited once or twice a week for his groceries and sundry items. Inside the building, he was greeted by a couple of the store's employees and a neighbor or two. He and Heero immediately set about gathering enough food to last a couple of days. Twenty minutes later they each carried two bags full of groceries and were making their way back to the apartment, incident free.

With a sigh of relief, Duo set his two bags down on the kitchen counter. He was relieved they were back home with nothing out of the ordinary having happened. Though he faced one fear, he couldn't quite get over the feeling that someone had been watching him from the moment he'd stepped out of the apartment building's front door, and that he had been moments away from being grabbed from behind and forcibly dragged away. A part of him understood it was ridiculous to think that way, but he just couldn't seem to help himself from reliving certain moments from Friday night's attack.

He pulled a package of beef tri-tip strips out of the bag and then the rest of the groceries, the last item being the steak rub Heero had raved about.

Heero spoke from behind him, where he was unloading his own two bags of foodstuffs. "Why don't you get started on the vegetables and I'll prepare the steak?" Duo turned to accept the head of lettuce and a bag of green beans Heero was holding out to him. He traded the spice rub for the vegetables. "Have any olive oil?"

Five minutes later, the heavily seasoned steak was sizzling in the pan of hot olive oil. Duo was pleased to note that he and Heero worked well in the kitchen together, and every once in a while they playful bumped into each other, which quickly turned into a kiss or grope. Laughter filled the bachelor's kitchen, and Duo would never have believed it was possible to feel so good after the horrifying events of Friday night.

Dinner was delicious, and looking across the small table at the dark haired man smiling back at him, Duo couldn't help but think that Heero was almost too good to be true. But all good things eventually come to an end. It was just after seven that evening when Heero reluctantly announced it was time for him to leave. He listed his laundry, looking at his mail and preparing for the coming week as his reasons for leaving. Duo acknowledged he had similar chores to attend to, but even so he found it a struggle to put on a brave face as he walked Heero to the front door.

"Are you going to be alright?" Heero asked with a look of concern, his fingers lightly running over Duo's jaw.

"I'll be fine," Duo answered with as much confidence as he could muster. "Just call me after you get home so I'll know you got there safely."

"Will do," Heero said with a widening grin, and then he leaned forward for one last kiss.

Duo waved goodbye until Heero disappeared behind the closing elevator doors. He ducked back into his apartment and quickly closed the door, securing it by turning the lock and shutting the bolt home. "Keep busy," he told himself as he pushed away from the front door.

By the time Heero called a half hour later the apartment had been picked up, the bed had been stripped and remade and his clothes were set out for the next morning. Having learned that Heero had gotten home safely, Duo collapsed onto his bed and fell asleep moments after saying goodnight for the second time that night.

***************

News travels fast, especially when it's bad. That's what Duo learned moments after entering the office building that housed DuFrame Designs. From the security guard to the cleaning crew leaving the building after a long night, it seemed everyone had somehow learned he was the man who had survived being attacked by the notorious serial killer. He could only suppose, knowing what a gossip mill his workplace was, that Charise said something to the wrong person. Nearly everyone he passed on his way up to Charise's office expressed their shock and dismay over what had happened, as well was their relief that he was alive and well. Thankfully, no one asked him about the particulars of the attack, which was just as well since Detective Dawson ordered him not to talk about it anyway.

Relieved to find his office empty, he strolled towards his desk, and by the mound of gifts neatly arranged on top of it, he could tell Charise had arrived early that morning. Typical of his employer, whenever he hit a rough patch in his life, she'd come to work with a carefully selected gift or two just for him. She really must have been shaken by his call because there was triple the number of gifts he usually received for his birthday or Christmas.

He sat down at his desk and debated a moment over whether or not he should open the wrapped gifts now or simply clear off his desk and get to work. "Open them now please," Charise urged from the open door of her office.

"How did you know that's what I was thinking?" he asked with a smile aimed at the older woman.

Dressed in a pair of pleated, navy blue pants with a poet's blouse neatly cinched in at the waist by a gold nautical belt, an outfit he recognized as being from last year's collection, the designer walked towards the desk, carefully scrutinizing her assistant. "Sometimes, my dear Duo, I can read you like the back of my hand. But what I don't know is whether or not you're really up to being here today. Are you? Heaven knows if I'd been attacked, I'd be three sheets to the wind or near comatose from a hefty dose of Valium."

Turning on his computer, he said, "I'm fine, Charise. Honest. I had someone stay with me over the weekend and that helped to calm my nerves." And Heero did a hell of a job of distracting him and soothing more than his anxiety.

"Well..." Charise began, looking at her employee in a scrutinizing manner. "You do look surprisingly good, considering everything that happened. But if you suddenly feel the need to go home, for any reason, just let me know and I'll arrange for Deirdre to sit in for you."

"Ah... sounds good. Thanks, boss." The mere thought of Deirdre, an ambitious young woman in advertising, sitting in his chair, a place she openly coveted, was enough to make him stick it out to the end of the day no matter what.

"All right then." Reassured, Charise smiled brightly at him, and there was a gleam in her eyes that spoke of excitement. "Now, open the blue bag first. I hope you like it."

Reaching for the suggested bag, he said, "You've got impeccable taste, Charise. I'm sure I'll love whatever's in here."

He couldn't have been more surprised by the practicality of Charise's gifts. Buried in the blue bag, surrounded by an enormous mass of gold tissue paper, was a can of pepper spray. That was followed by a self-defense video, a whistle that blew loud enough for people in the next building to hear, and a gift certificate for a full body massage. Another package contained a certificate for a pedicure at the salon located on the first floor of the building. "To help you regain your center after such a horrendous ordeal," his employer said with a sincere smile. There were also gift certificates for several restaurants, "They do home deliveries, so you don't have to go out after dark, at least until the serial killer has been caught."

"You didn't need to go to all this trouble, Charise," Duo insisted as he set all the packages in the lower, right-hand drawer of his desk. "I'm fine, really."

"How's Heero?"

That stopped him dead in his tracks and looked at her with surprise. "How did you know?" He and Heero had gone out of their way to be discrete about their budding relationship, so he had to wonder how his employer found out about him seeing her lawyer. He then recalled taking Heero to a co-worker's party when they first started seeing each other. It seemed Charise and her employees knew more about what went on in L.A. then most news agencies.

She gave him a knowing wink. "Women's intuition. Now," she leaned in closer, and there was definitely a devilish gleam in her eyes as she added, "tell me everything."

Charise returned to her office fifteen minutes later, having a basic understanding of her assistant's relationship with her new lawyer and wearing a very pleased smile. Her retreat allowed Duo to begin his work day, and it felt good returning to his normal routine. As usual, there were problems to solve, calls to make and his employer to please.

For the first time in a long while Duo was grateful for the hectic day ahead. Staying busy helped him not to think too much about what had happened on Friday night. His sense of normality, however, lasted only until nine thirty, when the first of many calls from various news agencies began to come in, each wanting a statement from the lone survivor of the serial killer who remained at large.

Heero called around eleven, expressing sympathy that his identity had been hinted at by the press. And though Duo's name hadn't been printed, his place of employment had. Heero then apologized for being unable to make it to lunch, having had a case stall in court. Duo knew all too well how demanding his own job could be, so he graciously accepted the apology and told Heero not to worry about it, that he understood.

After hanging up, he ordered lunch for himself and Charise from the deli down the street, and ten minutes later he was riding down the elevator to pick it up.

He was met outside the office building by six aggressive reporters and three photographers. He wondered how they knew enough about him to identify him as he stepped away from the front door. When pressed by the persistent members of the press to make a statement, he followed Heero's advice by responding adamantly, "No comment."

Moments after breaking free from the disappointed group, Duo heard his name called. He cautiously glanced around, trying to see who it could be, and spied a middle aged man walking in his direction, wearing dark grey corduroy slacks and a pale blue polo shirt beneath a lightweight jacket. He was looking at him expectantly, his smile growing with each passing moment. Duo judged him to be of medium height and he looked physically fit. It took a moment before his eyes widened with recognition. "Uncle Hank?"

Shocked by the unexpected appearance of the man he hadn't seen in well over a decade, Duo stood frozen in place as an older Hank McGuire quickly closed the distance between them, a look of excitement on his tan and weathered face. "Duo. I can't believe it's really you!"

There was a long hesitation after the older man stopped in front of him, and during that brief moment time seemed to stand still as Duo struggled with the various emotions roiling inside him. His feelings for the man in front of him were conflicted and confusing. Most predominant of those feelings, however, were apprehension and wariness. Something inside of him recoiled at the sight of the man he'd once known as his uncle, the husband to his only aunt and father to his cousin Natalie. He just couldn't recall any specific incident in the past that would cause him to feel so guarded toward the man.

With no time to fully analyze why he was feeling this way, he dismissed his initial reaction to Hank as a result from the horrifying attack on Friday night, leaving only a strange sense of anger toward the man in front of him. God, what that hell was that about? Well, his aunt had been a mess for months after his uncle's departure, and the warm, wonderful woman she had been, changed into an angry, bitter person. Yes, this arrested anger he was experiencing was no doubt a run off from the past. Or was his reaction to Hank's sudden appearance, with all these negative feelings, was simply a delayed reaction from Friday's nightmare?

One more glance at the older man, who remained smiling at him, and Duo couldn't help but let all his anger slide away, and in that moment he made a decision; he would give Hank the benefit of a doubt and be cordial to him. If nothing else, the man deserved a chance to explain himself. And he had to admit to being curious about the reasons behind his uncle's disappearance.

Before he could say anything, Hank stepped forward and embraced him, and Duo couldn't help himself from exchanging the manly slaps he received from the taller man before they separated.

"How are you Uncle Hank? I can't believe it's actually you," Duo said as he stepped back see how the years had changed the man. Not too shabby, he thought. His uncle looked different and yet the same. Of course he was older looking than he'd been a decade ago, but the man remained impressively tall and fit and looked rather smart in his more tailored clothing instead of the loose jeans and cotton plaid shirts he'd favored when he was married to his aunt. The former crewcut Hank had worn back then had been allowed to grow a bit longer and was obviously styled by someone other than a strip mall barber. Strands of gray at his temples gave the man a distinguished look. He looked a bit like a respectable college professor.

"I'm good, Duo. And you look..." He stood back a moment to give the younger man a head-to-toe once over before finishing with, "fan-tastic. And that hair of yours, it's positively stunning."

An apprehensive shiver went down Duo's spine. Was he seeing things? If he didn't know better, his uncle had just checked him out? "Ah... you're not too shabby yourself," he replied with his grin still plastered in place. Then more soberly he asked the question that kept tugging at his brain, "How did you know where I worked?"

"I didn't." The man was now beaming. "Jason and I arranged to meet each other here for lunch." He motioned to his companion coming to stand at his side, evidently the Jason he referred to. "He wanted to try out a restaurant across the street. We just finished eating when he commented about an extraordinarily good looking guy coming out of this building. Lo and behold, there you were. I knew you in an instant."

"So our meeting is simply by chance?" What were the odds that they'd meet up like this after so many years had passed, and in L.A. of all places?

"Completely fortuitous. It must be fate that we meet here and now." The older man looked extremely pleased. "All these years I've wondered about you, Duo: how you were, where you lived."

The sound of someone clearing his throat caught Hank's attention. Looking only a little embarrassed, he said, "Duo, let me introduce you to my lover, Jason Kushell."

Stunned, Duo could only stare blankly at the man standing at his uncle's side. "Lover?" he asked as his eyes shifted back to Hank. "You're... you're gay? Since when?"

His uncle chuckled. "Well, I guess I'm not really certain about when, but yes, I am gay, and no longer hiding or apologetic about it."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," the man named Jason said quietly, stepping forward to take Duo's limp hand into his own and giving it a firm shake.

Duo blinked, and for the first time he took a really good look at the man who stood next to his uncle. He was... well, for a polite term, average in appearance. Medium height, thinning brown hair and a round face that bore a wide nose, narrow eyes and thin lips. The best thing Jason had going for him was a muscular physique. "Nice to meet you," Duo responded automatically, trying to form a polite smile while trying to get over the shock about his uncle being gay. You'd think he'd have figured out the man was gay after having lived with him. But then Hank had probably been hiding his sexual orientation while married to his aunt. Another unexplained shudder ran up his spine and a dark feeling stole over him. He dismissed it as resentment over his uncle's treatment of his aunt. How could he marry her, raise a child with her, knowing he was gay?

Jason barely managed a smile in return as he said, "Hank has mentioned you often. We even have a picture of you in our home, but I never thought I'd actually have the chance to meet you."

"A picture of me?"

"I managed to take a few pictures with me when I left. Most of them are of you and Natalie." The mention of his deceased cousin's name palled their little reunion.

After a slight pause, Duo looked at Jason again. "I hope he told you only good things about me and left out what an awkward kid I was back then, all arms, legs and mouth." Duo shifted his gaze back to his uncle, and despite the conversation being light, his smile remained forced and the uncomfortable feeling in his gut remained. He wondered how upset his aunt was going to be after learning of this little reunion. Whenever Hank's name was brought up in conversation, she'd usually said, and rather vehemently, how she hoped never laid eyes on Hank McGuire again. Though she never stated the reason for their divorce, Duo had to wonder if she'd somehow discovered her husband's not-so-little secret, and that discovery that he was gay had ended their marriage.

"Of course I didn't say anything uncomplimentary," Uncle Hank said with a wide grin. "I don't really remember you being awkward, only that you were a wonderful kid. I don't know what Helen and I would have done after Natalie died if you hadn't been there. What a comfort you were to the both of us." A look of sadness flashed across the older man's face. Duo had often seen his aunt wearing that same expression whenever she was reminded of their daughter's sudden death in their home.

Natalie had been four years older than him, but when he'd arrived that the McGuire's home two days after his parents' death, his cousin had gone out of her way to be kind and helped him feel at home and a part of their family. Sixteen was too young for anyone to die, he thought mournfully, especially someone as sweet and lovely as his cousin had been. They never knew if she had been sleep walking or just getting up in the middle of the night to get a drink when she fell down the stairs, breaking her neck in the process.

"Let's not go down that sad road." Hank seemed to be reading his mind today. "This is a happy day, one to celebrate, considering our chance reunion." With his grin slowly returning and a twinkle in his eyes, the older man looked genuinely excited to meet up with him again. "We've already had our lunch, but if you've the time, I'd love to sit down somewhere, buy you something to eat and catch up."

Duo looked at his watch. In spite of his initial reaction to Hank's sudden appearance, he thought it might be nice to catch up with his long-lost uncle, but now was not the time. His boss was waiting for her lunch, and Charise was not a happy camper if she wasn't fed properly. "I'm sorry, Uncle Hank, but I've got to pick up lunch for my boss and return to work. Maybe we can catch up another time."

"Sure, sure," his uncle agreed easily. "Tell you what. Let's exchange phone numbers. We'll find a more convenient time to get together and catch up on each other's lives."

Jason conveniently provided two of his own business cards, of which Hank used the back to write down his cell phone number and then Duo's, when the braided man gave it to him. Handing him the card with his number on it, the older man stated, "It really is good to see you again, Duo. You look great and very successful. Are you happy?"

A couple of months ago Duo's answer might have been much different, but after spending the weekend with Heero, he could answer truthfully, "Yeah, I'm happy."

"Got someone special in your life?"

Duo's smile widened as he imagined Heero in his mind. "Someone very special."

The older man reached out and clasped Duo's upper arm. "I'm glad."

"Thanks," Duo blushed. Then glancing at his watch, he realized that time was passing quickly. "Listen, I'd love to talk more, but I really do need to get going."

"You work in that building?" Hank asked, glancing up at the multi-storied building. "Must be someone important."

"Charise DuFrame. She's a fashion designer."

"Are you a designer?" Hank's boyfriend asked, his face displaying mild interest.

"No, I'm her assistant."

"Then we better let you get back to your job," Hank interjected with a pleasant grin. "It was good to see you again, Duo. Please call."

"I will, Uncle Hank. And soon."

His uncle's boyfriend watched and he and Hank briefly embraced goodbye, and then Duo turned to walk away. He had gone no more than ten feet before Duo l couldn't help looking over his shoulder, glimpsed a look of disapproval flash across Jason's face. What the hell was that about? Had he made a bad first impression, or had his uncle said something that embarrassed the man? With a final goodbye wave, Duo rushed off to get his and Charise's lunch.

******************

Trudging back to his apartment at the end of the day, Duo felt completely wrung out. Work had been hectic and the pesky, invasive reporters who were waiting for him when he exited the building for the last time that day had added to his stress. Three of the sneaky bastards actually made it past security and up to his office. He was even chased down the hall by one of them when he attempted to elude his questions.

Riding up the elevator to his floor, Duo closed his eyes and let out a tired sigh of relief. All he wanted to do that evening was take a hot bath and crawl into bed. Even the thought of eating dinner seemed like too much effort. But before the night was through, he was determined to find enough energy to call Heero and wish him goodnight.

The chime sounded as the two elevator doors parted, and as soon as he exited the elevator, he automatically turned towards his apartment, only to come face to face with Trowa. Other than the serial killer and Quatre, his former boyfriend was one of the last people on Earth he wanted to deal with at the moment.

The taller man reached out to him but Duo managed to sidestep his hand. "Are you alright?" Trowa asked, a look of worry etched on his face. And now that Duo got a good look at the man, he decided that Trowa looked haggard. His eyes were bloodshot and he had dark circles beneath them.

"What are you doing here?"

"I just had to see for myself that you were alright. You are, aren't you? God, Duo, I've had the worst nightmares ever since Dr. Catalonia called."

"I'm fine, as you can see," Duo said, holding his hands out as if to show he had nothing to hide. "Now if you'll excuse me, I've had a very long day."

"Duo!"

He had just turned his back on the other man when Trowa called out his name, but the desperate plea in his voice made him stop. He took a deep breath and let his shoulders slump slight as he asked, "What the hell do you want with me, Trowa?"

There was a long, painful pause before the other man said, "I just want to make things right, to be friends again. I know I hurt you, Duo, and I'll apologize until I'm blue in the face, if that's what you want. I'm sorry if my relatinship with Quatre hurts or offends you, but I'm in love with him. But my love for him doesn't take away the fact that I still care about you, and as your friend I'm concerned about your well being. We were good friends, weren't we? Isn't there any way we could be that again?"

"Let bygones be bygones?" Duo suggested sarcastically. "Do you really think it can be that simple?" Turning around fully now, he leveled an angry glare on his former boyfriend. "You betrayed me, Trowa. You should have broken up with me before you attempted any type of relationship with my shrink. How do you think it felt on my end, suddenly being faced with the realization that you were seeing him, falling in love with him behind my back?"

There was an earnest look on Trowa's face as he replied, "It honestly wasn't like that, Duo. Quatre and I both felt a connection the first time we met in his office. But because I seemed reluctant to talk openly about your problems, he thought a less threatening atmosphere might help me loosen up and feel more comfortable, so he invited me out for coffee. We soon found that we shared a lot of interests and went to see a foreign film together when you were out of town with Charise. It wasn't long after that when we knew that there was something special happening between us, that we were falling in love. I swear, Duo, we didn't go any further with our relationship until I worked up the courage to end things with you. I know I shouldn't have gone out with him without your knowing about it, but I didn't purposely set out to fall in love with Quatre. It just happened, and I was fortunate enough to have him fall in love with me also."

Combing a hand through his auburn hair and looking unsure of himself, Trowa added, "Besides, I honestly don't know if you and I would have made it as a couple even if Quatre hadn't come into the picture. Of course I had a strong physical attraction to you. Any gay man would have to be blind and an idiot not to want to be with you. But even when things were good between us, Duo, there seemed to be something missing in our relationship, and I'm not talking about sex. I've thought about it quite a bit and have come to the conclusion that we lacked a deeper form of intimacy, an inability to understand each other, to communicate. We were great friends, but I don't think we would have been great lovers."

With a frustrated huff, the taller man let his hands drop to his side in a sign of defeat. "I'm sorry. I've never been very good at explaining my feelings."

"And I've never been very good at reading between the lines," Duo confessed, understanding for the first time that this was exactly what Trowa was talking about. There had always been an air of mystery about the other man, and he'd never fully understood him, though he'd always just shrugged it off as Trowa being naturally shy and reticent. They really had lacked the intimacy he spoke of. That fact was even more evident in light of his new relationship with Heero. Even though they had only known each other a short time, he felt closer to Heero than any man he'd ever met. Maybe that was how it was between Trowa and Quatre.

As if sensing the shift in his attitude, Trowa took a cautious step forward, his green eyes once again taking on a beseeching look as he said, "I've missed you, Duo. You are an important person in my life, my best friend. Even when we were trying to be something more, we remained friends and enjoyed each other's company. Is there really no way we can salvage that part of our relationship?"

There was dead silence in the hallway as Duo considered Trowa's question. Could he forgive the other man enough to let him back into his life? They had been the best of friends, and if he were honest with himself, he did miss him, though now with Heero in his life the loss of him and Quatre was much more tolerable. The aching hole in his heart, created by Trowa falling in love with his trusted shrink, wasn't as noticeable as it had been. In fact, Duo was beginning to believe he'd been holding onto the hurt as a type of crutch. Maybe it had been easier to be angry with them than to forgive and forget and get on with his life. Time, it seemed, had helped him to come to that realization, but he was more inclined to believe Heero was the reason for his change of heart. With Heero in his life, what good did it do him to keep beating up on his former boyfriend and shrink? It was definitely a time for change.

"I haven't spent much time on a racquetball court since we stopped playing during our lunch hour. Do you think it's possible to reserve a court for next week?"

A look of relief filled Trowa's eyes at the same time his dazzling smile came to life. "I'll get us a court. Same time Tuesdays and Thursdays?"

Duo found himself smiling at the man and something loosened up in his chest. Making up with Trowa left him feeling incredibly good. "Yeah, that would be great."

After one hesitant moment, Trowa closed the distance between them to embrace him. "Thank you," he whispered against Duo's hair. "I swear you'll never regret giving me another chance at being your friend. I won't blow it this time."

After a moment Trowa dropped his arms and stepped back. "About Quatre..." he began, only to have Duo cut him off.

"Let's take this one step at a time, all right? I promise not to say any derogatory comments about him when we're hanging out together, but I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with him at this point."

Though a brief look of disappointment crosse d his face, Trowa replied, "Fair enough. I'll call you if there's any problem reserving the court, otherwise I'll see you there next Tuesday."

"Goodnight, Trowa."

The other man hesitated, and Duo had the feeling he'd wanted to be invited in so they could talk some more. That wasn't going to happen tonight. Trowa seemed to get his drift and quietly said, "Night, Duo."

No sooner had he stripped off his clothes and pulled on his robe, the phone rang. He smiled after seeing the I.D. on the display, indicating H. Yuy was calling. "Hey, lover. What's up?" he said the moment he had the phone to his ear.

"Take a guess," Heero replied with a teasing chuckle. The sound of which had Duo believing it was the second sexiest sound he'd ever heard.

"Too bad you're on the other side of town."

"Who says I am?"

A smile grew on the braided man's face. "Tell me you're outside my door and I'll make you the happiest man alive."

The barely audible sigh was his answer. "Sorry. I wish I was. Unfortunately, I am still at work. I just wanted to call and tell you I missed you today. Did everything go alright?"

Duo proceeded to tell his boyfriend about the day's events, including his surprising encounter with his long lost uncle and making up with Trowa.

"Your uncle is gay?"

"Apparently," Duo chuckled. "I almost tripped over my dropped jaw when he told me."

"And you never suspected?"

"I was a kid, Heero. Why would I suspect he was anything other than my aunt's husband? I didn't know anything about being gay back then."

"And he just happened to be outside your building today, after what happened this weekend? Don't you find that a bit odd?"

"Odd?" Duo had to think about that for a moment. "Maybe not odd, but definitely an extraordinary coincidence. I tend to think of it as life presenting me with an opportunity after having a rotten experience. You know, some kind of balance in the universe."

"How did he say he found you? By merely looking out a window?" The tone of his voice indicated that Heero was skeptical of the story, but Duo dismissed it as his lawyer side fighting to get out.

"Why wouldn't Ibelieve him, Heero, especially when his boyfriend backed him up?"

"I don't know." He could hear the other man's heavy sigh over the line. "I guess after everything that happened last weekend I'm feeling a bit over protective of you."

Duo grinned, pleased by the thought that Heero wanted to protect him. "I like this side of you, wanting to keep me safe. It's very sexy, you know."

Heero laughed. "I've never heard that one before, but if that's what it takes to keep you, I'll be cutting up your meat and vegetables when we go out to prevent any chance of you choking."

"I wouldn't go that far," Duo laughed, thoroughly enjoying the light banter. Heero was good for him in so many ways. Sitting down on the bed and cradling the phone to his ear he asked, "When can I see you again?"

"As soon as my schedule allows." There was a shuffling of papers before Heero continued. "I'm tied up for most of this week, but I might be able to get away earlier on Friday. Would you like to go out?"

Out. The simple suggestion slammed into Duo unexpectedly, realizing that Heero wanted to go out... into the city. The fear he thought was behind him after last Friday's ordeal came roaring back.

"Duo?"

"I... I can't, Heero. Not to a club."

"No, of course not," Heero rushed to reassure him. "I was thinking dinner and a movie, if you feel up to it."

A knot of fear was forming in his belly again. Why did the idea of going out at night terrify him so? He wanted to be with Heero, to share his life with him, but this unreasonable fear made him want to find a hole and hide in it. "Could we eat in?" He knew he was being a wuss, but he honestly couldn't help it.

"Duo," Heero said gently, as if fearing what he said next was going to offend him. "I know you don't want to hear this, but you might need some professional help in dealing with what happened to you. I can hear the fear in your voice, and believe me, I understand. I'm not going to push you into anything, but you might need to speak with a therapist to help you cope with the helplessness you felt during the attack that has now seeped into your daily life."

The idea of finding and going to another therapist was not appealing. Hadn't Quartre already screwed him over? How could he trust someone else? On the other hand, Dorothy had helped, maybe he could talk to her even though trauma wasn't her field of expertise. "I'll talk to Dorothy, see if she can recommend someone."

"Sounds good," Heero replied, sounding relieved.

They chatted a few more minutes with Heero telling him in vague terms about his day and one particular demanding client. When the conversation ebbed naturally, Duo closed his eyes and said, "I wish you were here."

"Me, too. Are you sure you're okay?" There was real concern in Heero's voice. "I could come over if you really need me to."

Feeling ridiculous at being so uncharacteristically needy, Duo knew he couldn't give in to the temptation. He didn't want to be a clingy, needy boyfriend.

Taking a deep breath he answered, "I'm fine. Just tired. I think I'll eat a bowl of cereal and go to bed. Call me tomorrow?"

"Definitely. Sleep well."

"Be careful on your way home," Duo cautioned, not able to help himself. "Stay off the city streets and be wary of strangers."

"We live in L.A., Duo, virtually everyone in the city is a stranger. But don't worry, I'll keep my eyes open. Don't forget to lock your door."

Duo couldn't help but chuckle. "That's some weird couple's talk we're having. We sound like a couple of paranoid freaks."

"With good reason." Heero replied more soberly. "I better get back to work. I'll call tomorrow. Goodnight, love."

"You know I'm head over heels for you, don't you?"

A deep chuckle came from the other side of the line. "I do, and I feel the same way about you. But right now I'm thinking about this past weekend, and heels over shoulders is a term that comes to mind."

There was a smile in his voice when Duo said, "Keep that in mind for Friday. Goodnight, Heero." His conversation with Heero left him feeling warm and desired, the next best thing to having the man with him in person. Could Friday come fast enough? With the way things were going, he doubted it.

TBC

Author's note: This took forever to get out, sorry about that. I've been living Murphy's Law for the past three weeks, beginning with the diamond falling out of my wedding ring. No, I didn't find it. Ever since then everything that could go wrong has. Here's hoping the coming week turns around and goes a bit smoother. With all the chaos going on here, I hope this part makes sense.


	17. Chapter 17

**The Pretender**  
**Chapter 17**

Tuesday didn't fare much better than the day before. After being confronted by two reporters, one in the elevator and the other just outside his office, Duo called the building's security office to firmly remind them that they were being paid to keep unauthorized intruders from gaining access to the upper floors. The call seemed to be taken seriously, because for the remainder of the week all persons entering the building had to present their ID and verify the reason for their visit, which meant no more unexpected visitors. Not everyone was happy with the tighter security, but it helped to keep the press out on the street where they belonged. Unfortunately, the tighter security measures didn't stop reporters from locating and showing up at his apartment building. And how the hell did they get his phone number?

He left work late on Wednesday, well into the evening, having helped Charise go over some fabric samples that needed to be selected by the next morning for cutting. The designer offered him a ride home, not wanting him to be out alone that late at night, and she adamantly refused take no for an answer. He shouldn't have been surprised when, even at that late hour, they were met by a couple of reporters, waiting at the exit of the underground garage, but he was. At least the dark tinted windows of Charise's pale blue Mercedes SL 550 convertible offered some measure of protection from their prying and cameras. To his delight, the news hounds were completely thwarted in their attempt to corner him or capture a decent picture of the only survivor of the serial killer's victims.

Thankfully, the day, at least up until that point, had been relatively free from confrontations with the press. Unfortunately, his luck looked to be running out when he found himself faced with several doggedly determined reporters stationed at the entrance of his apartment building. He dashed from the safety of Charise's car for the doors, brushing past the four reporters while repeating the same phrase he'd given them since they first discovered his identity; no comment. Hoping not to appear panicked, he forced himself not to break out in a run and walk with measured steps to the elevator doors. He sighed with relief as he stepped off the elevator on his own floor, but his relief was brief and his footsteps faltered when he realized who waiting for him almost in the same exact place he'd faced Trowa Monday night.

Dammit. "What are you doing here, Wufei?"

Wearing a suit and tie, it appeared as if the Chinese man had been on his way home from work before he stopped by.

"I just wanted to see if you were all right?"

Duo was both skeptical and suspicious of his former boyfriend's sudden appearance, not to mention his interest in him. "From your past actions, I'm having a bit of a hard time believing that you would spend even a moment worrying about my welfare."

The Asian shrugged. "We were friends once, weren't we? Just because our sex life was non-existent doesn't mean I'd want anything bad to happen to you."

Duo frowned, not believing the other man for a moment. The last time he'd interacted with Wufei had been a less than stellar event. He remembered very clearly being called a cock-tease. No, not a happy memory at all. He moved forward somewhat warily, unsure of why the other man was there. Looking into the dark, unreadable eyes as he neared Wufei, he cut to the chase.

"How did you know where I lived?" If Wufei could locate him, why not the serial killer?

"I traded an interview with a reporter for your address."

Figures.

"Why don't you try being honest with me, Wu. Why the hell are you here? And don't try the 'I'm your friend' line because I don't believe it for a second."

He watched as the Chinese man scanned his body from head to toe and then back up again. Duo felt as if he was being tried, judged and sentenced by those dark, calculating eyes. With all pretense of friendliness gone Wufei didn't bother to smile as he said, "I understand that you and Heero have become rather close."

"I don't think that's any of your business," Duo huffed. Moving past the other man to unlock his front door. After hearing the click of the bolt pulling back, he then glanced over his shoulder. Wufei stood no less the three feet away, a regular black cloud hanging in the hallway.

Narrowing his eyes, Wufei continued, his tone less than friendly. "Don't think I didn't see you running away from us at the club the other night. You're up to your same old tricks, aren't you? Take my advice, Duo, you don't stand a chance with Heero, so you might as well throw in the towel now and save yourself a lot of embarrassment."

Unable to believe what he was hearing, or that Wufei had the balls to talk to him like this, he rounded on the man. "Are you actually warning me away from Heero?"

"He's out of your league. I know what your problems are, Duo, and believe me, I know first hand that Heero is a very sexual person. You don't have what it takes to hold onto a guy like him for more than a couple of weeks, or until he tires of your cock-teasing act."

Flabbergasted and becoming angrier with each passing moment, Duo looked the sloe-eyed man, wondering what he ever saw in him. "You have never been more of a jack ass than you are right now, Wufei. Again, my relationship with Heero is none of your damn business. Now go shit in somebody else's hallway and leave me the hell alone."

He was stopped from opening his door when Wufei grabbed his wrist and held it tightly. "I'm warning you, Maxwell, break things off with Yuy now and I won't tell him about your not-so-little problem. Heero and I are good together, and I'm not about to lose him, even temporarily, to someone like you."

Moving both from instinct and anger, Duo closed his free hand into a fist. He wasn't much of a fighter, but the DVD Charise had given him on defense tactics was definitely going to be tested tonight. Leaning into the motion, he flung his arm low and forward, catching Wufei in an unguarded moment, hitting the source of his pride and nasty attitude dead on. His restrained wrist was immediately freed as Wufei bent over, making a wheezing sound as if he'd been hit in the lungs instead of his cock and balls. Duo quickly pushed his door open and stepped inside. Feeling not even one speck of pity for the other man he turned back to him and said, "Be a man, Wufei. Talk to Heero about this obsession you have with him. I'll leave it up to him to decide which one of us he'd rather have."

A flushed face, grimacing with pain, lifted slowly, and angry eyes met his own. Through gritted teeth, Wufei hissed out, "The point, you bastard, is that Heero can "have" me any time or place that he wants. You, on the other hand," he wheezed, "can't put out. He'll find that out sooner or later, and then you'll be left out in the cold."

"Ancient history, Wu. I'd get your facts straight before you start a pissing contest. Now get the hell out of here before I call the police." With that said, Duo slammed the door on the man still gripping his aching crotch.

Through the closed door he heard, "You'll rue the day you crossed me, Maxwell. Heero will come running back to me once his infatuation with you wanes."

"Once an ass, always an ass," the braided man mumbled, shrugging off the idle threat and feeling strangely satisfied that he'd come out on top in the unexpected encounter. He debated only a moment whether or not to tell Heero about the altercation with Wufei and decided not to. He'd let Wufei approach Heero and broach the subject of him being a cock-tease. He smiled just thinking about Heero's response, and then Wufei's reaction to the news that they were having sex. Oh to be a fly on the wall during that conversation.

By Friday afternoon the media's attention had turned to another story more newsworthy. A famous Hollywood actor had been involved in a hit and run accident on Sunset Boulevard the night before. It was a story that would fill the headlines for days, much to Duo's relief.

His phone rang two minutes after he walked through the door of his apartment at the end of the day. Grinning with the anticipation of speaking with Heero, he didn't bother checking the caller I.D. on the screen before answering.

"Duo?"

It took a moment for him to recognize the voice on the other side of the line and then to hide his disappointment that it wasn't Heero. "Hi, Uncle Hank."

"I hope it's all right that I called you at home. "

"Ah, sure. It's okay," he replied while taking the phone with him to the sofa. Sitting down he asked, "So what's up?"

"I was wondering if you would like to join Jason and I for dinner tomorrow evening. It would give us a chance to catch up."

"Sounds good, but I'm not sure what my boyfriend had planned for the weekend. He's supposed to call any moment now, so maybe I could get back to you after we have a chance to talk."

"Boyfriend, huh?" An amused chuckle sounded from the other end of the line. "Somehow I knew that you were gay."

Duo was about to ask when he'd come to the conclusion that he was gay, but his uncle continued before he could form the question.

"You're certainly welcome to bring him along. I'd like to meet the guy who makes my favorite nephew happy."

The beep in his ear indicated that a call was coming in. "There's my call waiting. I'll bet that's Heero on the other line. Let me get back to you in a little while."

"No rush," Hank said with a chuckle. "Enjoy your conversation and ring back anytime tonight. Jason is out bowling this evening so I'm on my own. Think I'll stay in and watch a movie."

"Bye, Uncle Hank."

"Talk to you later," the older man said before his end of the line clicked off.

Duo immediately hit the button that would take him to the other line. "Heero?"

"I can't tell you how nice it is to hear your voice," Heero said, sounding tired.

"Long week?" He knew Heero had worked every evening on a case involving the CFO from a major airline company, charged with fraud and embezzlement. His job was to prove not only the man's innocence, but that he was set up by one of the board of directors to take the fall for some bad decisions.

"The longest, but I think I've made some headway. The private detective I hired came up with some very compelling information."

"So does that mean you're going to be able to come over tonight?"

"I think I can break away from here in about an hour, but I have to warn you I'm wiped out. I might not be the best company this evening."

"I don't care, I just want to see you. How soon can you get here?"

"If I pick up dinner along the way, I can be there in about an hour and a half."

"I could have something delivered and save you the trip," Duo suggested.

"Sounds good, but nothing too spicy. My stomach's been in knots all week."

"The case you're working on is that demanding?"

"It's not just the case I'm anxious about. I've been worried about you all week. I need to see you, Duo, to be with you."

"I need you, too," Duo said with a sigh. "So get your handsome self over here as fast as you can. I'll be waiting."

"I'll hurry."

It took Duo ten minutes to make up his mind about what to order for dinner. After some deliberation, he chose the closest restaurant with a delivery service and went from there. Chinese food with lots of vegetables, some stir-fry beef and chicken. He stayed away from the spicier items, per Heero's request. With that task accomplished, he spent the rest of the hour freshening up, including a quick shower, a shave and brushing his teeth. Even though Heero said he was tired, he was sure they'd be getting up close and personal in one way or another.

The phone rang fifteen minutes before Heero was due to arrive. Duo fully expected it to be the doorman announcing that dinner had been delivered. Much to his surprise, it was Heero on the line, saying he was on his way up.

Duo met him at the elevator and dragged the weary, rumpled but gorgeous man down the hall and into his apartment. The moment the door closed he was in Heero's arms, reacquainting himself with his lips, caressing his back with one hand while the other was messing up the dark brown locks. Heero fell back against the front door, happily letting Duo have his way with him, grateful for the enthusiastic welcome after a long and tiring week.

When the braided man finally pulled back, his eyes were shining with happiness. "I missed you."

"I can tell," Heero replied with a tired grin, leaning forward to taste that tempting mouth briefly before asking, "Is dinner here? I'm starved."

"Any minute now." Taking Heero's hand, he led him to the sofa and urged the man to sit. Heero slumped down wearily but quickly adjusted himself as Duo sat on his lap and threw his arms around his neck.

"Did I tell you just how much I've missed you?" Duo purred as he closed the distance between them and began to nibble on his boyfriend's ear.

"Yes, I think you did," Heero mumbled, his eyes closing as his senses became overwhelmed by the scent of the other man and the lips teasing his ear. "But you can tell me again."

"Better yet, let me show you," Duo said just before he captured Heero's lips and kissed the lawyer with all the passion he could muster. Once he had the other man thoroughly engaged, he released his mouth to slowly move south, kissing, sucking and nibbling on his neck while loosening the designer tie and unbuttoning the front of his white shirt. He pushed the cotton material away and was disappointed to find a T-shirt barring his way to the wonderful chest. Disappointed, but not wanting to waste precious time, he recaptured Heero's mouth while feeling his way down to his belt and unfastening it, giving himself better access to the button and zipper of the dress pants.

Slowly easing himself off of Heero's lap, he had to release those wonderful lips that were becoming an essential part of his happiness, and parted the relaxed man's knees to slide down between them.

"God, Duo," Heero sighed, his head falling back to rest on the high part of the sofa.

The braided man tugged at the waist of Heero's pants, and to his immense pleasure, his lover lifted his hips so that he could slide both garments down and over his thighs. It took only a moment more before they were tossed over Duo's shoulder. With a grin of anticipation, Duo leaned forward, determined to draw every sexy sound imaginable out of Heero before he was done.

________________

The delivery boy was several minutes late in delivering the Chinese meal to one of his favorite customers. Mr. Maxwell was a pretty cool guy, the seventeen year old boy thought as he approached the familiar. He was also a regular customer and a great tipper. He stopped in front of the designated door and just as he was about to knock, the sound of a man moaning loudly was heard. The tall and lanky teen pressed his ear to the door, wondering if Mr. Maxwell was in pain, and if so, whether or not he might need some kind of help.

"Oh, hell yeah, Duo," the voice moaned. Then rising in volume the man exclaimed, "Oh.. Ah. I... I'm... almost. That's it. Ahh!"

The teenager backed away from the door, a shocked expression on his burning face. That was definitely not Mr. Maxwell, and it sure didn't sound like the man was in pain. He looked down at the two white bags in his left hand and then up at the door again. What the hell was he going to do? He looked at his watch and counted off two minutes before he approached the door again. Taking in a deep breath and squaring his shoulder with resolve, he raised his hand and knocked soundly on the flat surface. "Delivery," he called out.

There were sounds of fumbling on the other side of the door, and after a brief delay it was flung open and the face of his favorite customer was smiling at him.

"Hi, Jim. Running a bit late tonight?" Though he sounded at ease, the delivery boy couldn't help but notice the slight flush on the long-haired man's cheeks.

"Ah... yeah. There's a lot of deliveries on Fridays," the young man said, realizing his face was heating up once more.

A look of concern crossed his customer's face. "Are you okay? You look kind of flushed?"

"Ah... Like I said, I've been running all over the place tonight." Then holding out the two bags he stated, "That will be twenty three, ninety-five."

"Let me get my wallet."

"Here."

Jim looked over the braided man's shoulder to see a dark haired, good looking guy with his shirt open and tie hanging like a noose around his neck hand a couple of bills over. The delivery boy's face felt like a burning torch after realizing this was the person he'd heard through the door, obviously having sex with Mr. Maxwell.

With a grin, the braided man accepted the bills and handed them to the delivery boy. "There you go, and a nice tip included."

Jim handed over the bags of food. "Thanks, Mr. Maxwell."

"Thanks for delivering. See you in a week or two."

"Yeah, sure," Jim mumbled as he turned on his heel and dashed back towards the elevator.

"Slow down, buddy," his customer called after him. "Life's short enough without running through it."

With a wave of his hand, Jim bid his customer a final farewell. Still feeling embarrassed, he could hardly wait to tell the guys back at the restaurant about what he'd overheard and seen at Mr. Maxwell's door. He'd definitely won the long-standing bet that the long haired man was gay.

***************

Moments after finishing their meal, Heero was ushered towards Duo's bedroom. He made a quick detour to the bathroom to refresh himself while Duo turned down the covers. The moment he stepped into the bedroom, he was promptly undressed by his long-haired lover. He was bone weary after the week he'd been through and honestly didn't think he was up to making love to his eager boyfriend. After being tucked under the covers, Duo excused himself to use the bathroom and came out five minutes later wearing only his boxers and button-down shirt, which was open, offering a teasing glimpse of his lovely chest and flat stomach.

Moving to stand at the end of the bed, Duo had his full attention. With a teasing smile on his lips he slowly peeled his shirt off his shoulders and let it drop to the floor. Unwilling to miss even a second of the show being put on for his benefit, Heero hesitated to so much as blink as those hands that had proven to be more than talented slipped under the waistband of the boxer briefs and began the erotic removal of the garment. Once they had joined the shirt on the floor, Duo straightened, his trim and lovely body on full display. Pulling his braid over his shoulder, Duo ran his hand down the length of it before reaching the tip, where he deftly removed the elastic that bound the thick weave together.

Heero didn't know if he'd ever seen anything as erotic as Duo, unabashedly naked and combing his fingers through his long tresses. He continued with the task until the three foot length of hair covered him like a male version of Lady Godiva. All thoughts of sleep and being tired had evaporated, especially when his lover began crawling on the mattress, on hands and knees, from the bottom of the bed, wearing nothing but a seductive grin. When at last they were face to face, Duo lowered his head and captured his lips completely. From that moment on Heero was like putty in the other man's hands, willing to do whatever was necessary to please his lover.

Half an hour later the two men lay entwined on the mattress, the blankets pulled over their cooling bodies. With his eyes closed and a contented yet weary smile on his face, Heero held the long-haired man against his chest. "Damn, that was nothing short of a dream come true. You, my lover, have beguiled me." He chuckled, feeling relaxed and well loved. This was definitely a perfect end to a very hectic week.

"What's so funny?" Duo asked in a sleepy voice.

"Nothing, love. Go to sleep."

"No. Tell me. I want to know all your deep thoughts."

Heero smiled. "It's been years since I believed that there might be someone in the world who was meant just for me. Like I told you before, I was a bit of a wild teenager, looking for love but mistaking sex for that elusive emotion. My search for the perfect mate led me through countless boys and then men, and each failed relationship chipped away at my belief of a soul mate until I turned cynical. To tell the truth, I've never felt the need to apologize for all the men I've had sex with, but with you here, lying in my arms and never having been with another man, makes me wish I had a cleaner slate."

"None of it matters, now that we're together," Duo replied quietly.

After several moments passed in quiet contentedness, the need for sleep quickly overcame him. With a yawn, he whispered in a sleepy voice, "I'm sorry. I really have to go to sleep. Goodnight, love."

Duo leaned up to kiss his cheek. "Sleep well," he replied, a smile on his face as he settled himself at Heero's side.

Heero let his mind relax along with his body, and within moments he was sound asleep. Duo quickly followed.

Unfortunately, the worries of the week carried themselves into Heero's normal sleeping pattern. Despite his weariness, he woke promptly at 5 a.m. Try as he might, he couldn't go back to sleep despite being comfortable and warm with Duo's naked body pressed up against him. He contemplated waking the other man to a repeat performance of the night before, but he thought Duo would probably appreciate an extra hour or two of sleep. He eased himself out of his lover's embrace and padded silently to the bathroom, where he closed the door as quietly as possible before turning on the light and starting the shower.

Duo woke slowly, gently urged to wakefulness by the hand gently stroking his head. "Hey, sleepyhead." Heero's voice, soft as it was, cut through the fog of lingering sleep, bringing a smile to his face.

"Morning."

The smell of coffee and bacon caught his interest and both eyes blinked open. Sure enough, Heero was sitting on the bed and a tray of food was on the bedside table. Duo's smile faded slightly when he realized that Heero was dressed in his work clothes, minus the tie and jacket. "How long have you been up?"

"Two hours."

"And you didn't wake me?" Duo pulled himself into a sitting position with something close to a pout on his face.

Heero, unable to resist, leaned forward to brush his lips across Duo's. Sleep mussed was definitely a great look on the other man. "I didn't want to disturb your sleep, especially since I need to head back to the office."

Duo put his hand behind his head, keeping him from pulling back. "You can't stay a while longer?"

It was a tempting offer, but with a defeated sigh Heero shook his head and explained, "I'm swamped at the office. I really do have to go, but I wanted to at least have breakfast with you."

It was hard not to be disappointed, but Duo managed a pleased expression as he looked at the tray. "So what have you got?"

They fed each other off the tray, teasing and flirting, yet when the tray was empty, Heero reluctantly looked at his watch, then stood to take the tray back to the kitchen. "Leave it. I'll take care of the dishes later," Duo said, moving to climb out of the bed. "I'll see you to the door."

After slipping on a clean pair of boxers, the long-haired man took Heero's hand into his own and led him to the front of his apartment. "I almost forgot," Duo said as they approached the door. "My uncle invited me to dinner tonight and you're invited. Would you like to come?"

"I don't know," he hedged, thinking about everything he needed to do that day. "What time?"

"He didn't say," Duo replied, tugging on the front of Heero's shirt. With a grin he looked up from beneath the fringe of hair over his forehead and added, "I was supposed to call him back last night, but I guess I was a bit too distracted."

Heero put his fingertips under Duo's chin, raising it up to capture his smiling lips in a satisfying kiss. When he pulled back he said, "Text me the time and place and I'll let you know if I can make it."

They parted reluctantly, each man hoping for a chance to see each other again before the weekend was over.

TBC

Notes: Thanks again to those who left such nice comments, and of course, to Louise also. I rushed to get this out as I'm leaving town tomorrow to spend Easter with my parents. Have a great weekend everyone.


	18. Chapter 18

**The Pretender**

Chapter 18

The next morning, the phone rang around ten. Duo wasn't surprised to find his uncle on the other side of the line. "Sorry, Uncle Hank. I meant to call back last night but Heero and I... well, we got distracted."

The knowing laugh on the other side of the line triggered a familiar memory and a smile. Uncle Hank always had a distinctive, contagious laugh. "I understand," the older man replied. "If I had a young, attractive man like you as my boyfriend, I'd probably be 'distracted' all the time."

"I hope Jason didn't hear you say that. I don't want him getting jealous," Duo teased back, though to be honest, having his uncle insinuate he found him attractive was kind of creepy.

"No chance of that happening," Hank replied with a chuckle. "Jason and I are both very independent people, which is why we fit very well together. Our days of screwing any guy showing an interest are behind us."

"Do you live together?"

"No. He's had his apartment for a long time and the rent is cheaper than it would be if he split the cost of my house. He likes the location, knows his neighbors and so he's reluctant to make a change."

"You could move in with him, couldn't you?"

The older man shrugged. "His place is too small. Besides, I like our arrangement. We get together at his place or mine a couple of times a week, then go about our lives. Me, I like being able to come home and watch what I want on T.V. and eat what I like and go to bed when I feel like it. We're both happy with how things are going. How about you and your boyfriend? Are you living together?"

"Not yet," Duo answered. "But I hope to. Every moment we spend together convinces me that Heero's the one for me, and I want to be with him as often as our jobs allow."

"Sounds like love."

Duo couldn't help smiling as he answered. "It is, at least for me."

"And for him?"

"I think he loves me too. He's been wonderful, Uncle Hank. He goes out of his way to help and be there for me. Like last night, he came to my place to spend time with me even though he was exhausted from being loaded down with work at his office all week." Duo signed, just thinking about his man. "I've always dreamed of having a relationship like this, Uncle Hank, but not even in my wildest dreams could I have come up with someone as perfect as Heero. And considering the unusual way we met, it seems like our being together more like an act of fate."

"I'm glad, Duo. After the death of your parents, I'd hoped you'd be able to move past the loss and have a happy life. Looks like you've done well, son."

"Thanks," Duo replied and then more soberly said, "About tonight, I'm not sure if Heero can make it or not. After we figure out a time and place, I'll text him and he'll let me know if he can get away from the office."

"Would you like to come down here to my place for dinner? I live in Buena Park, which is about an hour away from where you work, that is if the freeway isn't its usual mess. Or, we could meet somewhere in between if you'd prefer, a restaurant of your choice."

Duo hesitated to answer, thinking about his options. If he could avoid it, he really didn't want to be out late.

"How about seven?"

"Any chance we can make it earlier? I really don't want to be out late, and I think it might be better if we meet somewhere in the middle, to save time."

"Ah, sure." There was a pause before Hank said, "Jason and I can meet you at six. Is that good?"

After describing where he lived, Duo suggested a family restaurant guaranteed to be full of people, set just off the freeway and half way between his apartment and Buena Park. "I'll meet you there at six," Duo agreed.

When the call ended, he pulled out his cell phone and texted the information to Heero. Three hours later his handsome lawyer called to say he didn't see how he could leave the office until eight and asked if Duo wanted him to come over to his apartment after he finished working?

Disappointed that Heero wasn't going to meet them for dinner, Duo wondered if it was even possible to return to his place by eight. Well, no matter how much he and his uncle wanted to catch up, getting home in time to spend the rest of the evening with Heero would definitely be a great excuse for him not to linger at the restaurant any longer than necessary. With that legitimate excuse he'd avoid getting home late and sidestep telling either his uncle or Heero that he was scared shit-less at the thought of being out at night.

With the promise of Heero coming over, Duo spent the afternoon cleaning up his apartment and doing laundry, including washing and drying the sheets on his bed. After everything was done to his satisfaction, he had about thirty minutes to get dressed and get out the front door for the drive to meet his uncle.

Traffic seemed heavier than usual as he navigated the Los Angeles freeways, and he checked his watch every few minutes to confirm that he was going to be late. He arrived at the pre-determined restaurant seven minutes late. Not too bad, he supposed, but he liked being punctual. He was met at the door by his uncle, who greeted him with a wide grin and a pat on his back. They exchanged pleasantries before his Hank took his elbow and directed Duo further into the restaurant.

"Jason is holding the table for us," the older man explained over his shoulder. "I hope you don't mind, but I ordered us some drinks and an appetizer."

"No, that's fine. Sorry I'm late. Traffic," he explained. The older man gave him a look of understanding. In L.A., clogged freeways were a way of life and always a plausible explanation for tardiness.

As they approached one of the back tables, Jason stood from his seat and in a reserved, somewhat formal manner, he extended his hand. "Good to see you again, Duo."

"Likewise," Duo replied, smiling at the other man while still trying to comprehend that this man was actually his uncle's lover.

A menu was presented and within five minutes all three men had ordered their meal. Over dinner and drinks, Duo and his uncle chatted with growing ease as the minutes ticked by and memories of the past were recalled. Jason was often brought into the conversation by his uncle, but he politely let the two men catch up after having been separated for over a decade. Several times Duo felt the quiet man's gaze on him, but when he turned to Jason, the man averted his eyes. He thought Jason was rather odd.

An hour passed quickly, and because he was enjoying himself, Duo felt a small bit of reluctance at ending the evening at the seven thirty mark. But Heero was going to be back at his apartment in a half hour, and that was incentive enough for him to make his excuses and high-tail it out of there.

Hank said he understood, and the two older men graciously offered to walk him out to his car before saying good night. The evening was balmy, with a gentle breeze coming from the west, off the Pacific Ocean. Pulling the keys from the pocket of his pants, Duo approached his silver BMW and turned to say something to his uncle when he noticed Jason was frowning at his car.

"Your tires are flat," the man calmly announced.

Duo turned to study his tires and sure enough, his front and rear tires were flat. "Shit." Quickly walking around the other side of the car, he discovered that all four tires had been flattened. He knelt down to inspect the tread of his right front tire. From the other side of the car he heard a confirmation of his suspicions from Jason. "They've been slashed." His disbelief was almost immediately replaced by anger, which quickly morphed into fear.

"Who the hell would do this?" Hank asked.

Duo feared there was only one person who would benefit from him being stranded this far from the safety of his home.

Rising on shaky legs he looked to his uncle, and the fear he felt must have been evident on his face because the older man quickly came round the front of the car and put his arm around his shoulders. "It's alright, Duo. I'm here. Nothing's going to happen to you."

Eyes wide with fear, Duo muttered, "He's found me."

"Who?"

Folding his arms over his chest, Duo stared at the ruined tires, unwilling or perhaps unable to answer.

Hank, hoping to reassure his nephew, said, "It's got to be some punk kids who spied a great looking car and decided to do some mischief. I'm certain this is a random act."

"Punk kids don't usually hit just one car," Jason said as he circled Duo's car, studying the vehicles around them. He came back a few moments later. "There's no damage to any other cars that I can see," he reported.

Putting a hand on Duo's shoulder, Hank asked, "What do you want to do, Duo? I think we should call the police"

Shaken, the braided man could only think of one place he wanted to be. "I want to go home."

"I understand," Hank replied. "But I really do think the police should be called."

"Why don't we drive Duo home," Jason suggested. "We can call the police and a tow truck while en route."

While Hank seemed to be thinking over that Duo said, "Please, Uncle Hank. I just want to go home. I'll be safe there and Heero said he'd drop by around eight."

The white sedan that carried him back to his apartment belonged to Jason, though Duo was so distracted he couldn't have said what kind of car it was nor anything about the interior. As they drove northward, Hank called a tow truck company to pick up his car and deliver it to the nearest tire repair company. He was given the address of the repair shop and hastily scribbled it down on the back of a receipt he found in the glove compartment. Then, after giving his uncle the contact number for Detective Dawson, the older man called L.A.'s police department to report what had happened. Duo mind was in turmoil from the possibility of being stalked by the notorious killer. The slashing of his tires had to be a message, alerting him to the fact that he was being watched. Distracted as he was, he listened only with half an ear to his uncle's conversation with the police detective. Even though everyone else seemed to know he had been the lone survivor of the serial killer, it appeared his uncle and Jason remained ignorant of that fact. From what he overheard of the phone conversation, Detective Dawson didn't say anything that gave away any information.

Despite his uncle's attempts to draw him into conversation during the drive home, Duo remained closed down and uncommunicative as he struggled to push aside the terror ballooning within him by concentrating on his one source of comfort: Heero. His lover would know what to do, how to handle the situation.

Eventually, he was forced to speak up in order to direct Jason into taking the correct exit off the freeway to West Hollywood. He continued giving him directions to his apartment building and within a few minutes the car pulled up in front of the complex.

"Can we walk you in?"

Duo turned to his uncle and nodded, "That would be great. Thanks." He didn't want to be left alone, not even for a moment. The three men entered the lobby together and took the elevator up to Duo's floor. When the elevator doors parted, Duo zeroed in on the man leaning against the wall to the left of his apartment's entrance, a large white bag in his hand. Breaking away from the other two men, he made a beeline for Heero, who straightened from the wall the moment he saw his lover step out of the elevator. The lawyer stepped away from the wall and watched Duo rush towards him, a growing look of alarm growing on his face as he realized by his lover's manner that something was wrong.

"Duo, what's the...?"

Moving quickly into Heero's embrace, Duo wrapped his arms around his lover and held on for all he was worth and, damn, his entire body seemed to be shaking.

"I take it you're Heero?" Hank asked as he much more clamly approached the two, meeting Heero's troubled gaze.

With a stiff nod Heero replied, "You must be Duo's uncle."

"Hank McGuire." Then turning to include the man by his side he added, "And this is my boyfriend, Jason Kushell. I'm sorry we couldn't have met under better circumstances."

Holding his lover's body close, Heero could feel him trembling and became increasingly concerned over what could have caused this sudden upset. He looked to the older men for an answer. "What the hell happened tonight?"

Much to his embarrassment, Duo's voice wavered as he answered for them, "He found me." Damnit, he sounded pathetic, and he hated the thought of losing face in front of the three men, especially Heero.

It took the lawyer only a moment to figure out what Duo was talking about. "You mean the serial killer?"

"The serial killer?" Hank asked. "Are you talking about the one in L.A?" Looking doubtful he continued. "That's a bit farfetched, don't you think?" When neither Heero or Duo answered, he addressed Heero, intending to explain why his nephew was so upset. "We had dinner together, then came out of the restaurant to find all four tires on Duo's car had been slashed."

Heero visibly stiffened, then looking at the two men he nodded towards the front door. "Why don't we take this inside so we don't alarm the neighbors. Do you have your keys, Duo?"

With hands that wouldn't stop trembling, Duo managed to pull his keys out of the pocket of his jacket and handed them to Heero. Once the four men were inside the room, Heero made a show of securing the two locks on the front door. He then led Duo by the hand into the living room, the two older men following behind.

With eyes displaying his anxiety, Duo glanced nervously around his apartment, looking for any sign that his greatest fear was about to be realized. "What if he followed us? What if he knows where I live?"

"It's a long way from the restaurant to here, Duo," his uncle answered calmly. "It would be almost impossible for anyone to have followed us through the traffic on three L.A. freeways, especially if they didn't know where we were going."

"Then how the hell did he find me at the restaurant?" He turned to Heero and said, "The only thing that makes sense is that he followed me from here when I left. If Wufei could get my address from the press, then why couldn't someone else?" There was definitely a hint of panic in his voice, but try as he might it was getting harder to remain calm and rational in the face of all that had happened. He moved away from the other three, wrapping his arms around himself as he tried to regroup his battered nerves.

"Duo," Heero began, his tone suggesting he was going to try to reason with him. "I'm sure this is just a random act of mischief by some local kids. If you hadn't been attacked last weekend, you would think the same. It was just bad luck, not the killer."

"What are you talking about?" Hank asked. He and Jason both were clearly perplexed by their conversation. "Duo?"

Heero turned and briefly explained to the two men what had happened the weekend before. Hank swore while Jason simply shook his head and looked down at his shoes, obviously either uncomfortable or not knowing what to say in this situation.

"Listen, Heero," Duo began, feeling on the verge of losing it, "you don't know that it wasn't the killer who slashed my tires. What if it was him? What am I supposed to do now if he knows where I live?"

Stepping forward and firmly gripping both of Duo's shoulders, Heero looked directly into his lover's eyes as he firmly declared, "You'll come live with me. We'll go to work and do everything else together. I'll keep you safe, Duo. No one is going to hurt you, I promise."

The blue-violet eyes suddenly watered, and Duo's shoulders slumped. "Dammit, I hate feeling like this. I swear I'm not usually this fragile. What the hell is the matter with me?"

"You were attacked only a week ago and could have been killed. No one can just walk away from something like that emotionally unscathed. You've been doing well, under the circumstances, but there's bound to be some setbacks. What happened tonight has you feeling vulnerable and victimized again. But you'll overcome this, we both will."

Duo stepped forward and melted into his lover's embrace. Wrapping his arms around Heero's waist, he held on tightly, trying to force himself to calm down. After a long, drawn-out moment, he remembered they had an audience and reluctantly took a step back. Embarrassed by having put on a show, he looked over Heero's shoulder to see Jason and his uncle standing next to each other. Both men were discretely looking elsewhere, trying to give he and Heero a moment to themselves while carrying on a whispered conversation of their own.

"I'm sorry, Uncle Hank. This isn't how I envisioned our get together tonight."

The older man's smile was meant to be comforting as he said, "You've nothing to apologize for. I'm just sorry about what you've gone through and now for what happened tonight. Listen, Jason and I were just talking, and if you'd feel safer, you could come and stay with either one of us, though I live closer to your work than he does. The downside to that is that your commute to work would be longer than you're used to, but the upside is that no one would know where you were."

Duo stepped back from Heero, having regained some of his composure, but stayed close enough for his boyfriend to hold him against his side, an arm draped over his shoulders as he faced the two older men. "I appreciate the offer, but Heero's invitation makes more sense. He lives closer to the city and he can look out for me. I don't really want to be alone right now."

"We understand," Jason said, uncharacteristically firm, his eyes shifting momentarily to Hank.

"But if you need anything, you know you can call on us, right?" Hank inserted after a curious glance at his partner.

"Thanks, and I really appreciate the offer." Duo managed a faint smile, though he suddenly felt weary to the bone form the adrenaline rush.

"If you're moving in with Heero tonight, perhaps we can help you pack."

"No, that's okay. I'm just going to pack up enough clothes to last the week. By then I'm sure Heero will be ready to boot me out of his apartment."

"Don't count on it," his boyfriend replied with a crooked smile and a squeeze of his shoulder.

Duo looked into Heero's deep blue eyes, trying to read the meaning behind his words. Was the invitation to stay at his place made solely out of necessity or something more? Even though Duo hadn't given much thought to living with Heero, the idea warmed his troubled heart. Heaven only knew how hard he'd fallen for the lawyer; he was pretty damn sure he'd lost his heart to the man. But were they ready to take the giant step of living together? He didn't want Heero to feel obligated in living together, or inviting him just to soothe his anxiety and fear. No, he needed Heero to want him there because he loved him. But that was something to be dealt with in the future, because at the moment he was too shaken up by the evening's events to turn down the offer to stay Heero's place no matter what his motives were. Still, he promised himself that if he saw any tension growing between them over the course of the week, he'd know it was too soon for them to live together and he'd make other arrangements.

"Well then, I guess we should be heading out," Jason said with a look at his lover that said, come on, let's go.

Duo met the older man's gaze with a relieved smile. "Thanks, both of you, for bringing me home. I appreciate all you've done for me tonight." Leaning forward, but not away from Heero's t ouch, he offered his hand to his uncle and then to Jason. "It was good catching up with you again. I'm just sorry the evening ended badly."

"Don't worry about it," Jason said with a small smile as he released Duo's hand. "When you live in this city you just kind of expect some shit to happen once in a while, but you've had more than yourr share during the past week. Let's hope your run of bad luck is behind you now."

Uncle Hank unexpectedly stepped forward and embraced his nephew, but when he held on just a little too long, Duo pushed him away and stepped back, reaching out for Heero's hand.

"You take care, kiddo. I'm trusting Heero to watch your back. Call me if you need anything."

"Ah... will do, Uncle Hank. Again, I'm sorry our evening was ruined. We'll try it again sometime. Maybe after the killer's been caught."

"Oh, almost forgot." Hank pulled a slip of paper out of the pocket of his light jacket and handed it to Heero. "Here's the name and address of the business where Duo's car was towed. You should give them a call in the morning. The detective I spoke to said he'd take a look at the car tonight, check it for fingerprints. Now that I know what's been going on, his comments make more sense."

Heero looked at the name of the business, noting the neat, block-style penmanship. "Thanks," he replied. "I'll take care of it tomorrow."

After saying goodbye at the door, they turned and left. Heero didn't wait to see them enter the elevator, instead he shut and locked the front door once again then turned to his boyfriend. "Let's get you packed and back to my place."

"Heero?" Duo sounded tentative as he spoke up. "You don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"Do what?" Stepping forward, he slipped his arms around Duo's waist and waited for the braided man to lift his head. He then placed a soft, brief kiss on his forehead, and then one on both eyelids as they closed.

"It's probably too soon for us to live together," was all the Duo could manage as Heero slowly stole his breath away with his gentleness.

"It might be early in our relationship, but I want you to be safe."

"I do feel safe when I'm with you," he confessed, looking up and into Heero's deep blue eyes.

"So answer me, do you want to live with me?"

There was a long pause before Duo opened his eyes Heero looking back at him. "For a week?"

Heero grinned, "To begin with, and maybe permanently, if we're as compatible living together as we are in other areas of our relationship."

"I..." Duo paused, unsure about whether or not he should say what was in his heart. If he confessed his feelings, Heero might turn and run if he knew he'd become the center of his universe. He searched the other man's eyes for truthfulness after asking, "Are you sure?"

"I wouldn't have offered if I wasn't." There was a teasing smirk on the lawyer's face that was too irresistible to be ignored. Duo leaned forward and imprinted that crooked grin onto his own lips, then felt everything around them fade as their tongues engaged in a very pleasant dance.

Heero finally broke off the kiss with a chuckle. "I guess that means you accept my invitation. Do you want to start packing now?"

Studying Heero's face closely, Duo could see the dark circles under his eyes and the signs of exhaustion and the lines around his eyes and mouth. "You're tired. I'm pretty sure I'll be alright staying here tonight, as long as you're with me. I think the both of us would benefit from a good night's sleep. We'll pack up in the morning and head out for your place, if that's alright with you."

"Are you honestly comfortable with the idea of staying here tonight?" Heero questioned.

"Just hold me, then I'll feel safe."

Heero laid his hand on his lover's cheek and softly stroked the flesh under his fingertips. "Duo, I..." He looked into the eyes of the man in his arms, and was almost overcome by the strong urge to say he loved him, but he hesitated. He fleetingly questioned himself over whether or not he really loved Duo, or if what he was feeling for the long-haired man might be the rush he experienced when falling head over heels in lust for someone. He couldn't deny the strong feelings he had for the gorgeous, violet-eyes man, but were his feelings for him more than attraction and wonderful surprise at their compatibility? Would these overpowering feeling for Duo remain intact after a week of living together? He couldn't remember having anyone stay at his apartment for more than a weekend; he honestly never wanted anyone to stay that long. With that realization he experienced an epiphany, a clarity of thought revealing just how much he wanted Duo, wanted him in his home and in every aspect of his life. Awed by that revelation, he knew with a certainty that he did love the man, and loved him in a way he'd never experienced before. Realizing he'd found the love of his life was a very heady experience. Despite the fact that this wasn't an ideal situation, having Duo come to live with him presented them with an opportunity to learn by trial whether or not they could spend their lives together. God, he wanted this to work; he had to make this work.

Seeing that his lover was awaiting for him to continue, he decided to keep this revelation to himself for the time being, seeing that he needed to concentrate on the problem before them, Duo's safety and peace of mind. "I'll do everything in my power to keep you safe."

Duo's grin was almost back to its normal brightness when he said, "Thanks, I know you will." He then chanced the subject by asking, "By the way, are you hungry?"

Nodding towards the white bag on the entry table, Heero shook his head. "No, knowing you would have eaten already, I stopped and had something to eat before coming. I even brought the leftovers. How did dinner go with Hank and Jason go, I mean, before the tire incident?"

The chance of subject helped to calm Duo further. "It was good. Uncle Hank doesn't seem much different from when I knew him as a kid, only the fact that he's gay and comfortable talking about it." The braided man frowned, something was definitely bothering him about his uncle, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was. "It feels weird, though, talking to him again. He's been gone so long, and with his changed circumstances, he seems like a stranger. Jason's kind of quiet and reserved, but he seemed to listen to everything I said and responded now and then with a comment. He's cool, I guess, and he earned some points tonight by driving me all the way back here."

"Maybe in a couple of weeks, if you like, we can all get together for lunch or something."

Duo's eyes brightened at the suggestion. Heero's offer could be taken as another sign that the man really harbor deeper feelings for him. "Yeah, I guess that would be good. I just don't know how Aunt Helen is going to deal with Hank being back in my life. She never wanted to talk about his leaving or their divorce. I've always wondered why things fell apart, but she refused to say anything about him other than good riddance."

"In light of his involvement with Jason, I suspect she found out about his attraction to men."

Duo's eyes widened with understanding. "That would explain her constant lecturing on the evils of homosexuality. Shit, I can't even imagine how hurt she must have been by his deception, and royally pissed if he pulled the wool over her eyes all those years. That explains so much." He felt like he'd finally found a missing piece to a puzzle that better explained his aunt's behavior.

Agreeing to spend the rest of the evening in the bedroom, he set about the task of checking the locks on the windows, even though no one could possibly enter the apartment through them, being several floors above ground. With each passing moment felt his composure returning. Being inside his familiar home was comforting, especially with Heero there. While he finished up, Heero took his bag of leftovers to the refrigerator with a promise to follow him to the bedroom and turn out the lights on his way.

After a visit to the bathroom, both he and Heero retired to the center of the bed, clad only in their boxers. With arms and legs draped comfortably around each other, they watched a science fiction movie on The Movie Channel. Heero fell asleep halfway through the movie, the background sounds and voices fading into a unintelligible background drone.

Duo found his concentration lacking that night, and he paid only minimal attention to the movie, especially after Heero fell asleep. For over an hour he kept ran over all that had happened that evening, trying to reason it out. Had the slashing of his tires been a random act of mischief, like Heero and his uncle believed? Of course it was possible, but it just didn't feel like that was the case. So if it had been deliberate, how had the stalker trailed him to the restaurant? He hadn't been aware of anyone following him, despite being alert to his surroundings. It seemed an impossibility in L.A., being the enormous city that it was, that someone could find and follow him without losing him in the traffic. Unless the man had been waiting outside his apartment building and had watched him drive away. The idea that someone might be stalking him made his body shudder with fear and dread.

"Duo?" Heero questioned sleepily.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to wake you," he replied, placing a kiss on Heero's stubbled face. "I'm going to take an Ambien and then turn off the television, alright?"

A mumbled assent accompanied the withdrawal of the arms around his body. Moving slowly out of bed, Duo used the light from the TV to navigate around the end of the bed and make his way to the adjoining bathroom, where he closed the door before turning on the light. He removed the appropriate bottle from the cabinet, hoping it would help calm his thoughts so he could sleep. He tipped the bottle and tapped one pill into the palm of his hand, then thinking he might need a little more help to sleep through the night, he tapped out another. He swallowed both pills with a cup of water from the faucet, then turned off the light before exiting the room.

He stopped short after opening the door. The bedroom was black. He distinctly remembered the T.V. being on when he left the room. Why was it off? "Heero?" he whispered. A grunt came from the direction of the bed. "Did you turn off the TV?"

"Come back to bed," the lawyer mumbled sleepily.

"Did you turn off the T.V.?" He didn't dare take another step until he had an answer.

"You said you wanted it off, right?"

"So you did?"

After a long pause, he heard Heero yawn and say, "Yeah, I did."

Relief washed most of the fear out of Duo, though his knees felt almost too weak to carry him the short distance to the bed. He made it, however, due to sheer willpower and knowing there was warmth and safety only a few feet away. Crawling over Heero and under the covers, he turned over and snuggled up to his lover.

"You're cold... and shaking," Heero observed, suddenly sounding more alert. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I... I just panicked for a second after finding the room was dark, that's all."

Heero wrapped his arms around him and shifted slightly so that Duo could lay his head on his chest. The steady beat of a caring heart and the strong arms holding him did a lot towards calming the bit of fear that lingered. "Thank you for staying, Heero, and for being so good to me."

He could almost hear a smile in Heero's voice as he answered. "You're welcome."

Within minutes, Heero was asleep again. How Duo envied the other man's ability to fall asleep so easily, and he wondered if that's how he always fell asleep. Living together ought to answer that and many more questions he had about his lover. Of course, Heero's ability to sleep could be because the man was exhausted from an arduous week at work, and truthfully, so was he. But the evening, specifically, seeing all four of the tires on his car slashed and having felt so utterly helpless, kept him from relaxing enough to sleep.

In retrospect, he'd attribute what happened next as a result of his scare moments ago, envisioning his ruined tires in his mind, as well as his reaction to that discovery. As he lay in the dark, the memory of the attack from the week before surged like a tidal wave over him. Suddenly he was reliving the whole ordeal, and was caught up in the terror once more. He was in the dark alley, his back on a cold surface and unable to move his arms and legs while the shadow of evil loomed above him, touching his body. Oh, God, he was helpless again, unable to stop what was happening.

He heard a distant sound, a steady beat that knifed into his terror. He reached for it like a drowning man grasping for a life preserver, focusing on the comforting, steady pulse of... of a heart. With relief he knew it was Heero's heart he was hearing. He focused on counting each wonderful beat in order to push away the horrible memory of being attacked and from calling out for help. Eventually, the continuing steady rhythm helped to center him and reject the all-to-real memory of that night, slowly bringing him back to the here and now. Though his panic and fear had lessened, his own rapidly beating heart was a reminder of the flashback. Dammit, he hated this. Hated feeling like a helpless victim. He breathed in deeply and then did it again, and the scent of his lover helped to settle him a bit more. Thank God Heero was there. He couldn't imagine what would have happened without his physical presence, or his heartbeat dragging him out of the nightmare.

After a few moments, disgust began to seep in because of how easily he'd been frightened. His flashback had been triggered because he'd freaked out simply because the T.V. had been turned off and the room was dark. This wasn't like him at all, he told himself. He wasn't a man who fell apart that easily. It was becoming more and more obvious that he needed to talk to someone about this, and that thought brought about the decision to call Dorothy in the morning and ask for a recommendation to a therapist dealing with the aftereffects of having been the victim of an attack.

Having come to that conclusion, some part of his mind calmed and the medication he'd taken earlier began to do its job. A short while later he felt himself drifting to sleep, his head resting on his lover's chest. The fears and worries, that would no doubt plague him for some time to come, were also put to rest, at least until the Ambien wore off in the morning.

TBC

Author's note. Ambien, gotta love it. ^_^ Sorry for the long delay in posting. I had two nasty viruses on my computer I had to get rid of, then I was unable to hook up with the net for three weeks due to a change in providers. Talk about frustration! Added to that, the ever present dog drama continues at him house. My old chihuahua had to have all her teeth pulled out. Poor baby, and poor bank account. Hopefully the next chapter of this story will be up in a week or so. Thank you for your patience.


	19. Chapter 19

The Pretender

Chapter 19

Duo woke up Sunday morning and instantly recalled the night before. Taking a deep breath, he felt relieved that he'd have a full day before returning to work to put the tire slashing incident behind him. He smiled, remembering that he was going to move to Heero's place today. With a stretch and yawn, he relaxed again, thinking about what he needed to pack to take with him. Feeling a slight movement next to him, he turned his head and opened his eyes to see Heero staring at him with an expression he couldn't decipher. Before he could say good morning, Heero cut him off.

"What was it you said last night about Wufei finding your apartment?"

Oops! He was hoping that accidental slip the night before might have gotten past the other man. Considering how upset he'd been and that Heero didn't question him about it, he'd was certain he wouldn't have to explain himself. He should have known the sharp lawyer wouldn't let anything, no matter how small, slip by unnoticed.

"It's no big deal, Heero. I came home one day and Wufei was waiting outside my door. He said he got my address from one of the reporters who followed me around."

At first Heero looked dubious, then concerned. "What did he want?"

Debating a moment whether or not to tell Heero the truth, that his "friend" was not a very nice person, Duo quickly came to a decision to say as little as possible. Let Wufei confront Heero with his accusations and deal with the consequences. "He came to see how I was doing, having figured out I was the person who'd been attacked that night."

Heero looked less than pleased. "And?"

"And what?" He tried for an innocent look, but dammit, he wasn't any good at lying. Pretending was something he could do well, but outright lying to someone, especially Heero, was something completely different. Heero's left eyebrow rose to a questioning arch. He was obviously going to wait for an answer. Trying to look unconcerned, Duo gave in with a sigh and said, "And I think you'll be hearing from him soon. If you haven't figured it out yet, he's not over you, Heero, and he's got it fixed in his head that I'm not what you need or want."

"Really? Not what I need or want?" Heero reiterated, noticeably irritated. "And I suppose he thinks he alone meets those requirements?"

Duo shrugged, refusing to repeat the entire conversation with Wufei, revealing just how unpleasant the man had been to him.

Heero moved quickly, leaning over him, chest to chest and gazing down at him with gimlet eyes, making Duo want to squirm. "What do you think, Duo? Do you believe what Wufei said?"

Reaching up to run his fingers through Heero's hair, he replied, "Not even for a second."

"That's too bad," Heero said, unable to pull off looking disappointed because of the slight twitching at the corners of his mouth. "I was looking forward to proving to you just how much I do want you."

Pulling Heero down a bit more, until their faces were only inches apart, Duo said with a teasing grin, "Well, there might have been a nanosecond where I might have wondered if he was right."

"Well, there you go," Heero said, grinning back. "I now have my work cut out for me now." He then proceeded to wipe any minute doubt his lover might have had about their relationship.

Though he felt safer staying at Heero's apartment, believing no one knew where he was, Duo remained on edge as he and Heero settled into living together. For the first couple of hours he felt like a pampered guest, but as Heero began to tackle his weekend chores, shopping for groceries for the week ahead, doing his laundry and studying over some briefs he'd brought home with him, Duo began to get a feel for what his life might be like living with the successful lawyer. Heero was a busy and dedicated man, and he liked his life and home run in an orderly manner. While he wasn't a slob, Duo didn't think twice about leaving his clothes draped over a chair for a couple of days, or discarding his shoes in the bathroom. He decided he'd have to make it a habit of picking up after himself in order to keep up with Heero's housekeeping standards. That shouldn't be too difficult, right?

They left for work together on Monday morning and Heero, as promised, dropped him off outside his office building with a quick goodbye kiss before he sped away to his own office. The moment his lover was out of sight that uncomfortable feeling that seemed to haunt him lately, of being vulnerable and thinking that someone might be watching him, sent Duo running to the front door of the building. He slipped into the elevator just before the doors closed, joining a large number of fellow office workers on their way to the upper floors, finding many familiar faces among them. Even amongst people he saw everyday, he couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching him. Feeling the slight jarring movement as the car began to move upward, he wrapped his arms around himself and closed his eyes, wishing everyone would just disappear.

"Duo? Are you alright?" The concerned female voice came from his left. The elevator car fell silent.

Opening his eyes, he turned his head to see not only Bridget Morris from fabric design looking at him with concern, but everyone else in the elevator as well. "I'm fine," he managed to choke out, knowing he hadn't fooled anyone.

The elevator came to a halt and the doors opened. Unable to help himself, Duo dashed out and away from the crowd, regardless of not knowing what floor he'd landed on. Bridget called after him, but he ignored her as he headed for the stairwell, calling himself an idiot ten times over for the public display he'd put on in front of his co-workers.

From the number displayed on the inside of the stairwell door, he realized he had six levels to climb to reach his own floor. Knowing he was going to be late if he didn't hurry, he dashed up the stairs, letting the exertion distract him from the encroaching fear that clouded his thoughts.

He should have known that his odd behavior would not go unnoticed nor unremarked on by his fellow co-workers. He hadn't realized how quickly word would spread until he barely missed a colliding with Charise as she hurried out the door of his office, a worried expression on her face.

"Duo!" she exclaimed, grabbing his shoulders and holding him at arms length in order to give him an appraising once over. Then frowning she said, "You look absolutely fagged."

He grinned at the double entendre his boss often used, an inside joke between them. "I'm okay, Charise. Just a bit freaked out today but I'll be fine now that I'm here. Really, I'm fine." He could see by the look on her face he hadn't convinced her that everything was "fine".

Letting go of him and stepping back into the reception room, she tugged him along by the sleeve until she had him inside her office with the door closed behind them. Turning and folding her arms in front of her she demanded, "What's going on?"

Beneath her scrutinizing gaze he felt compelled to tell her of the weekend's events. She listened patiently and was careful not to let anything in her expression or manner indicate whether or not she was alarmed by the slashing of his tires or that he believed it had been the serial killer who'd done the deed.

"So you're living with Heero now?" she asked, one eyebrow rising in question.

"Temporarily. Until the killer is caught."

Another long pause followed, and as she continued to study him he began to feel like a bug under a microscope. Was she trying to read his mind or drive him crazy? He glanced wistfully at the door, wishing he could escape. Then with a sigh Charise relaxed her stance. "Well, now that you're living with Heero I won't have to worry about you after you leave here. Really, Duo, you're about to be the cause of some very unsightly gray hair sprouting from my head, and we can't have that now, can we?"

Knowing Charise would never allow a gray hair to mar her perfect and very expensive coiffed hair, he offered her a smile as he replied, "Then I guess I'll have to pay for your next hair coloring session with Raphael."

His boss aimed a crooked and teasing smile his way. "I don't pay you enough for you to afford my Raphael's talents. He's outrageously expensive, but worth every penny." She proudly patted her stylish hairdo.

Duo glanced back at the door again, feeling a strong urge to return to his desk. "Guess I should go and see what my slave driver of a boss has left on my desk."

He turned back to smile at Charise and was surprised when she leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. "You are dear to me," she said, pulling back. After giving his cheek an affectionate pat, he nodded towards the door. "Now get that beautiful ass of yours back to your desk, dig up Carlin and get him in here pronto. I want to see what other fabrics he unearthed in Hong Kong last week."

Feeling better, he left the woman to her work, chuckling to himself as he returned to his desk. There he found a stack of requests and receipts he'd have to sort through, organize and file appropriately. For once he welcomed the distraction of what looked like a very busy day.

Surprisingly, the week passed more smoothly than he thought possible, with nothing out of the ordinary happening that might indicate he was being stalked. It became part of their routine for Heero to drop him off each morning and pick him up at the end of the work day. With the pressing demands of several important clients and cases approaching their day at court, Heero either dropped him off at the apartment to return to his office for several hours, or he brought work home. Wanting to be supportive of his lover's work, Duo either made or had dinner delivered each night. Typically, by eleven they happily crawled into bed together. If it wasn't for the lingering threat of the killer still at large, Duo would have believed that their living together was working out well. There hadn't been any arguing or petty disagreements that often occurred when two people began the process of merging their lives together.

Friday finally arrived, and before they left for work that morning Heero stated his intention of devoting the entire evening to his boyfriend. The anticipation of having Heero to himself, without work interrupting, had Duo smiling all day long.

After work, they picked up burgers, fries and a six pack of beer before heading home. Duo laughed at something Heero related about his day in court as the sat together on the sofa. While opening the bag and distributing the food, Heero turned on the television and switched to the Sci-Fi channel, having heard from a colleague about a new program that was to air that night, featuring alien vampire-like creatures who preyed on a crew of space explorers. Settled in for a guys' night, they were just getting into the program when, during a commercial break, a news update flashed on the screen.

Both men straightened in their seat as they listened to the newscast. Heero turned to Duo and watched all color bleed from his face. Slapping a hand over his mouth, Duo whispered, horrified, "Oh, God."

Heero's arm gathered him against his side, his free hand cupping his face and turning his gaze away from the television to him. "It's alright," he said firmly. "He can't get to you. I'm here and you're safe."

"Another victim," Duo whispered, horrified. In his head he imagined the young man, the latest victim, being murdered in the way Detective Dawson had described. Stunned, violated and mutilated. With a lurch of his stomach, Duo bolted from the sofa and ran to the bathroom, barely making it in time before losing his dinner to the porcelain bowl.

Sensing Heero behind him, he waved a hand, warning the other man to stay away. Respecting the unspoken request, his lover remained at the bathroom door while he slowly gained control again. Flushing the toilet, he stood slowly and went to the sink, hoping to gain his composure before having to talk to his boyfriend. In the mirror's reflection he saw Heero watching him and their eyes locked. Taking a step forward, Heero put a comforting hand on his shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Before anything could be said the phone rang.

Heero hesitated, but Duo gave him an upward nod of his head in the direction of the ringing. "Go on, see who it is. I'll be fine."

Looking torn, it took a moment before Heero sighed and left the bathroom. Several moments later the ringing stopped, and he could hear Heero's pleasant tenor voice address the caller.

Duo took a moment alone to look at his reflection. "Why did you survive the killer's attack and the others didn't?" he asked himself, feeling oddly guilty for being alive.

He nearly jumped out of his skin when the sudden sound of Heero's voice came from the door, announcing, "It's Detective Dawson. He'd like to speak with you."

"Give me a sec to brush my teeth," he said, quickly searching for his toothbrush and the mint paste from inside the cabinet. Locating both, he took care of the unpleasant taste in his mouth. Wiping the leftover froth from his mouth, he reached for the phone in Heero's outstretched hand. Holding the receiver to his ear, he grabbed hold of Heero offered hand and together they moved back the living room.

"I'm sorry," the detective began after the briefest of hellos had been exchanged. "I wanted to warn you of what was happening before the media announced it on the air. Guess I was about three minutes too late."

"Where was the body found?" Duo asked, his voice as shaky as his nerves.

"Downtown, in a public park across the street from the city offices, stashed behind a garbage can."

"Was he..." Duo couldn't finish the question, as if saying the words would make the picture he'd envisioned in his head moments ago become reality.

"I can't say much at this point, but it clear we're dealing with the same murderer, not a copycat."

"What about my tires being slashed last weekend? Were you able to get any prints off the car that might identify the killer?"

"We don't know it was the serial killer who damaged the tires of your car, Mr. Maxwell. Yes, we found quite a few fingerprints, but they didn't match anyone in our system, and some of them even belonged to children. It would probably be a good idea for you to remain alert and be cautious, keep an eye on your surroundings and stay indoors after dark."

"I'm doing all of that, but I still don't feel safe."

"Then maybe you should take a vacation, go somewhere out of state for a week or two. With any luck we'll have the bastard in jail by the time you get back."

Leave town? The tempting idea took root in Duo's brain. Leaving L.A. would put him out of reach from the killer and away from all the stress. It sounded like the perfect solution, but he didn't like traveling alone, and besides, where would he go? He didn't know if he could leave work while Charise was planning her next season as well as a trip to Tokyo, booking models, photographers and anything else she wanted. And then there was Heero. His boyfriend had been working like a fiend during the past two weeks. He could ask him if he'd like to run away for a week or two, but chances were that Heero wouldn't be able to leave work either.

"I'll think about it," was his reply to the detective's suggestion.

"Just let me know where you're going and when you'll be back, alright?"

"Yeah, I'll let you know." They exchanged a brief goodbye before Duo handed Heero back the phone.

"So?"

"He suggested I take a vacation, get out of town for a couple of weeks."

Heero's frown deepened, but he didn't say anything.

"I don't suppose you have any vacation time, do you?"

Heero sighed and combed his fingers through his already messy hair. "I've got two weeks of vacation time left, but it's just not possible for me to leave my cases to anyone else at this juncture. I'd have to give at least a month's notice to my bosses and clients before taking more than a day or two off."

"It's okay," Duo was quick to ease the other man's conscience. "I didn't think you could. Charise would probably give me the time off, but I don't really want to go anywhere alone."

"Do you have any friends who might be able to go with you?"

Duo frowned. Sure, he had a lot of friends, but most of them were casual acquaintances. Trowa had been his closest friend over the past couple of years, but that relationship had been damaged and it was yet to be seen if it could be repaired. "No. There's no one else I can ask."

"I'm sorry."

From the look in his eyes, Duo could tell that Heero was being sincere. He couldn't help from leaning forward and kissing the frowning lips, then pulled back to say, "Don't be. Leaving town was just a suggestion. There's really no need for me to go anywhere. I feel safe here, with you."

A relieved smile appeared on Heero's handsome face. He reached out and put his hands on Duo's waist before pulling him up firmly against his chest. "Well, I hate to say it, but I'm glad. I like having you here and, honestly, I wasn't looking forward to not having you around, even for a little while."

Lifting his right hand to run his fingers down the side of Heero's face, Duo replied, "I love being here with you." The kiss that followed that declaration was slow and breathtaking. When they finally parted, Duo laid his head on Heero's shoulder and breathed heavily onto his lover's neck.

"Ready for bed?"

Duo smiled, then pushed his pelvis forward to let Heero know just how ready he was. "Yeah, I am." With his hand clasped in Heero's he was led by his lover into the bedroom where they unhurriedly undressed each other before falling naked onto the bed together.

A little over two hours passed after he'd fallen into an exhausted, sated slumber, Duo woke with a start. He must have gotten too warm and moved away from Heero's warmth, because he found himself at the far edge of the king-size bed, and arm dangling over the side. The room was dark, the apartment quiet. He strained to identify the sound that had disturbed his sleep, and there it was again, a soft, muffled moan and a slight smacking of lips.

"What the hell?" he mumbled to himself as he turned over to face Heero, thinking his lover was dreaming. He debated a brief moment over whether or not he should try to wake him, but then paused as he tryed to understand what he was seeing. The illumination from Heero's digital alarm clock cast just enough light to show movement on the other side of the large bed. He blinked, now desperately trying to focus his sleepy eyes. He blinked again, realizing the lump under the blankets was too large to be Heero. If he could believe what he was seeing, it looked like someone was in bed with them, and that "someone" was... was attacking Heero.

He froze, unable to breath as the sudden stampeed of fear trod over the impulse to run Several seconds passed before the need to save Heero overcame his temporary paralysis and spurred him into action. In a sudden, fluid movement he thrust the blankets off the bed and launched himself at the top of the large, moving lump. The smack of flesh hitting flesh filled the room as he collided with a naked body and propelled the both of them off the bed, hitting the floor hard and with a loud yell. Heero's alarmed shout rang out in the dark.

Acting on pure instinct and desperation, Duo wrestled with the naked person, which he now knew for certain to be male. He hadn't bothered putting on his sleeping clothes after he and Heero had made love, so it was easy to tell that the person trying to dislodge him was as naked as he was and had the same plumbing.

The bedside light suddenly came on, temporarily blinding the three men. Duo blinked quickly, his hands tightening on the wrists of Heero's attacker as the man lay beneath him. It was Heero's shocked voice that brought the struggle on the floor to an end.

"Wufei? What the hell are you doing here?"

Duo blinked, unable to believe his former boyfriend was the person who had attacked Heero. To his surprise, Wufei looked at him with the same expression of horrified disbelief. "Where the hell did you come from?" the Chinese man demanded.

"Me!" Duo angrily flung Wufei's arms away from him and jumped to his feet. "What the hell are you doing here, and why were you attacking Heero?"

"I wasn't attacking him," Wufei returned in an equally heated tone.

It took only a fraction of a second for Duo to come up with an alternative reason for Wufei being naked and on top of his boyfriend. Looking to Heero for an explanation, he noted the confused expression on the man's face before it slowly turned to anger. He looked to Duo and explained, "I thought he was you." Then turning his glare back to Wufei, he demanded. "How did you get in here?"

"I used the key you gave me when you went out of town. Remember you asked me to water your plants? I just never had a chance to give the key back. I haven't seen you at the clubs lately so I dropped by. When I saw your car in its usual parking space, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to surprise you."

It was clear that Heero's patience was wearing thin when he looked directly into the near black eyes and said firmly, "I told you, Wufei, I'm with Duo now. Whatever we had before is over and done with. You had no right breaking in here and sneaking into our bed."

"I didn't know he was here!" Wufei explained through gritted teeth, his venomous eyes turning to the braided, naked man standing above him. Seeing that he was at a disadvantage, Wufei climbed to his feet and quickly turned to gather up the clothes he'd obviously discarded without much care when he entered the bedroom with only one goal in mind. "I thought I'd remind you of what you were missing, knowing what a cock tease Duo is."

"Shut your mouth or I'll shut it for you," Heero hissed as he climbed out of the bed and fought back the urge to knock some sense into the Chinese man. "My relationship with Duo is none of your concern." Then with a quick glance at his lover, Heero barked, "Duo, please put some clothes on."

Now that his adrenaline was ebbing, Duo blushed at being naked in front of Wufei. He moved quickly to the closet and removed Heero's robe and threw it on. Thankfully, Heero, having gotten up after their lovemaking to check the doors and windows, had at some point before going to sleep put on a pair of boxers.

"I'll let myself out," Wufei mumbled, ignoring Duo as he addressed Heero.

"Oh no you don't," Heero said sharply, grabbing the retreating man by the arm. "Do you think you can just break into my apartment, sexually assault me and get away with it? I think a phone call to the police is in order."

"You've got to be kidding me," Wufei said, looking indignant. He then shot an uncertain glance in Duo's direction. The braided man folded his arms across his chest and wisely kept out of the confrontation between the two other men.

"I'm completely serious." Heero let go of the Chinese man's arm and quickly moved from the bed towards the living room, where the phone was kept.

"Wait!" Wufei, still in the process of putting on his pants, hopped after the departing man. "I made a mistake, alright? I apparently misread the situation and I'm sorry. Please, don't call the police."

Duo followed both men out of the bedroom and down the short hall to the living room. Heero, he noted, already had the phone in his hand and a grim look of determination on his face.

"Heero, please." Wufei earnestly pleaded.

Heero paused with his hand poised to dial. "I'll make a deal with you," he said in a no-nonsense tone. "I'll forego calling the authorities if you give me my key back as well as your word that you will never, ever break into my apartment again."

"I promise," Wufei rushed to agree.

"And I want you to leave Duo and I the hell alone. No more interfering and no talking behind our backs. If you do, I'll make sure everyone at the Palomino Club as well as all your other haunts know that you're nothing but a jealous stalker." Heero knew Wufei had his pride, and for him to be considered not only a jealous gay man but one that stalked his dates, would seriously jeopardize his reputation at his favorite clubs.

Wufei's shoulders slumped slightly, and for a very brief moment Duo understood the Chinese man's motivation and sympathized with him. They were both in love with Heero. He was pretty sure Wufei's feelings weren't reciprocated by Heero, not after the way his lover spoke to him moments ago. Knowing first hand what it felt like being cast off for another, he felt a momentary pang of pity for the other man; and then the moment was gone.

Heero moved to the front door and opened it, then motioned with a wave of his hand for Wufei to get out. Slipping on his shoes, the ebony haired man complied with the silent request, keeping his eyes down the entire time. But as he passed Heero on his way out, he paused and looked at the man he loved with eyes that reflected his misery and said, "We could have been good together, Heero, and you know it."

"Maybe, but whatever we had, whatever it meant to either of us, it ended the moment I met Duo." Then softening his tone he added, "I don't know what else to say, Wufei, other than let me go and move on. That's my last word of advice for you."

With nothing left to say, Wufei straightened and squared his shoulders, then gave a simple nod of his head and walked out of Heero's apartment, and hopefully, Duo thought, out of their lives once and for all.

Heero shut the door behind him and locked it for a second time that night. "I am so, so sorry," he said as he turned around.

Shaking his head, Duo replied, "You've nothing to be sorry for. It wasn't your fault."

Heero moved forward, his hand reaching towards Duo, who clasped it in his own when he got close enough. "Let's go back to bed and try to get a little more sleep," he suggested. The braided man nodded in agreement and let his lover lead him back to the bedroom, turning the lights out behind them as they went.

TBC

Note: Thanks again to everyone who reviewed. I'm sorry I can't reply to each and everyone of you, but I am grateful for the feedback.


	20. Chapter 20

The Pretender

Chapter 20

Charise's eyes lit up the moment Duo mentioned Detective Dawson's suggestion that he leave town. "That works out perfectly," she announced with a wide grin on her face. "As you know, I'm leaving on Friday for Hikaru's fashion show in Tokyo next week. Why don't you come with me?" Seeing the look on his face she put up a hand to halt the protest that was coming and quickly added, "I know, I know. I usually leave you here to hold the office together while I'm away, but this time I want you to come with me."

With growing enthusiasm for the topic she gushed, "Oh, Duo, it will be wonderful. We'll go to that fabulous restaurant I visited last year, and you'll experience firsthand the shopping and the markets. You won't believe how fantastic they are until you've been there. Please, please, please come. We'll have so much fun together."

Charise was pulling out all the stops, saying please three time, not to mention the look on her face was one Duo was very familiar with; it was the _This is the most brilliant idea _look. Charise was obviously wanted him to go to Tokyo with her, and there was probably no way, other than a trip to the hospital, that would deter her. Truth be told, a part of him wanted to go, having harbored a secret desire to see Japan, but he really didn't want to leave Heero, especially since their living arrangement was so new. He said as much to his boss.

"Nonsense, Duo. We'll only be gone a week. Besides," she gave him a conspiring wink, "everyone know that absence makes the heart grow fonder. I promise, when we come back you'll have some of the best sex you've ever had."

Talking to Charise about any aspect of his sex life was almost as mortifying as it would be talking to his Aunt Helen about it. Right on cue, his face began to heat up with embarrassment. "I'll have to talk to Heero first and see if he's alright with me leaving town."

Charise smiled at him, pretty much ignoring what he'd just said as she ordered, "Book yourself a seat in first class, next to me, if possible. I know it's late notice, but if you call Charles Schmidt and tell him I'm requesting the change, I'm sure he'll do everything in his power to make sure you're properly accommodated."

Friday evening found Duo seated next to Charise in a very expensive, first-class seat as the plane to Tokyo climbed rapidly into the dusky sky. He gazed back at the retreating lights of Los Angeles as they gained altitude. Placing his hand on the cool window, he closed his eyes and thought of Heero. His lover hadn't been pleased when he told him he was leaving the country for a week, but Heero said he understood his wanting to get away from the city, from his fears and the nightly news reports regarding the serial killer, or rather, the lack of progress in finding and arresting the bastard. Regardless of his reluctance to leave Heero, he felt a great amount of relief for leaving his troubles behind him, at least for a week. If he really tried, he could almost pretend that there was no stalker, that he didn't still feel the freak's hands on his body, or what it felt like to be helpless under an assault. A shudder shook his body and he wrapped his arms over his stomach.

"Are you cold? Should I have the stewardess get you a blanket?"

Duo looked to his left as he answered his boss. "No, I'm fine. I'll wait until after the meal to get comfortable and sleep."

Charise sighed with resignation. "I do hate these long flights, they're so tiresome."

Pulling a prescription bottle out of his pocket, he gave it a shake and grinned. "I packed enough Ambien for the both of us. Flying during the night and sleeping most of the way is supposed to help with jet lag."

Charise wiggled into a more comfortable position. "Thank God for that. I can't abide jet lag either. I just knew having you along for this trip was going to be the best idea I had this week." She turned her head and winked at her clever assistant. "And when we land we're going to kick up our heels in Tokyo. You wait and see, dear heart, this is going to be a week you'll never forget."

Charise's smile was contagious, well, almost. Duo did his best to match her grin, but found his heart just didn't agree with her upbeat mood. He missed Heero already, and his fear of the killer hovered over him like a dark cloud, despite the distance he was putting between himself and L.A.. He wondered if it was even possible to pretend, even for a week, that he was the same old Duo, the guy he'd been before the attack. He was good at pretending, right? He'd invented Laredo and got over his fear of sex. Couldn't he pretend for the next seven days that the attempt on his life never happened?

"Relax, Duo. Everything is going to be alright." Charise reached over and squeezed his arm in an attempt to reassure him. Duo noticed the tone of her voice was deliberately soothing. She was probably sensing his inner turmoil and was trying to comfort him. Hell, his emotions were probably written all over his face.

"Promise?" he asked softly.

With a lopsided grin she asked, "When have I ever said anything I didn't mean?"

"Never," he answered, and finally managed to give her a real smile.

Monday, Heero returned to his apartment at the end of the work day alone. The absence of his lover was acutely felt, and his apartment, hell, his life, suddenly felt empty and colorless. He never would have believed how much one person could impact his life. He knew Duo would have begged off going to Tokyo if he'd asked, but he knew how unsettled and frightened his lover had been since the attack. Added to that, his tires had been slashed and Wufei had made a shocking appearance in their bed. No matter how hard he tried to make Duo feel protected and secure, his lover couldn't overcome the memory of the serial killer's attack or the feeling that he was being targeted again. A part of him was glad Duo had gone with his boss overseas, hoping he would have at least a week free from looking over his shoulder. With luck the killer would be caught while his lover was in Japan. But if that didn't happen, he'd wish for Duo to realize the odds of the killer finding him in this enormous city was definitely on their side. Hell, if he wasn't so tied up with his cases, he'd take his boyfriend to Europe until the bastard was behind bars. The idea of showing Duo Paris by night, London by day and waking up in Rome or Florence was very entertaining and helped to dispel some of the gloom he felt at being left behind for the week.

He was just taking out his wok to stir-fry come chicken and vegetables when the phone rang. It was Duo's uncle.

"No, Duo's not here. He's out of town on business."

"He didn't say anything to me about going out of town," his uncle stated, sounding puzzled.

Hank's comment irritated Heero, and so it was with heavy sarcasm he said, "I didn't know he needed your permission."

"No, of course he doesn't," the older man sounded amused. "I just thought he'd let me know he was going away. I had hoped to take him out to dinner sometime this week."

"You can call back next Sunday. He should be back by then."

"How about you, Heero? Would you like to come over for dinner one night? I think it would be nice to become better acquainted with the man who makes my nephew so happy."

He considered the offer for a moment. Getting along with Duo's relative would probably make his lover quite happy. He had nothing else to do that week, other than an enormous amount of work at the office. "With my work load this week, I don't think I can break away for an entire evening, but if you'd like to come up here, we can meet somewhere near my office and have dinner, spend an hour or two getting to know each other a bit better."

"That sounds doable. How about Wednesday? Jason has his bowling league on Friday and a class at the junior college Tuesday and Thursday nights, so he should be able to join us on Wednesday."

"Wednesday sounds good. Do you know where Radaccio's is located?"

"Yes, downtown near the Disney Concert Hall. Is seven o'clock alright?"

"Sounds good. I'll call if something comes up and I can't make it."

"I look forward to getting to know you better, Heero. We'll see you Wednesday."

They bade each other a pleasant goodnight and Heero hung up the phone. After a moment he realized how quiet the apartment was, and that set him to thinking about what he could do to keep from dwelling too much on Duo's absence. He reached for the T.V. Guide and the remote, hoping to find something to keep him distracted until bedtime.

"I miss you." Duo said the moment Heero picked up the ringing phone.

"There are no words to describe just how much I miss you," Heero replied, grinning at the sound of his lover's voice. He'd just closed his laptop and was about to leave for work when the phone rang. "So what do you think of Tokyo?"

"I've never seen anything like it," Duo replied enthusiastically. "You should see it at night, Heero. The lights and the billboards are beyond anything I've ever seen before. Charise claims they inspire her to use bright colors in her designs every time she comes here."

"Maybe someday we can visit Japan together."

There was a pause before Duo replied with enthusiasm, "I'd love that. Do you speak Japanese?"

"I understand Japanese better than I can speak or read it. My grandparents emigrated here in the fifties. They taught their native language to their children, but only spoke it in the house, saying that America was now their country and they needed to speak the language. My mom raised me the same way."

"I could have used your translating skills earlier today," Duo lamented. "Charise sent me out to buy lunch at one of her favorite restaurants. I wandered around for about three hours, completely lost. By the time I got back to the hotel it was dinner time."

Heero wanted to protest Duo's wandering around Tokyo by himself, but he reminded himself that the stalker was in L.A., not Japan. Instead, he managed to chuckle at his lover's story. "Don't tell me she sent you out again."

"No, she'd given up on me and went out to dinner with a couple of other designers. I was left with a bag full of cold food, which I dumped and then ordered room service."

"You're doing more than fetching meals and sitting in your room, I hope."

Duo assured him he was, then told him of the places he and Charise had been in the two days they'd been there as well as the people they'd seen. For the next thirty minutes they talked about everything and nothing at all, each soaking up the other's voice. With regret, Duo announced he had to say goodbye and go to bed. Charise wanted him to accompany her to breakfast in the morning with a fabric supplier, one that specialized in high quality silk material. Heero had almost forgotten the fifteen hour time difference between L.A. and Japan. He was just beginning his day and, Duo was at the far end of his. They bid each other goodbye, rather reluctantly, with a promise to call the same time tomorrow.

Heero entered the doors of the Radaccio several minutes before seven. He wasn't really surprised to find the other two men hadn't arrived, knowing very well that the freeway traffic often made arriving on time impossible. He was led to the reserved table and ordered a drink. He was looking over the menu when Hank and Jason walked in together. Hank was dressed in tan dress slacks with a dark blue pullover sweater while Jason wore black trousers and a white, button-down shirt beneath a black leather jacket. He had to admit the two men looked good together and wondered what he and Duo might look twenty years down the road. He did a mental double take. Never before had he envisioned himself spending his life with one person, but the idea of having Duo by his side, going through life together, warmed his heart. And now that he'd envisioned his future with Duo, he couldn't imagine the man not being in his life, home and bed. He couldn't help smiling as he realized he was hopelessly in love with Duo Maxwell. He was still smiling when he looked up and greeted the two men as they approached the table.

Dinner was surprisingly pleasant. Hank did most of the talking, though he did try several times to draw Jason into the conversation. From his own observation, Heero believed Hank's lover was reticent by nature, but when the man failed to relax and his reserve didn't ease up, Heeor began to feel uncomfortable sitting next to him. His discomfort cause him to talk more than usual, answering Hank's questions about his profession, interesting cases and then more carefully addressing Jason's quiet inquiries about his and Duo's relationship.

All in all, he found Duo's uncle easy enough to be around, but his lover not so much. Several times he noticed Jason staring at him--though trying not to be obvious about it–and more than once the man's hands, resting on the edge of the table, curled into fists as if he were angry about something. Heero wondered if Jason wished he were somewhere else that night, and if Hank had more or less obligated him to come to dinner.

Heero bid the two men goodnight around eight thirty and returned to his office for another two hours of work. It was nearly eleven when he shuffled down to his car in the lower level parking garage. He was really tired now, and knew exactly what it meant to be "dead on your feet." He hoped he could make it home without endangering others by falling asleep at the wheel. Pulling his key chain out of his pocket, he pushed the button that unlocked the doors. Opening the trunk, he set his briefcase and laptop inside, then just as he was about to shut the hood he heard a slight sound from somewhere behind him. He spun around, alarmed, his heart in his throat. "Who's there?"

The garage contained only a couple of other cars and was dimly lit. There didn't seem to be many places to hide, but the pillars would conceal someone if they really didn't want to be seen. "Is anyone there?" No answer. And then another idea came to him. "Wufei? Is that you?" The distant honking of a horn was the only sound in the garage, other than his slightly irregular breathing. Despite the continued silence, he couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching him from the shadows.

Without turning around, he shut the hood of the trunk and swiftly moved from the back of his car towards the driver's door. Never in his life had he opened the door and gotten into the seat faster. The doors were locked the minute he hit the seat, and after a bit of fumbling, he managed to start the engine. A moment later he was tearing out of the garage, leaving tread marks on the cement floor.

It wasn't until he was halfway to his apartment that he calmed enough to wonder at his behavior. He shook his head, chiding himself for bolting like he had at the slightest noise. The building was probably just settling, that's all. Then why couldn't he shake the feeling that he hadn't been alone in the garage, that someone had been lying in wait for him. Once again he tried to rationalize the unsettled feeling he still couldn't shake. Duo's recent attack had heightened his sense of awareness of his surroundings, especially after the tires of his car had been slashed, and the both of them jumpy and wary since then. That could explain his reaction in the garage; he was simply jumping at shadows. Having come to that conclusion, he did his best to dismiss the incident and concentrate on making his way home.

Some twenty plus minutes later it was clear he hadn't completely put the garage incident behind him, given the great sense of relief he felt parking in his own space in the garage of his apartment building. He walked briskly to his front door, eyes darting to every shadow and crevice. He immediately locked and bolted the door behind him then took a deep, calming breath. He fought the urge to check the windows, knowing he'd done so that morning. It had become a habit he'd gotten into since Duo had decided to live with him.

Thinking of his long-haired lover, presently half a world away, he sighed with longing for him. What he wouldn't give to have Duo home tonight to distract him from his thoughts.

He removed his shoes and left them by the door, then took off his jacket and hung it up on the coatrack and went straight to the bathroom, intending to wash his face and brush his teeth before collapsing on his bed. He couldn't wait for this hellish week to be over.

Duo returned from Tokyo late Saturday morning and Heero greeted him at the door with open arms, which the braided man promptly fell into. "It's so good to be back," he said, wrapping his arms tightly around Heero's neck. They kissed, and then they really kissed and stumbled their way back to the bedroom where they did their best to make up for having spent the week apart.

Duo rolled off the top of his lover with a chuckle, a thin layer of sweat on his upper lip. "Damn, if that's the welcome I get after a week away, I should go with Charise more often."

"Don't," Heero said with a smile as he let his head fall to the side to look at his lover. "I promise to make mad, passionate love to you every night if you'll just stay here and never go away again."

Pulling himself up against Heero's side and laying his head on his shoulder, Duo grinned contentedly. "Sounds great. Let's shake on it."

"I think we did more than just shake," Heero chuckled, wrapping his arms around the long haired man and holding him close.

"You just shook my world, that's for sure."

"Give me ten minutes and I'll do it again."

Duo laughed happily as he playfully tickled his lover's ribs, enjoying the sight of the other man's body writhing beneath his rapidly moving fingertips.

"Stop!" Heero gasped, grabbing for the quick and elusive hands torturing him. It took him a couple of moments before he managed to roll the laughing man under him and capture both of Duo's busy hands and pin them above the braided head. Duo's flushed face, combined with his wide smile, made him irresistible. Swooping down, Heero captured those upturned lips and played with them until the laughter turned to moans.

Pulling away, he gazed into those unforgettable blue-violet eyes. "Duo." He spoke his lover's name with incredible tenderness as he brushed aside the long strands of disheveled hair from the younger man's handsome face. He really didn't know how to explain what he was feeling, but his heart had already told him he'd met his match. Damn, he wanted Duo, and needed him in ways he couldn't even begin to express. The man in his arms completed him in so many ways and no doubt held the key to his future happiness. Was it dumb luck or destiny had he'd shown up in his life so unexpectedly, had shaken his world and reproved his misconceived belief that he could never settle down with one man. He would do whatever was necessary to keep this warm and wonderful man in his life, in his bed, as both his friend and lover.

Duo raised his hand to cup Heero's cheek and with sincerity brimming in his lovely eyes he said, "I know it hasn't been all that long since we started seeing each other, but I've never felt this way about anyone."

"Not even Trowa?" He knew Duo had cared deeply for his former boyfriend, but now that he was mending fences with the man he wanted to know how he felt about him.

"Trowa who?" Though he tried hard to keep a straight face, the corners of Duo's mouth began to twitch just before a smile broke out.

Heero leaned down and covered that smile with his own, then rolled over again until Duo was draped over his torso. Their soft laughter filled the bedroom, and then without forethought Heero blurted out the three words he'd never said to anyone but his mothers, and that had been when he was a child.

The man in his arms and the room as well went still, and he didn't know who was more shocked by his admission of love, himself or Duo. His lover rose off his chest to gaze into his eyes. "Do you mean it, Heero? You aren't being flippant, or just in the moment, were you?"

Heero could hardly believe he'd said I love you out loud, but now having said it, he couldn't deny the truth. Cupping Duo's face in his hands he looked deeply into his eyes. "I do love you, and I'll have you know I've never said that to anyone I've ever gone out with, and that's because I've never felt like this before."

Duo's eyes widened and watered just a bit as his face softened into an expression of incredible tenderness. "I love you, too," he admitted softly.

The two men spent a long moment staring into each other's eyes, hardly able to believe that out of all the millions of people in L.A. they had managed to find each other.

"I'm not dreaming, am I?" Duo asked, then yelped as his bottom was soundly pinched. He instantly retaliated by wiggling his fingers into the flesh of Heero's sides.

"Just proving that you're not dreaming," Heero answered, then laughed as he struggled to escape the playful fingers.

The two lovers remained in Heero's apartment for the rest of the weekend, having no desire to spend even a moment apart. Duo placed a call to his aunt Sunday morning, spending a half hour telling her all about his trip to Japan and promising to be home for Thanksgiving after she made him feel guilty for not having visited. He then called his uncle, but begged off from the invite to dinner, telling the older man he was jet-lagged. If truth be told, he just wasn't ready to go through all the stress, anxiety and paranoia he felt whenever he stepped out of his comfort zone.

It wasn't until he left the safety of Heero's car on Monday morning that Duo stepped out of the lovely cocoon of his lover's apartment and back into the real world, where the fears he'd managed to put behind him when he'd gone to Tokyo returned with a vengeance. Regardless of being back in familiar territory, jumping at shadows and worrying about being watched or followed, life went on, a fact that became more evident when Charise presented him with an enormous amount of work, stemming from a burst of creative ideas after seeing her competition's designs in Tokyo. A constant stream of people went in and out of Charise's office, including her design team as well as other staff members who were anxious to speak to the woman after her week-long absence. Scheduling appointments, dealing with problems, and running errands for his boss kept him very busy, something Duo was grateful for because each and every task he tackled kept him from thinking about the serial murderer.

In contrast to his hectic days at work, his nights at home with Heero were as close to perfect as he could imagine. From the moment he walked through the front door, he felt safe and secure once again, and that feeling stayed with him as he and Heero prepared dinner together and chatted about as well as any interesting people they might have encountered, and upcoming events. Unless he brought it up, they didn't talk about the killer nor the attack, and his appreciation for Heero's sensitivity grew in leaps and bounds. They went to bed each night happy to shed their clothes and express with their bodies their love for each other. Following a little pillow talk, Duo always went to sleep feeling completely relaxed and immensely happy.

Trowa called Monday afternoon to confirm their racquetball game. Having canceled the week they first planned on getting together, Duo wasn't going to disappoint him again. As he hung up the phone, he was surprised to find that he was actually looking forward to seeing his former friend and that very little, if any, of the resentment and anger he'd experienced after Trowa had dumped him for Quatre remained. Could it be his relationship with Heero, the love they shared, was helping him get over the past? Whatever the reason, he was glad for the change because he honestly didn't want to live his life being angry with anyone, no matter how much they might have hurt him, intentionally or not. He was stuck by another thought, or maybe it was a revelation. Now able to look at everything from the perspective of being head over heels in love, he could better understand the pull Trowa and Quatre had felt towards each other. If they experienced even one half of what he felt for Heero, it was no wonder they made the difficult decision to tell him of their feelings for each other, and for Trowa to break up with him. For the first time since that painful night he felt as if he was finally on his way to forgiving them.

When his lunch hour on Tuesday came, Duo greeted his auburn-haired friend with a generous smile when they met at the gym. Trowa looked relieved and smiled in return. "You look ridiculously happy," he said as they signed into the club and began the short walk to the racquetball court assigned to them.

"For the most part, I am," Duo grinned.

"What's going on?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

Trowa stopped to stare at his friend and a knowing smile tugged at his lips. "You're in love."

"Head over heels," Duo replied, knowing in his heart it was true.

"With Heero?"

"Of course with Heero," Duo shot back with a roll of his eyes. "Who else?"

"Well, I haven't exactly been brought up to date with what's been happening in your life, so you can't blame me for asking. You could have met someone new."

"You know I don't jump from guy to guy, Trowa."

Trowa looked slightly embarrassed as he replied, "Sorry, you're right. I know that's not the way you operate. Sorry."

Duo had been in too good of a mood to let Trowa's slip offend him. "Nah, it's all right. But for your information, Heero's the one."

The taller man let out a quiet sigh of relief. "I'm glad, Duo. You really do deserve a break, and I'm glad you and Heero found each other, even if it was under unusual circumstances."

"What do you mean?" He wondered if Quatre had told him how he'd met Heero, on that memorable day at the ranch. He didn't recall having gone into details with Trowa, just that he'd met Heero and had sex for the first time.

"That you met him out of the blue on vacation and then unexpectedly ran into each other in your office, that's all."

With a relieved grin, Duo nodded. "Yeah, that was a pretty wild coincidence. So, let's flip to see who serves first."

They played vigorously on the court for forty minutes, and then retreated to the showers to ready themselves to return to work. They walked together to the street, chatting and feeling comfortable with each other.

"See you next week?" Duo asked with a grin.

Trowa nodded, then paused. After a moment of hesitation he asked, "Duo, are we good?"

What a loaded question, Duo thought. "You're my friend, Trowa. We're good."

The smile on the auburn-haired man's face showed just how happy that statement made him. "I'm glad. I'll call to remind you of our next game, probably the day before."

"Sounds good."

Duo turned away and made his way back to his office, pleased with how the afternoon was turning out.

His mood remained upbeat throughout the afternoon and remained so after Heero picked him up from work and throughout the evening. His uncle called just after dinner to invite them to his house for a barbecue on Saturday. After conferring with Heero, they accepted the invitation, though Heero said he might have to beg off if something came up at work. Hank sounded genuinely happy that they could make it. Neither man gave the invitation another more thought as they headed to bed a half hour earlier than usual, and not with the intention to catch up on their sleep.

TBC


	21. Chapter 21

**The Pretender**  
**Chapter 21**

Detective Dawson called Friday evening with a dual purpose. First, he asked how Duo was doing, then gently warned him that the killer seemed to be laying low, though admitting that he didn't know what that meant. He advised Duo to be extra cautious. If he had to go out, he shouldn't go alone. Needless to say, the call put a definite damper on the beginning of their weekend.

Though reluctant, Duo eventually allowed Heero to persuade him that having dinner with his uncle and Jason at Hank's place would be just as safe as if they remained in their own apartment. Following Hank's detailed directions, they arrived at the older man's home at the appointed hour, just as the sun was setting. Walking side by side up the brick sidewalk to the front door of the modest home in a middle-class neighborhood, both men were impressed by the well-cared for yard and the neatly maintained, single-storey residence.

Moments after ringing the doorbell, Jason opened the front door. He was typically reserved, with the exception of the minute, Mona Lisa-like smile he wore as he greeted them. "Anything to drink?" he asked as he led them into the living room.

"Nothing for me, thanks," Duo replied and Heero requested a whiskey sour. Jason went to the wet bar and poured Heero's drink and the same for himself while he explained that Hank would be home shortly.

Trying to hide his curiosity while checking out the living room, Duo asked, "Where is he?"

Jason shrugged. "In exchange for the time I spend with my bowling team and night classes, he takes off from time to time, claiming to need some space of his own. I suspect he shops or goes to the movies. He left a couple of hours ago, but promised to be home in time for dinner."

"Leaving you to prepare the meal yourself?" The look on Heero's face as he asked the question showed that he thought it unfair of Hank to invite them for supper and then leave all the work to his lover who, apparently, didn't even live there.

"It's not a problem. Besides, I do most of the cooking when we get together."

Jason suggested they have a seat there in the living room and visit while waiting for the missing man to arrive. Since the older man wasn't the chatty type, it was up to Heero and Duo to keep the conversation going. They were all grateful when Hank showed up five minutes later, a shopping bag with a hardware store logo printed on the side in his hand. He profusely apologized for being late and rushed into the back of the house, saying he needed to clean up.

When he returned to the living room a few minutes later, the four men moved into the kitchen and soon ventured out to the backyard, the soft sounds of jazz music his uncle had cued on his sound system following them. Duo took note of the wood deck, which included a covered hot tub just off the back of the house. He wondered if his uncle and Jason had built it themselves. The yard, outlined by solar lights, included a lush, manicured lawn, a bordering flowerbed, and green and leafy foliage along the tall fence. A small stone fountain in the right corner of the yard produced a pleasing trickling sound that helped make the backyard a pleasant place to sit and visit. The four passed a pleasant half hour sitting at the patio table sipping fruity Margaritas while chatting about the past and things as mundane as the weather.

While Hank barbecued the meat on the outdoor grill, Heero requested the use of the bathroom. Jason led him into the house, giving uncle and nephew a few moments alone.

Without turning, the older man leaned forward to ask, "So how are things between you and Heero?"

"We're great," Duo replied with a wide grin. Setting his drink on the table he leaned back in his seat. "He's wonderful, Uncle Hank. I'm beyond lucky to have him in my life."

Hank turned his head to reply, "I'm glad, kiddo. After the death of your parents, I'd hoped you'd find happiness one day. I remember how traumatized you were when you first came to live with us. We still managed to have some good times, though, didn't we?"

Good times? That wasn't an unusual things to say, but the look on Hank's face as he said it made Duo stop short of replying. A chill shook his entire body as a dark foreboding feeling came upon him.

"But look at you now," Hank continued, giving his nephew a visual appraisal before adding, "You're a handsome man with a successful career, hot lover and a happy life."

The feeling of foreboding grew and caused Duo to squirm in his seat. The way Hank had been looking at him was unsettling, but for the life of him he couldn't figure out why. A side glance confirmed the older man was still staring at him. He looked away and considered his feeling a moment before it came to him why Hank was making him so uncomfortable. The look on the man's face was more than simple approval. Those familiar eyes were drinking him in. Unless he was mistaken, there was more than a little lust there, and dammit, that wasn't the way an uncle should look at his nephew. Uncomfortable now, he looked elsewhere, trying to think of something to say to change the subject.

After a long pause, he felt the need to say something to break the silence. He could ask Hank about his job, having only have a vague idea what his profession was. Looking back at the older man, he was stopped short of asking his question Hank met his gaze and smiled. It was the kind of smile he was used to receiving from the older man. The previous lecherous gleam he thought he'd seen in his eyes was gone, and he wondered now if he'd imagined it. Maybe the reason he thought his uncle had been checking him out was because he'd been upset when Hank brought up the past, specifically the death of his parents. Frankly, he never liked talking about their sudden death, it just hurt too much. It had been such a traumatic childhood event that he'd often found it helpful to pretend his parents' absence was due to an extended vacation.

Rethinking the last few moments, he decided he must have been mistaken. His uncle hadn't checked him out; Hank was simply trying to pay him a compliment. If that was the case, he wasn't going to let an odd comment or the past ruin the evening.

Clearing his throat, he replied, "You're not doing so badly yourself. And Jason seems like a nice guy."

Hank grinned again. "Well, we both have our odd quirks, but that's what happens when you get to our age. All in all, we get along pretty well."

"How did you meet?"

"At the gay pride parade last year. If you haven't learned for yourself, it's a great event for picking up a quick fuck or, as in the case of Jason and myself, something more. He had this mysterious air about him that I just couldn't resist."

Duo tried not to let the shock he felt show on his face. He'd never heard his uncle talk about sex. Thinking back, he couldn't remember Hank, at least while he lived with his aunt, ever cursing or talking so crudely. He wondered now if Hank's former mild manner personality had been a result of his aunt's presence, or out of respect for her religious beliefs.

"Ever been to a gay pride parade? I'll bet you had your pick of guys at those kinds of events."

"No, I've not been to anything like that."

Hank actually looked shocked. "Why not? You'd be a parade stopper."

"I'm not into having sex with strangers."

His uncle turned his gimlet eyes on him. "Then you're missing all the fun. With your looks, you could have your pick of just about anyone."

Duo shrugged. "Guess I'm picky. Heero's the only one I want. He's not my first boyfriend, but he is my first lover."

His uncle's eyes widened and he looked shock. "You don't... didn't...?" With his brows furrowed, the older man took a deep breath and held it a moment before letting it out. "Unbelievable," he muttered to himself, sounding amazed now. Cautiously, as if the man feared he was treading on dangerous ground, Hank asked, "Surely you had some experience with sex during high school?"

Duo shook his head in reply. "Not even in college. There are reasons why I didn't, but I'm not really comfortable talking about them."

There was another long pause, and it seemed to Duo as if the older man was formulating what he was going to say next. Hank's eyes then narrowed with a look of suspicion as he asked,"You were a virgin before Heero? How in the world did you manage that?"

Duo swallowed with difficulty. This conversation was becoming a bit too personal. "Aunt Helen."

Hank's forehead wrinkled as if he was contemplating his answer. "What did she have to do with it?"

Not comfortable talking about something so personal, and thinking that maybe he shouldn't be talking about his aunt to her ex-husband, especially in a negative way, Duo decided to skim over the subjects of his aunt and his sex life as quickly as possible. "Let's just say she frowns on homosexuality. She's doing well, recently retired, by the way, but still keeping busy. She volunteers at the library and reads to little kids, I think, and goes to her church meetings."

The older man rolled his eyes, and with a noticeable hint of contempt in his voice he said, "Ah, yes. Helen's church meetings. She always was quite pious and holier than thou, wasn't she?"

"Please, Uncle Hank, let's not get into blaming her for everything. Granted, she's not perfect, but she is the only family I have and I owe her a lot."

"Alright," his uncle agreed. He then stepped away from the grill in order to clap him on the shoulder. "I'll try not to mention her again. Still, even with all her churchy ways, you and I had some fun, didn't we?"

Duo shot a look at his uncle. Why did he have the feeling that Hank meant something other than playing video games together? That was the second time this evening that his uncle had said something that gave him the creeps. Sure, he had a poor memory, having spent a great deal of time pretending during the years following his parents' death, but he vaguely remember them getting along, and that his uncle had let him tag along when he ran errands, gave him his first taste of beer and was the one to give him the sex and using condoms lecture, against his aunt's wishes, of course. A new thought came to him out of the blue. Hank had told him not only about sex with a female, the typical birds and the bees lecture, but he'd also gone on to explain how gay men have sex. That particular memory caused a stab of pain to shoot through his head. Putting a hand to his temple, he rubbed at the sharp ache, willing it away. He'd gotten these sudden headaches before, and had learned over the years that they were brought on by stress. He decided it was the conversation that must be bothering him, so he decided to try and change the subject to something a little less stressful.

Much to his relief, Heero returned from using the restroom and the conversation turned to their respective jobs. Jason showed up five minutes later. One look at the man's eyes and Duo could tell that the typically quiet man was upset. From previous observations, he figured his uncle's lover preferred standing back and observing rather than jumping into the conversation, but there was something decidedly different about him tonight. He seemed more standoffish than ever, if that was possible, and wary. Duo wondered where he'd disappeared to when he'd guided Heero to the restroom and if something had happened to bring about this change.

He set his concern aside, but noticed throughout the course of the evening that when anyone tried to pull Jason into the conversation, the man seemed distracted, his mind elsewhere. Still, his behavior was odd, but for all Duo knew it might be normal for the man.

The steaks were delicious, as were the side dishes and during the meal Duo was finally brought up to date on his uncle's life after he'd disappeared more than a decade ago. He'd taken odd jobs at first, including a traveling salesman, a truck and tour buss driver, then settled down in L.A. where he obtained more secure employment. From observation, it also seemed like Hank was quite impressed by Heero. He hung on the lawyer's every word and peppered him with questions about his career and the cases he'd handled. Duo was equally entertained as he learned even more about his lover.

They said goodnight to the other men around eleven and drove back to Heero's apartment. The evening left both of them in an upbeat mood and looking forward to some alone time.

Heero had forewarned him before they'd turned in that night, that indicated he intended on spending the morning doing things around the house with Duo, then head off to the office for a couple of hours to finish up several things he hadn't gotten to during the week. Duo, hoping to keep his boyfriend home a bit longer, made sure Heero was fully occupied during the early hours of the morning, then after getting out of bed around ten, they set about doing laundry and splitting up the housekeeping chores. Around two o'clock that afternoon Heero insisted on going to the office. He then kissed him goodbye and promised to be home by seven.

Duo watched him walk out the front door, then wondered what he was going to do to occupy himself with for the rest of the day. He turned on the T.V. only to discover that although there were over 200 channels, there was nothing on worth watching. He poured himself some lemonade and pulled out a book he'd been trying to read for over a month and went to the small balcony that sat off the living room. After an hour or so in the sun, his eyelids grew heavy. With a large yawn he took himself back inside the apartment with the intention of taking a nap on the sofa, hoping that Heero would hurry home.

He woke up and knew by the groggy feeling that he had slept too long and that it was getting late. If he hurried, he could have dinner ready for Heero when he arrived. He rummaged through the refrigerator and decided on a simple meal consisting of a Denver omelet, orange juice and toast. Breakfast for dinner had always been one of his favorite meals, especially since he never had time to prepare a proper breakfast in the morning. It didn't take long before everything was cut, shredded and whipped up, ready to go. All he needed now was for Heero through the front door.

At seven fifteen, the phone rang. "Duo! Thank God. Are you all right?"

The braided man's heart lurched at the panic in Heero's voice. "I'm fine. Where are you? What's wrong?"

"I'm downstairs. Quick, pack a bag for the both of us. Bring enough clothes for a couple of days. We're getting out of here."

The fear in his lover's voice scared the hell out of him. "Heero, what's going on?"

"The stalker knows where you are. Call Detective Dawson and let him know the fucker left a message in our elevator."

"What message?"

Heero's voice was grim and a bit shaky as he replied, "You don't want to know. I'll be there in less than two minutes." The call ended and Duo ran to the bedroom where he left his wallet. He quickly located it and began to search through it for the card with the detective's phone number. It seemed like he fumbled forever before he found what he was looking for and pulled it out. With fingers almost too shaky to press the buttons, it took sheer determination on his part to punch in the numbers and wait while the call went through.

Dawson picked up his phone on the fifth ring and Duo quickly relayed what Heero had said.

"What kind of message?"

"I don't know, Heero wouldn't tell me. He says we're getting out of here. I... I'll call you back when we find a safe place to stay tonight, alright?"

"Sounds good, but be careful. I'll call either your cell phone or Heero's if I need any additional information."

Duo jumped and looked up with the phone still at his ear when Heero threw open the door and burst into the room. His face was unusually pale and his eyes wide with alarm. "Is that Dawson?" he asked, advancing with a hand held out towards the phone in Duo's hand.

"Yes."

"Let me talk to him." Heero took the phone out of his lover's hand and disappeared down the hall to the bedroom and shut the door behind him. Duo collapsed onto the sofa and buried his head in his hands, thinking the worst.

Heero returned five minutes later and put the phone back in its jack, his expression remained grim. "I guess you didn't have time to pack, so let's get to it."

Duo followed him into the bedroom and without a word they made quick work of throwing a variety of clothing into a large suitcase, including shoes, toiletries and anything else they could fit into another, smaller case. Once they were closed and latched it was time to leave. Grabbing cell phones, laptops and pulling on their jackets from off the hall tree that stood next to the front door, Duo reached out and grabbed Heero's arm before he could open the door. "Tell me what's in the elevator."

Heero ducked his head as he said, "Please, Duo. You really don't want to know."

"I'm going to find out sooner or later, aren't I?"

Heero shook his head, his lips stubbornly pressed together.

"You can't protect me from everything, Heero."

Heero looked up then, his eyes meeting his lover's gaze. Duo's breath caught in his throat at the look of profound sadness in those deep blue eyes.

"I'll tell you once we're out of here," Heero said with some effort. "Come on, we're taking the back stairs to the garage. I contacted the manager before coming up, and he was on his way to lock down the elevator until the police can get here. I want to be long gone by then."

"The message is that bad?"

Heero's self control seemed to crack for a moment. His breath hitched slightly when he tried to answer the question. He bit his lip and settled for answering the question with a nod. After that, Duo decided it might be better not to ask about anything else until they were safely away.

Together they rushed out the front door, momentarily pausing to let Heero lock the front door while Duo kept a wary eye on the hallway. Finished, Heero nodded towards the stairwell. "Let's go. We'll go down that way, then steal around the back of the building to the parking garage."

Duo wanted to ask why they didn't just take the more direct route to the garage, out the front door, but sensing the urgency of the moment and thinking his rising fear about to choke him, he couldn't seem to get the words out.

Following his boyfriend to the stairwell, he realized Heero was moving not only quickly, but quietly as well, as if he was afraid of alerting someone to their presence. Did he think the serial killer was in the building? The thought of that vile, evil man hiding somewhere in the building made him ill. Swallowing down the taste of bile, he followed Heero down the stairs, copying his movements to the best of his ability and trusting his lover implicitly to lead him to safety.

When at last they left the building, it was dark outside, but the apartment complex was well-lit along the walkways that wound through the garden area to the pool and then parking garage on the other side.

"Follow me and be as quiet as possible," Heero whispered.

Duo nodded and followed his lover off the lit paved path to the shadowed area along the side of the building, behind the ground cover and shrubs. They deliberately kept to the shadows, hiding as much as possible. In the distance the wail of sirens could be heard, and with each passing moment they seemed to be getting closer.

They were both relieved when they finally reached Heero's car. Duo glanced at the elevator, where Heero said the message was, while his lover Quickly set the luggage into the trunk of the sleek sports car. Slamming the lid, Heero nudged him to get moving. They rushed to get inside car, locking the doors the moment they were in their seats and the doors were shut.

"Where are we going?"

"Away," Heero stated brusquely as he started the car and shifted into reverse. The loud squealing of the wheels echoed their urgent need to get away from the cement parking structure and the message left in the elevator. As they raced down the street, heading towards the freeway entrance, Duo couldn't seem to take his eyes away from Heero's hands, tightly gripping the steering wheel, his knuckles uncharacteristically white. Whatever Heero had seen in the elevator had shocked and scared him. From his lover's response, Duo knew his so-called message had to be bad. He had an idea what was in the elevator, and he had to fight down the bile rising once again in his throat. Gripping the armrest with one hand, and the edge of his seat with the other, he stared at the road ahead, rocking back and forth as his imagination and fear began to run wild. While the rocking really didn't really comfort him, it did help to keep him from screaming his fool head off.

The sudden ringing of the cell phone in the pocket of his jacket startled the both of them. Fumbling, Duo managed to get it out of his pocket, open it and put it to his ear.

"Duo?" It was his uncle. From the sounds in the background, Hank was also in his car and on his cell phone.

A wash of relief swept over him. "Oh God, Uncle Hank."

"What's the matter?" By the tone of his voice, Duo knew his uncle realized something terrible was going on.

"He found me. The stalker found out where I was staying, and Heero said he left me a message in the elevator."

"What kind of message?"

"I don't know. Heero hasn't told me."

"Where are you?"

"We're in the car. I don't know where we're going. We're just getting the hell away from there."

There was a pause on the other side of the phone before the older man said decisively, "Come to my home, both you and Heero. Jason is out of town for the weekend so we've got the house to ourselves. You can stay with us for as long as you like and no one will be the wiser."

"Let me ask Heero. Just a sec."

He promptly relayed the invitation to Heero. Though his mind was going in ten different directions, Heero stated that this might be a short-term solution and agreed, hoping to get his bearings and figure out their next move. They both had a good life in L.A. and jobs neither of them could walk away from.

"Here's an idea," Hank added. "Why don't you and Heero drop your car off in a public place, like a movie theater or mall. I can't help but wonder if this guy has somehow bugged your car. That would certainly explain how he found you. If that's the case, I can pick you up and drive you to my house and throw off any tracking device."

Again Duo relayed Hank's suggestion, and the look on Heero's face indicated that he had never thought about the possibility of either of them being tracked. Heero related the incident in the parking garage at work, where he felt he was being watched. It was possible that the serial killer had followed him and tagged his car. They agreed to meet at a mall located just off the highway, about ten minutes down the road, in the parking area across from the movie theater.

Driving an older model, grey Honda sedan, Hank pulled up alongside their parked car ten minutes after they arrived. It took less than a minute for them to make the transfer of luggage into Hank's car and, and seconds to get inside the vehicle and lock the doors. Within moments they were speeding down the freeway toward Hank's home.

After the older man questioned the two about their well being, the interior of the car turned silent. "I'm glad I called when I did," Hank said, glancing in his rearview mirror at his nephew in the back seat. "I was just on my way home from the store when I thought I'd give you a call. Are you two hungry?"

Heero murmured that he wasn't while Duo peered out of the back window, looking for any sign that they were being followed.

"Do you really think he bugged the car?"

"No, no, Duo. That was just a guess about how you might have been followed," Hank answered, returning his eyes to the road. "We're just taking precautions. We'll call the police tomorrow morning and have them check out the car, all right?"

As the tension in the car grew, conversation between the three quickly diminished. To ease the situation, Hank turned on the radio. Duo vaguely recognized the DJ's voice and the station as one Charise's favorite. It played hits from the last two decades, with no news being aired. He ached to reach over the seat and turn the channel, hoping to find out what happened back at Heero's apartment building. Knowing that it was probably too soon for the news stations to report anything, he decided to turn to his only source of information.

"What was in the elevator, Heero?" He braced himself for the answer.

Without turning around, Heero answered in a choked voice, "Another victim."

Imaging the scene Heero must have faced, Duo leaned forward to put his hand on his lover's shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. From Detective Dawson description, he knew the killer's MO, and by the way Heero was acting, it was clear he'd seen something horrifying. He didn't have the strength nor stomach to listen to a detailed description of the scene, so he let the rest of his questions go to ask an equally essential one. "Do you know who the victim was?"

Heero answered in a voice that sounded haunted. "A guy who lives on the second floor. His name is Jackson Byrne." He paused a moment then with difficulty added, "I dated him once, before he met his partner, Landon. They're both nice guys and in love with each other." After a moment he somberly added, "Landon's going to be devastated."

"I'm sorry," Duo whispered. Seeing as how the stalker had followed them to Heero's apartment building, a wave of guilt swept over him. It was his fault that this guy Jackson was dead and his lover was going to be grieving.

Heero finally came out of his stupor and turned in his seat to face his boyfriend. "Don't think for even one second that this is your fault. It isn't."

Duo nodded, more to ease the worried look on Heero's face than agreeing with him. Several long moments passed with only the familiar strains of a Green Day song quietly filling the car. Hank cleared his throat before saying, "So how about those Dodgers?" Receiving no response, they listened to the radio.

Ten minutes later they pulled up in front of Hank's house. Even though everything seemed normal in the suburban neighborhood, both he and Heero paused before getting out to cautiously study their surroundings. While Hank grabbed their bags out of the back of the trunk, Duo took Heero's hand I his own, needing the contact to ground him. Heero clasped his hand tightly, and together they managed the walk to the front door, three steps behind the older man.

The front of the house was dark and Hank spent some time fumbling with the key to get it into the lock, which only made the two guests more anxious to be inside. Duo hated feeling this way, so damn afraid. It seemed lately that fear had taken over his life and he wondered if he would ever feel safe again.

Once the door opened, the three men spilled through the entrance to the house and Hank turned on a light before turning to re-lock the front door. With a sigh of relief, he turned to his guests. "There, all safe. Come this way and I'll show you the guest room, then I'll go back out and get the groceries and the rest of your things."

Almost in a numb trance, the two obediently followed the older man down the hallway. Duo remembered from his previous visit that there were photographs on the hallway walls, scenery shots of places his uncle had visited during the past ten years.

"Why don't you put your things in here and then we'll work on getting something to eat. Keeping busy is better than sitting around worrying, don't you think?"

He pushed the door open with a nudge from his shoulder, and entered the bedroom. He set down the two bags and turned on the ceiling light before stepping back to allow Heero and then Duo to enter. "I'll see you in the kitchen when you've had a few minutes to collect yourselves."

"Thanks, Uncle Hank," Duo said, not able to manage even a small smile. Still, his appreciation for his uncle's hospitality was sincere, and Hank seemed to see that in his eyes.

With a small reassuring smile and a pat on his shoulder, the older man replied. "It's my pleasure."

Duo shut the door behind him after his uncle left the room. He turned to find Heero standing next to the bed, staring blankly at an empty space on the wall, to the left mirror above the dresser. Concerned, Duo walked up behind him, sliding his arms around his lover's waist. Pressing his chest to Heero's back and wrapping his arms around him, he put his chin on his shoulder before asking, "You okay?"

Heero shook his head. "I can't get what I saw in the elevator out of my head." His voice seemed to catch in his throat just as he struggled to add, "There was so much blood, and Jackson..." Unable to finish, he covered his face with his hands, as if trying to banish the horrible memory.

Duo quickly moved to reposition himself in front of Heero and enbraced him again, holding him close. Both men derived a great deal of comfort from that secure embrace. "It's going to be okay, Heero. I don't know how, but someday this nightmare is going to be over and then we'll get on with our lives. I'm sorry you had to see your friend like that. Hell, I'm sorry he's dead. I... I wish I could have known that sick bastard was going to follow me. I would have done something different."

Heero pulled back enough to study his face, seeing sincere regret in his lover's sad eyes. He reached out and brushed a few stray hairs away from Duo's eyes. "It's not your fault," he assured him. "You have to believe that."

"I don't know what to believe anymore," the braided man answered wearily. "I'm so tired of being afraid and sick of looking over my shoulder all the time. I want my life back, Heero. Our life."

Heero nodded, then brought their bodies together until they were firmly pressed against each other once more. He hoped Duo was right, that their life would soon be back to normal. Unwilling to speak false promises or trite assurances, he said nothing in reply. He could only hope his embrace brought some bit of comfort to his boyfriend.

Five minutes later the two were sitting side by side on the bed with Heero's arm wrapped around Duo's shoulders. "Are you hungry?" Heero asked.

"Not really. How about you?"

"No, but we probably should try to eat something. I think your uncle's in the kitchen making something. Maybe we should go out there, just to be polite."

With a resigned sigh, Duo agreed. "Alright. Why don't you go ahead while I use the bathroom and wash up. I'll be there in a minute."

Heero stood and turned to offer his hand to his boyfriend, which Duo clasped and allowed himself to be pulled to his feet. What he really wanted was to crawl into the bed, roll under the covers with Heero for most of the night and forget everything else. But his boyfriend was right, it would be rude to not make an appearance in the kitchen. He parted ways with Heero in the hallway, promising to meet up with him in the kitchen.

Taking his time, he used the facilities then turned on the hot water and waited for it to warm up before washing his hands and face. Glancing up in the mirror, his face dripping wet, he studied his reflection. The man looking back at him from the mirror had a desperate, hunted look in his eyes. He looked shell-shocked and numb. He continued to wash his face, but that mundane task did little to erase the deep fear that was just shy of overwhelming him. He was deeply shaken and his life had been permanently altered by recent events. The urge to stand up and fight, to defend himself and Heero, to lash out at the situation he had no control over was almost too powerful to keep in check. But the killer was beyond his reach and had remained elusive even to the police. The man, a stalker, and sadistic killer, seemed almost untouchable. He'd eluded the police for months, killing and disappearing without a trace. A shiver of fear shook his body and abruptly brought him out of his dark thoughts. Damn, he wanted more than anything to stop thinking about everything.

In no hurry to leave the safety of the small enclosed room, he took his time drying his face and even attempted to brush his teeth with a finger coated liberally with the tube of toothpaste he'd found in the medicine cabinet.

With some reluctance he finally left the bathroom and made his way through the house towards the kitchen. The sound of cooking could be heard through the open doorway as well as the faint strains of a jazz recording, probably coming from a radio. Recalling a time when they lived in the same house, he knew his uncle had always preferred jazz to other types of music. The familiar sounds helped to calm him, and seeing Heero sitting at the kitchen table, flipping through a magazine, helped to placate his fears. Hank was at the stove, stirring the contents of the pan that was over a low flame, when he sensed his entrance and looked over his shoulder and smiled at him as he entered the kitchen.

"So what's for dinner?" Duo asked as he walked over to the stove to take a look. To his own ears he sounded less than enthusiastic about eating.

"The quickest thing I could think of making was chicken fettuccini Alfredo," Hank replied, turning his head to give his nephew a smile.

"Sounds good." Duo looked at the thick white sauce and wondered how he'd manage to swallow even one bite. Normally he would love the pasta dish, but his stomach was currently churning, and not from hunger. He hoped his uncle wouldn't pressure him into eating very much or he might end up hugging the toilet before he turned in for the night. "Don't make too much pasta, Uncle Hank. I'm afraid my stomach's a bit too upset for more than a few bites."

"Just give it a try," his uncle said as he continued stirring the white sauce. "Maybe your appetite will return once you've had a taste. In fact, this is just about done. Would you and Heero set the table for me?"

The simple chore kept both he and Heero occupied during the last few minutes that the pasta needed to finish cooking. Hank then drained the noodles in the colander before returning them to the pan and mixing the meat laden sauce in. Duo placed the silverware on the table while Heero opened a bag of salad and poured it into a large bowl. With a loaf of French bread and butter on the table, dinner was ready to be served.

Hank talked through most of the meal, asking questions about both Heero and Duo's week. The first bite or two of the thick white sauce and noodles confirmed to Duo that he really wasn't up to eating. A quick glance to Heero confirmed that his lover's stomach wasn't up to the task either.

Hank used a torn piece of French bread to scoop up his pasta, but when he pushed his plate away, signaling he was done, it didn't appear as if he'd eaten very much either. "Well, so much for that idea," the older man said with a frown aimed at the wasted food. "I guess none of us has much of an appetite tonight. Are you sure you can't eat any more?"

"I'm sorry, Uncle Hank," Duo replied, wearing a look of apology. "With everything that's happened, I think I'm just too upset to eat. Heero's had a horrible shock tonight, so I hope you'll forgive us for wasting your food and the time it took to prepare it."

"Nah," his uncle waved his hand, dismissing his concerns. "It'll keep. Maybe we'll get our appetites back tomorrow. Why don't you fellas go into the living room and watch a bit of T.V.? I'll tidy up in here and join you. Anyone feel like a beer?"

"I could use a soda," Duo replied. "The carbonation sometimes helps to settle my stomach when it's upset like this."

"It's rather late, so nothing for me, thank you," Heero added, rising from his chair with his nearly untouched plate in hand. "And thank you for the meal and for letting us stay the night. We both appreciate your hospitality."

"Don't mention it, son. Though I welcome your company, I just wish your being here wasn't under these circumstances. Still, I'm glad to be of help."

Duo stood from his place at the table with his plate, which his uncle immediately took from him and shooed them off into the living room.

The two lovers settled on the sofa, and being that it was after ten there was very little to choose from on television. They finally selected a comedy show, hoping it would distract them from dark thoughts of the stalker. Ten minutes later Hank joined them carrying a glass with ice and a fizzing cola drink. Duo took one sip and decided by the off taste that the soda must have been in Hank's cupboard a little too long. He hated outdated soda. He set the glass down after another sip, just to be polite, and decided to pass on the rest of it.

"So where's Jason this weekend?" Duo asked.

Hank pulled his can of beer away from his lips to answer. "San Diego. Something work related. I spoke to him just before I went to the store, and he said the traffic was a nightmare."

"He drove down tonight?" Heero asked, showing that he'd been paying attention. "Isn't Sunday and odd day for business?"

Hank didn't so much as blink as he responded, "He'll probably planning on spending Sunday relaxing before his meeting on Monday."

Their attention soon returned to the comedy show, which turned out to be rather lame. After their frightful evening and rush of adrenaline, Duo found himself getting tired. In fact he could hardly keep his eyes open. "Want to turn in?" Heero softly questioned after he noticed his boyfriend's bobbing head and droopy eyes.

Duo nodded, too sleepy for a proper reply. The hand holding his own tightened and tugged until he was pulled up from his seat. Then with Heero's arm around his shoulders, he was led to the bedroom. He yawned widely as his lover closed the door then returned to carefully pull off his clothes. Normally, he'd be a bit more responsive to Heero undressing him, but tonight all he wanted was to climb into bed with the other man and get a good night's sleep.

Heero chuckled as he tucked him in, pulling the covers up to his neck. "I guess neither of us is up for any hot and heavy action tonight."

"No, but maybe tomorrow," Duo mumbled and then yawned. A warm and tender kiss to his cheek sent him into a deep and dreamless sleep.

TBC


	22. Chapter 22

**Warning:** This chapter contains suspense and violence and some not nice things. It's probably not for the faint of heart.

**The Pretender  
Chapter 22**

Something disturbed Duo's deep slumber. He was barely able to rouse himself when he felt a warm hand shaking his shoulder. "Shh..." It was Heero's voice and breath brushing his ear. "I heard something. It's probably nothing, but I better check it out. Stay here."

Some part of his mind knew he should be alarmed, but he was just so damn tired, so much so that moments after Heero's warmth moved away from him he was drifting back to sleep.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been asleep when once again he was awakened, but this time it wasn't because of anything Heero said but by the realization that his lover hadn't come back to bed. Forcing his eyes open, he looked around the dark room until his eyes fell on the alarm clock; it was 3:15 a.m. What time had they gone to bed? Hum... he couldn't remember, but he thought it might have been close to eleven. When did Heero get out of bed? He reached over to feel the area behind him only to find the sheet was cool to the touch. Though his eyelids felt ridiculously heavy, the need to go back to sleep weighing them down, his concern over Heero's absence gave him enough incentive to throw off the cocoon of warm bedding and struggle into a sitting position.

"Heero?" he called out softly, not wanting to disturb his uncle sleeping in the next room.

No answer. Worried, he stood up but then had to pause a moment when the room began to spin and his body swayed wildly. He pressed a hand to his forehead and closed his eyes until the spinning sensation eased. Man, what's wrong with me? he wondered. Taking a few cautious steps forward he found both his mind and body sluggish and slow, as if he hadn't slept in days. This is what he'd felt like the one time he'd taken two Ambien. Wait a minute... had he taken anything before he'd gone to bed? No, he was pretty sure he hadn't? But he did feel like he was under the influence of some kind of drug. But that was ridiculous. Why would someone slip him sleeping pills? He couldn't think well enough to sort this out, being that his head felt like it was filled with wet cotton. Despite how he felt, he need to find out if Heero was alright, and so he continued to stumble towards the front door.

Reaching the doorway felt like a monumental accomplishment. Turning the knob, he opened the door just enough to stick his head out and then listened. The house was quiet, which didn't seem unusual, given the hour. Try as he might he couldn't hear anything coming from the living room, or anywhere else in the house for that matter. So where was his missing lover? A warning chill crept up his spine and roused him a bit further out of his sluggish, near somnolent state.

"Heero!" This time he hissed his lover's name a bit louder. Standing in only his boxers, he felt exposed, vulnerable and cold and he wished he had something in his hand to defend himself with. Not being familiar with his uncle's home, apart from the front rooms, he had no idea where he would find a bat, cane or any other handy tool he could use to defend himself if he needed to.

Slowly making his way along the wall towards the living room, where it seemed a bit lighter than the hallway, Duo strained to hear any noise that would indicate the presence of anyone in the house. Shouldn't he be able to hear his uncle snoring? He vaguely remembered how Hank had been a horrible snorer in the past. As a kid, he woke many times in the dead of night to hear the most god awful sounds coming from his uncle and aunt's bedroom. He'd learned from his aunt that she wore ear plugs every night when she went to bed so that she wouldn't suffer from her husband's sleep apnea. Why wasn't Uncle Hank snoring now?

And then a horrible thought came to him. What if the killer followed them to this house?

All forward movement ceased as that thought took hold, bringing with it a rush of fear. No, that was impossible, he told himself as his knees threatened to give out. There was no way someone could have followed them from Heero's apartment. He flattened himself against the wall for support as another idea came to him. What if... if the killer murdered the man in the elevator as a means to getting them out of Heero's apartment, knowing they'd run as soon as the latest victim was discovered?

Shit!

With a hand over his mouth to muffle his ragged breathing, Duo struggled to calm himself. Panicking would cause him to do something stupid and get him into more trouble. He needed a clear head in order to deal with the situation, if indeed there was something horrible going on. Please, he prayed, don't let Heero be dead. To have finally found the man he'd been waiting for all his life only to have him hurt or captured by the serial killer would destroy him. He'd just found Heero, he couldn't lose him, not like this.

Just as he was about to brave another step towards the living room, there came a faint sound from back down the hallway, in the direction from which he'd come. He couldn't tell what the sound was, but he was pretty sure it came from one of the other bedrooms. Maybe it was Uncle Hank.

Looking back towards the living room, he guessed the faint glow of light he now detected was coming from the kitchen. There was safety in a lighted room, he told himself. But once again that faint, odd sound came from behind him. What if it was Heero, or Uncle Hank, and they needed help? He almost jumped out of his skin when he heard the sound of a faucet running in the kitchen. Water, huh? Could someone be making tea? Maybe Heero couldn't sleep and had gotten up to make himself a cup of tea. Yeah, that made sense. After everything that had happened earlier that evening, Heero must have had a difficult time trying to sleep, and a soothing, warm herbal tea would probably help him settle down. Yes, that seemed a more rational explanation. He suddenly felt very foolish for all the horrible things he'd been imagining.

Okay, he thought, getting a hold of himself, if someone was making tea in the kitchen, he'd better man up and investigate the noise down the hallway. He turned around and focused on the four closed doors he knew were lining the hallway. The darkness in the windowless hall was such that he couldn't even see his hand in front of his face, and so he was forced to inch down the hallway with his left hand pressed against the wall to guide him.

The first door he came to was the bedroom he'd come out of moments before, so he carefully bypassed it, but then stopped as a wave of dizziness caused him a moment of disorientation. Was it being immersed in total darkness that had him feeling so unsteady? Now that some of the fear he felt earlier had subsided, he wondered why his mind and body was still so sluggish. Why were his arms and legs so heavy? Again, this feeling seemed familiar and it triggered alarms in his head, warning him that something horrible was about to happen. Fighting the urge to run and hide, Duo forced himself to take another step forward, telling himself that he was letting his imagination get the best of him. No matter how crappy or scared his felt, he was going to find out where Heero was or if someone was in trouble... and then he'd go back to bed.

With a shuddering intake of breath and a whole lot of determination, he took a step and then another. The bathroom, he knew, was across the hall from the bedroom he and Heero shared. He decided to bypass it until he checked the bedrooms first. The one adjacent to the one he'd slept in was the room he guessed belonged to his uncle, and Jason when he stayed over.

He felt the door frame under his fingertips and continued his search a bit further until he located the doorknob. Grasping it, he slowly turned it and was glad to find it unlocked. Poking his head in the door he whispered, "Uncle Hank?" Not only was there no reply, but there was no sound of any kind; no snoring or breathing in the room. Could he have gotten the wrong room? He didn't know for a fact that this was Hank's room; he'd just assumed that it was. He stepped inside the door and silently shut it behind him as he searched for the light switch. He found the plate and flipped the switch upward. The ceiling light came on, blinding him until his eyes adjusted to the brightness. He blinked several times and held his hand over his aching eyes as he scanned the tidy room. There was a large, empty bed in the center of the room, but the bedding, though made up, was slightly rumpled. On each side of the bed were tables and lamps, and on the left wall a dresser with several pictures of both Jason and Hank, individually and together, smiling for the camera. He blinked, wondering if he was seeing things as he recognized several pictures he'd seen years ago, of himself and Natalie. He swayed again as his mind lurched, causing him to reach out to the wall to keep himself from stumbling forward. God, what was wrong with him?

He blinked and looked around the room again. This appeared to be Hank's bedroom alright, but then why was the bed still made up? Hadn't his uncle gone to bed when he and Heero retired for the night? Something nagged at his memory, but for some reason he was afraid to figure out the reason for his discomfort. Instead of dwelling further on what was wrong, he reached up and turned the light out again then gave himself a couple of moments to adjust to the dark once more before opening the door.

The darkness seemed more oppressive than ever, yet refusing to stop his search, now for two missing men, he felt his way across the hallway to the last remaining bedroom. Again, he located the doorknob and it turned under his hand. But before opening the door, he looked down the hallway to the faint light at the end. To his relief, he could see no movement or shadow coming towards him. With that little bit of reassurance, he opened the door a crack and slipped into the room and, as he'd done before, he searched for the light switch and flipped it on.

This time the light on the ceiling didn't come on, but several smaller lamps set about the room. A sound, like a strangled gasp sounded from the floor before his eyes were able to adjust and focus, and when they did, they widened with disbelief and horror at what lay before him. On the floor, resting on top of a plastic tarp, was Heero. His lover lay on his side, dressed in the jeans and undershirt he'd worn earlier, his arms and legs bound together with duct tape. His body jerked and twitched sporadically, alarming Duo, but it was Heero's eyes, wide with terror, and the gag in his mouth that had Duo in a near faint. This couldn't be happening, he thought, but the evidence in front of him proved that his worst nightmare was coming to life; the serial killer had found them. A strangled sound came from his lover, shaking him out of his paralyzed state.

Throwing himself down on his knees, Duo quickly crawled his way to Heero's side and began to tug frantically at the bindings around his wrists. "Shit, shit, shit," he whispered as his fingers fumbled with the silver tape. Heero's muffled voice seemed to be trying to tell him something, but Duo's focus centered on getting his lover free so they could get the hell out of the house and away from the killer.

"How did he find us?" he asked. "Oh, God! What did he do to Uncle Hank?" He froze, his mounting fear making it impossible to think clearly. He glanced down at Heero who was shaking his head back and forth, and it sounded like he was screaming at him do something. The gag, remove the gag. He knew that was what he needed to do, but he couldn't get his hands to comply. He couldn't think straight, couldn't focus on what needed to be done to free Heero and escape this nightmare.

And just as he pulled the gag off his lover's mouth, a sound came from the doorway behind him and Heero moaned.

Jerking his head around, Duo froze at the sight before him. He couldn't have been more surprised to see his uncle standing above him, a large bowl in his hands and wearing an equally surprised expression. Frantic, but having enough sense to keep his voice down, Duo looked up at the older man with relief and whispered, "Thank God you're alright, Uncle Hank. We've got to get out of here. The killer's found us. Help me get Heero free and then we'll climb out the window."

Instead of jumping forward to help them as Duo expected, his uncle remained in place and simply smiled at him. It wasn't a smile Duo had ever seen before. There was no warmth, love or even humor to be found in the older man's expression, but something that could only be defined as malevolence. Shaking his head, Hank said, "You just couldn't stay asleep, could you? If you'd eaten dinner or swallowed more of your drink, you'd have slept until noon. Oh well," he shrugged, "it's not like I haven't improvised before."

Duo was cried out with surprise when the bowl of cold water was thrown into his upturned face. Before he could react, he was hit with a shock so powerful that he was stunned senseless.

He didn't know how long he'd been out of it, but a dawning sense of urgency nudged him to a more alert state. It took a moment before he could focus enough to determine his position. He was lying face down on a piece of plastic, with his hands bound behind his back, and before he took another breath, everything that had happened before he'd lost consciousness came rushing back. Tapping down on the panic that was rising within him, he cautiously opened his eyes, but just enough to peer through his eyelashes, hoping to assess the situation. A buzzing sound followed by a long moan drew his attention.

No more than five feet away from where he lay was a scene out of a horror movie. His uncle, devoid of all clothing, sat astride Heero, laughing as his lover twitched beneath him. Hank, who apparently had taken off his own clothes as well as Heero's sometime after he'd been shocked into unconsciousness, grinned with satisfaction at his lover's distress.

"You're so damn beautiful," Hank whispered as he leaned forward, hovering over Heero's body. "From the moment I saw you I knew you would be mine. I can't tell you what it feels like to know that I'll be the last person to have you." He then placed his hand over Heero's cheek and caressed it. Scared but defiant, Heero, despite his nervous system having been shocked, jerked his head away, showing how repulsed he was by the man's touch. "Now, don't be that way, Heero. I'm going to be extra nice to you because you're Duo's lover. I promise to kill you before I take my souvenirs. Or," he paused in thought for a moment before continuing, "maybe I'll wait until after I've spent some time with my nephew. Would you like to watch me fuck him, Heero? He has a great ass, but then you already know that, don't you?" Then straightening, the man Duo thought he knew added in a casual manner, "You know, he never really was yours or anyone else's. Duo has always been mine, from the time he first came to live with Helen and I. He was just one of my nasty little secrets. It took some time, but I taught him everything a bottom should know and kept him under my thumb, too scared to tell anyone about my visits to his room. It was just my bad luck, a fluke really, that Helen became suspicious and faked taking her sleeping pills. I should have killed her, pushed her down the stairs like I did Natalie when she found me with Duo, but the police would viewed her death too much of a coincidence, so I let her kick me out. You see, I didn't want to chance losing my freedom."

Listening, Duo's mind was thrown into a tailspin. No, good God, no! This can't be real. Pain shot through his head as his entire world was turned upside down as the door to his past burst open. Memories he'd not recalled two minutes ago came back in an overwhelming rush, and with them came hysteria and horror. With his eyes tightly shut, he struggled with the onslaught of nightmarish scenes flashing in his mind. He wanted to push them back where they came from, not wanting to acknowledge them as real.

The sound of Hank's voice as he continued to brag about what he had done to his nephew, served to snap him out of the mental maelstrom. Remembering that he and Heero were in danger of losing their lives, he tried to focus more on escaping than reliving the past. This wasn't the time for a meltdown or to lose himself in the overwhelming terror that was crowding in on him. He had to do something, and quickly, or Hank was going to do those unthinkable things Detective Dawson had described, rape, torture and mutilation, first to Heero and then to him.

"Ah, yes," Hank continued as he looked down on the helpless man beneath him. "One more jolt and I think you'll be ready for me to begin."

Those words, uttered by Hank, triggered another memory Duo couldn't repress. Though it was fogged, he heard an echo of his uncle's voice, whispering something similar into his ear. "There, now we're ready to begin. Remember, boy, not a sound." A phantom pain and the memory of something unwanted being shoved into him was re-lived, as was the mental scream of a child that echoed in his mind, and it was almost too much for him to repress that once suppressed, agonized cry for help. He pressed his lips tightly together, knowing he needed to contain the pain and the horror of his past as well as the terrifying reality of the present. Yet past refused to be dismissed when he heard his uncle chuckle and he was immediately transported back to a dark, terrifying moment. He was terrified, held captive, and Duo could feel the man's hot breath on his neck as he recalled Hank whispering in the dark, "You're mine, Duo, and you're going to be my bitch for as long as you live under my roof, maybe even longer. And if you breathe a word of this to your aunt or Natalie, I'll slit their throats and make it look like someone broke into the house. Then no one will be around to keep you from me."

The sudden buzzing sound and another muffled moan managed to jerk him out of his flashback. His body was trembling and he couldn't seem to catch his breath. He remembered so much of his past now, and was well and truly horrified. Fighting to control the feeling of panic building inside of him, Duo reminded himself that what he'd suffered at the hands of his uncle when he was still a kid had been terrifying, painful and unforgivable, but what he and Heero were about to experience at the hand of the same man was going to be even worse. How the hell could he have forgotten being abused by the man? It was obvious now that he'd pushed that time of his life to the back of his mind, pretended that it never happened. But why? Now that his memories had been freed, he clearly recalled the threats Hank had made against his aunt and cousin. If he said anything about what his uncle was doing to him, Hank would have killed them. No wonder he'd pretended the abuse hadn't happened. How could a kid deal with living in a constant state of terror other than to deny it was happening?

_Focus, dammit!_ He couldn't afford to waste a moment trying to figure out the past when his future looked so bleak. He could fall apart after he got himself and Heero the hell out of there. Having broken out in a sweat when he'd had the flashback, or whatever the hell that was, Duo thought his wrists might be slick enough to wiggle his hands free from whatever bound his wrists together.

Another dark chuckle from Hank, most likely at Heero's expense, was more than Duo's sanity could handle. He opened his eyes and set his sights on the man who he now realized was the serial killer who had hurt and killed so many people, and he let his hatred fuel his need to act. Without forming a plan, he acted, rolling quickly onto his side and bringing his knees up under himself. He continued the movement until he was in a crouched position, then immediately launched himself at his uncle, sitting on top of Heero with the stun gun in his right hand.

Though his body felt numb and jittery, Duo's aim was true. His head butted into the older man's side, toppling him completely off Heero with a surprised "Oof." Quickly, before the older man could get his bearings, Duo bent himself into a ball once again and, as quickly as he could manage, forced his body through his arms, bringing his bound hands to the front of his body. He was suddenly very grateful that he hadn't taken the time to put his pants on before leaving the bedroom, knowing he never could have been able to free his arms if he'd had his jeans on.

Hank must have hit his head on the desk to his left, because he was slower to respond than Duo anticipated. Spying the stun gun on the floor, Duo instinctively dove for it. His uncle must have realized his intent because he also dove forward and grabbed for the weapon at the same time. Duo felt triumphant when he actually got his hands on the stun implement first, but that feeling ended when his uncle's hands closed around his and tried to jerk it out of his grasp. The two of them commenced wrestling for control of the small disabling device. They twisted, turned and then rolled over Heero who, in his stunned and bound state, merely grunted as they tumbled over and then off of him. Duo's back hit the floor and he used the momentum to keep rolling, pulling Hank with him. Tumbling over several more times, both men fighting to get the upper hand, they knocked a standing lamp over, causing it to crash with a long bang against the lone window in the room.

"Why?" Duo asked through gritted teeth as the weapon came close to his face. It surprised him how strong the older man was. Then again, having a desk job probably hadn't done anything to add to his own wrestling prowess either.

"Why what?" Hank questioned in a strangled voice as he pushed Duo down on his back again, having gained more leverage on the gun.

Anger and pain gripped the braided man as he struggled to speak about the abuse he'd suffered at his uncle's hand. "Why everything? Why did you kill Natalie? Why rape me? How could you have done those things to me?"

"You were simply too tempting to ignore, too ripe for the picking," the older man said with a grunt and sneering grin. "I wanted you from the moment you walked through our front door, and there you were, innocent and more than available, snuggled in your bed every night while your aunt slept soundly next door, thanks to the earplugs and prescription sleep aids she used every night. As for Natalie, she must have heard something, and she walked in just as I was about to come inside you. She turned and ran, but I caught up to her by the staircase. The rest is history. But you somehow forget if all didn't you?"

Again, memories from Duo's past overwhelmed him, they were proof of Hank's confession. Once again he felt the fear, pain, betrayal, grief and shame he'd experienced as a young teenager. With both the memory and the weight of the man on top of him, the past intermingled with the present. The threat Hank posed and wresting for the object in his hand, which would seal his and Heero's fate if he let go, kept him in from falling into despair. Giving up now meant he and Heero would die.

There was pain and a coppery taste on his tongue, and he realized then that he'd bitten either his lip or tongue as the struggle to keep the small stun gun away from his face and neck continued. With Hank practically laying on top of him, Duo could only think of one thing to do. He bucked upwards, momentarily surprising the other man, and shifting him just enough so that his knee, jerking upward forcefully, hit its intended target, causing Hank to let go of the weapon as he doubled over, his hands covering his vulnerable, now bruised parts.

This was his chance, maybe his only chance. Duo pushed himself up and ran for the closed door on wobbly legs, the stun gun clutched tightly in both bound hands. His instincts screamed for him to get the hell out of there and get some help, yet despite his panicked state, he stopped in his tracks, torn between helping Heero and escaping the horror that was his uncle. He looked at the black implement in his hand and came to a decision. He turned it around so that the end with the two prongs faced outwards, a difficult maneuver to manage with his wrists bound together by nylon rope.

"I'll kill you," Hank grunted from the floor. It took everything in Duo to turn around and walk back towards the older man struggling to gain his feet and clutching his bruised family jewels.

Duo depressed the button and was satisfied when the device in his hand buzzed and power discharged with in the space separating the two prongs. Stepping quickly, before Hank could straighten, he lunged forward, his hand still on the button, ready to shock the bastard to kingdom come. Yet before the tool touched the older man's arm, Hank surprised him by dropping down and sweeping his leg out and around, successfully knocking Duo's feet out from under him. He fell to the floor with a hard thud. Before he could get up, a bare foot connected with his jaw, knocking him down again. Another kick landed on his bound hands, which successfully removed the stun gun from his grasp.

Hank dove for the gun. Despite the pain in his face, Duo lunged after him. If he didn't keep going, he and Heero were doomed. Digging his nails into the older man's back, Hank yelled with pain before turning and defending himself. Once more the two of them were wrestling across the floor, each trying to reach the stun gun before the other. One by one the lamps on the floor were knocked over as they continued to fight. Items on the desk fell over when they bumped into it, and Duo received several blows to the head and stomach from the demented man trying to escape his grasp. With his hands still bound in front of him, Duo was incapable of doing much damage to Hank, other than using his fingernails and teeth. It was all he could do to keep the older man from reaching the stun gun, especially when the wiry man had only skin to grab hold of. He didn't want to think about Hank's nudity, fearing what other memories were waiting to be released. It was easy to put those thoughts aside when he was too busy fighting for his and Heero's lives to worry about anything else.

A fierce blow to the side of his head had Duo seeing stars, and his grasp on his opponent slackened. And then a jolt of burning pain struck against his neck and had him writhing in agony but unable to do anything other than moan. And as another punishing shock was given to his abdomen he threw up, spewing stomach bile onto the floor. Hank stood over him, gasping for air and swearing a blue streak about what he was going to do to him. Duo was unable to defend himself as his uncle bent over and grabbed his braid and used it to drag him across the floor until once again he was laying next to Heero on the cold plastic tarp.

"Now that you've had your fun, it's my turn," Hank announced with a lecherous smile and madness shining in his eyes.

The nightmare etched in his mind ever since he was attacked on the streets of L.A. returned as Hank used his stun gun to immobilize his arms and then his legs. With tears being the only way to express his outrage, Duo was helpless to stop what was happening as his uncle ripped off his boxers and stared down at his naked body.

"You're as lovely now as you were as a boy, Duo, and I'm going to remember this night for, well, probably the rest of my life. Too bad you won't be able to reminisce with me, but I'll be sure to take pictures." Moving to the table, the older man reached for a camera and brought it up to his face. The flash of bright light was proof that he took a picture of Duo, lying naked and helpless on the floor. Putting the camera back down, Hank reached to take something else off the table.

When the older man turned around he had a knife in his hand and the look on his face could only be described as evil. Duo's eyes strayed to Hank's bruised penis, which remained limp and swayed slightly as he approached him with the knife held at his side. He wanted to plead with his uncle, beg him not to do what he intended, but only a gurgle came out of his mouth when he tried.

Hank bent over him once again and Duo closed his eyes as the knife was raised. His bound wrists were jerked up, and after a ripping sound his arms fell limp and useless to the floor "I don't need you bound now that you're properly numbed up," Hank explained, sounding satisfied.

His eyes shot open as the older man stepped over and straddled him, giving him a clear view of Hank's entire body. Looking down, the older man said, "Since you interrupted my plans for your boyfriend and seeing that it will take some time for me to recover, I guess it's only fair that I start with you, dear nephew, and let Heero watch." Bending his knees, he slowly eased down until his bare ass was sitting on Duo's lower stomach. Unable to blink, fearing what was about to happen, he watched as Hank set the knife on the floor, then proceeded to slowly move both hands over his chest, sides and arms. The feeling of being inspected, mapped out, quickly changed when those calloused hands began to stroke and tease his body, pausing only to pinch his nipples. What the hell was the man doing?

He was trembling uncontrollably now, and not simply from being stunned repeatedly but also from being scared out of his mind, angry beyond measure, repulsed, sickened and hurting. Detective Dawson's description of how the serial killer's victims had been abused and mutilated kept coming back to him, like he was reading the coroner's report regarding his own death. Though his uncle seemed to be trying to arouse him, his body wasn't cooperating. After enduring several minutes of Hank's touch, the man above him frowned at not getting the reaction he'd hoped for, so he tried something else. His touch became rougher, pinching and slapping him, though he honestly couldn't feel very much.

Unable to lift even a finger to defend himself, Duo opted to take the only escape available, shutting out what was happening, a task he'd proved quite adept at. With his returning memories, he now remembered how he'd escaped those nightmarish hours with his uncle.

It had been his childhood toy box.

In his darkest hours he'd pictured the toy box that had been in his bedroom, in the home he'd lived in with his parents. It was his safe place, a quiet, secure hidey-hole where bad men and pain couldn't follow. Once again he pictured it in his mind, seeing the rectangular oak box his father had made for him when he was a toddler. He even saw the familiar dent on the left side, made by his remote control fire truck when he was five. He ran his finger tips over the smooth wood surface and opened the lid and smiled. There, tucked in the corner, was his blue blanket and Bob, his childhood friend, a stuffed and worn, bunny rabbit. They had been waiting for him all this time. He'd just begun to climb into the box when a sound from his left penetrated his mind, instantly bringing him back to the here and now.

Heero. If it wasn't for him, his lover wouldn't be here. How could he escape into his box and leave the most important person in his life to face this nightmare alone?

Hank was now pulling hair out from his underarms, obviously trying to get his attention, and his cry of pain came out in the form of a gurgle, which seemed only to please the sadistic bastard. Frantic to distract himself, he wondered who would miss him. Charise, of course. Trowa would, but Quatre would probably be relieved he was out of the picture. No, that wasn't fair. Quatre had never really been mean spirited. If he had a second chance, he'd forgive the blond, hell, he'd give him a big sloppy kiss if it meant he was going to survive. His Aunt Helen would definitely mourn him, and no doubt she would blame his horrible demise on his being gay. That left Heero. He tried to turn his head, but the jolt to his neck had made it impossible to accomplish such a simple task. He turned his eyes, and could just barely see his lover lying next to him. Heero had also been hit numerous times with the stun gun and appeared unable to move.

Having detached his mind from what his uncle was doing, Duo realized he'd already resigned himself to his inevitable death. He consoled himself that at least he'd known what it was to love and be loved. If he had one regret in life, it was not having more time to be with Heero. God help him, he loved the man. A tear leaked out of the corner of his eye as he watched his uncle reach for the knife he'd set down earlier.

His eyes, blurred with tears, still managed to follow the knife's path from the floor and his fear rose to new heights. His uncle was staring intently at his chest, as if deciding where to begin. "It almost seems a pity to mark such perfection," the older man said as he ran his free hand over Duo's chest. "But every masterpiece begins with a blank canvas."

The tip of the knife was lowered slowly until it came to rest in the middle of Duo's sternum, the point digging into his skin. "Blood is such a beautiful color, don't you think?" Hank asked as he pushed the tip just under the skin. "The color of love." Duo closed his eyes, unable to watch the man enjoy torturing him to death. He felt the tip of the knife begin a slow journey down the middle of his stomach, not deep enough to cause serious injury, just pain and blood flow. The tip was pulled out once it reach his navel. "Ah, lovely."

Hank shifted down to sit on his thighs before the knife was again carefully placed, just below his navel, and Duo tried to prepare himself for more pain as he fought to control his rising terror. He felt the tip of the knife poke into his skin, puncturing it and then move slowly downward. Still twitching as a result of being stunned several times, Duo didn't know whether he should hope Hank would go slow enough that he'd have time to figure out a way to escape, or if he should pray for a quick end. If he could thrust his body upwards, the knife would plunge into his lower abdomen. Oh hell, on second thought, that probably wouldn't bring a quick death either.

The knife was suddenly lifted, and to Duo's horror his uncle leaned over and, with his tongue extended, began to lick the bloody trail left in the knife's wake. That was sick! He frantically tried to move, to yell, to do anything that would stop what was happening. His fingers twitched but his arms remained unmovable. He tried to move his arms and legs, but they were still useless. The only place on his body that was sensitive was his torso, but Hank had probably figured that in his plans. He was very much aware of the sting of the knife cuts and the wetness of the perverted man's tongue.

Unable to turn his neck, Duo could only turn his eyes towards Heero, hoping for a last glimpse of his lover. He'd waited so long for the other man to come along and felt blessed that he'd finally found someone he could trust enough to love completely. But now it was all coming to a horrible end. If he could speak, he'd tell Heero how much he loved him, and with his last breath he'd thank him for loving him back.

Hank leaned back once more and took a moment to admire his work, blood covering his lips. He must have been pleased because the corners of his red mouth inched up. The knife was lifted once more and Duo moaned with dread. His breath hitched when the tip of the knife came to rest close to his left nipple.

"Stop!"

Heero's shout was unexpected, startling both Duo and the man on top of him. As if he'd just realized that he had control of his lungs and voice box again, Heero took a deep, audible breath and let out a blood curdling scream that was sure to wake up someone in the neighborhood. His lover's single attempt to help them escape came to an abrupt end when Hank picked up the stun gun, lunged to the side and hit Heero in the ribs with another charge.

Duo filled his lungs and let out his own cry for help, but his voice didn't carry nearly as well as his lover's, having been more recently stunned.

"Nice try," Hank smirked as he resumed his position on Duo's thighs. He picked the knife up off the plastic tarp to resume his torture. "Now, where was I?" He asked himself, though the look in his eyes told Duo he hadn't really forgotten. "Oh yes, I was about to cut off your nipples. I already have quite a collection of them, you know. All flattened and dried in a book of Shakespeare's complete works."

Duo trembled as the tip of the knife moved in the direction of his left nipple once again. He closed his eyes, unwilling to watch the grinning man above him take pleasure in mutilating his body.

An abrupt and startling bang shattered the silence the room, coming from his right. Hank jumped and then suddenly the weight on top of Duo's legs was gone and the sounds of fighting filled the air. Duo's eyes flew open and he tried to make sense of what was happening when two bodies, one clothed and another naked, tumbled over Heero's body before slamming into the shelves against the wall. The two tangled bodies rolled back and then proceeded to plow over the two unmoving men again. Grunts and snarling obscenities came from both of the fighting men. Duo's eyes couldn't follow the two, or identify the newcomer as he could only track them by the sounds they were making. He prayed that Jason had returned early and was as shocked and surprised as he and Heero had been by his uncle's hidden nature. The dark clothed man was but a shadow at the edge of Duo's vision, but he was able to see him successfully pinning Hank beneath him and then striking him hard with his fist. Duo counted the number of times he heard flesh slamming into flesh and bone. Seven times he imagined a tightly clenched fist hitting the downed man's vulnerable face. Kill him, kill him, he silent urged.

And then there was silence, well, except for three people breathing harshly. The shadowed figure stood and moved quickly towards the two naked men lying stunned on the plastic tarp. Duo looked up, his vision still blurred by tears he quickly tried to blink away. His rescuer then bent over and looked him in the eyes.

"Fuck, look what that shit's done to you. Are you all right?" Shock, confusion and overwhelming gratitude filled the injured man as he recognized their unlikely savior. He tried to speak to the man above him, but only a squawk and a gurgle managed to escape his throat.

"I called the police before I broke into the house," their rescuer explained. "They'll be here any minute." The man's attention then turned to Heero, and the look of concern that had been on his face while looking down on Duo intensified. He stepped over Duo's trembling body and knelt next to Heero, his hands immediately searching his body for any wounds. With deep concern and something more he asked. "Are you all right, Heero? Did he hurt you?"

"I'm fine. Help me." Heero answered in a weak voice as he struggled to move, to turn towards Duo. "Thank God you came in time, Wufei. How the hell did you know we were in trouble?"

Seeing what Heero's intention was, Wufei leaned forward and helped him turn to his side and, with a hand to his shoulder, held him in place so he could face his lover.

"I followed you from work," the Chinese man answered. "I wanted to talk to you before you left work, but didn't catch you in time. I saw you, but you were too quick getting into your car and driving away. I followed you home and parked my car out on the street in front of your apartment building, but by the time I reached the parking garage, you were pushing the elevator button. The elevator door opened and you gave out a shout and jumped away from what was inside the car. I guessed something was horribly wrong, especially when you high-tailed it up the stairs." With a slight tremor to his voice, Wufei continued. "Before the door closed, I caught a glimpse of the dead man and the puddle of blood in the elevator. I ran all the way back to my car. I figured it was the serial killer who'd killed that guy and it scared me shitless, wondering if I was going to be the next victim."

The sound of distant sirens getting closer caused Wufei to pause with his explanation. "I left the front door open so the cops can come in."

"Hold on, love," Heero said to the man lying naked and wounded on the floor, just out of his reach. "Help's almost here. Is he all right, Wufei? Shit, his entire chest is bleeding."

"The cuts seem superficial, Heero. He's going to be okay, and so are you."

"Hank?" Heero ask with fear in his voice. He tried to look to where the earlier commotion had taken place, but his neck still wasn't cooperating.

"You mean the guy I took down?" Heero nodded. "He's unconscious."

"Make sure he stays that way. He'll kill all of us if he can."

That comment finally diverted Wufei's attention away from Heero as he turned to study more closely the unmoving man not ten feet away. "He's still out."

"How did you know we'd left the apartment and that we were in trouble?"

Wufei paused, and he looked as if he was debating over what to say. Taking a deep breath he said, "After you and Duo ran from your apartment, and seeing that the cops hadn't shown up, I guessed you were in trouble. I.." The Chinese man looked embarrassed as he confessed to what he'd done. "You have to understand, Heero, that I was desperate to know why you dropped me so suddenly and if you were as serious about Duo as you said you were and not just handing me a line, so I contacted a private investigator and purchased a couple of tracking devices. The night I showed up at your apartment unannounced I attached a tracking chip to your jacket before heading to your bedroom. I put another one on your car one night, while you were working late. Between the two devices I was able to follow you here. I really hadn't planned on hanging around all night, once I realized you weren't going anywhere, but I couldn't make myself go home knowing you were in trouble, so I stayed to make sure no one came after you and to see what would happen in the morning."

"Why would you go to such lengths?" Heero asked, disturbed by his friend and former lover's confession.

Wufei looked directly into Heero's eyes as he confessed, "Because I love you, regardless of the fact that you never seemed to reciprocate my feelings." When Heero didn't say anything, he added, "For the longest time I held out hope that one day you'd realize you cared about me too; but then Duo came into the picture. I convinced myself that you were just using him, but there was something in the way you looked at him that told me I'd lost you. I just didn't want to believe it."

Duo listened while Wufei explained his actions to Heero, though the conversation seemed muted, clousded by some kind of barrier in his mind. It was odd, he thought, that he really wasn't shocked by Wufei's confession of his feelings for Heero, though he was surprised by his determination to insure that Heero was safe.

He was distracted from the rest of their conversation by a sound in the distance. The longer he listened to it, the more distinct it became. It took a moment before he identified the sound as a siren. No, make that sirens. Help was on its way, it seemed. He could hardly believe that he and Heero were going to survive this nightmare. Somehow, by luck or miracle, they had sidestepped a horrible death tonight.

He still couldn't move his numb, unresponsive limbs, but his body, or perhaps it was his mind, was beginning to react to night's ordeal. With each passing moment he became more aware of the painful cuts on his chest and the burns on various parts of his body from the electric shocks, but more than anything, he was unbelievably, teeth-shattering cold.

Heero, who had kept an eye on his lover during his short conversation with Wufei, witnessed the moment Duo began shaking uncontrollably. "Duo? What's wrong?" And then more urgently, "Wufei, do something, I think he's going into shock."

"Police!" came a shout from the front of the house.

"In here!" Wufei stood and went to the door to show the arriving law enforcement where they were.

Before he reached the door, a large black man dressed in a blue police uniform burst into the room, his gun held in both hands in front of him, ready to use. His dark eyes quickly took in the two naked men on the floor, the unconscious man off to the side and then the unharmed Chinese man dressed in dark clothing. He promptly turned his gun on Wufei. "Hands up," he ordered sharply.

Wufei quickly raised his hands. "I'm the one who called for help," he explained as two more officers appeared in the doorway. He gave a nod of his head in the direction of the man who lay unconscious on the floor. "That man over there was assaulting my friends when I came through the door. We fought and he lost."

"His name is Hank McGuire." Heero added as loudly as he could manage. "He's the serial killer the LAPD has been looking for. He hurt my partner; please help him."

With another assessing glance at the wounded man, the officer turned his head to those behind him. "Get a blanket from one of the bedrooms. Make that three," he quickly amended.

The house came alive with policemen and questioning voices. The three naked men were wrapped in blankets and the call for an ambulance was made. A police woman crouched down between Heero and Duo, and stayed with them as they waited for the paramedics to arrive, uttering assurances that everything was going to be fine. Meanwhile, Hank had regained consciousness and had been propped up against the wall with a blanket thrown over his shoulders. Two grim-looking police officers flanked him. Hank's face was battered and bloody, his expression varying between glowering and brooding, resulting from either pain or the reality of facing a very grim future. He hadn't spoken a word since Wufei's trouncing, even after he was read his Miranda rights.

The policeman who'd initially come through the door, approached once again and introduced himself as Officer Davis. Heero judged him to be in his thirties and physically fit, looking like a guy who had nothing better to do on his down time than lift weights. After assessing the two victims, he turned to back to Heero and began questioning him about what had happened.

Duo, still on the floor but now snugly wrapped in a comforter from off of one of the beds, was in the process of shutting himself off from the confusing chaos going on around him. The voices and commotion around him provided more stimuli than his traumatized brain could handle. It was too difficult to follow the conversations when his body was shaking uncontrollably and the visions of his newly revealed past kept flashing in his mind.

"Please," he heard Heero say. "Help me reach Duo. He needs help."

"I'll help you," Wufei offered. After receiving a nod of permission from Officer Davis, he bent to the task. With extreme care, he gently lifted Duo from off the plastic tarp covering a good portion of the floor. With the trembling, non-responsive, long-haired man in his arms, Wufei hesitated. "Maybe we should put him somewhere warmer until the ambulance gets here. The floor is too cold and drafty and he's obviously in shock."

Fading in and out of awareness, Duo was lost to what was going on, though he realized something had changed when he felt himself placed on a soft, yielding surface; a bed, his muddled mind provided. Other than the tremors that shook his body, he lay limp and oblivious of the two paramedics who had arrived moments before and were now in the process of unwrapping the blanket covering his body in order to check on the severity of his wounds.

Squeezing his eyes closed, Duo tried to pretend that he was somewhere else, anywhere else. He was desperate to get away and forget everything that had happened that night. All he wanted was to go back to his apartment with Heero and never leave. The need to escape this hellish nightmare and the resurfacing memories of being molested by the man he'd called uncle, who somewhere along the line had become a sadistic serial murderer, was overpowering. He could leave it all behind if he really tried, he knew he could. After all, he'd done it before, completely forgotten the horrible things his uncle had done to him when he was just a kid. A faint, reasonable sounding voice from the back of his mind whispered, _Isn't forgetting the past the reason we found ourselves at Hank's mercy? _ If he hadn't pushed the memory of his uncle's abuse down so deeply into his subconscious, pretending to perfection that it hadn't happened, he wouldn't have put himself and Heero a serial killer's hands.

No wonder he'd had trouble with intimacy. He might not have remembered being abused, but some part of his brain had, and his inability to have sex was no doubt a manifestation of his troubled mind. He'd spent wasted years hiding from the past and putting the blame for his problems on his aunt. Well, she wasn't totally blameless, but he owed her an apology. Damn it all, if he'd remembered his uncle abusing him, he'd have had him arrested or at least told the man to get the hell away from him, to stay out of his life. He never would have accepted his invitations or gone running to him like he and Heero had the night before. He was a damn fool, so gullible, so incredibly stupid.

And then more pieces of his fragmented and forgotten past began to fit together, and the only thing that kept Duo from screaming his rage was his need to understand. Blocking out external sounds and movement, Duo found new clarity of thought. His uncle had orchestrated the murder at Heero's apartment complex, timed it so that his lover would see the tortured body and run back to the apartment to warn him. No doubt Hank had counted on them running. His uncle's call, which had come while driving away from the crime scene, had been perfectly timed to intercept their flight, and under the pretense of a caring relative he'd lured them, unsuspecting, right into his clutches. He felt sick knowing how perfectly he'd fallen for his uncle's manipulations.

"We need to get him to the hospital," declared the paramedic looming over the unresponsive victim.

"All right," Officer Davis said as he entered the bedroom wearing a grave expression. He looked to Heero. "I was waiting for LAPD detectives in charge of the stalker case to show up, but I'll radio and tell them you're headed to the local hospital." He walked up to the edge of the bed and looked down on the two who presented their best hope for sending the sick murdering bastard in the other room to hell. "You'll be safe with these guys," he said with a nod in the direction of the paramedics. "They'll get you to the hospital swiftly and safely. Detective Dawson, I'm sure, is barreling down the freeway like a bat out of hell to meet you there. Meanwhile, we're going to search the premises for more evidence. "

Heero gave the officer a small yet sincere thank you and watched as the paramedics began to prepare Duo for transport. Soon the room was buzzing with activity as the transfer from the bed to the stretcher commenced.

Through all the commotion, Duo was only vaguely aware of some jostling because he was again contemplating the interior of his toy box, including the blue blanket with the polar bears on it and Bob the Bunny. It seemed so inviting. He could rest, safe and sound for a while. A voice momentarily distracted him as he stepped into the box and settled down on the soft, fuzzy blanket. As if from a great distance he heard Wufei asking if he could ride along in the ambulance, explaining to some unseen person that he was the closest thing Heero had to a family. That statement, spoken rather passionately and with a hint of desperation, should have upset Duo, especially since Heero didn't refute the man's claims, but he was pulling the lid of the box closed. He was just far enough into the safest corner of his mind that the Chinese man's words didn't mean anything, they couldn't hurt or offend him anymore.

The ride to the hospital was a blur of fragmented sounds, as was his emergence into the emergency room. Duo was remotely aware of activity going on around him, but tucked inside a safe place of his own making, he couldn't bother trying to figure out what was going on. Hands poked and prodded, a needle pricked his arm and his chest burned, but he didn't care. Before long, he tired of the whole thing and completely closed the lid of his toy box, which sunk him into a dark oblivion that was wholeheartedly welcomed.

TBC

Note: I hope that wasn't too traumatic. Though it was for poor Duo. I'll be kinder to him in the next chapter, promise.


	23. Chapter 23

_Thanks to Kaeru Shisho and Snowdragonct for their help with this chapter. Wonderful writers and lovely ladies. _ See author's note at the end of this long chapter.

The Pretender

Chapter 23

"Duo? Can you hear me? It's time to wake up, Mr. Maxwell."

It was easy to resist the unfamiliar voice urging him to come out of his safe place. Maybe if he stayed here long enough, sheltered and oblivious to outside stimuli, he'd forget everything that had ever happened to him. He settled himself deeper into the quiet of his sanctuary, away from painful memories and having to face the truth.

An unmeasured amount of time passed before another voice broke through the barriers he'd erected. This time the voice was familiar and one he couldn't ignore. Softly pleading, the man called to him again, urging him to wake up and open his eyes. Heero. Yes, that was the name that belonged to the voice. He remembered the man now, his lover. His heart swelled as warm memories of the lawyer filled him; the way those deep blue eyes looked at him and how the man touched him, as if he were the most important person in his world. He knew, without a doubt he loved the owner of this voice and that his heart belonged to him. Heero was pleading now, insisting he wake up, and there was no way he could refuse his lover's request.

Easing open the lid of his hiding place, he cautiously climbed out of the comforting darkness of the mentally constructed toy box of his childhood. which had been sheltering him. A heartbeat or two later he was floating back towards the voice calling for him to wake up.

He blinked against the brightness of the room, desperate now to find his love. He didn't have to look far. Heero was leaning over him, his anxious blue eyes studying his own as if searching for something.

"Are you with me now?" he asked anxiously.

Duo gazed up at the handsome face directly above him, his heart swelling with love for the man. What a wonderful way to wake up, he decided. He blinked again, growing more aware with each passing moment that there was something different about Heero. After taking a moment to study the handsome face wearing a worried expression, he decided Heero looked exhausted and ragged around the edges. He'd never seen the lawyer with so much stubble on his face, nor the deep purple bruising beneath both of his eyes denoting a lack of sleep. It was almost comical how his usual artfully mused hair now resembled the nest of a demented bird. Duo wondered what was wrong with the man.

"Say something, Duo."

Blinking his eyes several times in an attempt to clear his vision, he finally responded in a voice that was rough from disuse. "Come to bed." He patted the place next to him in invitation.

Relief flashed across Heero's face and he managed a tired smile. "Thank God," he replied before swooping down to place a brief and gentle kiss on Duo's lips. Pulling up a few inches, Heero grabbed both of his shoulders, and with tears pooling in his eyes he said, "Dammit, Duo, don't ever do that to me again."

Puzzled, Duo croaked, "What'd I do?" For the life of him he couldn't figure out what Heero was talking about. What did he do to upset him so much?

"You've been out of it for over two days. You opened your eyes every couple of hours, but you showed no recognition indication of me or where you were. The doctor said your wounds weren't severe enough to cause that kind of comatose reaction. He believed you'd retreated to a safe place in your mind as a way of coping with what happened to us. I was half out of my mind when we couldn't get you to wake up. I felt as if you'd left me."

He'd been "out of it" for two days? Duo wondered what in the hell was wrong with him. His stomach hurt, but not from hunger. Gah, he wasn't thinking clearly, his thoughts felt muddled, but he was cognizant enough to see the deep crease between Heero's eyebrows, telling him that his lover had been worrying for a good long while. He reached up, ignoring the tug of the IV strapped to his arm, and pressed his fingers over that crease, hoping to rub the worry line away.

"I'm sorry, Heero, for... for..." He stopped short when the reason why he wanted to stay asleep came rushing back. Memories, too painful to bear, overwhelmed him. Crying out, he pressed the heels of his hands against his closed eyelids, desperate to hold back the flood of memories.

"What's wrong?" Heero asked, sounding alarmed. "Hold on, I'll call the nurse."

"I just want to forget," Duo gasped, his head reeling. "Forget all of it, Hank and the past. It hurts, Heero. God, it hurts."

"No, Duo." Heero gently tugged at his wrists until he managed to pull his hands away from his face, then waited patiently until pained blue-violet eyes finally opened. "I know you're hurting, inside and out, but we can't hide from what happened with Hank the other night, or from what he did to you as a child. Yes, it was humiliating, criminal and frightening, but you don't have to deal with this on your own any longer. You've got me now," he said firmly, "and I promise we'll get past this together and be stronger for it."

Desperate to push away the ugly memories, Duo centered his thoughts on Heero, his lifeline. For the first time since he woke up, he noticed that Heero was wearing a plain gray sweatshirt, generic and forgettable, definitely not the man's usual style. Grabbing the front of that nondescript garment, he pulled his lover closer and noticed the wince of pain that crossed Heero's face, which in turn triggered another wave of fear in him. More gently, he tugged until Heero closer, bringing their foreheads together.

Closing his eyes, Duo breathed in the scent of soap and an herbal shampoo and something else that was uniquely Heero. His voice sounded small and frightened as he whispered, "Tell me you're alight, Heero. Did H.. Hank hurt you? Did that bastard..." He stopped, choking on the words that wouldn't come out. His memory seemed a bit blurry. He thought he remember most of what had happened at Hank's house, but he wasn't sure. Parts of that horrible night were blurred in his mind. Had Hank violated Heero or cut him the knife? He'd never forgive himself if Heero had been hurt like that. It was all his fault.

Putting his hands over the ones gripping his shirt, Heero placed a quick kiss on the tip of his lover's nose . "No, Duo. I promise you, I'm fine. The only problem I have is sleeping more than a few minutes, which is understandable, considering everything we've been through."

Duo felt sick with remorse. "I'm so, so sorry. It's all my fault that Hank got his hands on you."

Heero looked startled by the apology. "Your fault?" And then more firmly he said, "No, Duo, don't you dare blame..."

"He's awake?" a feminine voice sounded from somewhere behind Heero, causing both men to jump slightly from the unexpected interruption. Heero straightened and turned towards the intruder, clearing the way for Duo to look around him and observe a short, blonde-haired woman in a yellow smock covered with monkeys approaching the right side of the bed. "Welcome back, Mr. Maxwell. I'm Cynthia. How are you feeling?"

It took roughly five minutes for the nurse to check his vitals and ask a few pointed questions about his physical state before she turned to leave the room, stating over her shoulder that she would inform the doctor on call that Duo was awake.

After she'd gone, Duo, having done his best to not look like a prime candidate for the insane asylum while the nurse was there, shook his head as his past caught up to him. "I forgot, Heero. Somehow I... I made myself forget what my uncle had done to me, to pretend that it never happened. I was thirteen..." He stopped mid sentence as anger and shame swept over him. He now clearly recalled being assaulted by his aunt's husband, and the rage he felt towards the man was like nothing he'd ever felt before. "How could I forget how much I hated him?" he asked, his body shaking with rage, self recrimination and loathing. "Or how afraid I was of him?"

"Shh," his lover said softly, stroking his right cheek with a feather-light touch of his fingertips. "Don't upset yourself like this. You don't need to say anything more if you don't feel up to it. I heard you and Hank talking and pieced a lot of what was said together. I know he sexually assaulted you. Anyone with half a mind could understand why you buried the memory of what he did to you. I also know he threatened you with the lives of your aunt and cousin, that he kept you in a state of constant fear in order to keep you quiet." A sear of disgust touched Heero's lips as he said, "He bragged about pushing your cousin down the stairs the night she died. He's an amoral monster, a deranged sociopath. He was quite effective in giving you a strong, compelling reason to keep quiet."

Choking on so much shame, hurt and regret, Duo had to look away from his lover, unable to bear the concern and worry evident in those eyes. All he wanted at that moment was to roll over on his side, curl up in a ball and disappear; but even that was denied him. His chest hurt like hell. He could feel the long incision Hank had carved with precision down the length of his chest, and the many stitches holding his skin together. The pain and discomfort from both kept him from wanting to attempt any kind of physical movement, so he was stuck on his back. His only escape was to close his eyes.

Heero didn't push but let him have a couple of moments to himself. He thought of his aunt, of how she might react after learning Hank was the serial killer, and that he'd almost been his latest victim. She'd had so much sorrow in her life already, he didn't know if she could handle another blow.

Filled with regret, he said, "All this time I blamed my aunt for my hangups about sex, but it was all Hank's fault. That selfish, sick bastard killed Natalie and almost succeeded in ruining my life, maybe he did."

"He didn't destroy your life or mine," Heero stated unequivocally. "Look at me Duo." He waited until the pained violet eyes opened at his request and turned towards him. "We have a very good life, and your welfare is important to a lot of people. Look at all the flowers in here." He paused to motion to several areas of the room. "They're from people who consider you their friend, who are horrified at what you've been through, yet express their gladness that you've survived."

Duo blinked with surprised as he looked around the small room. He hadn't noticed the flowers until that moment. From his limited view point, it looked like every flat surface in the room was filled with plants and flower arrangements, large and small. He looked up to see multiple shiny balloons with _Get well soon_ printed across the front floating in the corner behind his bed

"Charise, Quatre, Trowa and the people you work with and some of the people in your apartment complex sent them. There's even something from Wufei. He sent that orchid," Heero pointed to an elegant potted plant on the table top to his right. It was the most exquisite violet orchid Duo had ever seen. "He wanted me to tell you he's sincerely sorry for having treated you as he did. He hopes, in time, you'll be able to forgive him."

Heero paused, no doubt waiting for a response, but Duo remained quiet and unnaturally still, his eyes unfocused. Fearful of his lover slipping back into a trance, he decided to continue reminding his lover how good his life was, and would be again.

"Listen to me, Duo. You have so much that's good in your life: a job you enjoy, a boss who adores you, and most importantly you have me, heart and soul."

Unable to look directly at his lover, Duo's voice wavered as he timidly asked, "Do I, Heero? I don't know why you would want to be with me after everything that's happened. Hell, my past is a nightmare, and I'm not sure I can get past everything I've gone through. Besides, I'm not the person you thought I was. I was raped by my uncle, Heero, not once or twice, but many times. I told you I was a virgin when I wasn't. Hell, don't you wonder what other skeletons might be lying in my closet? "

He covered his eyes, avoiding Heero's scrutinizing gaze by putting the arm without an IV over his forehead and whispered in an anguished voice. "God, I'm a mess. I wouldn't blame you for hightailing it out of here and never looking back. Me and my damn pretending, my false memories, they almost got the both of us killed, Heero, and in the worst way imaginable."

Insistent hands urged the arm away from his face, and then using his fingertips, Heero tenderly pushed a few errant long strands of hair away from his forehead. "I'm not going anywhere, Duo, and you damn well better stop thinking I'll ever leave you. Now, open your eyes and stop trying to hide from me or from the fact that we're both so incredibly fortunate, lucky beyond belief that Wufei followed us to Hank's place and then followed his hunch that something was seriously wrong inside the house. Somehow, by some miracle, we escaped what Hank had in store for us when others weren't so fortunate. Now here we are, safe and sound with a whole lifetime to spend together. We have a future to look forward to, Duo, and there's no need for you to pretend any longer, not about the past or that your life is perfect. You don't need to pretend you're Laredo or that I'm Tex. From now on, it's just us, Lucky Duo and Damn Lucky Heero, and what a life we're going to have together."

Despite Heero's optimism about the future, Duo couldn't drum up any such feeling. His emotions were in turmoil, his life upended, he couldn't even manage to give Heero the smile he was looking for. It was simply beyond him at the moment. He realized he was probably depressed and something was broken inside of him. How could his life ever be the same after all that had happened? He felt helpless, beaten down. Heero deserved more, someone who wasn't so fucked up.

Swallowing with difficulty and wiping away the tear escaping out of the corner of his eye, Duo shook his head in dismay. "I'm a damn expert at pretending, aren't I, Heero? Maybe I don't know how to live in the real world anymore; from the looks of it, I never did."

Heero's expression remained concerned yet loving as he replied, "I'm here, Duo, and I'm real." His fingertip touched his face as proof of that claim. "What we feel for each other is real, not a figment of your imagination. I'm not in a position to complain about your pretending when that's what brought us together in the first place. It was a tool you used, first to protect yourself, and then to cope. Now that you remember everything, there's no reason for you to pretend any more. You quit imagining yourself as Laredo some time ago, didn't you? That's a good start."

A tear leaked out from the corner of Duo's right eye, but he ignored it, and continued to fight the urge to swipe it away it in order to stay focused on the best thing that had ever happen to him. "Are you sure I'm not still pretending, because from where I stand, you're too good to be true."

"I'm just a man, Duo," Heero replied more soberly. "But for the first time in my life I know what it's like to be in love. I'm not about to give up on us or let you go because things are difficult. Our relationship and the love we have for each other has become the air I breathe."

"For me, too," Duo said, his heart swelling with love for the other man. "I thought I loved other people before. Friends. Family. Trowa. But until you came along I hadn't realized that I've never been _in_ love. And I do love you, Damn Lucky Heero, with all that is in me." There, a natural, though very small, smile found its way to his pale face.

The sound of a throat clearing came from the doorway. "I'm sorry to interrupt," said a deep male voice from behind Heero, "but the nurse told me you were awake. If you're up to it, Mr. Maxwell, I'd like to ask you a couple of questions."

Detective Dawson stepped into the hospital room wearing the same crumpled sports coat he'd worn the first time they'd met as well as the similar grim expression that fit the seriousness of the situation. His partner, Officer Petty, was dressed in his L.A.P.D. uniform, came in behind him, nodding his head to Duo and then Heero.

Dawson approached the bed saying, "Your uncle's in a holding cell downtown and is scheduled to be arraigned later this afternoon. The district attorney's case is being built on Mister Yuy and Chang's statements as well as the body we found in the trunk of a car parked in McGuire's garage. Your account of what happened is needed to solidify our case. Other than what he said to you and Mr. Yuy, most of the evidence we have that he's the serial killer is circumstantial, since the killer apparently wore condoms.

"Body in a car?" Duo asked, having honed in on that part of the detectives explanation of events.

Dawson nodded his "Mr. Yuy has identified the victim as Jason Stanfield. It appears the victim had been stunned then strangled with a leather belt."

"Why?" Duo blurted out, horrified. "Why did he kill Jason?"

"Since McGuire isn't talking, we can only assume his lover suspected what he was up to. Maybe he stumbled on something, or just voiced his suspicions. The coroner estimated the time of death to be somewhere between two and four p.m. on the day Heero found the victim in the elevator. It seems your uncle had a very busy, very bloody day.

That last sentence caused Duo's entire body to shudder with revulsion, a reaction that caused pain to ripple down the front of his chest. He moaned as his stomach threatened to heave over the news of Jason's death and the reminder of the victim Heero had found in the elevator. Damn he felt sick, wondering how someone could hurt anyone the way Hank had? How could a person be so cruel, so evil to hurt another human being like that? He might not be been overly fond of Jason, but neither did he have anything against the man, and no one should die the way he or Hank's other victims had. His stomach turned over again. It a good thing that he hadn't eaten in a couple of days, otherwise the nurse would have had a terrible mess to clean up and what little bit of dignity he had left would have been in ruins.

Detective Dawson was looking concerned when he asked Duo, "Are you up to giving me an account of what you experienced the night you went to your uncle's house?"

Duo nodded, understanding that he had to tell the officer everything he could remember, no matter how unpleasant. Remembering Jason again, he supposed Hank had fooled him just as he had everyone else, portraying himself as just a regular guy instead of the serial killer he'd become. Taking a deep breath, he used Hank's betrayal to those who knew him mentally gear himself up for the coming ordeal.

This wasn't going to be easy.

Up until the other night he hadn't remembered his true past, or anything his uncle had done to him when he was a teenager. He'd suppressed the horrible things Hank had done to him, and tucked them away as a way of surviving the ordeal and keeping his aunt and cousin safe.

He opened his mouth with the intention of going back to the beginning, when he'd first been groomed, molested, then raped and threatened by Hank, but the moment he opened his mouth to speak, the horror of that time rolled over him, and he was thirteen once again. He felt shame, fear and helplessness. He was face down on the floor of his bedroom, his face pressed into the rough berber carpet. pinned there by his uncle who was pressed against his backside, wearing nothing but a lecherous grin on his cruel lips.

"No!" He was frantic to escape from Hank because he knew what was coming next. He didn't want to be there, trapped in his bedroom under that vile man. Would he ever be safe?

_Help me! Please, God, anybody, help me! _

But no help would come; he'd learned that lesson the early on. The only way to escape Hank was to remove himself in the only way he could, by blocking everything out, going to the safe spot he'd created in his mind.

Hands firmly grabbed hold of his upper arms, limiting his movements. With growing despair he realized that Hank had him and would never let him go. He'd never be free of his tormenter.

"Duo! What's wrong?" Heero's alarmed voice cut through the layers of hopelessness and despair and helped to snap him out of the nightmare he'd been trapped in a moment ago. Coming back to himself, he realized he was close to hyperventilating and trembling uncontrollably from head to toe. Blinking, he recognized the wall of a hospital, room, the scent of antiseptic in the air. Yes, that's right, he was in the hospital.

Looking up, Heero's blurred face, inched from his own, came slowly came into focus. As soon as he could see him clearly, his eyes darted to the two other men in the room, then back to Heero, looking for reassurance.

"You're safe, love," Heero said in his most reassuring voice, though a look of anxiousness was evident in his eyes. The abject fear that was in Duo's eyes after he'd snapped out of the trance he'd been in had terrified him. "Shit, Duo. What was that? Your eyes rolled up into your head and you started shaking all over. "

Wiping the tears from his eyes with the heel of his hands, Duo whispered, "I think I just had a flash back. I was thirteen again, and H-H...Hank had me."

Heero cradled his face in his hand, and with determination in his voice he stated, "No one is ever going to hurt you again, Duo. I give you my word." He released Duo's face only to clasp the trembling hands securely between his own, hoping to send a feeling of warmth and connection to the traumatized man.

"Maybe we should call the doctor or put this off until another time," Officer Petty suggested, looking towards the door as if willing someone to come in and help.

Duo wanted so much to believe what Heero was promising. Hadn't he already proved the lengths he was willing to go when they were dealing with the stalker? It wasn't Heero's fault that Hank had maneuvered them into a vulnerable position. He trusted Heero absolutely, with his heart and his life.

The next breath he took was a ragged one, but it marginally helped him to calm down. The trembling that had taken over his body was now limited to his hands. He could do this. He would face the detective's questions and pray that talking about the past wouldn't trigger another dark memory of Hank assaulting him. He was going do this. He had to. Telling the police about his experience Hank might help him to finally purge the bastard from his life. If he wasn't successful at doing that, he might lose Heero, and that would be the end of him.

A comforting squeeze of his hands reassured him that he wasn't alone, and that simple gesture from Heero gave him the added strength he needed. Yes, he could do this, as long as Heero was by his side. His uncle was a notorious serial killer. He'd tortured and murdered his victims, and he and Heero had barely escaped being his latest victims. He would stand up and be strong for the men and woman who hadn't been as fortunate as he and Heero, having had someone burst in and rescue them at the last moment.

The next breath he took came much easier. "I'm good," he told the three closely watching him, though he felt less than confident about that claim. He found his courage, and with Heero nearby his resolve firmed and his fear dimmed, though it didn't disappear completely. In a more determined voice he said, "Let's do this, and make sure Hank never sees the light of day again." He turned to Heero and received a smile of approval. With a nod of his head and his lover giving him a reassuring squeeze of his hand, he was ready to proceed. Looking to Detective Dawson, he began. "I went to live with my Aunt Helen and her family after my parents died." From that point on he gave the police and district attorney everything they needed to eventually nail the lid of Hank McGuire's coffin shut.

By the time Thanksgiving came around Duo's life was back on track and he had plenty to be thankful for. With the lawsuit against Charise having been dismissed by the judge, his boss was back to designing, selling her fashion lines, and making sure her personal assistant wasn't overtaxed yet kept busy. Also, both he and Heero were benefiting from therapy, dealing with the attack as well as Duo's past, now fully recalled. Understandably, their therapist was neither Quatre or Dorothy, but a woman who specialized in treating victims of violent crimes, who had come highly recommended by Detective Dawson.

The days and weeks following his release from the hospital had been trying at times as he and Heero tried to cope with the aftereffects of their encounters with Hank McGuire. They experienced both good and bad days, but as time passed the good days became more the norm.

With the help of Heero, his therapist and returning to his regular routine, Duo eventually began to feel safe. That feeling of safety was aided by the knowledge that Hank was in prison, awaiting trial that was slated to begin in February next year. He was being charged with numerous counts of premeditated murder, stalking, kidnapping, torture and a laundry-list of other crimes. Having scoured the suspect's history, the police and district attorney left no rock unturned in finding Hank McGuire's hidden past. From their efforts, Hank's life, crimes and a long string of horrendous act, across several states, were revealed. Diligent police work, as well as Duo and Heero's depositions, resulted in Hank also being charged with the death of his daughter, Natalie. The district attorney promised him that there was little to no chance at all that his uncle would ever leave prison, other than in a coffin.

When his therapist, Dr. Jillian Stanislaus, asked if he'd like to speak to his uncle, seeking answers and closure, Duo simply shook his head. He wanted nothing to do with that poor excuse for a human being. The only time he planned on seeing his Hank McGuire again was in the courtroom, from the witness stand. He might actually feel closure when the man was found guilty and sentenced to life in prison, or the death penalty. If anyone deserved to die for the crimes he'd committed, it was Hank. Until that day, Duo was determined to do his best to deal with his past and the mistakes he'd made, reclaim his life and solidify his relationship with Heero.

He was healing more and more with each passing day, and in more ways than one as evidenced by the past few weeks, when he'd reconciled with his friends. Surprisingly, it wasn't as difficult as he thought it would be. There was something about almost dying that brought things into perspective and made him want to be a better person

Wufei had been the first to step forward with the intent of making amends. He showed up at their apartment a couple of days after Duo had been released from the hospital, carrying bags of Chinese food and delivering a heartfelt apology. The conversation that evening had been a bit stilted, to say the least, but Wufei wasn't deterred. Knowing he'd confessed his love to Heero just after the rescue, Duo was suspicious of his motives when he first showed up on their doorstep and then continued to invite himself over at least twice a week after that. Commence

Then it seemed as if Lady Fortune was still smiling on Lucky Duo and Damn Lucky Heero when the Chinese man entered their apartment one Sunday evening with stars in his eyes. Wufei promptly announced himself in love with the man of his dreams. Neither he nor Heero had met Milliardo Peacecraft, the object of Wufei's desire, but they couldn't help but share an amused smile and snicker at the mention of the man's name. Milliardo? Who in their right mind would curse their kid for a lifetime with a name like that? And judging by the enormous smile on the smitten man's face, it was clear that Wufei didn't care about the god awful name because he'd fallen head over heels for the reportedly handsome, tall and blond music producer.

Quatre and Trowa also dropped by after he'd returned home, but not before calling ahead to see if he was willing to see them. Bearing more flowers and his favorite sour gummy bear and cinnamon drop candy, the two men came with the intention of repairing the rift between them and becoming better acquainted with Heero. They were taken by surprise when Duo apologized for his past resentment and actions. He explained his change of heart as being a result of his near death experience. When he thought his and Heero's lives were about to end, he'd come to understand how foolish he'd been in so many aspects of his life and relationships. He didn't want to die with regrets or guilt. Realizing that he'd never loved Trowa, well, not like he did Heero, he could only guess that he'd held onto Trowa because he'd confused the love of a friend for that of a lover. In retrospect, he'd also realized that Trowa had acted honorably, confessing his growing feelings for Quatre and breaking up with him before advancing their relationship. His jealousy of their relationship, casting blame on everyone but himself, had come close to destroying their friendship.

By the end of that visit the four men had established the first solid steps towards true reconciliation. Duo even exchanged hugs with both of them as they left that evening. Rebuilding his relationships with Wufei, Quatre and Trowa had lifted a weight from his shoulders, and gave him sense of accomplishment. That left him with one final relationship to mend, with his Aunt Helen. They'd talked on the phone regularly, mostly reassuring each other that they were coping with what had happened. It was agreed that they needed to get together to say what couldn't be said over the phone.

That decision had led to this moment.

It was Thanksgiving Day, and he and Heero were standing before the familiar front door of his aunt's home, waiting for her to answer doorbell. It was rather painful, returning to his aunt's house, recalling all the good and bad that had happened here. But Duo knew it was only right that he apologize to her in person. After all, he'd wrongly blamed her for his problems for far too long. It was time to rectify this part of his past, make peace with his aunt and get on with the process of healing.

At last the door opened. "Here you are, right on time," said the elderly woman wearing a smile that seemed nervous. Six months had passed since his last visit home, and during that time his aunt had changed. Was he wrong, or was she shorter than he remembered? Her shoulders, once posture perfect, were now hunch forward slightly, and there was now more gray in hair than he recalled. All of these outward changes were a sign of her advancing years.

"And you must be Heero. Hello, I'm Helen McGuire." She held out her hand, which he took and gently shook before letting it go. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Welcome to my home." Stepping back and opening the door further, Helen motioned them inside where the most wonderful aroma of roasted turkey filled the air.

"Smells great, auntie," Duo said with a wide grin. He'd already informed Heero that he was in for a treat as his aunt was a fantastic cook.

After closing the door, Helen escorted them into her living room. "Please make yourselves comfortable." She settled herself in a comfortable looking recliner that was covered with a green, pink and white floral fabric. As the two men sat on the sofa she motioned towards the table on which lay a plate and round tray containing a teapot and three cups and saucers. "I don't want to spoil your appetite, but I baked your favorite cookies, Duo. Would either of you care for some tea?

After the polite introductions and pleasantries were over, the tea cups drained and cookies tasted, a long, awkward silence filled the room. It seemed no one wanted to start the conversation each of the three knew was inevitable.

After squaring his shoulders, Duo took the initiative to begin. "I want to apologize, auntie, for blaming you for my problems. I... I somehow made myself forget what Hank had done to me and to Natalie. I'm so sorry..."

"No, dear."Helen put her hand up, signaling for him to stop. With tears pooling in her faded green eyes and a wavering voice, she continued, "You're not to blame. I don't think I ever explained to you my reasons for divorcing Frank, or about the man I was married to for nearly twenty years. But today, like the day the police turned up at my door to question me about him, all of our dirty laundry needs to be put out to dry before we can put it away forever."

Taking a shaky breath, she continued thoughtfully. "I honestly didn't think we had a bad marriage, not that we didn't have our share of issues," she began. "The only complaint I had for years was that Hank didn't seem to want to have relations with me more than once or twice a month. Your mother told me your father couldn't get enough of her, so I thought it must be me, that Hank wasn't attracted to me in a physical way. I did everything I could to make myself appealing to him, spent years getting my hair styled, nails done and exercised regularly in order to keep my figure. All of that and still his desire for me never increased. I gave up trying after ten years of marriage." Blushing with embarrassment, she said, "On one of the rare times we had... um...relations, I became pregnant with Natalie." Helen paused and a wistful smile appeared on her weathered face. "I was ecstatic at the news. After not getting pregnant for so long, and being in my late thirties, I'd come to believe that I would never have children."

Duo was about to tell her how his aunt how grateful he was for taking him into her home after the devastating death of his parents. Her love and kindness had help to heal his broken heart. But as he opened his mouth to speak, Heero's hand squeezed his forearm. He turned his head to his lover. He read Heero's lips as he advised, "Let her say what she needs to say." He nodded, understanding that he wasn't the only one needing to put the past behind him.

The woman's smile was bittersweet as she recalled that time. "The happiest moment of my life was the day Natalie was born. I poured into my darling little girl all the love and affection I had in me. Natalie was a godsend, Duo, because I finally had someone who loved and needed me as much as I did them.

"And we did, auntie," Duo assured her. "Both Natalie and I were blessed to have you for our Mom."

She gave him a grateful smile before continuing. "You came to live with us years later, and even though the death of your parents was a sad time for all of us, I felt even more blessed to have my sister's child in my home to love and cherish."

She paused to sigh, and woefully shook her head. "During the early years of our marriage, I truly believed Hank was a good husband. He worked hard to support us without complaint, helped around the house and later with you kids. The only thing he asked for, just after we were married, was to have some time to himself.

"Fool that I was, I believed him when he said he was playing poker on Monday nights, and bowling with a league on Thursdays. I never questioned his going out until one night he came home more than a little drunk. Being so inebriated, he didn't bother with his usual shower, but fell into bed and was asleep before his head hit the pillow. After a few minutes, I detected a familiar, odd odor coming from him. It was a musky smell. I leaned closer, taking a deeper sniff and realized he smelled of sex, plus a faint citrus fragrance. It was definitely cologne, but not the kind he usually wore.

"I questioned him the next day, but he was adament that he'd been bowling with the guys and drank a bit too much of some imported beer and claimed he'd spilled some on his shirt and pants. My instincts told me he was lying, but in hindsight I think I just didn't want to believe that anything else was going on.

"That was when my problems with sleeping began. I'd lay awake at night worrying about where Hank was and what he was really doing on Monday and Thursday nights. I wanted to trust him, and told myself that I was overreacting because he never again came home smelling like he'd had sex. After a month of barely sleeping, and almost burning down the house when I fell asleep in the middle of cooking dinner one evening, I went to the doctor and got a prescription to help me sleep. I took those pills for more years than I care to count."

Looking as sad as her voice sounded, Helen continued, "I suppose in some way I was running away from my problems by taking those pills. If I hadn't been so out of it, so dependent of the medication, I might have heard what was going on in my own house." Raising her anguished eyes to her nephew, she said, "I give you my word, Duo; I didn't know what he was doing to you before the night I found him in your room. Maybe if I been more aware, I'd have heard Natalie when she got up during the night and she'd be alive today."

Duo reached out and took his only relative's hand in his own. "I know you would have tried to protect us if you'd known what was happening. You can't blame yourself for Natalie's death, Aunt Helen, or Hank molesting me. Neither of us would want you to. I have no doubt that if it had been you instead of Natalie who walked into my room that night, you would have died in her place. Then both she and I would have been at his mercy."

Giving him a watery-eyed smile, her chin trembling as she struggled with her emotions, Helen nodded. "Natalie was a good girl, wasn't she? I miss her every single day and don't know how I've gone on without her." They spent a few moment passed in silent contemplation of the young girl you had meant the world to their little family.

"Me, too, auntie," Duo agreed.

A familiar feeling of sadness embraced him, just as it always did whenever he thought about his cousin's tragic death and her absence in their lives. After a few moments the intensity of it lessened and he looked at his aunt. He ready now to know more about the past.

"You never talked about the night you kick Hank out of the house and ended your marriage. I can remember now the when and why you showed him the door, but I'd like to hear your version." This wasn't a comfortable subject for him, but he felt he needed to hear what his aunt said in order to put these last few pieces of his past together.

Closing her eyes for a moment, Helen seemed to be searching her thoughts before she spoke again. Then taking a deep breath, she opened them and looked at her nephew. "I guess I should have known he had designs on you, but I naively gave him the benefit of a doubt, wanting so badly to hold our family together, and for that I owe you the deepest and sincerest of apologies. If I'd only..." She stopped and lowered her face into her hands, and her shaking shoulders were evidence that she was crying, though no sound left her lips.

Going to his aunt, Duo knelt down next to her chair and from the awkward position put his arm around her shoulders. "It's okay, auntie. You can tell me when you're ready."

Helen nodded her head, and had somewhat composed herself before lifting her face from her hands. With tears streaking down from anguished eyes, she gave him a nod of her head; she was ready to continue.

"Before you came to live with us, maybe two years earlier, Hank once again took to going out at night again, taking in a ball game or going to the movies. He had a slew of believable reasons for being away from home so often. Sometimes, being wrapped up in my own life as well as Natalie's, I honestly didn't care what he was doing as long as he wasn't under foot. But I once again I became suspicious of his activities, especially when he started making it a habit of coming home well after I had fallen asleep. This time, I didn't think I could ignore the voice in my head, telling me he was up to no good. I got out the yellow pages and called a detective agency and arranged for someone to follow him."

Pain and sadness lined the older woman's face, especially around her eyes. The past held a lot of pain for her as well. "Where was he going?" He was almost afraid of the answer.

The older woman's face became flushed once again. "The detective followed Hank to a gay bar. He presented me with photos of my husband kissing another man, putting his hands on his body. When they went into the men's room, the detective followed. I don't think I need to tell you what activities went on in there. I confronted him a week later when Natalie was out of the house and I'd gotten over the initial shock of his dual life. He confessed it was true. He said he'd been trying to fight his attraction to other men for as long as he could remember, but he was adamant that he didn't want a divorce. He promised me he would stay away from the bars and men in order to save our family and marriage." His aunt's voice was tight, and it looked as if she was on the verge of breaking down again.

"I wasn't sure if he really meant it, but after that day he did come home every night after work and went to bed at the same time I did. After a couple of months, I resumed my habit of wearing earplugs, to block out Hank's snoring. You remember how bad his snoring was, don't you?"

"I think even the neighbors down the block could hear that awful noise," Duo replied somberly.

Helen's composure finally broke. Covering her face with her hands, she began to cry in earnest as she continued. "Between the sleeping pills and earplugs, I slept so soundly that nothing could have disturbed my sleep. And while I was blissfully sleeping, Hank was molesting you. God help me, I didn't know. I never heard a think from your bedroom or Natalie get up during the night, or her cry as Hank pushed her down the stairs. That... that monster had to shake me awake in order to tell me there had been an accident." Looking up with wet, red rimmed eyes she said. "I hate him, and curse the day I married him."

Fighting back his own tears, Duo leaned forward to kiss his aunt's cheek, tasting the salty wetness on his lips. He felt like a heel for having to bring up such painful memories to the woman who'd had enough sorrow in her life. He was about to apologize for causing her so much pain when his aunt continued. It seemed like this was the day to get everything off of their chests, including all the pent up secrets they'd held inside for far too long.

"We fell apart after her death and began sleeping in separate bedrooms, each of us dealing with the overwhelming grief in our own way. At least, that's what I'd convinced myself was the reason for our in-house separation. We barely spoke to each other as we grieved for our child. I have to wonder now if that was a sham, if he ever cared for me or Natalie. It makes me physically ill to think he'd been putting up an act the whole time."

"He was very clever," Duo said. "He had Heero and I both convinced that he was a good guy."

Helen nodded, then a look of tenderness crossed her face as she turned to Duo. "You were such a comfort to me after Natalie's death. I don't know how I would have survived those dark days without you."

"Helping you was the only way I could cope with her death," he confessed.

She tenderly touched his face, a sad smile on her lips. "As the months passed and the sorrow ebbed slightly," she continued, "but I realized after a while that you seemed rather reluctant to come home. I thought at the time it was because we'd lost both Buster and Natalie within the same year, that our home had blue funk a painful place for you."

Shaking her head she added, "I was stupid not to take you to the doctor, but I honestly thought you'd come out of it. A doctor's exam would have shown what that monster had been doing to you. You'd changed, had become more quite and introspective. But I dismissed those changes because Hank and I had also changed after Natalie's death, and told myself the blue funk you were in was normal, an aftereffect of grieving for your parents, Buster and then Natalie.

A spark of fury lit Helen's eyes though her voice remained calm as she continued. "But again I was wrong. As time passed, you failed to get better and seemed to be withdrawing even further. I was worried sick about you.

I decided to set up an appointment with a counselor. But when I told you about it, you insisted I cancel it, telling me all kids your age were moody and on edge. I don't know why I believed you, but I did."

"It was Hank," Duo whispered. He rose from his aunt's side to return to sit by Heero and the sofa. Heero took his hand in his own, offering what comfort he could. "Hank threatened to hurt you like he had Natalie and Buster if the cops were ever called. He'd already proved to be a man of his word, so I did what he said."

Helen shook her head, her misery making her look worn out, "It's shocking, how he manipulated everyone in our family. I feel so stupid that I never saw him for what he was." Duo nodded in agreement.

Then leaning back into her chair, she closed her eyes as she continued with her story. "I vaguely recall the night everything in our lives fell apart. It was a Saturday night and I was getting ready for bed as usual. I poured my sleeping pills into my hand and paused, thinking about Hank going out of his way to reminded me to take them before I went upstairs. I wondered why he bothered, seeing as we were still sleeping in separate rooms. That niggling suspicion for why he wanted to make sure I was asleep just wouldn't go away. So I put the pills back in the bottle and left my earplugs in their container, then made my way up to my room and bed and then I waited. In spite of my resolve to stay alert to any sound, I dozed off after a short while, only to wake up to the sound of a rhythmic thumping. I got out of bed, tiptoed to the spare room and put my ear to the door. It wasn't coming from Hank's room. I carefully opened the door and saw that he wasn't in his bed. Turning around, I followed the sound right to your door. Again, I put my ear to the door and heard whispering as well as the thumping. The voice speaking was a deep enough that I knew it couldn't be you, so I turned the knob and flung open the door."

The room fell silent as Helen and Duo recalled the night, neither able to look at the other.

Helen took a deep, shaky breath. "I was shocked and horrified by what I found. Hank immediately jumped up from the bed, still fully aroused, giving me a view of you lying naked, on your stomach, your hands fisting the bed sheets on both sides of your head. You didn't acknowledge me, but kept your eyes squeezed shut, your mouth pressed tightly together. I rounded on Hank and screamed in no uncertain terms for him to get out, that he was a sick bastard and we were over. I swore that if he didn't leave that instant I'd have him thrown in jail. Lord forgive me, I should have done just that, but I didn't. The decision not to call the police wasn't for my benefit, because I was devastated, but to protect you, Duo. I had no idea how long he'd been molesting you, though he said it had only been that one time. I didn't believe him, not for a second, and I never would believe a single word from him again. He left that night with only a suitcase filled with some clothes and I never saw or spoke to him again. I..." she looked up pleadingly, tears trailing unchecked down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry, Duo. I let you down. I should have followed my initial intuition and kicked Hank out of the house when he admitted he'd been going to gay bars."

Duo was horrified and felt ill at hearing his aunt's version of that horrible night. He'd remembered her presence in the room, but not the details of what happened. He looked to Heero for help, but his lover was staring at the floor. He'd told him before they'd come that he wouldn't get involved in this conversation, feeling it wasn't his place. So it was up to him. "You couldn't have known what he was turning into, auntie, and I don't know how you could have stopped him."

Another shuddering breath and a swipe at the tears on her face, and the older woman appeared ready to continue her story. "After he packed his bags and left the house, I went to your room to talk to you. Imagine my surprise when I found you sound asleep. I couldn't believe you could have gone to sleep after what had just happened. I called your name, but you didn't stir, not even a bit. I debated about whether or not to let you sleep or pester you into waking up. I decided to wait until morning to speak with you.

"When I woke up the next day, I was angrier than a stirred-up hornet's nest and thought better about letting Hank walk away. I made breakfast and then went to your room to wake you. I was again shocked when you acted as if nothing had happened. I tried to talk to you, to find out how long Hank had been molesting you so that we could go to the police, but you acted as if you didn't know what I was talking about. In fact, you casually asked me where Hank was, and from the expression on your face, you were generally curious, not angry, ashamed or frightened. I had no idea what to think. I expected some sort of reaction from you, but you behaved as if that morning was just like any other.

"I sat at the kitchen table at a complete loss over what to do while I watched you finished your breakfast and go outside to ride your bike. I called into work and took a sick day so that I could keep an eye on you and think about what course of action I should take. I came to the conclusion that you were somehow blocking from your mind what had happened, protecting yourself. Taking you down to the hospital for a rape test would have been traumatic for you, and going to the police to press charges against Hank wouldn't have done much good because it would have been my word against his, and you couldn't remember him molesting you to back me up."

Leaning forward, Helen sought her nephew's eyes. "I wish you could have said something to me then. Together we could might have been able to find a way to stop him. I feel sick whenever I think that if I'd done something different, I might have been able to prevent the deaths of those poor people Hank murdered. I swear I never saw that kind of evil in him, just as I never suspected him of the disappearance of Buster or of Natalie's death. The police told me you remembered him using both of them to threaten you into silence, and that you told them he killed them both."

Duo nodded, feeling somewhat numb from the conversation. He pulled a tissue from the box on the table and wiped at his eyes and nose, stalling for a moment to put a check on his emotions. He felt Heero release his hand, only to feel an arm go around his shoulders. In a strained voice he recalled, "I remember him pinning me to my mattress and whispering into my ear that he would kill Buster, and then do the same to you and Natalie if I ever said anything about what he was doing to me. I believed him, and to prove to me that he was serious, he took me to the storage shed in the backyard a day after Buster disappeared and showed me his mutilated body. He'd tortured our dog to death." He squeezed his eyes shut, wanting to block that horrific memory, but another one came in it's place.

Opening his eyes again, he focused on his tightly clenched hands on his lap. "I knew better than to make any sound," he began as the memory of the night Natalie died urged him to speak, "but I must have made some kind of noise that night, because my bedroom door opened while Hank was the middle of... well, you know." He decided to skip the unsavory details of his sexual assault with his aunt. She was pretty traumatized already. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he continued. "There was a gasp from the doorway and Hank jumped off the bed and ran out of the room. A few moments later I heard Natalie cry out and then the sound of someone falling down the staircase.

"God, how I prayed it was Hank, that he was dead; but it wasn't him. He came back into the bedroom moments later and put on his bedclothes before he grabbed me by my hair and threatened me with your life if I said anything to the police. He coached me to say I hadn't heard anything, that I was sound asleep until the doorbell rang."

Looking at his aunt, he saw in her eyes the same pain and regret he was feeling. "I somehow pushed every ugly thing that happened back then, so far back in my mind that I honestly didn't remember any of it until Hank alluded to molesting me when he had Heero and me at his mercy. I'm sorry I didn't say anything to you, auntie. I wish I could have been strong enough to face reality."

There were tears in Helen's eyes and her lips trembled. "It seems we're both equally sorry, Duo. I never suspected Hank was involved in Natalie's death. I should have known something was wrong with him, but I didn't.. I never thought Hank would harm his daughter, or you, for that matter."

"I think," Heero interjected, immediately gaining the attention of the other two people in the room, "that maybe we should move on to another subject, and come back to the subject of Natalie after you take a break. Why don't we address Helen's attempts to dissuade Duo from his sexual orientation?"

Helen's momentary look of relief was short lived, while Duo unclenched his fists to rub his palms on his jean covered thighs. "I know you think I was wrong," she began, looking contrite, "but I didn't know what else to do. After all that had happened with Hank, I took it upon myself to protect you from men like him, and the only way I could think of doing that was pointing out the pitfalls of that lifestyle."

"It isn't a lifestyle," Heero stated, holding back his annoyance as much as possible.

Helen didn't respond to it, but continued on with what she was saying. "Unfortunately, I confused being homosexual with protecting you from a molester. As my only living family remaining, I thought it was my duty to protect you from Hank and anyone else who had sexual designs on you because you were so young and attractive. I didn't mean to hurt you, Duo. I just wanted you to be happy and safe."

With a sober expression, Duo replied, "I accept your apology, knowing you were only doing what you thought best. I've wanted to apologize to you, too, for blaming you for all my problems. Maybe your refusal to believe I was gay didn't help matters, but it was Hank who was the cause of them. I... I pushed all the bad memories of Hank out of my mind and made you the villain."

Helen looked her nephew in the eyes, seeing a mirror of her own sorrow in the violet depths. "There are too many apologies and regrets between us. No more apologizing, all right? There will always be regret and sorrow for things not said or done, but the past is the past. We need to acknowledge mistakes and learn from them, but we also need to put the past to rest and look to a better future. I think that will be easier to do after the trial is over, but it looks as if you're already making great headway." Blushing, the woman's eyes shifted towards Heero, indicating he stood as a symbol of Duo's recovery.

Helen continued to look at Heero, giving him a shy smile. "I'm glad you could come to dinner today, Heero. Duo's told me that you're not only the man he loves, but that you're a successful lawyer. I... I'm not altogether comfortable with his being gay, but I love Duo dearly and want him to be happy. Please, be good to him. And if you can put up with an old, set-in-her-ways woman, I'd like to be a part of your lives. Duo's the only family I have left in this world, and I don't want to lose him because once again I refused to accept the reality of the situation."

Heero nodded. "I have no objections, as long as you don't undermine his self worth or our relationship."

The older woman looked relieved, and with a nervous grin she replied, "I'm sure you'll let me know if I step out of line."

Heero finally managed a genuine smile for the woman with the faded blond hair and eyes that might have once been a true green.

Slapping his knees with his hands, Duo announced, "I smell turkey. Do you think it's done?" He was ready to move on from the depressing conversation.

Helen rose from her seat. "I'll go check. Why don't you and Heero wash up and then come in and help me. You always carve the bird so nicely, Duo." With a last loving glance to her nephew and a parting smile to Heero, Helen left the room for the kitchen.

They waited until she was out of the room before Heero spoke. "That went well."

"Better than I thought it would," Duo agreed. "I hope we've finally put the past behind us now."

Heero braved kissing him, even though they'd decided to refrain from any physical affection that might upset his aunt. "I love you," he whispered.

"And thank God for that," Duo answered with a small chuckle and grin. "Because I love you more than Aunt Helen's pumpkin pie, and that's saying a lot."

They leaned back against the sofa, Duo feeling comfortable with Heero's arm draped over his shoulders. "There's something comforting about being back home," he said with a contented sigh.

"It's hard to believe you feel that way after all that happened under this roof."

"Believe it or not, there were good times to overshadow what Hank did, and when I push those bad memories aside, all the good memories of Natalie, Buster and my aunt are there. Natalie was more than my cousin, Heero, she was my friend. She had a great sense of humor and a contagious laugh. Before and even after her death, Aunt Helen and I were close and we managed to find happy moments despite what Hank was up to and the fact that I was probably a typical, obnoxious teenager."

"I'm glad you've still got memories that make you smile," Heero said sincerely. "Because you're going to need a smile when you meet my family next month.

"They've agreed to let us visit?"

"I suspect my Mom is the one to credit for us being invited. My grandfather is a proud man, and my being gay upset his plans for passing on the ranch to someone with the Yuy name. Mema is just as excited for us to show up for New Years, and there's no guarantee what her life or circumstances are, so be prepared for anything."

Duo stood from the sofa and turned to offer Heero his hand. As his lover stood, Duo took a step closer to him. "Speaking of family. I think the one thing we've never talked about was having a family. Maybe it's too soon in our relationship, but I just want to put it out there that I wouldn't mind a kid or two... maybe even a couple more. I found being an only child was pretty lonely. I always thought that if I became a parent, I'd have a lot of kids to keep each other company."

A dark eyebrow rose in question. "What do you mean by a 'couple more'?"

Duo laughed. "Well, we can add them to our family one at a time and see how it goes. I figure we can afford to adopt or find a surrogate, since we're combining our incomes. The surrogate might be preferable because that way your Moms and grandparents could have the grandchild they dreamed about, carrying on the family name, and aunt Helen could have a child to spoil."

Toying with the front of Heero's shirt and looking up at his lover through the fringe of hair over his forehead, Duo added, "But if you don't mind, I'd kind of like a kid of my own, using my last name, too, seeing that I'm the last person to keep the family name going. You can do the same, if you'd like. Then, if we find our cup of happiness overflowing, I was thinking we could adopt. There are a lot of kids out there who need a loving family."

Heero touched his lover's cheek. He didn't want to rain on Duo's day, informing him that it might be difficult to adopt, seeing that Duo had been not only abused as a child, but that the both of them had been attacked and traumatized by a serial killer. That information was bound to have a negative effect on a psychological test. Taking a deep breath, he pushed that doubt aside for the time being. "I suppose if we're going to have a family, you and I should do something about becoming legal. Do you want to be my partner on paper, and promise to spend your life with me and this pack of kids you want to have?"

The long haired man's eyes shimmered and his smile was brilliant in response to Heero's proposal. "I was going to suggest the same to you, but later tonight in our hotel room, where I can kiss the living daylights out of you."

"Are you boys coming?" Helen called from the kitchen, breaking up the tender moment.

"In a minute," Duo called back. Then to Heero he asked, "Do you think we should tell her we're getting hitched?"

"What? And risk a heart attack before dinner?" Heero had one eyebrow raised, and feigned a look of haughtiness that Duo thought was damn sexy. " I think we can wait until after the pumpkin pie."

Duo chuckled and hugged his lover, giving him an extra squeeze before stepping back. "Come on, let's wash our hands. I'll lock the door and show you properly how I feel."

Heero's expression was one of surprised when he asked, "Now?" After all, they were suppose to be keeping their hands to themselves while visiting Helen.

"Two minutes is all I need," Duo whispered, shifting his eyebrows suggestively and smiling wickedly. He then pulled his fiancé up the stairs and into the bathroom, where he promptly closed and locked the door. Turning around, he pulled Heero into a kiss while reaching for the button on the waistband of his slacks. That was the beginning of a warm memory the two lovers would recall for many years to come of their first Thanksgiving together.

The End

Author's long note: Well my friends, we find ourselves at the end of yet another story. The Pretender, my 69th story, might just be my swan song, the end of the line. I haven't anything else in my files that are near completion, and I'm sorry to say I have very little time to devote to writing. I've oodles of ideas but just can't seem to sit down and develop them. I've had a lot of fun writing Gundam Wing fan fiction all these years and have appreciated your kind responses and encouragement in your reviews and email. Thank you again and again. If you're looking for more Dyna stories, years ago I wrote under a different name for a short time. I believe Link Worshiper was the only one to guess it was me, sharp girl that she is. Search for Bane's Desire on this site and you'll find a couple of stories you might not have read before. Don't leave a review there because I no longer have that email address and can't access my account because I forgot the password. A monumental thanks to Swordy, who's been with me since... Web of Betrayal? *scratches head* Either that or Heero's Fourth. As my proofreader, she been incredibly patient and kind while correcting my idiotic mistakes. You're the best, Swordy! Again, thanks to all of you.


End file.
